He found her by the bed, an open suitcase in front of her. She had a soft smile on her face as she contemplated something she held. He had not seen her look so happy since…since their wedding day, he thought guiltily. She looked up at him then and smiled, as she put something away in the bag. He caught a glimpse of something black, something silk. She followed his gaze, and a faint blush colored her cheeks. Looking back at him she met his gaze. A smile tugged at the corner of his lips.
"Prithvi, I'm so happy that we are doing this," she said as she moved toward him smiling brightly, "everything happened so fast with us that we never thought about a honeymoon."
Her declaration jarred him back to cruel reality. No, he could not go to Manali.
"Sach kahoon toh," she continued, "these things didn't matter much to me before. But Prithvi, I realize now that…we need to get away from our life for a bit, especially with everything that has happened in our lives, we just haven't had a chance to…to get away from it all, and the stress of it was taking a toll on our relationship. Manali is going to be perfect for us Prithvi!" She looked into the distance thoughtfully, "Everything will be just fine then..," she said softly, more to herself than him.
He closed his eyes a beat, preparing himself to break her heart again. But he had to do this, he thought, his jaw clenched.
"Damini, I know you really you want to go but…I just realized that this is really bad timing…work wise." She looked back at him, her soft smile frozen for a moment.
"Varun hain na Prithvi. Woh sab achi tarah se sambhal raha hai", she said, looking at him intently.
"Haan lekin, maa ki tabiyat…
"Maine doctor se baat kar li hain Prithvi", she said, her smile fading now, "he assured me that mom is doing much better. And it's just a matter of three days".
He rubbed his forehead, and said "Aur phir Avni ki halat…"
Her voice grew hard and cold as she interrupted, "Avni ke saath Jai hain…lekin tum mere saath nahin ho Prithvi". Her smile had been replaced by a hurt confusion.
He looked away then, cursing himself was taking away her smile again. A cold, painful understanding washed over her when he could not meet her gaze. He did not want to go. He did not want to spend time with her.
"Prithvi..." her voice broke as she said his name. "agar tum jaana nahin chahte toh keh do! Yoon bahane banane ke zaroorat nahin! I can handle the truth!" she said defiantly, the hurt shining in her eyes.
"Nahin Damini, aisa kuch nahin....", but he looked away again, not knowing what to say.
"Toh kya hain Prithvi?" She asked him intently, willing him to give her something that made sense. Because she was breaking under this pain. But he didn't say anything.
She closed her eyes against the pain for a moment, to keep her from breaking. Then she walked slowly to the dresser drawer, removed something and walked back to stand in front of him. She held up two airline tickets, eyes brimming in pain and anger lacing her voice.
"I have tried time and again to close the distance between us. I can't do this anymore. I can't bear to be near you but not be with you. I had wanted to get away with you," she shook her head looking at the man who could hurt her so much, "but now I want to get away from you." She pressed one ticket to his chest as she declared, "I am going to Manali, whether you come or not." The ticket fell to the ground as she let her hand fall. And she walked out of the room without looking back.
***
Five minutes to boarding, she thought, looking at her watch again. She had decided that she was going to do this trip alone. She loved her independence and had never needed anyone. She had let herself do things she never would have for anyone, but she did them for him. What a fool she had been. She needed this trip, she needed to find herself again because she was afraid she didn't recognize herself anymore. Why did he have this effect on her! No, this is good! This trip will be her journey to self-discovery!
Her thoughts were interrupted by heavy footsteps walking toward her. In one moment hope flared within her. But in the next her hope died a cruel death, as she saw a man walk toward the woman sitting next to her. The two of them hugged and laughed as they walked toward the gate.
Why was she disappointed? Why was she looking around hoping to see him? Enough waiting, she decided. She stood up then, rolled her carry on and walked toward the gate, her head held high.
Ye Hai Mohabbatein
Arjun
Cricket
