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'Enough.' Pragya whispered.
But it didn't seem like anyone had heard her. Wasn't that surprising?
Aaliya was busy painting Pragya as a characterless woman. And she was doing a damn good job of it as well. Mitali was standing in as a witness, saying she had seen Pragua and Suresh going into a room and then lock the door. Taiji was busy showing fake self righteousness and Tanu was smirking. It was as if she knew that today was Pragya's last day in this house.
From the moment Aaliya had started this charade, from the moment that Pragya had overcome her shock at the depths that Aaliyah would sink to, to malign her, Pragya had eyes for only two people.
Abhi and Daadi.
They were the only ones that mattered. Their belief the only belief she needed. Their validation the only validation she wanted. But she had seen the shock turn into disbelief, and the disbelief turn into anger and then disgust as Aaliya proceeded to show them the video that she had made of her and Suresh.
Pragya didn't know whether to be happy or sad about the fact that she didn't think that Aaliya could sink that low. That she still had that much of faith in the basic goodness of people. Because having faith and hope had just brought her pain and nothing else.
She could somewhere understand Aaliya's hatred in regards to Purab. Because Aaliya loved Purab. And love was blind. Hadn't Pragya herself experienced that? Not once but twice now?
With Suresh, she had refused to see that he was in love with her sister. And with Abhi, she had turned a blind eye to his hatred, believing that one day he will call in love with her too. Hoping that if she did everything he wanted, if she became everything he needed, may be just once, he would look at her like she mattered. And wasn't it pathetic, that she was just now realising how low had she sunk?
Love was not supposed to be like this. Love was not this, this acceptance of infidelities and emotional abuse. This was not what she had dreamt of. She had never wanted this much money or that big a house. All she had wanted was an understanding partner and a small dwelling to call home.
Why was she being punished then? What was her crime? That she was just an ordinary middle class girl? No. May be that wasn't the crime. There was nothing wrong in being middle class. The crime was that an ordinary middle class girl had dared to love the rockstar. No one cared if you were poor, if that is where you stayed. But because she had fallen for a millionaire, she was labeled as a good digger. And a characterless woman. But she had had enough.
'Enough.' Pragya screamed.
'You have achieved what you set out to do, Aaliya. I am leaving this house. But before I go, I think all of you need to hear a few truths.' Pragya said, looking at everyone.
'I feel bad for you Aaliya. That you will never understand what it means to be a woman. That you will never understand what respect actually means. Right now, people respect you because you are some famous celebrity's sister. For all you know, they must be laughing behind your back. I pity you, because you will never know love. Because you don't have it in you to love. The person you claim to love the most, your brother, you will be the reason for the sadness in his life. You don't know how to recognise when someone loves you. I feel bad for you because you will never grow up. You will always be a five years old throwing a tantrum. You don't have to hate me Aaliya. If I am right, you will have no shortage of things to hate in this life.' Pragya whispered, looking in the eyes of a stricken Aaliya.
She turned towards Tanu, whose smirk had faded hearing the words Pragya had spoken to Aaliya.
'You can have him Tanu. You deserve him. You will make quiet a pair. A back stabber and a coward. But be cautious, he is very susceptible to gossip. It will only take one person to fill his ears about you or your alleged affairs and he will be convinced that you are cheating on him. Knowing you, they probably will be true. But remember this, you might have gained the money, but you will never gain security. You will never be able to sleep securely because you know that both of you are insecure in this relationship. Both of you will be vulnerable, which would have been fine if there had been trust. But there isn't, is there Tanu? So both of you will be waiting, for the other one to strike. I can see that it's going to be quite a life.' Pragya said to Tanu, who was looking scared, her victorious smile no where to be seen.
She stopped in front of Abhi, who was looking at her with an expression of fear mixed with longing. Longing for what, she had no idea. And now, she didn't even want to know.
'You know, I read somewhere that who you fall in love with speaks more about you and not that person. That we fall for the love we deserve. And I don't know at what point in my life I convinced myself that this was the sort of love I deserved. That this humiliation and maligning of my character was okay, because you were too naive to understand what was happening around you. I did a great disservice to myself. After a point, women get tired of boys. They need men. A man who can protect them, stand by their side in the trials of life, a partner who is understanding and respectful. But all you are is a boy. Who believes that witches are real. I don't blame you because I fell in love with you. That is on me. You never made any promises. If anything, you reminded me constantly of how much you hate me. But that's the only thing I don't hate you for. I blame you for the insults you heaped on my sister, on the humiliation you meted out to me on a daily basis, for you flaunting you relationship at me on a constant basis. But more than hatred, I feel sorry for you. Because you will never be a man. You will always be a puppet whose strings will be pulled by those around him.' Pragya didn't wait to see Abhi's reaction to her words.
She turned her back to him and went and stood infront of Daadi.
'I have nothing to say to you except thank you. You were the only source of light in this house for me.' Saying that, she bent and touched her feet.
As Pragya crossed the treshhold of Mehra mansion, she didn't know what she would do or where she would go. She only knew that she was lost. And she had finally, finally taken the first step to find herself.
But it didn't seem like anyone had heard her. Wasn't that surprising?
Aaliya was busy painting Pragya as a characterless woman. And she was doing a damn good job of it as well. Mitali was standing in as a witness, saying she had seen Pragua and Suresh going into a room and then lock the door. Taiji was busy showing fake self righteousness and Tanu was smirking. It was as if she knew that today was Pragya's last day in this house.
From the moment Aaliya had started this charade, from the moment that Pragya had overcome her shock at the depths that Aaliyah would sink to, to malign her, Pragya had eyes for only two people.
Abhi and Daadi.
They were the only ones that mattered. Their belief the only belief she needed. Their validation the only validation she wanted. But she had seen the shock turn into disbelief, and the disbelief turn into anger and then disgust as Aaliya proceeded to show them the video that she had made of her and Suresh.
Pragya didn't know whether to be happy or sad about the fact that she didn't think that Aaliya could sink that low. That she still had that much of faith in the basic goodness of people. Because having faith and hope had just brought her pain and nothing else.
She could somewhere understand Aaliya's hatred in regards to Purab. Because Aaliya loved Purab. And love was blind. Hadn't Pragya herself experienced that? Not once but twice now?
With Suresh, she had refused to see that he was in love with her sister. And with Abhi, she had turned a blind eye to his hatred, believing that one day he will call in love with her too. Hoping that if she did everything he wanted, if she became everything he needed, may be just once, he would look at her like she mattered. And wasn't it pathetic, that she was just now realising how low had she sunk?
Love was not supposed to be like this. Love was not this, this acceptance of infidelities and emotional abuse. This was not what she had dreamt of. She had never wanted this much money or that big a house. All she had wanted was an understanding partner and a small dwelling to call home.
Why was she being punished then? What was her crime? That she was just an ordinary middle class girl? No. May be that wasn't the crime. There was nothing wrong in being middle class. The crime was that an ordinary middle class girl had dared to love the rockstar. No one cared if you were poor, if that is where you stayed. But because she had fallen for a millionaire, she was labeled as a good digger. And a characterless woman. But she had had enough.
'Enough.' Pragya screamed.
'You have achieved what you set out to do, Aaliya. I am leaving this house. But before I go, I think all of you need to hear a few truths.' Pragya said, looking at everyone.
'I feel bad for you Aaliya. That you will never understand what it means to be a woman. That you will never understand what respect actually means. Right now, people respect you because you are some famous celebrity's sister. For all you know, they must be laughing behind your back. I pity you, because you will never know love. Because you don't have it in you to love. The person you claim to love the most, your brother, you will be the reason for the sadness in his life. You don't know how to recognise when someone loves you. I feel bad for you because you will never grow up. You will always be a five years old throwing a tantrum. You don't have to hate me Aaliya. If I am right, you will have no shortage of things to hate in this life.' Pragya whispered, looking in the eyes of a stricken Aaliya.
She turned towards Tanu, whose smirk had faded hearing the words Pragya had spoken to Aaliya.
'You can have him Tanu. You deserve him. You will make quiet a pair. A back stabber and a coward. But be cautious, he is very susceptible to gossip. It will only take one person to fill his ears about you or your alleged affairs and he will be convinced that you are cheating on him. Knowing you, they probably will be true. But remember this, you might have gained the money, but you will never gain security. You will never be able to sleep securely because you know that both of you are insecure in this relationship. Both of you will be vulnerable, which would have been fine if there had been trust. But there isn't, is there Tanu? So both of you will be waiting, for the other one to strike. I can see that it's going to be quite a life.' Pragya said to Tanu, who was looking scared, her victorious smile no where to be seen.
She stopped in front of Abhi, who was looking at her with an expression of fear mixed with longing. Longing for what, she had no idea. And now, she didn't even want to know.
'You know, I read somewhere that who you fall in love with speaks more about you and not that person. That we fall for the love we deserve. And I don't know at what point in my life I convinced myself that this was the sort of love I deserved. That this humiliation and maligning of my character was okay, because you were too naive to understand what was happening around you. I did a great disservice to myself. After a point, women get tired of boys. They need men. A man who can protect them, stand by their side in the trials of life, a partner who is understanding and respectful. But all you are is a boy. Who believes that witches are real. I don't blame you because I fell in love with you. That is on me. You never made any promises. If anything, you reminded me constantly of how much you hate me. But that's the only thing I don't hate you for. I blame you for the insults you heaped on my sister, on the humiliation you meted out to me on a daily basis, for you flaunting you relationship at me on a constant basis. But more than hatred, I feel sorry for you. Because you will never be a man. You will always be a puppet whose strings will be pulled by those around him.' Pragya didn't wait to see Abhi's reaction to her words.
She turned her back to him and went and stood infront of Daadi.
'I have nothing to say to you except thank you. You were the only source of light in this house for me.' Saying that, she bent and touched her feet.
As Pragya crossed the treshhold of Mehra mansion, she didn't know what she would do or where she would go. She only knew that she was lost. And she had finally, finally taken the first step to find herself.
Anupamaa
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