SS : Main Toh Haariyan ( I have lost) Part 2A Page 5 - Page 2

Abhi threw his guitar on the floor and swung his papers filled with wretched nonsensical lyrics for the fifth time in one night. Ever since Pragya left him 2 years ago, there was nothing new added to discography. Producers had stop signing him and he was slowly fading in the industry which led to Tanu's departure from his life. She claimed she couldn't be seen with an unsuccessful singer, it was bad for her career, last he heard she was with some new actor. Oh such love! But that wasn't the point... Abhi left to his balcony, the balcony where Pragya had asked him for the moon, he laughed. That girl was something else. He sadly smiled as he closed his eyes and uttered "Pragya" the name was enough to flash her memories like a cinema reel in front of his eyes. Their nok-jhok, her smart answers, her eyes, her glasses. Everything about her was so beautiful, and boy did it hurt like hell when he came to know of her marriage. It was only a few months after Sarla Aunty had passed away before Pragya's grandmother annonuced her engagement with Arhaan, Arhaan Malhotra. That was said to be Sarla's last wish, for her daughter to marry Arhaan and Abhi had no one to blame it on except himself. Pragya hated him like hell, why? Because Sarla suffered a massive heart attack after overhearing Aaliya speaking to Abhi about leaving Pragya.

"I know I am answerable to many people, especially to Pragya, the one girl who I loved but yet could never have. She blames me for her mother's death and she's right. If Aaliya and I were more careful that would've never happened. Her mother could've been alive... and maybe, just maybe she could've still been in my embrace, like I've always wanted her to be. But her wedding is tomorrow and I've tried with my entire strength to stop it and I can't help but just accept the fact that Pragya is destined to marry Arhaan. And it hurts. It freakin' hurts everytime she smiles when he holds her hand or when they speak of marriage. It hurts when she blushes at the mention of his name but most of all it hurts that he is about to give her the life/love I could never have given her."

With a fallen face, Abhi picked up his guitar once more, he tuned it once more. He strummed on of his favorite tunes...

Apne roothein, paraaye roothein

Yaar roothe naa

Khwaab tootein, waade tootein

Dil ye toote naa

Roothe to khuda bhi roothe

Saath chhoote naa

O Allah Waariyan

O main toh haariyan

O tooti yaariyan mila de oye

This song reminded him so much of her for unforeseen reasons.He was a rockstar and he knew she hated his Happy Love song so much, and out of curiosity he just put together a few lyrics and music to see her reaction one day back when she was with him, but to no avail, she never paid much mind to his music and as much as he acted it didn't affect him.It surely did. He always would act super weird around her and play these different songs in hope that she would commend him one day. Abhi laughed to himself. It wasn't a happy laugh, it was a tearful kind of guilt induced laugh. Maybe if he had sang to her, she would've been here today. Maybe if instead of wasting time chasing Tanu, he had took some time to love her, she would've been here. But the sad truth of Abhishek Mehra's life was that she could never be here, there were only maybes' and if onlys' left in their relationship...

-------

Pragya was put up early to sleep by her nagging family members and all those random aunties she just met. She couldn't sleep though. How could she sleep? Tomorrow she would be marrying again for the second time to a man she could never love. Arhaan was deeply and madly in love with her. Ever since their engagement he took every oppurtunity to spend time with Pragya and held no barriers in verbally expressing his love for his Paro' as he nicknamed her. Pragya hated that name so much! Ever since they had gone to watch a Devdas re-run he has been persistent on calling her Paro' as it was the heroine's nickname which also happened to fit her name. It wasn't like she disliked Arhaan, but she simply could never love again. She sighed as she remembered her days with Abhi, gosh, she was so in love with him. What she felt for Abhi was a passion so deep, a love so strong that was crashed like glass by Abhi himself. She felt extremely guilty and was somewhat upset at herself for loving the man who was responsible for her mother's death but afterall she was marrying Arhaan for her mom. Dadi told Pragya that Sarla's last wish was to see Pragya settled down happily and no other man besides Arhaan could love her like what Sarla wished, according to her Dadi. And there were no questions asked when it came to her mother's last wish, she immediately rushed into an engagement with Arhaan followed by a 1 year of what he called dating' and now it was simply too late. Too late to look back, too late to break the wedding, too late to realize how much she was in love with Abhi... So all she could simply do was sit there and cry. Her life was a mess and there was nothing she could do about it...

________

"Arhaan, please try to understand, Di loves Abhi Jeeju. Don't do this to her."

"I've known Pragya for 3 years now and if she loved him - why wouldn't she tell me Bulbul? This all makes no sense."

"Because of family pressure- Dadi claims that Maa wanted her to marry you and she loved Maa dearly..."

Bulbul pleaded and cried to Arhaan as she begged him to spare her sister of one more misery in life. She knew how dearly Pragya loved Abhi and this marriage was no less of a life sentence for her Di.

"Please, please just think about Di. You love her,na? Wouldn't you want her to be happy?"