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Today's episode was all about parenting - one a successful one and the other a failed one. Gemini (Sabita) once wrote about different parenting style in her comment on one of my posts. Today it's more glaring than ever.
P.S. Dev, tum to kuch din yahan ruk hi jao. Family kaisi hoti hain Boses tumko achhe se sikha degi.
Neha asked a valid question today. Her relationship is the same with Ranveer as Dev's with Sona. Is the difference in husband or wife that makes them behave differently?
Me: Excellent question, Neha. The difference is in husband, wife and parenting. You see, you don't want to make Sona's effort in your relationship, your husband doesn't want to continuously fight an uphill battle like Dev and your family doesn't know how to support their children like the Bose. Had Dev and Sona fought here in Dixit house instead of Bose house, your mother would have ensured their divorce as well.
Ishwari is informed by Neha that Dev would be late. But that wasn't good enough for her. After all who is Neha? She is just a tool to use against Dev when needed and pacified with whatever she wants if she tries to tarnish her Goddess image in front of the family. Dev should have called her directly.
Alternatively, in Bose house, Dev points out to Sona that Elena and Saurabh are fighting but Sona is absolutely indifferent. After all when people live together and love each other, they fight in the open and doesn't backstab each other in private. That's the Bose way.
But for Dev, it was probably an eye opener and he was left feeling as confused as someone who was locked in "Kal Kothri" for years sees sun for the first time.
After dinner, Dev, Saurabh and Bijoy Bose bond over alcohol while Sona stomps away.
So Dev run after her. But Sona hands him his pillow and blanket and ask him to sleep outside.
Now there's again another parallel here from before but with a twist.
When Dev and Sona fought and he ignored her calls choosing to sleep on the couch, Radha blamed Sona.
But here Asha gave up their room for Dev so that he can be comfortable. No one asked him any explanation nor blamed him for anything.
The twist: When Dev was angry before at his home, he never checked to see Sona's comfort.
But today at Sona's house, they were both concerned for each other's comfort.
Yesterday, someone mentioned that a man always feel welcome at a girl's home, but not every girl is lucky enough to feel as welcomed at their in-laws as they are at their own family.
Here's why.
Regardless how upset a wife is with her husband, when he is staying at her parents' home, she still cares for his comfort. She doesn't take his presence for granted.
But thanks to handy excuse of culture, most husband never reciprocates the same for his wife at his home because well, where else would she go?
And when a husband actually reciprocate the same consideration for their wife, looks for her comfort and doesn't take her presence for granted, those are the lucky few women who are as comfortable and welcomed in their in-laws as they are in their own family.
That's the attitude difference that women put up with in the name of tradition bullsh*t.
It's like saying, hey girl, let's make a deal. How about you take all responsibilities since the day you get married, but wait a few decades for your rights and to actually be accepted as a family member? Sounds fair, yes? And we will call this arrangement, tradition and culture to make it a generally unquestioned/uncontested deal that people will blindly follow like sheep.
Anyhoo, moving on. Bijoy Bose kicked them out. Some may call him crazy, I call him smart.
Even drunk he is better parent than sober Ishwari.
He knew that husband and wife should sort out their differences between themselves. And since he can't force Sona to let Dev in, he can ensure that they stay out until they sort out their differences.
Family should intervene only after the couple reach an impasse, not before because no one lives forever. If the couple don't learn how to sort out their problem, what will happen when the parents are no longer alive?
Ishwari however calls as usual hovering.
Bijoy Bose informs her that Dev is staying here.
But that wasn't good enough for her. She expects Dev to stay up at 2 a.m. to cater to her whim and have a chit chat with her. Seriously?
Bijoy Bose informs her that she threw Dev and Sona out to sort out their fights.
Ishwari's concern, "You threw out Dev?"
Bijoy informed her, "Yes, but with Sona."
So let me get it Ishwari, you expected Dev to stay up and pacify your irritating hovering by chatting with you at 2 a.m. but you are worried what he is doing with his wife at 2 a.m. with platinum unlimited credit card and a car at his disposal? I don't know, may be they are starving at the street and are crying for you like Oliver Twist?
The trust Bijoy Bose has on his son-in-law to protect his daughter at 2 a.m. of night, Ishwari doesn't have on her son to take care of himself. She doesn't care at all about Sona.
That's the difference between a successful parenting and a failed parenting.
Ishwari gets offended and keeps asking about Dev and Bijoy replied, "Now you are annoying me. Good night."
Trust me, Mr. Bose, I was feeling the same. High five!!!
Precap: Dev is now puppy following Mrs. Bunny. But their fight continues.
P.S. Dev, tum to kuch din yahan ruk hi jao. Family kaisi hoti hain Boses tumko achhe se sikha degi.
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
