The Dixit Sisters: A Vindication

Yes, they reacted very differently to Natasha's proposal, beccause it was predictable and totally within the bounds of comprehension. Dev was his usual, taciturn self, primarily concerned with business, and Ishwari was clued in every step of the way, though she took a truly hands-off approach. The "adults" had the situation under control so Nikki and Rhea were free to be childish about it, and since it was a simple, textbook arranged marriage situation, and the interactions between Dev and Natasha were only superficial, the sisters also followed the usual superficial cliches of teasing and making fun. The whole family entered this uncharted territory with Dev and got to be on that journey alongside him.

With Sona, it's completely different. By the time the family found out, Dev's feelings for were already much more than superficial. He took his time to build a very deep intimacy and comfort with Sona, to enjoy the new experiences he was having with her, to embrace the new happiness she brought into his life without complications. I don't fault him at all for taking that time, but then he turned around expected his family to catch up to his level of intimacy immediately. Don't they also need time to process the new information? Instead, they are confronted with one tense situation after another, prompted by Dev's over-eagerness.

It also doesn't help that Dev, who has always isolated himself from his sisters and thought of himself as their caretaker, now wants to have a normal sibling relationship, as evidenced by his vision of the photography session. He may have changed because of his relationship with Sona, becoming more open to fun, but he hasn't shared any of that process with his sisters. To them, he has continued to be their aloof, workaholic brother who doesn't really talk to them about anything real in his life. So if today they are confused about how to react, it's not because they are selfish or because they don't care about Dev's happiness. It's because they are much more acutely aware of the complications this raises. Unlike Dev, they are not blind to their mother's dissatisfaction and know how much havoc it can wreak. Nikki or Rhea commenting on, or teasing the two during the photography session could have exacerbated the tension that was already apparent. By being cautious and observant of Ishwari, they are in fact trying to protect Dev's feelings as much as his mother's in the long run.

This is especially true of Neha. Once again we were reminded today that nobody understands the family the way she does. Neha immediately knows that this situation is more complicated than anybody realises, because she is the only one who sees through Ishwari's facade of unwavering mahaanta, to her personal desires and weaknesses. She thought through Dev's relationship with Sona the same way she thought through her own with Ranveer, masking none of the practical concerns in favour of romance. It's all well and good that Dev is in love, but until Ishwari approves with her whole heart, Neha knows that there is no point... nobody can truly be happy, especially not Dev. It was amazing to watch the sisters have an honest and open conversation, with Neha teaching her sisters by example how to be honest about these complex issues.

Dev's exclusion from such discussion is both telling and sad. Ishwari taught Neha to navigate emotional complexity by putting her in a terrible position from a young age, and now Neha is passing that lesson on to her sisters. Dev was excluded from these lessons then because, according to Ishwari, as a the sole male family member, it was only necessary for him to focus on earning money. He is excluded from these lessons now because of his inability to see Neha as an equal in the household -- a direct result of the privilege Ishwari gave him. Sona is the first person who demanded emotional maturity from Dev, the only person he can turn to with his doubts, confusion, and vulnerability, and he has come to depend on that, but there is no way she can take the lead when it comes to his family so poor Dev is left to lead from ignorance and naivete. The same propensity for proactive decisions and fast results, which serve him so well in business, are putting his relationships at great risk.

So don't blame the sisters for being wary, they are just doing what they have always done and have been trained to do: wordlessly understand and navigate the complications so that Ishwari and Dev can maintain their "ideal relationship."

Thanks! So glad you enjoyed the post and felt it expressed your perspective! 😃

Aw, thanks! 😳 I just write what I feel about the characters, and hope that others are willing to see my point of view!

Exactly! You managed to say in two quotes what it took me that whole post to express 😆 I think even Nikki, the baby of the family, usually sheltered from everything has sensed Ishwari's displeasure. The scene with the bedsheets was probably not there by accident. Nikki may not understand exactly what is going on, but I think thanks to Neha, she is mature enough to see that she should be more careful with her words and actions in this case.

Thanks so much! I think for Dev to become like Neha and learn to fight for what he wants, he has to see Ishwari as a mere human woman, the way Neha does. As long as he has her on a pedestal, equal to God, he won't be able to cross her. If they bring the Khatri angle back, I think it will play a big role in Dev's achievement of balance and sensitivity.