ah, finally found it!! i see that it's got huge coverage and lots of people pitching in. all of whom have probably got all bases covered. and i've got to pack a suitcase for a week in half an hour. but being the obnoxious write-huge-posts know-it-all, i've just
got to pitch in! 😆
prem "annoying and wrong", eh? hmm.
i, of course,
totally understand the "annoying" bit! prem
is annoying, he is. i've been saying it all along, and no-one has ever listened to me -- prem is annoying!
but i'm afraid i don't understand the "wrong" bit. 'cause i've never seen him being wrong -- which, of course, is annoying, in itself! 😆 hate prem! 🤣
it's annoying how all his life he's gathered the love of all those around him, blooming annoying. whether it is his younger brothers -- i mean, c'mon, do younger brothers really end up loving like that?? -- or his sisters. or his step-mom. or his father. or his employees. or the sister of his one-true love. whatever. it's darned annoying.
it's
annoying how, once he finds himself in an impossible dilemma - to be the best son, or the best lover - he painfully examines it from all angles. chooses what he wants to be - and guess what? it's to be both! it's annoying how he is constantly pulled from both angles and how the human being in him helplessly
has to respond to love both. and he remains true to his ideals, and his thoughts, to the best of his human capacity and tries to do the best to both. and it's annoying 'cause it's like a finger wagging in my face saying "nyaaah, i'm actually doing it!" it's bloody annoying how we all just
know that we can't have our cake and eat it too. but to the very end, when it was impossible for him to do otherwise, prem
tries to the best of his human ability to see whether he cannot beat the odds! it's the human thing to see the inevitable future, choose one outcome and abandon the other. even though the two outcomes might be
equally beloved. what is totally annoying about prem is that he
fights like a man possessed, a dreamy-eyed demon, against having to make that choice till the very last end. and when he does make the choice, it's not just a weak, wishy-washy, leave some loopholes open so that we-can-renegotiate-later kind of a choice. it's with fire in his eyes and thunder in his voice, so that no-one can doubt the absoluteness of his intentions. and even when the fire was doused by tears and the thunder shattered to whispers, he is just as clear that he
hasn't abandoned the other choice. i watched in total disbelief when even then he is fighting to "have his cake and eat it too.
bloody annoying it is that prem remains true to his essence -- he defines new dimensions of what love is and stands by all those dimensions. he redraws the borders what a person can do for a love,
any love that he has nurured and worshipped, be it for all his life, or during the most recent phase of his growing up. and i agree - the fact that he struggles and struggles for that love to win, even when it is
clear to all of us that it is a lost cause, is just plain annoying, damnit! why can't he be human, make a choice and then focus on just what he chose? why - even after he has
said "mein bhagwan nehi hoo" - does he have to act the opposite? why must he try these divine deeds of making everything work. that world doesn't exist. we believe it cannot exist. and anyone who fights for it is .... annoying. it is annoying, damnit. i agree. i hate prem.
but to call it wrong? that i cannot find it in my mind, my soul to do. i know the world is full of choices. where i think the worst, the scariest part is that there is no perfect choice. all choices have some things that are right, some things that are not-so right. and we become human when we struggle to figure out which fits best.
faced with such choices in front of us, i think that anyone who fights against the odds, who sees that there is no such thing as a "best" choice, who feels that "love is a many-splendoured thing" from the bottom of his being, who - yes - struggles to have his cake and eat it too, is not wrong. in fact, i think that this is what it means to be a hero. at the end of the day, what is remarkable about prem is that he is like us in landing up in a tough spot. (i remember, someone (sshisham?) mentioned a real-life situation of knowing somone in such situations of love vs. family and end up making a choice, abandoning the other and being sad.) but he is my hero, because i would like to follow,, any day what prem is doing: not giving up on his father-love and staying with his heart-love. yes, having his cake and eating it too. i wouldn't be honest if i said that i would just love to be able to do that. i don't think that it'd be easy - 'cause there aren't that many cases of people being able to do it. but if i believe deeply enough, i think that i should be able to fight hard enough to be able to do it. and prem isn't wrong beceause he knows, he feels it from the bottom of himself. and he fights for it with every breath. that just cannot be wrong. nope, it can't.
i often wonder why people choose one path or the other, when both choices are terrific. like wanting to do a phd in english literature and biomedical engineering. and then i figure it's because we don't have the soul-energy to do both. but there are people - precious few - who have done not just one, but two, or three phds. i've always heard that it's difficult having a wife and a mistress (or a husband and a lover for a woman). but ... what if there are people who can put so much love that both are satisfied totally? is that impossible? we are all socially engineered to hate the idea of multiple lovers. what is brilliant about this story is that the two lovers are not two women in prem's life, but heer and his father. it's still difficult for us to believe that it's even possible for one person to have the soul-energy to do justice to both. i think this is the first time that we are seeing someone try - to the limits of his capability. and i think what prem is trying is wonderful.
and i don't think that's wrong. my problem is that because he's only human. and because he is right in trying to fight to keep his cake and eat it too (c'mon, which of us wouldn't want to be able to do that??? seriously, now!). he makes me wonder why i should not do the same in that situation. he pushes me to want to fight against the odds too, whether i have the capacity or the soul-energy or not. he makes me want to find out if i can. and it's bloody annoying, damnit! 😡
do i have to say it?
i totally hate annoying, morally and absolutely right, mein-bhagwan-nehi-hoon prem. 😆
Edited by estee - 17 years ago
Debate Mansion
