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Addicted
Once upon a time in la la land...he had some peace of mind (if you can call it that). If peace of mind meant ignoring your so-called mother's coldness, your dysfunctional family and not sleeping peacefully most of the time then yes, he had peace of mind.
Music and Fab 5 were more than enough to make up for every lack he had in his life. He was happy.
He can't say that he was 'sad' now, but he was definitely not at 'peace'. Sleep seems to have broken up with him completely, but somehow he wanted his nights to be longer despite that. Why? Because this was probably the only time when he would be able to see her without having to blink!
He closes his eyes every time to conjure up images of her. The way she smiles, the way she pouts, the way her nose scrunches up cutely when she's angry, the way her jet-black mane adorns her beautiful face...he could admire it all and smile to himself while lying down on his bed trying to sleep without the fear of getting caught.
The worst part was- he wasn't even complaining. Even in his mind he has stopped blaming her for stealing his peace of mind. What good will it do, anyway?
He knew he was addicted to her. His 'Dear Nandu'.
All he could do these days was waiting to see her face first thing in the morning and wait for night to come so that he could be alone with her- in his thoughts at least.
He didn't even realize when his obsession with her reached new heights, take a whole new turn and become something deeper! So deep was she seated in his heart and mind that it scared him even.
Where did this come from? This strong urge to claim her as his'? Since when did lusting after her became his favourite hobby? Since when did the behaviour of his hormones became alarming?
When he saw her in his bedroom, sleeping peacefully, he didn't even wait to debate whether she was there for real or it was just a fragment of his imagination. He just knew its her! That's the way his senses worked these days when it concerns Nandini- he just knows it when she's around.
He wanted to laugh seeing her all flustered and embarrassed to see him shirtless! Her innocence amused him at times. May be it was her innocence which came as a breath of fresh air for him-something he so badly wanted to explore right now- all by himself, bit by bit.
How he'd cursed himself for calling Cabir at his place when all he wanted was to be alone with his Nandu? How he'd gotten pissed with Mukti for barging into his room when all he wanted was to let his eyes feast on the beauty that was there standing before him in his clothes!
He tried putting his thoughts into actions- not once but repeatedly- only to be rejected by this child woman every time to whom he has gotten addicted!
Only someone like her could reject him- Maanik Malhotra- when he's literally offering himself in a platter for her. It was beyond frustrating!
But somewhere...deep, deep down inside, the possessive man in him was smirking in victory! It was just too obvious that this genius in science never had a boyfriend. Her very first kiss was with him!
He remembers telling Dhruv that he'll take that punch over that kiss any day. The present situation seemed like a mockery of that statement! How he wished that he had a time-turner so that he'd go back to that kiss and make it last longer...much longer!
This was maddening to say the least! All he could do these days was fantasize about her whereas the object of his addiction was blissfully oblivious. How he envied her peace of mind!
Even bouts of cold shower did little to dampen his libido. All he could do was imagine her with him under the shower all over again.
She was there present in everything he owned. Right from his car to his house, his room, his clothes, his bed, his couch...even his cupboard!
She was slowly, but surely driving him crazy- and he wasn't complaining.
Okkk...I know I can't equal my own work 'My brand of heroin' even if I try! For me, it was probably my best work on MaNan! 😃
This is a sort of sequel to it.
Do read and let me know how it is?
Tum Se Tum Tak
