AkhDa FF- Pyaar Kiya Toh Nibhana *NEW Author's Note* Page 65 - Page 9

Update plz..My darling Azi.. I am dying to know the story ahead!!😛😛😭

Originally posted by: SShreShthA

sorryyy for troubling u...😊😊

luv u yaar sooo much...🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

Thanx in Advance...😃

Aww...My Azi..I love u yar.. Yippiee..Waiting for the update!!🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗 Love u shrestha di...🤗🤗🤗

Originally posted by: ..Tahniat..

Aaj 29th hai!

Han..aaj 29th hai..aur shayad humein 5 baje tak update milni wali thi...😭😭😭

Originally posted by: PrincessNany

Han..aaj 29th hai..aur shayad humein 5 baje tak update milni wali thi...😭

Originally posted by: SShreShthA

hey tahni ne Destiny wali update ki h...

go n hv look i simply love it yaar...and precap is more interesting...bt hv to wait becoz of others...

go n checkout...

Ohh!! Sorry I dodnt check that...Thanks di..n sorry Tahni..yar/.I just returned from Shopping..njoyed a lot.. i'll just check out!!😛😛😛

Originally posted by: ..Tahniat..

Azi update!

Yes...UPDATE...UPDATE!!!😛😛😛

Hello my lovelies!!!🤗I got good news and bad news... The good new is I finished the chapter!!! I'll edit and send within the hour😛😛😛... The bad news is.. It's absolutely horrible🤢🤢🤢 I hate it... But I keep my promises... It's on it's way!!!😳😳

Originally posted by: Az3003

Hello my lovelies!!!🤗I got good news and bad news... The good new is I finished the chapter!!! I'll edit and send within the hour😛😛😛...Th e bad news is.. It's absolutely horrible🤢🤢🤢 I hate it... But I keep my promises... It's on it's way!!!😳😳

Disclaimer Applies

Chapter 1

There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness.'- Friedrich Nietzsche

His head throbbed. He felt strangely disconnected from his body. His mind drifted while his limbs felt like lead. There was darkness all around. There could be nothing left but darkness... He called for her... Jodha...He needed her like a dying man needed his breath. He fumbled in the darkness praying for her light to guide him. He tried to move but his body wouldn't obey. He suddenly realised though, that perhaps floating into oblivion was not such a bad thing. There was no pain here, no reality. Here she was as real as he wanted her to be... And she would always be by his side. She would never leave him. Here he could see her wherever and whenever he wished. 'I love you Shehensha...' Her voice, as sweet as honey, seemed to echo all around him. He still remembered how his heart had skipped a beat on hearing it. She stood in front of him, her bright eyes framed by her long hypnotic lashes. Whenever she had looked at him like that, time would come to a standstill. It was one of the reasons why he had always felt so wary around her, she had an effect on him, and he used to punish her for that. Her beauty was a curse. He had decided long ago that she would pay for pointing that sword at him in the Amer prison. And she would pay with her life... For the rest of her life...

His body began to heat up. What's happening to me?! He thought. He saw her then, as clear as day in front of him. She wore a emerald green Sari, decked in all her finery. She had worn it just for him. Jodha held her arms out to him in comfort. She smiled at him reassuringly. 'Come to me Shehensha... I'll take all your pain away...' He practically wept with relief as he ran into her waiting arms. But as he got closer he saw her floating further away from him. Her comforting arms being pulled back. 'I'll take it all with me... Aapka bhoj, aapke saare gham. You always said that I was a curse hain na Shehensha? I'll go away, I'll leave you forever. I only want you to be happy Shehensha.' She smiled bitterly at him, her voice hitched as she sobbed. She had spent many a night weeping for him. He saw her soft lips quiver as a tiny sliver of blood dripped from them. He had slapped her there. Her eyes were shining with unshed tears and her chest heaved in sorrow. Her heart bled, not just figuratively from his cruelty but literally as well. Her heart had met a blade for him. He heard the treacherous sound of metal searing flesh. 'Jodha!' He screamed...

His chest began to ache. He couldn't breathe. He was having a panic attack. He could feel it. He was suffocating. As his head pounded he imagined how she must have felt when he had back-handed her. As his breath caught in his throat he remembered how he had choked her. As he struggled to move his arms all he could think of was how helpless and delicate her arms had been, trapped in his cage-like grip. His dead limbs were starting to come alive. He didn't want to remember all that. He'd die if he had to relive it but maybe this was his punishment, to relive her pain as his own. To watch the love of his life suffer by his very hands over and over again. The sedatives clouded his mind. They shackled him to his suffering and try as he might to claw his way out, all he could see was her blood, her tears. All he could hear were her pleas, her broken sobs and her blood-curdling screams. The agony was overwhelming and all he could do was wait until her memories drove him completely insane.

Then, just as it came, the darkness was suddenly overshadowed by a blinding light. He looked around and he was in his chambers. Jodha laid on his bed. She was a picture of ethereal beauty. She had an other-worldly glow and she smiled a secret smile, it was the smile of a girl who had just become a woman. She had blossomed under his gentle touch. Jalal had smiled sadistically. It was time to pluck the pretty little petal and crush her into the dirt beneath his shoes...

Jodha stirred slowly, stretching her aching muscles as the sun kissed her skin. She opened her eyes slowly. Her doe-like orbs glowing as they basked in the light's glory. Jalal's heart skipped a beat. He chided himself angrily for wanting her. This woman had to know magic. She had cast a spell on him with her bewitching beauty and her sharp tongue. After three months of marriage he had finally wooed her into his bed. He was almost sad that the time had passed. Last night was more fun than he had imagined. He wanted to ravish her again, but he reigned himself in. What he was about to do to her would give him more pleasure than any night in bed with her. 'Salaam Jodha Begum. Did you sleep well?' An innocent sweet smile lit her gorgeous face. Her smile was almost Jalal's undoing.How does she do it? He wondered bitterly. She had just spent the night so brazenly in his arms. He had seen so much of her womanly form that it would have even made Ruqaiyya blush. The very same Ruqaiyya whose body had warmed this very bed many a nights over the years. She had melted under his touch. She felt so at home in his arms that he had wondered for a fleeting second whether he had been the only man in her life. All his doubts had vanished as he gently broke the threshold of her virginity. He rejoiced. He had won. He hadn't had to take her dignity by force because she had offered herself to him on a silver platter. It had been hard work winning her over but she had given him so much of pleasure that last night alone more than made up for it...

As she had slept he had wondered whether it would be so bad to keep up a physical relation with her. No! He stopped himself. I will obliterate her. Her pride, her honour, I'll destroy it all...

He smirked evilly. She was a woman now yet her innocence and beauty were still beyond compare. 'Ya Allah only you know why you have created her... A beautiful misplaced puzzle. I had solved it with so much of care and tenderness. It's time to break the pretty picture to pieces.' Jodha coyly straightened her dupatta. The bed had felt so empty without him...

Love is a trap. When it appears, we see only its light, not its shadows.'- Paulo Coelho

Jalal opened his arms, beckoning her. Jodha teared up with joy as she lifted herself lightly off the bed, wishing to shelter herself in his powerful embrace. Poor Jodha had no idea that this was her last moment of happiness. It took all of Jalal's self-control not to laugh out loud at her naivete and her foolishness. She had trusted him. An enemy. The minute Jodha was about to wrap her arms around him, he lifted his arm and slapped her so hard that she fell over and hit her head on the floor...

He had laughed manically. 'You know for someone who claims to come from a clan of warriors you really have a hard time differentiating friend from foe Jodha Begum...' She looked up at him in shock. 'Sh...Shehensha what are you saying? You said you loved me! I.. I thought we..' 'Oh shut up woman.' He cut her off. 'I always knew you were foolish, but even I was surprised at how gullible and stupid you are. I could never love a Rajput wretch like you. I could never love period! I said all those things to get you into my bed and you offered yourself to me like a cheap wh**re. Tum ek Begum nahin, bazaar mein bhikni wali cheez ho.' Jodha could only shiver in shock. She couldn't believe what was happening. His chest ached suddenly as he looked into her anguished eyes. What's happening to me? He thought. He could practically see Jodha shatter into a million pieces before his eyes... 'But I love you Shehensha... Puri tarah se hochuki hoon mein tumhaari. Sab kuch de diya hain maine tumhe Shehensha... If you hate me so much kill me... But please tell me that this is a lie!' Jodha wept brokenly in front of him. She stood up and held his hand. 'Just get out!' He had told her ruthlessly. He flung her away in disgust. Jodha's eyes widened. 'H...how can I? I.. In this state?' Her clothes were tattered and her body still bore the signs of their passionate love-making. He grinned at her humiliation. "Shehensha you are joking right? You are testing me, my love for you. Shehensha I love you, truly, honestly. I can't live without you! I have given you all I have to give...' She cried. He took his shawl and wrapped it around her. 'Jaaiye Jodha Begum... Back to the Harem with all the other old clothes. Let them see you coming in wearing my shawl. Let them see my victory...' He cackled as her eyes widened. She trembled. She was completely defeated, her pride and honour, all gone. 'No! Nahin! Jodha!!!' Jalal woke with a start. His body was wracked with tremors and his head throbbed...

'Shehensha?! You're awake? Allah ka lakh lakh shukr hain!' Said the Hakim who had kept a vigil by his bedside. He turned to the guard... 'Malika-E-Aazam ko bulaiye! Shehensha ko hosh aagaya hain!' Hamida Bano was there in a flash. 'Jalal aap theek toh hain na? Please don't ever do that again! Aapko humari kasam!' She caressed his hair soothingly. 'Jodha Begum kahan hai?' Jalal asked in a flat tone. Hamida looked at him in shock. Jalal turned to her, his eyes wild... 'Bataiye Ammijaan... Kahan hai Jodha Begum?! Woh theek toh hain na?' Hamida held onto his shoulders. 'Jalal... Look at me beta... You can't run away from the truth. Jodha Begum mar chuki hain!' Jalal tried to look away. He couldn't bear to see the pain in her eyes. 'Accept it Jalal! While you were asleep we were preparing her funeral! Now that you are awake we can perform her last rites.' Jalal turned to her in shock. 'I'll do no such thing!' He said stubbornly. Hamida slapped him hard across his face. Her slap was nothing compared to the painful accusations that she began to hurl at him...'Congratulations Jalal... You've won. You've got no-one to blame but yourself for her death!' Hamida cried. 'Don't act like she means anything to you!' Hamida yelled at him. A lone tear slipped down Jalal's cheek. 'I love her Ammijaan' He whispered. Hamida scoffed. 'You aren't capable of love Jalal! You are a beast! No-one could have destroyed a soul as pure, beautiful and innocent as Jodha but you managed to do the impossible. You spurned the love of a woman who was willing to do anything for you Jalal! You may be the Shehensha. You may be the wealthiest, the handsomest, the most powerful yet I have never seen a more unfortunate man than you! You lost the one person who truly loved you Jalal. The one woman who was willing to wipe your tears and ease your pain, yet you were the reason for all her misery! If you really loved her, give her a send-off fit for a Queen. She is after all... Mariam-Uz-Zamani...' Despite her sorrow, the fact that her Jodha was Marium-Uz-Zamani was a matter of great pride for Hamida Bano. 'I... I can't... How can I light her pyre?' Jalal looked so lost, so broken, so fragile. 'You have no choice Jalal.' Hamida said with finality. 'I have sent word to Amer along with our sincerest apologies that we will conduct the funeral in their absence. She was in such a bad state that we need to conduct the funeral as soon as possible...' Hamida's voice hitched. Jalal clenched his fists against the pain. She had suffered right until the end... For him... For their son. He knew that he would never forgive himself as long as he lived...

The priest explained the rituals to Jalal. He was completely oblivious to all around him. People from all over the Sultanate came to pay their respects and give their condolences. Jalal felt like a ghost amongst them. Neither living nor dead. He was numb with shock and grief. He had felt pain when he had seen his Badi Ammi's true colours, he had wept like a child after his Khan Baba's death, but his grief for the woman he loved was more than his body could bear. He had just shut down completely. He performed the rituals in a trance as the priests chanted their mantras. He then mechanically led the Janaazah salaah but the hardest part was yet to come. 'Phupasa...' Maan Singh put a shaky hand on his shoulder. 'I am proud of my Buasa. And I know the entire Amer will forever be able to raise its head in pride for giving birth to a warrior like her. For a man, it is most honourable to die in battle but for a woman, there can be no higher honour than giving her life for her husband and children. My little cousin is very lucky. Jodha Buasa is a martyr...' Jalal's eyes misted up. Maan Singh had only arrived during Jodha's labour. He was completely unaware of the circumstances surrounding her pregnancy and her death. If Maan Singh had even a clue what his Jodha Buasa had suffered he would have shed blood. Jalal had half a mind to tell him. He secretly wished Maan Singh would put him out of his misery and behead him in the Diwaan-E-Khaas. But then he heard his little boy wail in Ruqaiyya's arms. Ruqaiyya would not meet his eyes. He hadn't even taken a decent look at his son yet. All who had done so had immediately fallen in love with the little Shehzade. They said he had the face of an angel. He had his mother's eyes. Maan Singh squeezed Jalal's shoulders in quiet support and handed him the burning torch. Jalal looked at him in desperation. He couldn't do this... Atgah Khan came to help. He and Maan Singh led the traumatised Jalal to the waiting pyre and made him ignite the wood. Jalal stared at the wooden panels as the fire began to catch. He held on to the wood... To his Jodha... He begged Allah for a miracle. He held fast but a fire does not discriminate between the living and the dead, between a Shehensha and a Fakir. It just eats anything in its path. As the fire moved closer to where Jalal crouched with his head down, Atgah and Maan Singh had to yank him away. Jalal's body burned along with the pyre and a deadly fever gripped his weak body. The trauma of watching his love burn was too much and his knees buckled. He prayed to Allah for his Jodha then everything went black...

The mourning and sorrow had spread throughout the palace. Jodha had touched everyone in the short time that she had been there. No matter how many sorrows she had faced, she always had time to help others and smile for them. The Harem women could not even bring themselves to be happy. Jalal, their Shehensha was completely shattered. It was during this bleak time, in a dark secret room in the hidden passageways of the Agra palace that Jodha's eyes fluttered open...

I am completely horrified and I apologise for this chapter.😭 I wrote it in a rush. I promise I'll pay more attention after my exams. 😭I'm sorry everyone but I just wanted to give you something before I go on hiatus. I'll accept the chappals and rotten vegetables for this one. I'm sorry...

Thank you Aanchal!! 🤗And I'm sorry for this😭