OS: His Wife's Keeper

DonnaHarvey thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#1
"It's dark out", the veiled man mumbled his words under his niqaab.
"I know", she whispered adjusting the pleats of his salwar. The Afghani cotton sitting pretty on his skin made her heart jump a bit. Even if he wasn't Jalal, he came close to the man at times. Times like tonight- if the light was dim enough and their bodies close to exhaustion, she could close her eyes and imagine Jalal standing in her embrace. She rested her head on his chest and looked up knowingly.
"There's a reason I call you out at dark", her playful fingers were dipping a little too low on his hips. A smile tugging on the corner of his lips, he let have her way; but not before satiating his burning curiosity.
"You still love him. You still long for him. And if Jodha gives him away in khairaat one day, you will be the first beggar at her door. You will plead with your arch nemesis for Jalal. Isn't that right?"
Her lips halted on top of his stubble. Her hot breathing stilled on his neck as contemplated the meaning of his words. Without wincing, she replied within the second, "I am not alone in the ill-fated endevour of love. If your unrequited pains for my eunuch say anything, you feel the same pain as me. Love, no matter for a man, woman, or neither, is the same love. And worse yet, the same hurt".

He had learned long ago that she didn't judge him for being different. How could she when she was known as the woman who willingly let her husband go...into the arms of another woman? Now she was the miserable first wife and he the one-sided lover both fated to be alone. But neither would accept their fate, not without a fight.
"Yes, I still love her", he said referring to Hoshiar as a woman. "and you him. But our loves left us long ago. Now it's just me keeping you warm at night".
As his long arms engulfed her frame snug and tight, she realized life was a little more worth living with a keeper around. The bloodstains of an old flame died underneath his new light. Maybe someday he would be good enough to fill the hole in her heart but for now, his strength covering the one in her bed was good enough.

Short piece on Rukaiya (complete). I sympathize with this woman a whole lot. Just wondering how she would deal with the loneliness once it truly dawns on her that Jalal is long gone. The Hoshiar aspect was something I thought of as I went along. Everyone needs love- all of us.
Edited by DonnaHarvey - 11 years ago

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DonnaHarvey thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#2
jees you all show ruq some lovin'.😆
..Shweta.. thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#3
I mean it's written really well and I think it makes creative sense. But I mean just as a Shweta this is giving me sort of strange mental images.
I... Good job? I don't know.
DonnaHarvey thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#4

Originally posted by: -ForeverYours-

I mean it's written really well and I think it makes creative sense. But I mean just as a Shweta this is giving me sort of strange mental images.

I... Good job? I don't know.

Thank you. Well, sort of.
I would really like to hear the opinion of a Shweta. Do tell what you mean because I don't understand. Is it too forward? uncomfortable? SPILL!
..Shweta.. thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#5

Originally posted by: DonnaHarvey

Thank you. Well, sort of.
I would really like to hear the opinion of a Shweta. Do tell what you mean because I don't understand. Is it too forward? uncomfortable? SPILL!


For a Shweta- uncomfortable. But that doesn't mean we stop producing creativity that Shweta as a person wouldn't enjoy...so much. I mean as a creative person, I sort of think it's cool. But I mean... Hoshiyaar? And Rukaiya? Vat is this.
DonnaHarvey thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#6

Originally posted by: -ForeverYours-

For a Shweta- uncomfortable. But that doesn't mean we stop producing creativity that Shweta as a person wouldn't enjoy...so much. I mean as a creative person, I sort of think it's cool. But I mean... Hoshiyaar? And Rukaiya? Vat is this.

f**k no!
not hoshiyar and rukaiya. hoshiyar's lover and rukaiya. how did we get here?
Not that there is anything wrong with an eununch and a woman dating but with hoshiyar and ruk, there definitely is because of the nature of their relationship. read again. I really hope I made that clear or else this is a disaster.

DonnaHarvey thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#7

Originally posted by: -ForeverYours-

For a Shweta- uncomfortable. But that doesn't mean we stop producing creativity that Shweta as a person wouldn't enjoy...so much. I mean as a creative person, I sort of think it's cool. But I mean... Hoshiyaar? And Rukaiya? Vat is this.

THANK YOU. Ignoring at bold that is because I really didn't write that.
..Shweta.. thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#8

Originally posted by: DonnaHarvey

f**k no!
not hoshiyar and rukaiya. hoshiyar's lover and rukaiya. how did we get here?
Not that there is anything wrong with an eununch and a woman dating but with hoshiyar and ruk, there definitely is because of the nature of their relationship. read again. I really hope I made that clear or else this is a disaster.


Hoshiyaar has a lover?
Jaisoif thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#9
Wow I really liked it, especially the line where it said all love is the same and worse the hurt from it is the same, wonderfully written, and I'm glad there's an os written from Ruquaiyas perspective, good job!!!
DonnaHarvey thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#10

Originally posted by: -ForeverYours-


Hoshiyaar has a lover?

you ought to read this again and carefully.



long story short, rukaiya and hoshiyar's lover are intimate because they both can't have what they want i.e. jalal and hoshiyar respectively. we don't know the veiled man's identity other than his relationship with hoshiyar and now rukaiya.

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