'It's my own fault and sheer stupidity' Nachiket whispered slowly, as he looked at the retreating figure of his wife, who was furiously wiping off the tears with the back of her hand, as she made her way towards the open enclosure where the children were playing.
The warm tears chilled against his skin; he realised that he was crying now. He realised how much he had hurt Ragini this time around, even worse than what he had done in the past, if at all. He had not risen up to the occasion when they were trying desperately to re-frame their lives together.
Wiping his tears off, he got up from the bench gingerly and walked towards the car. The children were already bundled inside, Ragini was sitting at the middle, totally engrossed with Tanya - Nachiket sighed. The seat beside the driver had been kept vacant for him, he knew.
Dropping Tanya off, they returned to the Hotel, tired and sleepy. The children wished their parents Good Night and retired to their shared rooms; while Ragini stayed back with the kids for a while, Nachiket went straight to his room. He knew he had his work cut out - after all, it was his mistake. He should have treated Ragini with respect and as an equal.
After an hour or so, Ragini went up to their room, emotionally upset to the core. Her anger had subsided by now, but she felt bereft. She could not believe that Nachiket had kept such an important issue away from her, while they were actually trying to get back to each other.
She entered the room, to find it dim, lit only by the light from the bathroom. She looked all around to decide on an alternate place to sleep. And then she noticed it.
He had still not changed; though he seemed to have loosened his tie. A near empty bottle of whisky stood forlorn on the table, by the side of the bed. The glass rested clean and clear by the bottle.
He had drunk straight from the bottle; she realised that he had actually drunk himself to sleep, one of his legs propped up on top of the comforter while the other rested partially on the ground.
He had drunk himself to sleep after so many months, Ragini knew.
Her heart broke and she wept piteously for both of them. She knew that he needed her support, and here she was pushing him away. of course, she was angry and she had every reason to be, but she did not know how to deal with this now. Not anymore.
She climbed up on the bed as quietly as she could and lay down beside him, trying to breathe evenly. After a while, she edged closer to him and gently whisked the tie off. Moving even closer, she lay her head down on his chest, her arm hugging him tightly as she listened to him breathing in and out.
She knew that life had blessed them again.
Lulled by his even breathing, she fell asleep soon, dreaming about him fooling around, cracking jokes, making her laugh, chasing her around the house, kissing her, playing with the children, and promising her that he would never ever leave her alone.