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Me, Khushi Gupta, the most polite and fun loving person, has now no politeness left in me. Sarcasm has nestled deep inside me and now I am happy being known as the heartless sarcastic bitch. Sorry if it sound offending but that's what I am or say that's what he has turned me into. He.. Arnav Singh Raizada, the hot shot guy, the heart throb of our university and most importantly.. the reason of my crushed, broken, shattered heart. Like uhh what's his name.. Uh Edward Cullen.. Edward Cullen was the blood sucking creature, mostly known as vampire in The Twilight series and here, this guy, Arnav Singh Raizada is the emotion sucking creature of my life. Yes I know it may sound oh so stupid but that's what the truth is. I have left no emotions inside me.. Neither pain nor happiness or anything and this is all because of him as he had literally sucked out all the emotions one possess from me. I just don't feel anything these days and thus sometimes I think I am a non living thing that breathes.. Jeez!!! What am I saying?? How can a non-living thing breathe? But then I don't know what I am anymore. So well.. Whatever!!
I still remember that day, the first day I entered into the gates of this very university and the first thing I saw was a boy and a girl kissing each other madly.. "They must be so in love" I thought but what I knew later left me feeling all disgusted. The guy was kissing that girl just because his friend had dared him to.. Well you guy must have guessed whom the guy was, yeah?? No? oh okay so lemme tell ya all.. Arnav Singh Raizada was the guy. And the next day his friends had again dared him. Dared him to kiss me.. I clearly remember how he had walked to me and said, "Arnav Singh Raizada doesn't kiss cry babies or these nervous looking chicks. I have an image dude, I wont spoil it kissing this girl who seems to have no guts. " Had it not been something big as kissing I would have shown him how much guts I beheld but as it was something I couldn't do I decided to stay quiet. But this guy was clearly insulting me, I couldn't stay back without saying anything, could I?? so I spoke up, " I also don't like being kissed by a creepy loser as you. Me and my first kiss or anything is reserved for a good and deserving guy unlike you. " and walked away from there. That was my mistake I guess. I should have just walked away not saying a damn word but I just couldn't control myself when this effin' guy was saying something which hurt my ego.
Three weeks later we were chosen as partners for the "marketing skills" project and even after pleading Ms. Pamela for umpteenth time for changing the partner I got no good response. And then it all began. With you apologizing and later the sweet behaviors which followed. Blinded I was for sure and now I am cursing myself for acting so. Had I thought a bit wisely then today I would not have been in this mess. My live would have been as easy as it used to be. If only things could change.. Sigh!! Those two weeks of project and I was lost myself to you. I did the biggest mistake and gave my heart to you taking an advantage of which you showered me more with the fakeness.. Those comforting hugs and the soft kisses on my forehead when I got hyper and you had to cool me down, those flirty little kisses on my cheeks and those loving yet passionate kisses on my lips.. all fake. F.A.K.E!!! The world you pushed me into was itself so fake and forget about those all, you yourself were so fake. And me being way too blinded got more and more drowned into the fakeness.. But though you did this all I am glad you stopped at the correct time before I lost it all to you. Had you not put an end then I would have surely killed myself for what you did but I am glad though being so fake you did have this courtesy. And this was the only good thing you did to me.
All was good until that day when I came to know this all was just a bet. A bet you had with your friends for showing how wrong I was in saying you're not worth it in front of those 20 students present in the university ground. I was broken, I was shattered until the last blow which crushed my heart. In the same place where I had told you that you.. In the same place where I had told you that you didn't deserved to kiss me and in front of the same number of people or a little more you said " Khushi Gupta I hate you. You told me that I didn't deserve to kiss you but you know what?? It is not me who doesn't deserve to kiss you but it's you who doesn't deserve me.. Deserve my kisses and neither my love. I hate you Khushi, I hate you so much . Just get the hell out of my life and never show me your face again. " And that was the last day I had smiled and cried. Yeah I had cried the hell out of me that day and night but after that no tears escaped my eyes. I was hurt and I wanted to cry, I wanted to shout and also to confront him why he did that to me but I had no energy left inside me. And my heart was already so shattered that I wanted to add no more pains to it. That also was the last day I saw his face because after that day I never was there at the place where he was. His face disgusted me but no matter how much ever he disgusts me, I know deep inside my heart the love I had for him is still there all safe and I hate myself for not being able to take that thing out. Broken I was that day and broken I am still today but it doesn't bother you, does it?? You surely must be there faking you love to somebody else and here I am all alone bearing the consequences of my blinded trust.š
So this is it.
Hope you all like it.š
I know it's way too random but couldn't write any better than this for the moment.š¤
Do like and comment.
Love,
Rhea.
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