indu,
may i kiss you and hug you madly.
asr khushi lovemaking, while yes it will have all that is carnal in it and it must, but it will always have that spiritual content, that vishwaas, that unnameable thing that connects them... my way of seeing it.
you felt that... yes, there is perhaps the idiot writer's take on love and sex in that first time... i kept imagining him sitting before her looking at her body, for the very first time bare before his eyes. what would that do to him? he has seen enough women... but she is more than just a woman isn't she? and he more than just a man, a ritually accepted pati?
every time i saw him gather her close and lay his head on her lap.. i didn't write about the tears but you felt it... they are always there in him, especially when he comes close to deep emotion he feels them... maybe that's why he fights feeling things... khushi broke through that barricade and got him to touch his feelings again... in that dark room holding her, he felt a peace which he hadn't felt in years, not since that night. he spent time with it, paid homage perhaps to a primal feeling of love and those that bring us to it.. our mother, our partner...
a beauty percolates into some moments in our lives... if i am to believe in and love a fiction and its love and its man and woman, i need to feel them as real... otherwise everything disintegrates and i am just writing because i happen to know english and am killing time.
it never was that for me... without you came after a lot of resistance to writing anything fictional about these two people created by others.
and since i am here... also now in not cut out for love... a story as honestly and truly told as i am capable of. bas. two different flavours, but the essence the very same.
i have often wanted to write erotic things about asr khushi, but am scared that it will be pedestrian, not quite asr khushi. what is asr khushi? no idea... but i often felt while watching ipk, they were absolutely physical at one level, and never ever quite so at another. they were youthful and here and now and also timeless and in ever stage of time...
when i write intimacy, i would like to convey that somehow...
so glad you were comfortable reading it. if durga is too, well almost, i would leap with joy and gratitude.
i know some felt they could do with more "mature" stuff. that tag is misleading... i did not wish to put it but then thought, maybe it's only fair since this was far more adult in describing physical intimacy than what i had written earlier.
funny thing is, the moment you tag it mature, all those who you are supposed to warn, come rushing to read..
sorry for bakbak, but you so goy it... this is me leaping in happiness.
Shiv Shakti
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