Shivaay Drabble: Mantra - Page 2

Originally posted by: Innika

Hi Anisa,

I don't recall reading your writing before, but I read this and I practically stalked the forum to find your past works. Looks like I have a bit of catching up to do!

First off, thank you.

Good pieces of writing can make the world of a difference to someone's mood, you feel? I've had the most drab day, so reading this sweet drabble was literally the only good thing that happened today.

I'm really glad that you had a bit of PSO in this story; I've always wanted to delve further in the relationship that Shivaay shared with his grandfather, because he is the only one out of all the brothers that actually saw him. You've written his character so well, and I see a lot of the hallmarks of SSO in him, so kudos to you for being so subtle, yet getting so much across!

The mention of the heart problem was something else that I absolutely loved. I was really counting on Shivaay's heart problem making for an interesting track to watch. Even though I'm a hardcore ShivIka track, I was really hoping that it would be a really bitter OBro subplot. Alas, now that its been shown to be triggered from a dust(?!) allergy, I've pretty much given on that track existing, let alone being remotely legitimate. However, you wrote that inclination brilliantly. And the little hint about Om was so cute, you had me tear up a bit there!

As for the essence of this story, which is literally what got me so excited, is that you actually justified that cheesy as frick line that Shivaay keeps saying in the show. For me, it really retracts from the severity and the elegance behind his character. Even though its said as comfort, every time he says that stupid line, I find myself cringing, and the seriousness of the scene being lost. Saying that, the way that you made that whole sentiment come to line was so beautiful. I wish that we got something like this on the show, where we find out that Shivaay says this line with reason, rather than a shit load of tadi. Another example of a line I really want to know the details behind was AnHil's poem/lullaby that they sing when she gets her nightmares. I feel like the CVs start tracks and subplots with so much potential, and yet, they somehow manage to abandon/ruin half of them.

Sorry for the rant + loved it + please keep writing more!

With love,

Innika

Originally posted by: .Dalisay.

Loved it.. 👏

I think Herneet n Nakuul should read this! they ll love it too. :)

Originally posted by: preity_d

Lovely ! It was serene ! ❤️ The backdrop story connecting to his decease of childhood created a heavy impact on his chant "Shivay Singh Oberoi ki jaan itni asani se nahi jayegi"... Wish CV's use this to add more depth to the character, I am sure TRP people also will like this kind of things ! I so hope to see this onscreen !

Originally posted by: Nikita_Smith

Nice backdrop story!

Originally posted by: bworm

Awww. ..that was beautiful.

Originally posted by: _SilverLining_

I really liked the idea of his chant being connected to his childhood and his disease, whatever that is. Very beautifully written, Anisa👏

Originally posted by: chottekikhushi

Wow!! Beautiful drabble Ann!! Yes, his oft repaeated lines should have had something like this to back it up!!

Originally posted by: poemssyndrome

This makes his mantra so much more powerful & inspiring! I always thought it was his way to give it back to his disease & your story feels so perfect to it as a backdrop!
Loved it!

Originally posted by: YeHoKyaRahaHai

Loved it Anisa :)