Originally posted by: Fantasia.
Oh i should have posted my thoughts here and not made a seperaye topic .. anyways ..
I whole heartredly agree with abuse is abuse no matter what, but i just need to know your opinion abt zara's behaviour bcz somewhere even after blaming Kabeer i cant help but understand what he went thru .. i am not blinded by his rage bcz i can somewhere see what went wrong ..judt vcz zara is HELPING him doesnt give her the levrage of all of us? She is interfering when there is no need .. or one can do anything he/she wants unless he/she is not physically abusive? Mtlb waise kuch bhi kar lo?
Hey sorry for the extreme late reply. I have a lill baby so squeezing in time for myself is quite a challenge😆
Anyways, onto the bold part! Well my take is as follows:
- It depends!!
On the view at which I am looking at Zara. If I am looking at Zara from Kabir's POV, then YES, she is as you call it 'interfering'. Kabir as we know is rigid in his beliefs/asool and all that jazz. HE has been brought up in an environment where the husband takes the call and wives follows (although I don't see this in Kashaan and Zeenat's case so yet another loophole I suppose). But ya, coming back to Kabir, this is what forms his character - his beliefs, his asool, his way of thinking and looking at things. So this is his project and per his 'asool', taking help from wife is a complete NO as that hurts his so called 'male-ness', then her doing anything with regards to the project is 'interference' - TO HIM that is.
Now if I am looking at Zara from a third man's eye, then no, she is only doing what is in HER character - that is - going out of her way to do what she can for the people she loves and cares for the most - her parents and now her husband, Kabir! Remember, this is the same Zara who said yes for the marriage she was completely against, for who? For her parents, why? Coz they mattered to her. Similarly, Kabir matters to her. His dreams matters to her. So she will do anything and everything under the sun to ensure it gets done. And let's not forget, this is the first time Kabir has opened up to her in terms of his aspirations, dreams and future plans. Any newly wed wife will do what Zara is trying to do for her husband - to pitch in from her end whatever she can!
Now my issue is not really what Zara is trying to do or what Kabir's thots are. My issue is how he handled this entire ordeal. He opens up to Zara and tells her about the Meher chq and how he felt about it. He didn't let Zara speak coz OK, they are interrupted, but he did say the will finish talking later. So on what basis did he just declare to his dad right after that he will be returning the chq. Did he get approval of Zara? Its her gifted money afterall right? She is entitled to do whatsoever she wishes with it - so if she planned to gift it to Kabir as a 'surprise' (and we know from epi 1 how she loves giving surprises), I don't see her doing anything wrong. But no, Kabir puts her on the spot. What is she suppose to do now that she had deposited that chq? She did what even I would have done - written a chq back to the dad. Now how did Kabir react to this? He immediately blamed her and blasted her without hearing her out. Had he completed his talk with her regarding the chq? Had he voiced his opinion before this incident that he did not want her interference? NO. So what gave him the right to talk to his newly wed wife in such rude and harsh manner? Still Ok fine, he blew up, they argued and slept over it. Next morning he leaves without informing her about a potential investor who would be turning up as a guest and who 'expects' a certain behavior. She finds it out from her mother-in-law, who also is not quite clear as to what she meant when she said the guest will be very 'mazhabi'. No one specifically told her about hiding faces and all. She is new to the family still. Atleast Kabir being her husband should have informed Zara knowing very well how she is. What happens post in the living room was quite 'Zara-like'. We know she is outspoken when it comes to women and their rights and that guy basically tickled her itching nerve, outcome was an understandably raging Kabir. Still all this is fine till he manhandles her! And I am sorry, that is exactly where I will not tolerate no matter who is at fault.
You DO NOT get physical under any circumstances, no matter how right you are and wrong the other person is. PERIOD. There is no justification for physical violence at all and thats that!
So while the Kabir's anger is justified, his way to deal with it is not. I'd also like to add, any action done that causes harm can never be correct. What Zara was doing was not going to cause any harm other than Kabir's own personal ego but what Kabir did (manhandle) is causing harm.
Sorry for the long reply but I hope I was able to answer your question. Feel free to agree or disagree!😊
Edited by sajni786 - 7 years ago
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
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