Up in the air! DT Note Page 4 - Page 3

Originally posted by: Writer_Soul

I really want to know where we're these bold voices when Imlie was going through such a ordeal in initial episodes.

Poor Malini, she is being cheated on, where were this righteousness gone when Imlie was being treated unfairly for?

Honestly👏👏👏

Where were all these people screaming about bigamy and law back when Aditya was marrying Malini?

Forget treated unfairly, why weren't these same people standing against cheating/EMA back then?

I just find it funny that we have double standards for these two ladies, especially when one is an educated mature privileged 30-35 year old and one is a 18-19(?) year old poor kid.

Maid this, maid that...as if it's very insulting and a heinous crime to become a maid and therefore all maids are evil seductresses.

Originally posted by: Divi1301

Seriously such butchery of the law, Malini being an educated professor gets silenced on hearing Imlie is Adityas first wife ? Without even questioning why did he conceal the fact and still married her?? just a token confession and her fainting can’t be the excuse for Adi to go ahead with his second wedding .. baccho ka khel samajh rakha hai.. Section 494, 495, 406 all up in the air! Just to show Imlie Aditya as lovebirds .. such badly written dialogues today , no intensity in performance , not even an inch of repentance..for this they kept building the suspense? Oh wait, I think all intensity is reserved for SK Adi face-off and Adilie union only .. wah !! Anything for TRPs !! And where was the Aditya Malini hug shown in promo .. another gimmick?? me just waiting just for SK for the superb actor he is! Warna 🙏to the show ..And Aditya journalist hai ya Supreme Court ka judge ? Such confidence , suicide Karle , do shaadi karle phir bhi jail jaana hi nahi hai usne!! Malini is just not able to make him pay for his deeds .. instead she was muttering that she is the dusri aurat, what a joke!! Public has evolved a lot since saas bahu days, keep showing stuff like this in circa 2021 and there will be mass exodus to other shows..

Why did he conceal? You just answered that yourself, Malini's unrealistic fragility is the simple answer.

Why did he still marry her? Because he wanted to and thought he was in love with her.

Now was he right? Definitely not and he deserves all the insults for that and jail time. Why he even deserves a thappad or five.

At the end of the day, we're being shown a realistic and flawed character who errs. To err is human, atleast he hasn't led her on since he realised his feelings.

Situations and hard headedness plus a pre-existing relationship made everything hard. In those extreme times, it's rare that we make the right choices when it seems like we have no choices.

Malini has been written badly for a while now, why expect her to take him to court when she committed suicide for his attention. It doesn't fit with her character, it'll be very out of character but then again since she's inconsistent, I can't fault you for having that expectation.

This is the same educated professor who committed and glorified suicide (all that over a man) and hasn't been shown to have any remorse.

Originally posted by: Writer_Soul

I really want to know where we're these bold voices when Imlie was going through such a ordeal in initial episodes.

Poor Malini, she is being cheated on, where were this righteousness gone when Imlie was being treated unfairly for?

May be they were not watching the initial episodes but I would really like to know where are these bold voices when Imlie is getting abused now?

I guess, a high class society person doing a suicide in a weak movement is a big deal but a high class society person abusing a poor girl, breaking her head is the norm and accepted... .🤢

Originally posted by: Writer_Soul

I really want to know where we're these bold voices when Imlie was going through such a ordeal in initial episodes.

Poor Malini, she is being cheated on, where were this righteousness gone when Imlie was being treated unfairly for?

If Suicide was a moment of weakness, then why Imlie staying as a maid or accepting her marriage is weak or immoral.

A so called well educated mature professor has crossed all boundaries of stupidity and a 18 year old is held responsible for her thought process she grew up with.

Why?

She shouldn't think about her financial and physical security but chase a so called self respect that would either land her up on roads or back in her regressive village. Even if she choose to believe in marriage, who is any one to tell her not to follow her belief system. She never forced her self on anyone.

While suicide has been seen upon from just precious Malini's point of view. Well this moment of weakness could have ended entire life of not just her ,but her parents, Aditya and Imlie, inflicting life long psychological trauma on them.

That beautiful Suicide note she wrote was enough to finish everything for Aditya, even his family considering he did no crime. He has wronged malini, but never once disrespected or abused her. Why he should be punished for offense like harassment, when he never did any of that.

What Malini did was a terrible deed, keeping aside her post Suicide actions which hardly make any sense.

Imlie will any day be superior for me, then Malini. Today also instead of asking right questions and bashing Aditya, all Malini madam did was trashing Imlie using cheapest words most of the time.

Typical mentality of blaming the girl instead of grilling your own husband, that is a big sign of a weak mind and shallow character.

I will speak for myself here .....not everyone else. First things first...mmmmi haven't been frequently visiting forums for a long time. So I hvnt posted anything abt the atrocities Imlie faced initially. But I hv neither supported it nor made fun of it. But no Imlie and Malini's situations are not the same. Imlie chose to be in that situation whereas Malini did not. Imlie knew the entire truth from the moment the moment she entered the city whereas Malini was kept in the dark the entire time. Most importantly Adi was forced to marry Imlie but he happily married Malini of his own accord.

Having said that no I don't support and I do condemn the shitty treatment Imlie received from Adi den and Anu always. Nowhere justified.

I do not at all agree that Imlie chose financial stability , dts why she stayed as a maid at Tripathi's. Nope not at all. Adi had offered her money for her security. He had even encouraged her to pursue her dreams and told her he would support her in dt and even help her in moving forward. But the instant Imlie heard Adi wants to detach himself from her........she chose to ran back to that " regressive " village . How come then the regressive village and financial instability didn't deter her.

And it's funny how you refer to her village as regressive but uphold it's beliefs and traditions as strong.

As for Adi..... I don't any shred of sympathy left for the guy. If he would hv been in legal hell.....well he very much so deserves it.

As for blaming the girl goes. Yes it's wrong to only blame the girl. I am wid you on that . Both should be blamed. Both of them are to be held responsible for this. But I don't get why the girl should be spared ??!!! On what basis ? Let me remind you Malini was the one who always supported and stood by Imlie when Adi treated her like shit. She loved her and cared for her when she didn't even know her. When such a person betrays you.....the betrayal feels worse. Anyone would lash out . Yes she should hv blamed both people who deceived her....not just Imlie.

And I will always find Malini a better person and stronger character than Imlie or Aditya. To each his own. You might value certain traits , I value others. You may find certains things in Malini shallow , I find certain things in Imlie hypocritical and weak. Perspectives.

Originally posted by: DaffodilsNew

I will speak for myself here .....not everyone else. First things first...mmmmi haven't been frequently visiting forums for a long time. So I hvnt posted anything abt the atrocities Imlie faced initially. But I hv neither supported it nor made fun of it. But no Imlie and Malini's situations are not the same. Imlie chose to be in that situation whereas Malini did not. Imlie knew the entire truth from the moment the moment she entered the city whereas Malini was kept in the dark the entire time. Most importantly Adi was forced to marry Imlie but he happily married Malini of his own accord.

Having said that no I don't support and I do condemn the shitty treatment Imlie received from Adi den and Anu always. Nowhere justified.

I do not at all agree that Imlie chose financial stability , dts why she stayed as a maid at Tripathi's. Nope not at all. Adi had offered her money for her security. He had even encouraged her to pursue her dreams and told her he would support her in dt and even help her in moving forward. But the instant Imlie heard Adi wants to detach himself from her........she chose to ran back to that " regressive " village . How come then the regressive village and financial instability didn't deter her.

And it's funny how you refer to her village as regressive but uphold it's beliefs and traditions as strong.

As for Adi..... I don't any shred of sympathy left for the guy. If he would hv been in legal hell.....well he very much so deserves it.

As for blaming the girl goes. Yes it's wrong to only blame the girl. I am wid you on that . Both should be blamed. Both of them are to be held responsible for this. But I don't get why the girl should be spared ??!!! On what basis ? Let me remind you Malini was the one who always supported and stood by Imlie when Adi treated her like shit. She loved her and cared for her when she didn't even know her. When such a person betrays you.....the betrayal feels worse. Anyone would lash out . Yes she should hv blamed both people who deceived her....not just Imlie.

And I will always find Malini a better person and stronger character than Imlie or Aditya. To each his own. You might value certain traits , I value others. You may find certains things in Malini shallow , I find certain things in Imlie hypocritical and weak. Perspectives.

On point. They have made malini a weak villian and glorified cheap ema , ragging ,bullshit sindoor beliefs,making fun of marriage, legal issues have been made to feel like a joke, women getting treated like dirt, graphic violence. Just in the name of trp and getting the lead couple together by hook or crook. Seriously after this cheap drama how can they again show romance after destroying one women's life. Such regressive stories deserve be just stopped. Male lead is the most coward and spineless in history of itv.

DT Note

I don't think we can have any discussion in the forum without moral policing and bashing each others opinions. Such comments have been removed for now and the offenders will be accordingly dealt.

The topic is being left open for discussion if at all a healthy discussion is possible.

Imlie DT

Originally posted by: abha981

On point. They have made malini a weak villian and glorified cheap ema , ragging ,bullshit sindoor beliefs,making fun of marriage, legal issues have been made to feel like a joke, women getting treated like dirt, graphic violence. Just in the name of trp and getting the lead couple together by hook or crook. Seriously after this cheap drama how can they again show romance after destroying one women's life. Such regressive stories deserve be just stopped. Male lead is the most coward and spineless in history of itv.

In the end- it’s a story. It’s a bold story where characters are more real than any of the candy flossed sugar- coated stories where heroes are whiter than white and can do no wrong. Again this is a story where no one is perfect - least of all the hero.

Yes - forced weddings are illegal- both Adi, Imlie and other characters in the show say it. Forced weddings at gun point happen in some villages even today- I am yet to see another show that so boldly brought it out into the faces of the public for discussion. The devastating consequences for all characters involved cannot be denied. Because there is such a huge discussion on the topic- people are actually talking about it. I’d rather society talks about it than it be allowed to continue in the darkness or buried in the pages of news papers where people read it like something happening in another world. In an interview the writer of the original story Leena Gangopadhyay says that this is based on real life of a woman who actually went through this. No newspaper article, documentary or even the movies made on the topic have brought it into our homes for discussion as vividly as this serial did.

Just because Adi falls for Imlie - it doesnot glorify their wedding. Their romance is separate from this and beautiful - because they are so different and kind of ‘obviously’ mismatched and in its own way it breaks certain barriers in this genre of romance serials. Usually the ML falls for the female lead just by looking at her - usually in a breath- taking moment and for her ‘beauty’- ( at least the few I have seen) or external appearance. I put ‘beauty’ in commas because it’s beauty according to ITV- a fair, slim heroine. Also In other serials -there is a triangle - but always subtly they show the woman the hero doesnot love as being ‘negative’ in some way- wearing skimpy clothes or not being traditional enough or not knowing how to cook - so then it’s made palatable to the viewers that it’s ‘okay’ the hero doesnot love her. She didn’t ‘deserve’ his love - as if it were a prize to be won.

In this show this is the first time I have seen that not to be true- Malini is rich and beautiful and educated - the family love her but more importantly so do So many of the viewers- yet Adi falls for the one that so many people within and outside the show call ‘naukrani’( as if that were something despicable). In a society where Fair and Lovely is promoted, where speaking English without an accent is prized, to have a heroine who is so different from the norm but be SO confident in herself. That is a huge thing in my opinion - a huge glass wall that is broken. And This is a more real characterization of love than I have seen- because it’s true - there is no formula or logic for how love happens and with whom. In real life also, this is true of love . And he doesnot love her initially- he falls for her boldness and optimism just like we did. It also prompts a discussion on what love is - that so often May be we do confuse friendship and ‘a similarity’ of views to be love.

It also shows that despite having all these qualities so valued by society in a woman- that you be fair and rich and educated -Malini is also flawed and insecure. That just ‘owning’ or ‘having’ these qualities is no guarantee for happiness. And more importantly that eventually you have to be the owner of your happiness - that you cannot base all your happiness on another’s affections.

And Imlie has her own set of flaws - her biggest flaw is also one that is worthy of discussion- that sacrificing your happiness for that of others doesnot always land you in a good place. And that in the end only you are there to fight for your own happiness and denying yourself your happiness doesn’t leave you with a good taste - it can leave you bitter.

There is so much in this serial to see and appreciate but again it depends on your point of view. But I do hope that bolder stories like this are told so that we can discuss things that we prefer to keep buried.

No story is ever perfect - but the good ones have characters who capture our attention and really good ones have flawed characters which is why so many can relate to them. Even in so many of our epics we have heroes and even Gods who fall, fail and do wrong - Adi is but a mere mortal.

Originally posted by: DaffodilsNew

I am tired of explaining to every person. Suicide isn't something which weak people do. Tagging a person who commited or attempted suicide is just equal to making fun of the whole thing. People don't do it bcz they are weak. It's a moment of depression or a sequence of events leading up to it. It's when a person feels helplessness that they think they ought to do it bcz the pain feels overwhelming. It's very easy to say be strong as long as you havent been in their position or felt what mental pressure they have felt. Depression is real issue and so is suicide . It's not something weak people made up.

It's so unfair to call every person who has ever been on that position weak. I wish people would be more sensitive and understanding of mental health .....world would definitely be a better place.

Imlie is not a role model for me and I won't suggest any woman I know to be like Imlie . Instead of trying to do something for your family and focussing on making a future , just go and pursue a forced marriage and stay as a maid of the sake of your husband. Say you want someone's happiness when in reality you want that happiness for yourself. Well she isn't a role model for me.

As for your question.....yes I hv watched the show and I find Imlie and Aditya's actions far too questionable than anyone else's. Well to rethink Anu and Dev would top the list, followed by Aditya and Imlie. Love isnt the only value in life.....not for me. There are things I value over love.....for example loyalty, honesty , friendship , family and respect.

There's no such thing as a moment of depression, that's an oxymoron.

A brief moment of sadness is just that, sadness. But depression is when:

Most people go through periods of feeling down, but when you're depressed you feel persistently sad for weeks or months, rather than just a few days.

Suicide in it's most base form is a cry for attention and help.

Treatment for depression can involve a combination of lifestyle changes, talking therapies and medicine.

And this is where the show went wrong and the character lost any and all sympathy because rather than coming across as a depressed person who saw no reason in living, she came across as manipulative, calculative and most importantly emotionally abusive. (I come to this conclusion taking into account her previously established emotionally abusive behaviour, choosing to starve herself until Adi comes for her, leaving her in-laws house because Adi isn't there and will only come back if Adi collects her etc)

She came back with and to the man that is a trigger for her suicide. The relationship that triggered her to take that extreme step.

Here's what I heard very loudly and clearly when she stepped back into that house with that man:

'I'll kill myself if you leave me.'

Instead of seeing her as a sympathetic person who's feeling of helplessness and hopelessness pushed her to that step, I saw a lady use it as the ultimate level of emotional abuse.

What really cemented my view of her as abusive is her own words.

'You always make me wait Adi, So I'd thought I'd make you wait'

She herself admitted she attempted suicide for insidious reasons such as revenge and not because she saw it as the only viable option in her life at this point.

Depression and suicide are very real and a lot of people live with it and it can be triggered by the smallest of things (to outsiders small but not to the person) but depressed people can be manipulative (not on purpose most of the time but depression itself is very personality warping and insidious), they need professional help and sometimes medicine and a combination of things.

Most depressed people live a hard life of always having to question whether their action/reaction is from a place of manipulation or not and it's always their actions after extreme steps that truly show their character.

Most people (especially educated) after suicide attempt would get professional help and try to get better, feel remorse and not glorify suicide because it gave them what they wanted to some level.

As you said there's more to value in life than love...family, friendship, career, honesty, respect etc so why kill yourself for revenge on a man.

Malini is not weak because she has depression or attempted suicide, she is weak (to me) because she did it out of revenge when she had more in her life than this one man and therefore has glorified suicide to all viewers.

You said you value honesty and was Adi not honest to Malini about his forced marriage in PD and yet Malini refused to accept it. He was forced to lie because of her reaction, she wants to hear the trurh but if it's one that doesn't suit her needs, she doesn't want to hear it and ends up straight in hospital.

It's very draining and emotionally abusive to live with a person like that and they need professional help.

Ofcourse he should have never married her but that is a different topic.

Originally posted by: Sunnygrin1

In the end- it’s a story. It’s a bold story where characters are more real than any of the candy flossed sugar- coated stories where heroes are whiter than white and can do no wrong. Again this is a story where no one is perfect - least of all the hero.

Yes - forced weddings are illegal- both Adi, Imlie and other characters in the show say it. Forced weddings at gun point happen in some villages even today- I am yet to see another show that so boldly brought it out into the faces of the public for discussion. The devastating consequences for all characters involved cannot be denied. Because there is such a huge discussion on the topic- people are actually talking about it. I rather society talks about it rather than it be allowed to continue in the darkness or buried in the pages of news papers where people read it like something happening in another world. In an interview the writer of the original story Leena Gangopadhyay says that this is based on real life of a woman who actually went through this. No newspaper article, documentary or even the movies made on the topic have brought it into our homes for discussion as vividly as this serial did.

There is so much in this serial to see and appreciate but again it depends on your point of view. But I do hope that bolder stories like this are told so that we can discuss things that we prefer to keep buried.

No story is ever perfect - but the good ones have characters who capture our attention and really good ones have flawed characters which is why so many can relate to them. Even in so many of our epics we have heroes and even Gods who fall, fail and do wrong - Adi is but a mere mortal.

As you put it aptly 'the devastating consequences'.

The Adilie forced marriage has an equally devastating effect on all 3 leads and this effect is even felt by all the families involved.

Maybe given their own time and space, Adilie would have fallen for each other and Adi would never get married to Malini.

If they're meant to be, they would have always found their path leading to each other sooner or later.

But because of the forced marriage, Adi's rightful anger (on the situation and not Imlie) caused him to make considerable errs and sent him to a dark and flawed path.

Wherein, he unfortunately ruined two woman's life to some extent (I personally find it misogynistic to say that but also I'm aware of the world we live in and it's views, norms and rules) and his own.

The respectable thing about his character has always been that when he felt himself to be in love with Malini, he never betrayed that relationship and when he fell for Imlie, he distanced himself from Malini as much as he could given the circumstances (her mental and physical health).

Originally posted by: DaffodilsNew

As for your question.....yes I hv watched the show and I find Imlie and Aditya's actions far too questionable than anyone else's. Well to rethink Anu and Dev would top the list, followed by Aditya and Imlie. Love isnt the only value in life.....not for me. There are things I value over love.....for example loyalty, honesty , friendship , family and respect.

@bold : +1 , completely agree on how incredible traits like this are often looked down and the ‘love’ in traditional itv sense is seen as some thing as a ultimate or incomparable (add fate thrown into this and you can’t even touch that relationship😆)