Sahir could sense the bad mood...Not that she was doing anything to cover it up! She was so lost in her world, she was probably not even aware he was still there.
"Main...Allah Knows...What is wrong with Ammi...And worst is my own reaction. Can't even control myself..", she muttered on as she tore up the design in frustration.
It was a week since they had stumbled across Abbu and his son on the way to the hospital. She thanked Allah her sisters were not there to see the love their ammi poured out for the boy' who stole their father from them. She had wanted to walk away without a second glance...Ammi had to stop and chat up and admire' the naalayak baap ka naalayak aulad'. She could still not stop fuming when she remembered how natural it had all been for her ammi. Had Zaki not been there, she would have dragged her mother away without a thought. She had been trying to ignore her feelings; but they were building up- Suffocation...Anger...Frustration...Helplessness...
Sahir raised his eyebrows.They rarely communicated on anything beyond business. They had both had an understanding prior to their marriage and strictly stuck to the rules. Zaki had briefed him about Arzoo's reactions that day- everyone assumed they were a regular couple- but he had refrained from entering her personal space.Theirs was an impersonal relationship- nothing beyond offering a mug of coffee or approving or criticising each other's ideas. Naturally, this office space' in their room was where they conversed the most. And she was usually the talker.His responses were mostly in monosyllables...Where required, he would elaborate with a comment or two...
Her restlessness for the past week had not escaped him. But he had adhered to his end of the baragin- her personal life was none of his business.
But she had not settled over the week. She managed to maintain her calm at work...he supposed only he could see that trace of a frown beneath the facade of cheerfulness. He could see through the mask...he supposed that could even make them a couple'...
But now..He ought to speak, perhaps?
He cleared his throat.
Arzoo looked towards him. She had forgotten he was still there. But she was ready to flare up. She wished he would leave for that meeting before she blew up soon. Afterall, he didn't need to get involved in all this!
She sighed. The man was waiting in anticipation...patiently.
He was a good listener...Even if he was a Black and White photograph! And she needed to talk.
"Woh...I don't know...I am just not myself. Why is it that the unpleasant stuff we want to leave behind come chasing us every now and then?"
Yeah. He could relate to that. What she spoke of as unpleasant stuff'- putting it together with Zaki's news...when it refused to go away, he knew the unpleasant stuff was one's conscience. He ought to have a Ph.D, going by his vast experience there!
A trace of smile flickered on. It meant go on'. That was her cue.
"Pata nahi. I know I am not wrong. But this is chewing on my brain...As if it is not going to let me ignore it...As if I would be judged on this..." (Phew...That felt better. It felt like she already knew what the problem was!)
He smiled a bit more. He was about to leave. The way she looked away, he knew she was not expecting an answer from him. But if it helped her...
"Kyun? Why do you look for approval elsewhere? Be comfortable with who you are...Just as you are..." Their eyes met as he turned and left.
It was her turn to smile now. That was the answer she had wanted- that reassurance... But she was not sure if that was The Answer'.
They had the same question- their compatibility there amused her. She wondered which one of them would find the answer first.
...Or...Had he even stopped asking that question?
Happiness filled a corner of her heart..a thought slipped between the pages of her mind...He would never judge her on the decisions she made in her personal life.
Instead, she noted in amusement how a well practised farce had started convincing even them...Did they just talk like a couple?!!!
PS: This is a little crazy, perhaps...😆 Background for the thought:
On the surface, Arzoo and Sahir may seem very different- as he constantly reminds her and probably would continue to. Deep down we all know how they both are stubborn when it comes to their past. There could come a time when they start looking for support from each other, unaware of the bonding that has happened...if that were to happen...this is what I imagined.
Probably the two thoughts I wanted to convey were:
1. Sahir would unconditionally accept Arzoo.
2. He would do it so silently, Arzoo wouldn't know he has upgraded the staus of their relationship.
...And ...in case anyone is wondering- since Arzoo did not elaborate on the reason for her bad mood, she supposes Sahir gave her a generalised answer. Ofc, by now Sahir knows about the existence of the second family.😆
Hindi TV Shows
Cricket
