Is possessiveness a sign of love? - Page 3

Originally posted by: nethraa_99

In the last episode of Ghum, Sunny advises Virat to tell Sai that he loves her so much that he cannot see her with someone else. It was a weird dialogue for me. It got me thinking about what everyone else felt about possessiveness.

To me possessiveness is suffocating, limiting. It feels like a loss of personal space and autonomy. Is it also controlling? Possessiveness can have degrees ofcourse - it can be extreme like in Virat or quite mild or something in between. It is not gender specific since both men and women can be possessive.

Where does possessiveness come from - a sense of insecurity? Or is it the result of conservative thinking? Or is it a phase in certain relationships?

All types of views are appreciated. Let us keep the discussion healthy.

There are different shades of love .. each to his own .. jodiya upar se ban ke aati hai ..

some people enjoy if their partners are possessive.. I have seen it with many .. and if they are not .. they crib they are indifferent to them .. so long couples maintain a healthy balance a little bit if possessiveness is good in a relationship.. it keeps them tied to each other .. and also makes the other happy

but when it gets stifling or overbearing .. it can wreck a relationship .. so how much is allowed and healthy has to be decided mutually by the partners .. Sai has let virat known that this amount of possessiveness is intolerable to her as what happened in ajinkye episode .. even the aniket one she was not amused.. and started calling virat KJ

but changing names of her male friends she was getting it .. and can enjoy the jealousy .. the parameter has to be decided by each couple .. because all of us are different

Possessiveness , jealousy, anger and a lot of others are negative emotions and no, unlike common belief , they are not natural...its a sign that there is something wrong with one's mental health ..some issue which needs to be addressed. They stem from Insecurity , low self esteem, sense of ownership and fear...

Yes ,possessiveness can be in any relation..parent child , siblings , or husband wife , lovers..but in any relation its not normal. If a husband feels possessive for his wife, there is something wrong with him, not her. If her heart is somewhere else , he anyways can't do anything about it by tying her to him. Possessiveness between siblings and parent child is very unhealthy . N between lovers its always toxic. Phir toh itna haq hi nai hota

Haan what happens naturally is , while in love , a person hardly pays attention to anyone else , nothing and nobody is important anymore and the other person feels it. They enjoy the undivided attention . They automatically feel secure . Jitna pyar utna possessivess , NO. It's the opposite..jitna pyar possessiveness utna kam hona chahiye.

Originally posted by: nethraa_99

In the last episode of Ghum, Sunny advises Virat to tell Sai that he loves her so much that he cannot see her with someone else. It was a weird dialogue for me. It got me thinking about what everyone else felt about possessiveness.

To me possessiveness is suffocating, limiting. It feels like a loss of personal space and autonomy. Is it also controlling? Possessiveness can have degrees ofcourse - it can be extreme like in Virat or quite mild or something in between. It is not gender specific since both men and women can be possessive.

Where does possessiveness come from - a sense of insecurity? Or is it the result of conservative thinking? Or is it a phase in certain relationships?

All types of views are appreciated. Let us keep the discussion healthy.

Personally I find it suffocating 🧐😬

It takes a lot for me to trust people ..i expect honesty respect and clear communication. I can't read minds

I am very non judgemental and open to talk ..u have a issue open the mouth and talk.

I may understand Jealousy to a certain extent..but if the other person restricts u and all that for me it's a red flag

Even in friendship I don't appreciate it since I have an experience of ignoring it and then it becoming toxic.

I may have indulged my older bro on and of when we were younger since he has been my anchor. Plus both of us have a limited circle of friends

Originally posted by: AnjuRish

Personally I find it suffocating 🧐😬

It takes a lot for me to trust people ..i expect honesty respect and clear communication. I can't read minds

I am very non judgemental and open to talk ..u have a issue open the mouth and talk.

I may understand Jealousy to a certain extent..but if the other person restricts u and all that for me it's a red flag

Even in friendship I don't appreciate it since I have an experience of ignoring it and then it becoming toxic.

I may have indulged my older bro on and of when we were younger since he has been my anchor. Plus both of us have a limited circle of friends

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Where there is clear communication, honesty and respect, love and trust develops naturally. Then there is no place for mistrust and insecurity . Ur so right. Nobody can read minds.

possessiveness, according to me it will be good if it has a limit it should show your love to the person whom you love.Your over possessiveness should not restrict the person's happiness.Sometimes our loved ones possessiveness gives happiness to us a kind of excitement but in Virat's case it was toxic manhandling saying you should not speak to the person with whom you're more friendly this are nonsense.when you truly love someone you should let them breath,let them explore you will trust them that they're only yours

ITV likes to romanticize possessiveness and jealousy in relationships. But in reality, no one can put up with such extreme emotions. Everybody needs their freedom and autonomy. You cannot live a life of restrictions to please your partner. After a point, it will becomes extremely suffocating and detrimental to your mental health. We have so many cases of possessive people even harming their partners physically when they tries to get out of that relationship. Malayalam movie "Uyare" throws light on the negative aspects of such relationships and how they usually ends. I wish our movies and TV shows stop romanticizing such things that can mislead young minds. I have come across many teenagers who think it is romantic to be possessive. Trust me, once you enter into a relationship like that, you will only feel suffocated and nothing else. It is not all rose tinted like ITV and movies make it look like.

Possessiveness is a part of all relationships! But there is a thin line between what’s acceptable and whats not! The extent and the response to it define the right or wrong. It can arise from various reasons. Here it was insecurity, breeding from the fear of losing the one he loves.

Just to make my point more clearer, we enjoyed their cute banters over Aniket or Ajinkya. And once these two confess their love these may end up being Sai’s weapons to pull his leg, that he is jealous. But that’s normal. Only when he became serious and levelled serious allegations (including the one where he asked her if she likes Ajinkya on her Birthday night convo) was were he was crossing the line in his possessiveness.

Sometimes the harmless jealousy and possessiveness adds to security and emphasises love in a relationship. But then its about the complexity of human emotions. The right mix and right proportions is what is missed. There is web they get entangled in, and lose the sanity! And forget to differentiate between right and wrong and while one is high with possessiveness the other loses to suffocation and bondage.

Speaking of Virat's jealousy for Aniket, even that went above limit. He went to Sai's college to check out Aniket and wanted her to drop out of the freshers program. Sai didn't appreciate both these things. When Sai refused to give in to his wish, he behaved obnoxiously during the alta incident.

Originally posted by: janecastle

ITV likes to romanticize possessiveness and jealousy in relationships. But in reality, no one can put up with such extreme emotions. Everybody needs their freedom and autonomy. You cannot live a life of restrictions to please your partner. After a point, it will becomes extremely suffocating and detrimental to your mental health. We have so many cases of possessive people even harming their partners physically when they tries to get out of that relationship. Malayalam movie "Uyare" throws light on the negative aspects of such relationships and how they usually ends. I wish our movies and TV shows stop romanticizing such things that can mislead young minds. I have come across many teenagers who think it is romantic to be possessive. Trust me, once you enter into a relationship like that, you will only feel suffocated and nothing else. It is not all rose tinted like ITV and movies make it look like.

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I have seen negative side in friendship. I have a female friend who I consider only a casual friends but known for a decade now. She started dictating that I must tell her stuff first and that I should not hide stuff from her. She started interfering in my relationship with my bff and bro which pushed me to cut ties. No one messes with bro 🙈. I was undergoing a difficult pregnancy and already had mild depression. She just made it worse with nitpicking and trying to boss my life. So much so I moved to bro place to get away from negativity

Originally posted by: AnjuRish

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I have seen negative side in friendship. I have a female friend who I consider only a casual friends but known for a decade now. She started dictating that I must tell her stuff first and that I should not hide stuff from her. She started interfering in my relationship with my bff and bro which pushed me to cut ties. No one messes with bro 🙈. I was undergoing a difficult pregnancy and already had mild depression. She just made it worse with nitpicking and trying to boss my life. So much so I moved to bro place to get away from negativity

Sorry to hear of your experience. That was clearly toxic friendship.