Virats "adjustment comment"

I watched Ghum after a considerable period of time. I was furious and enraged by the way Virat said every bahu should adjust to their in-law's house. How insensitive. tone-deaf and disgusting was that comment. Such words from an ACP who is in charge of women's safety are pathetic. I was upset with Virat's character for a long time but this is such a low. Sai is a victim of domestic violence and abuse by both her husband and in-laws. She was rendered homeless by him. The Chavans have mentally tortured her to a point that she nearly had a breakdown in the hall. The breakdown during the Saree drama was so heartwrenching. That was abuse. There's no justification for any of this behavior.

Virat after 200+ episodes is aware of his family's crimes and how they treat her. In the initial episode, Virat who said his family is orthodox is someone whom I can understand. But if after witnessing all of this he still thinks Sai needs to adjust he is acting consciously blind and ignorant. That's so dangerous. His sweet talks and cutesy gifts arent enough for a relationship to work out. If he can't make a safe environment for his wife he shouldn't use the pati card on her either.

Virat's care and support are all conditional. As long as he is happy and his ego is satisfied he will offer support and love. But in the face of adversities either he stands mute or resorts to abusive actions.

I am not sure if there was a particular topic created for this dialogue. Please share your views.

This pair is incompatible. They are better off without each other at this point

Blood boiling comment. He has this habit of brushing aside the trauma Sai is going through in that house. He thinks that Sai is giving back as good as she gets - therefore all the drama doesn't affect her. 🙄 Seriously, guy needs to be put in a concentration camp for 6 months.

I believe in Bengali version FL retorts that what about adjustment from his family's side? ...and other things along those lines. But Ghum's dumbf*ck makers don't even want to address the issue, let alone show justice being done. They didn't make Sai utter a single sentence in protest.

He called Sai insensitive in that very episode...however I found his adjust karna padta hai to be extremely insensitive other than it being obvious regressive.

Originally posted by: asmi_joya

He called Sai insensitive in that very episode...however I found his adjust karna padta hai to be extremely insensitive other than its being obvious regressive.

He has made regressive statements before like "a girl's true home is her sasural". But this was so insensitive considering the torture Sai is going through. Even the previous night, he brushed off Sai's pain at being made to feel like living under charity as a taunt. He wants Sai to fight the daily battles, take his help if she needs, but not complain. Its not pleasant to watch an ML behave this way. I think people have got so used to Virat saying such crap that they have stopped reacting.

Now writers are on their way to normalise this abuse by projecting the Chavans as 'not bad' and making it Sai's responsibility to win their love.

Originally posted by: nethraa_99

Blood boiling comment. He has this habit of brushing aside the trauma Sai is going through in that house. He thinks that Sai is giving back as good as she gets - therefore all the drama doesn't affect her. 🙄 Seriously, guy needs to be put in a concentration camp for 6 months.

I believe in Bengali version FL retorts that what about adjustment from his family's side? ...and other things along those lines. But Ghum's dumbf*ck makers don't even want to address the issue, let alone show justice being done. They didn't make Sai utter a single sentence in protest.

Yes Nethra

He simply brushed aside her trauma as an adjustment issue. Even when she talked about the family harassing her his reply of not to speak uncomfortable truths made my blood boil. He cant act so blind after all these. He has witnessed how his family and Pakhi behave with Sai. Makes me wonder when will we see a character progression in him. His failure to grasp the abuse she's facing on a daily basis by his own family isn't going down well with me. He sounded so selfish and insensitive. He wants to love and attention from Sai and gets annoyed when it's not reciprocated. If he wants to exert the rights of a husband he should also be willing to take the responsibility of a husband- to make a safe environment for his wife. Him considering this to be normal is making me enraged.

Bengali version- Accha, the writers are just horrible then. Virat's characterization anyway was at rock bottom because of past actions. He didn't even get a proper redemption. Makers are horrible then. I was annoyed at Sai too for silently listening to that dialogue. I was not expecting her to silently listen to that crap.

Originally posted by: asmi_joya

He called Sai insensitive in that very episode...however I found his adjust karna padta hai to be extremely insensitive other than it being obvious regressive.

Exactly Asmi. He has made the patriarchy and regressiveness evident many times. But such a statement after witnessing the true colours of the family is disguting. He wants Sai to adjust and make peace with his family so that he can have a peaceful life it seemed. The whole scene made him look so selfish. Why is he not able to understand the abuse the girl whom he claims to love goes through? Sai was almost hallucinating the other day in her room. Shows how much mental stress she is going through. If the makers are showing this level of abuse its only fair audience expect it to be addressed

Originally posted by: nethraa_99

He has made regressive statements before like "a girl's true home is her sasural". But this was so insensitive considering the torture Sai is going through. Even the previous night, he brushed off Sai's pain at being made to feel like living under charity as a taunt. He wants Sai to fight the daily battles, take his help if she needs, but not complain. Its not pleasant to watch an ML behave this way. I think people have got so used to Virat saying such crap that they have stopped reacting.

Now writers are on their way to normalise this abuse by projecting the Chavans as 'not bad' and making it Sai's responsibility to win their love.

Bold - yes yes. I have often given justifications to many statements of Virat considering how orthodox and patriarchial his upbringing is. But he cant forever hide behind the conditioing.

Oh yes in fact he looked annoyed by Sai's taunts. He cant listen to one but Sai should listen and patiently adjust with everyone, waah. Virat is such a disappointment. But you are right people are used to hearing this from Virat. I am someone who looks for character progression. But Virat is going down the graph every day.

Exactly. Chavan's are criminals. I hate how they are whitewashing them. Sai shouldn't be trying to get their acceptance. I understand her wanting to have a family. Unfortunately Chavan's arent worth it.

Originally posted by: Anamika32

Exactly Asmi. He has made the patriarchy and regressiveness evident many times. But such a statement after witnessing the true colours of the family is disguting. He wants Sai to adjust and make peace with his family so that he can have a peaceful life it seemed. The whole scene made him look so selfish. Why is he not able to understand the abuse the girl whom he claims to love goes through? Sai was almost hallucinating the other day in her room. Shows how much mental stress she is going through. If the makers are showing this level of abuse its only fair audience expect it to be addressed

My issue certainly was how he made a statement that Sai is insensitive being insensitive to her sentiments beyond measures, knowing about his family even more.. He does come across selfish when he conveniently wants to stay away from the abuse his wife his facing at the hands of his ex and his family, in the name of "you can handle it all Sai' and lets me happy in our room while you should try to adjust with my criminal family..

Virat can romance in room but muh nahi kholenge when his wife is abused. Kaise pati hai yeh? Aur bol rahi hai criminals ke saath adjust karo.

I think hindi tv shows should be banned.

Be it here where the husband stands like a statue or gets violent & throws the wife out.

Be it Anupama where the Fl is the one slaving up for the family

Shaurya aur Anokhi where the ML just manhandles FL.

These writers make the Fl suffer in order to gain sympathy and trp but are downgrading the society.

The cases of domestic violence has increased so much due to pandemic.

Irresponsible writers