Disclaimer :
The following is fiction. Just a fiction.
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Hello Peeps.
The following one-shot is on the basis of contract marriage. I've always felt that, Khushi just went on crying or irritate Arnav almost four months, rather than acting with maturity. Accepted, she was just eighteen, but she had it in her, in her character. So, just did out of wish.
Important is that, no sad ending, in fact no ending!
Important is that, I forgot some details during the first days of marriage, so I have written which is in sync with the OS. If you find out, please don't question me, I don't know what to answer. If you didn't, I love you *muah*!!
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OS | First Step
"Di, what does he like to eat?" Khushi asked tentatively to Anjali, who was sitting high on the kitchen counter, eating a piece of pickle for her craving, as she cleaned the kitchen.
"He? Oh, Chotey?" Anjali asked.
"Yes." Khushi answered, flushing a little.
"Well ... Chotey doesn't like anything peculiar in anything! And most important is food! He eats what he's served without any fuss and will never asks something special for him, not ever in the before decade. Anyhow, he practiced himself to toast and orange juice as a routine!" Anjali said. Her face and eyes gave away the worry she felt for her brother, her Chotey.
"Par, aise kaise Di? How can a person be without any favourite food?" Khushi asked confused and mentally shuddered imagining herself to be in ArnavJi's situation. Jalebion ko bina zindigi? Hell!
"Waise hi Chotey! He made himself like that.. Nothing for him... Anjali's eyes moistened.
"Di... Khushi pressed her hands on hers, assuring her.
"Un sab chhodo! What made you to ask this?"
"Woh.. Kal unka janamdin hai na.." Khushi trailed off.
Anjali suddenly became serious, "He won't appreciate anything special done for him on his birthday, KhushiJi!"
"And this is why so?" Khushi asked, scratching her head.
"He never told me nor did I ask. But I know that, on his birthday he remembers and misses Maa a lot, especially her kheer." Anjali said as a small fond smile adorned her face.
Khushi swallowed hard.
"He never celebrates his birthday. It's just like another day for him and I feel every year, every day, guilty as neither I tried to make him celebrate nor I helped him to move on.." and looking at Khushi face which was akin to accusing, "Don't look at me that way, KhushiJi! I tried but not very much deep... It's just that, whenever I tried, it opens up the old wounds and starts paining a lot! To the world I've moved on but only I know that I haven't and putting a pretense as like that. That is also, just for Chotey. It's not a matter to move on that easily! He wanted me not to cry and I'm just doing that for him..." she added and started sobbing.
Khushi was beside Anjali within seconds, enclosing her in her arms.
"Di! Di, don't cry! Di, please... Di..."
Anjali nodded, wiping away her tears.
"Sorry, Di," Khushi said, feeling slightly guilty for opening the topic.
"Arey, koi baat nehi! Hum bas aise hi.. Thik hai, chhodiye! What were you asking? Chotey's favourite food, right?" Anjali asked, sniffing.
Khushi nodded.
"Kheer! He likes it very much but doesn't eat that much as I or none can make it like Maa! I was surprised as he ate the Kheer you made on your first day here."
Khushi almost smiled proudly.
Anjali touched her shoulder and said: "Khushiji, I know Chotey can be hard and unpredictable at times, but I know, in fact, we all know, you are the best thing ever happened to Chotey." smiling a little, "And I know, he knows it! Bohot pyaar karta hai woh, aapse." she trailed her fingers over Khushi's hair hair. She then placed an affectionate kiss on Khushi's forehead and moved out of the kitchen, leaving Khushi in deep thoughts.
Does he really love me?
Then why this much hate he's directing towards me?
Why did he marry me just like that?
Were those stares before our marriage true ya, those after?
Everyone believes he loves me and I too did, then what changed?
What happened?
He doesn't look good... True...
I can feel it.
Always being in some other world..
Sometimes he would stare me like those days...Then would glare at me.. Kyun?
Something's wrong.
I have to find out!
With that resolve, Khushi finished her remaining work and moved out of the kitchen.
When she entered her room as always Arnav was working with her sautan. At that time, she really wished, she hadn't sung that line: "Laptop se inko hai kardo sagai, office mein rehke ban jaaye jamaayi.."
She chuckled at the memory yearning attention from Arnav. She ignored him and went inside the bathroom to freshen up. When she came out, Arnav was all set to go to bed, err, recliner.
She almost felt bad thinking that she snatched his bed, but hey, he snatched everything from her! Everything! I'm playing fair, she consoled herself.
She walked to the bed. Then, rustling the blanket, she moved inside the quilt and settled comfortably. Rubbing her cheek again the fabric of the pillow, she dug her head deeper into it and closed her into ecstasy. She laid there for a while, then, she felt a gaze over her and it didn't take her a second to guess who it'd be. Her Arnavji.
She peeked slightly and saw him. Standing in front of the closet, with clenched fist, hardened jaw line and turbulent gaze. Same as of Diwali night.
She felt herself growing hot. Her heartbeats quickened. Her breath hitched. Her palms got clamy. She knew her change could be easily noted, so she frowned and covered herself fully with her pink blanket, welcoming the sleep.
~
Morning rays woke her up. She sat up groggily, rubbing her eyes as a small child. Then, she noticed the actual child like figure sleeping on the recliner. She got up and moved to him. Running her hands into his hair, she bought her hands down and caressed his cheek. Kneeling down beside him, she whispered in his ears: "Janamdin mubarak, Laad Governer."
Astonishing her, he turned to face her, with closed eyes. Rubbing his stubble covered cheeks on her palm, he mumbled: "Khushi..."
Khushi was so much shocked with his activities and his mumble. This added another dozen of doubts in her mind.
Entangling herself from him, she slipped away not wanting to create any awkward situation.
~
Whole day Khushi acted normally. She didn't wish him, too, even though all of her wanted to wish him. At times, she caught Arnav staring at her like an unsatisfied child.
Wish we had a normal life... I'd have at least wished you...
~
At night, Khushi with a porcelain bowl in her hand, entered their room and saw him working with his laptop, again!
Yeh kabhi nahi badlega! Janamdin ho ya duniya ki aakri din! She made a face.
Silently she made her way towards him. Keeping the bowl in the table, she said: "Di ne kaha aapko dene ki."
Arnav looked at the bowl and her. She quickly turned away.
"Okay." he muttered and took the bowl and eyed the content. His face hardened. "Who did this?" he asked angrily.
For a minute, Khushi was tempted to say Anjali's name, but she brushed off the temptation and said bravely: "Me."
"Who the hell asked you to?"
"What's there to ask? I did some and gave it to you." Khushi shrugged.
"I don't want it." he spat.
"It's your birthday. Don't refuse. Please" Khushi, with a soft voice said.
"I said I don't want! You don't understand, do you?"
"I really don't understand, Arnavji.." she finally blurted out. At his questioning glance, she continued, "what has happened to you."
Arnav narrowed his eyes at her.
"It's that, you are so confused. You are always thinking of something; doing it with an uncertainty which you didn't have until our marriage." Khushi sighed.
Arnav was about to say something, but Khushi stopped him raising her hand. "Don't deny it. It'd be a big, fat, white lie if I ever say that I don't know you. May be I don't know more about Arnav or Chotey but ASR, I know him very well. In his world there's no place for uncertainty."
Arnav looked with all types of surprised expressions.
"And now, you aren't being Arnav nor ASR. What happened? Kya aap mujhse nehi keh sakte?" she tried to cup his cheek, but he angrily pushed away her hand, roaring: "Don't touch me!"
It stung her soul, very deeply, but she decided to act indifferent.
Raising her hands up, she said: "Accha, baba, accha. I won't! But, what happened? The man I met at the fashion show; the man who drew a contract between him and me; the man who helped in the marriage issue of his brother and my sister was so clear-headed. He may think after doing something but never do with uncertainty. Par, jis din humari shaadi hui uske saath, woh thik nehi hai. Har pal, kuch na kuch usse pareshaan karte hai. Aur mujhe pata nehi, us waja kya hai. Kaash woh humse.." she trailed off.
Arnav looked at her as if he was in dilemma.
She then continued in a playful tone: "So, the moral of the story is, I don't like the Laad Governer being like this. With this state of mood, he isn't even responding my antics. I can't irritate him. You know, it's very stressing."
Suddenly her tone changed into seriousness "Bring out the ASR, Arnavji. Think about the problem with his head and take decisions with your heart. Sab accha hoga!" she gently patted his cheek and went out of the room.
This was the most she has talked to him in months but she believes it is worth it.
With the speed she came out, she took a U-turn and hid behind the door, effectively away from his eyes.
She didn't know for how long she stood there watching him pace the length of the room, seemingly racking his brain.
And at the crack of dawn, she saw him sit at the recliner, sighing deeply. Then, saw him, taking the porcelain bowl in his hands, opening it and stirring the contents. Then, with deep exhale, he ate the Kheer, wiping the lone tear emerged from his eyes.
She has no idea what caused the tear but she understood well, that, 'Arnav' has emerged from the darkness. And she believes that he will pull ASR back into action, who would give her hopes and hints for the futureless life she's living now.
But, above that, she was immensely happy that she took the first step. First step in steadying their relationship.
-
Candace.
Jodha Akbar
Anupamaa
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