IPKKND SS: Providence C15p109 Conclude LINK TO NEW SS ADDED P115! - Page 59

Chapter 15 Conclude

Some element of this chapter is inspired by Faraz

"Tu mohabbat say koi chaal toh chal, haar jaanay ka hosla hai mujhay"

Aap ka saath toh dil ne manga tha Arnavji par dil dukh tha bhi hai .. aur darr ta bhi hai.." (I wanted to be with you but I also could not risk investing so much of myself in you and then having my heart broken again. My heart not only longs for you but it also aches and falls to fear.

Hurt he could never comprehend he knew that but what about everything else.

I don't expect you too trust me all at once or forgive me completely Khushi you know that. When he saw that she still failed to react, that she was denying that love that was so apparent to him in her eyes he let go of her hand.

"You are still too bitter about our past and you're punishing me otherwise why would you even bring this up after last night.?"

She did not respond which spoke in its self, she just walked away but he had something to say, walking away was her choice but not his.

I suppose this is only fair .. you waited two years for me .. I'll wait 20 for you Khushi if that's what it will take..
...

That was it and wait he did because Khushi had left that night and this what Arnav Singh Raizadas longing looked like after that night.

..

She had left that evening and the only time she looked back was at Nani whom she promised she would always be there for when she was needed. She would visit her every day if need be because she wasn't leaving Nani she was leaving Arnav and that too for only reasons she could understand in depth.

...

The morning that followed after Khushi's leave was a gloomy one. There was a cold sensation of loss in the air and silence at that. As Nani wheeled herself to towards Arnav who was standing at the French doors in the lounge looking into the garden she felt awful for her grandson.

Because Arnav was sincere in his attempt to resolve his issue with Khushi. Fate was a horrible thing at times and a grandmother had watched her children suffer greatly at the hands of it.

She looked up at him, the side of his profile visible from beside him. Arnav would always be Arnav stood silently with his coffee on looking the garden. Silence was his refuge at he most difficult of times.

"Jaa kar le aaon use.." (Go get her.) She spoke like a grandmother did.
He was so deep in thought, or trance or oblivion whatever It was that he failed to notice the approach of another until he heard those words.

That wasn't the answer and if it was he wouldn't have been standing here.

He turned to his grandmother and smiled regardless of how he felt, she was a beautiful soul and she had passed on some of her good traits to her grand son if not all of them.

There was reassurance in his act as he put her hand over Nani's shoulder as he walked passed confessing that it was now his turn to wait on his love.

..

(Day 2)

Like any test of endurance there was determination, belief, heart to ones commitment to begin with and this is exactly what Arnav had to begin with and above all that he had love.

..

Khushi would always, always live up to her word and as per her promise to Nani, Khushi returned the very next evening to Raizada house for Nani and the fact that it was just for Nani she made clear at every given opportunity.

He was dressed in blue that evening, a shirt she loved to see him in a colour she loved on him she wondered if he had done it on purpose or whether he had done it all on purpose.

Khushi had chosen the evening because Arnav usually spent his evenings in his room working she would be able to see Nani and than leave.

It was quiet a different surrounding and it wasn't just the blue Arnav dressed in it was everything.

When Khushi walked into the house it was apparent that it wasn't anything like the norm.

There were little children to be seen around the Raizada lounge all of whom she recognised. They were the children from Khushi's evening tutoring. They seemed to be all in their own element, cutting, sticking, having fun one of them approached Khushi and Khushi could not ignore.

The little girl who looked up at Khushi with the cutest smile and brightest eyes looked so happy and like children had a habit of doing they bought happiness to the saddest of faces.

Khushi who kneeled to the floor after a moment of noticing the child smiled because that was the most natural thing to do in the moment when the little girl gave Khushi a hug.

We missed you.. she said handing Khushi a make shift brightly coloured card.

It was the most adorable thing and it was soon that Khushi realised that the little children all of them were making cards for her.

"It's the only thing I could think of... they're a little too young for databases and business & it was their idea actually. They miss you.. (His eyes telling of how they included him too)

His voice never failed to leave her a little off guard and she wasn't sure if he was just saying this to try and make a mends or this was real but she didn't respond. Nor did she look at him, just asked for Nani whom was in her room he told her.

He watched her leave towards the staircase knowing that she hadn't closed the doors on him completely and she would return, she would if his love was as pure as it felt.

(Day 6)

Living without Khushi convincing himself that he would win her over with time was okay for the first day or so but the reality around him was the darkest the deepest and the most lonely of kings when he was alone.

Maybe being in love with someone so much did this to you. You looked for them in all moments. Whether he was after a coffee or picking his suit for the day, the little things were the worst and even the likes of Hp could see that his sahab was missing his wife.

"Khushi there isn't enough milk in this" .. he said his eyes on the laptop screen as he spoke not realising that it wasn't Khushi hovering around the room it was Hp.

But Hp himself was a good soul, he simply looked at his boss with understanding, reassuring him that she would be here later to visit nani. It was the smallest of things from a man who looked after his house but sometimes that is all one needed.

Hp was right Khushi did arrive her own time to see Nani and all Arnav could do was catch glimpses of her as he walked past his grandmothers room too and from the kitchen to top up his coffee that evening. This was sincerely so much more difficult than one would have known. Your love so close yet so distant at the same time. What he would have to get an eye lock at that time and convey his heart.

(Day 10)

She still wore her mangulstra she wore her Sindoor, she walked into his house whenever she wished freely to see his grandmother yet he had no right over her the Arnav Singh Raizada with the dormant in love husband was getting to his brink.

Today like all other days he watched her simply ignore him once again but he could no longer take the anguish. He had been watching intently speak to the neighbour, speak to Hariprakash, spend time with Nani but even though he was present he was invisible but not any more.

He grabbed her by the arm when she tried to walk past him to leave that house that evening ..

"This is my home, you are my wife, the mangalsutra you wear around your neck is for me as is that sindhoor the least you could do is acknowledge me whatever your state of our relationship."

"Hame takleef ho rahin hai.. " - (You're hurting me) she said in a strained tone of voice.. her eyes still committed to not looking at him, not showing feeling. He could not ignore the look of pain on her expression and let go as he realized his proximity to her and his hold upon her.

He stepped away instantly, regretting that as she scurried past.. what had he done.

(Day 14)

He'd done enough to drive her away completely he thought. Hurting her physically was the worst thing he could have done. He had very little hope to see her again after this and so it should have been for that was the last thing a woman like Khushi deserved. His own mind and heart chipped away at him he decided that maybe it was not to be. He concentrated on his work, because that was one of his traits to busy himself in work to avoid dealing with his heart and work he did. When Khushi made an unexpected visit to Raizada house ASR was caught off guard.

His weakness, his vulnerability on display for all to see now, when Khushi visited that day she expected things to be awkward but she knew him well. He had never lifted a finger on her during their marriage he wouldn't intentionally it was his heart that was reacting and with that she was able to go back to Raizada house to visit Naniji only she came across something unexpected.

A very disarrayed version of Arnav singh Raizada, he looked out of shape, he looked, unwell, busy. There was a strain in him that only a wife could recognize and Nani's words were not just dramatic Arnav Singh Raizada was not himself. Something in Khushi who saw him for herself from a distance gave way.

He was in the middle of a video conference when he watched his laptop being closed abruptly, the last person he thought he would see took him by the hand leadingly walked him up the stairs of his home, into his room and into his washroom.

She took out from the drawer his medication, and poured water, after which she opened up another drawer and pulled out a razor. The man in the mirror reflection did not look like her husband, nor was his health the way her husband maintained.

"Apna khyal rakhyiyey .." (Look after yourself.. )

He looked at her with wise eyes that was it that is all he wished for. To see that love in her eyes for him.

If he felt his heart get heavy that hers surely would be too..

Would she just walk off and if she did another day he would wait for her ..

"Bas kuch hein din hue Arnavji.. (It's been what a few days..)

...hamare doh saal ka .." (Think of my two years .. )

She lost words she swallowed the lump in her throat and before he could see her cry she left.

He looked into the mirror and sighed before his posture sunk over the wash-basin.

Why did it feel like It was well and truly over.

..

Whilst he took a moment there Khushi took a moment around just out the room. She closed her eyes but tears seemed to flow.

When Arnav finally did walk of the room Khushi walked into him was a surprise. It was embrace like no other.

I can't be as cold hearted as you ..Arnavji.. she said as she sunk into his arms ..her words were a muffle and it took him a moment to realize the implications.

From a distance a grandmother watched her children reunite for yet another time & this time it seemed like would be forever -, Providence indeed was strange thing.

...

Thank you Note : Okay guys so that's it.

I know it isn't a lengthy end but sometimes less is more ..which i hope you agree on 😕

To tell you the truth I was going to end this SS on a waiting Arnav but then I changed my mind. I don't know if I did the right thing or not but now I wrote this version I thought I would share it with you. Otherwise it was going to be an in love waiting Arnav for his Khushi with no definite answer to whether she came back or not for the reader so I will let you imagine that (Please don't ask me to right an alternative ending,..lol

In some ways i think this is nice though because Khushi was always madly in love with her husband so it would have been sad for her if It went the other way also like to see it as Khushi's magnificence a lady shining through in this and Arnavs heart beyond his flaws .. Leave you with that thought..

I hope you enjoyed this story and if not at least some aspect of it. I had fun writing it. )

I did ask if you guys about what you would like to read next so feel free to let me know but I know you guys don't mind the stuff I come up with so I'll probably go ahead and write the odd ones shots that have been on my mind and then if anything you guys say strikes a cord I will let you know. Please keep reading following commenting and sharing.