Unthinkable Thought: LAST PART PAGE 41 - Page 14

When Angad came back from office around nine that night, Kripa was sitting on the sofa. Her eyes were moist as she sat in a large gray sweatshirt and a pair of fitted, faded jeans. Her hair was carelessly pulled into a bun at the back of her head and the tears were now sliding down her cheeks with Angad's presence.

She stood up, dropping the phone on the floor, without bothering to pick it up. "Your dinner is in the kitchen, if you need it you can warm it up." She didn't even care to wipe her cheeks as her tears slip into the corners of her mouth. "Good night."

He watched her leave in utter shock. He'd never seem Kripa this broken, falling apart like this. He'd never yelled at her and nor had he ever before seen her so sacred of him. She was scared of him since this afternoon. When he'd expected to yell at her and maybe tell her she loved him, she didn't. Instead left him with the bitter taste of the truth that clearly stated that she still loved his brother, her first and only love, Nishant Khanna. But he would still see to her and say sorry, make sure she had her dinner, because he knew she didn't.

He didn't bother to knock, simply walked in with a tray in his hands. Se was sitting in the warmth of her bed, the fire burning in the fire place, Bach's music playing in the background and a book in her hands, above the pillow that rested on her legs.

First he set the tray of food on the table beside the bed. Then without a thought a care he took the book from her, picked up the beautiful bookmark and marked the book, set it aside.

She was looking down at the bronze colored pillow, tracing a figure on its patterns. The ring wasn't in her hands again, he noticed looking at them, then holding them in place.

"I'm sorry." Finally, she looked at him with the apology. "I shouldn't have been angry this morning."

He hated himself at the moment. He had been the one to make the mistake and here he was sitting hours later accepting an apology from his wife who he should have been loving to make up to. But then who said he'd accepted. He hadn't refused either.

"You should go to bed now." She shifted taking her hands back and laid down.

Bach's music was still playing and above it she heard the crackling of the wood burning in fire. The way she was burning with the warmth of Angad's breath against her cheek when he kissed her. But she held enough strengthen to allow him to know she wasn't moved by it. And, like she'd wanted to at his touch, she didn't close her eyes wishing for more. Instead accepting she was never getting anything more.

"Does that mean you've forgiven me?" she asked not turning but closing her eyes when he sat up again. He left the room leaving the food there.

After that kiss he didn't touch her once. Instead he stayed away from her, far enough to where she could reach out for him but still not be able to get a hold of him.

On the morning of September 11 she watched the news, laying in bed. The morning was gray and dark, ironically. She'd been awake since five in the morning and couldn't find the will of getting out of bed to shower and prepare Angad's breakfast. She listened, to her most hated president, Bush, announce the names of the people who'd died today five years ago. When Nishant's name was finally announced she was able to closed the TV and turn her face into the pillow for another long cry.

She missed him, it was that simple. You didn't need to love someone, a man, romantically to miss him because he was such a great friend, who died to early. Before his time and without making a mistake. The man had never done wrong to anyone and never would have. He loved her unconditionally, when he knew well she didn't love him. He knew she loved someone else, but he didn't know who. He told her he would never force her into anything. He'd given her the right to break their engagement and leave him the second she'd wanted to. But she never did. There was no point in doing so.

Angad would have never loved her knowing she left his brother for him. And, she was ready to forget him for Nishant. To keep Nishant happy because he'd kept her happy. But she never got the chance. Today she laid in bed alone, at the early hour of eight, crying for him. A friend she'd lost to never gain back again.

Angad passed her room to go down stairs when he heard her muffled cries. He opened the door and walked into the room. She was laying on her stomach, bawling in the pillow. Quickly, he took her shoulder and forced her to moved to her back. Her face was red, her eyes were puffy, and there on her beautiful face, he saw tear stains.

She turned her face into the side of his leg to hide the non-stop tears. Sadly he lowered himself into the bed and held her there.

When she settled down almost twenty minutes later, she lifted her face and rubbed her nose. His shirt had gotten wet from her tears, like the pillow she'd cried on earlier.

"I'm sorry for crying like a baby, Angad." She turned to the other side again. "Yet, thank you for letting me do so. I'm okay now, you can go. I'm not coming to the office today and nor can I make you a meal. I'm sorry for that as well." Her face turned into the pillow again and she let out a long breath. She hadn't slept the entire night because of horrifying nightmares, now she wanted to turn and take Angad in her arms and go to sleep for a few hours.

She turned and he was still there, looking at her. His arms wrapped around her tightly and he pushed her face, gently, into his chest. "Go to sleep for sometime, Kripa. You need it." Those wonderful, large hands patted her head when she cuddled against him, closed her eyes and went to sleep right away.

When she awoke hours later his lips were pressed to her head and he was sleeping himself. Clearly he hadn't bothered to sleep the night before himself. She wasn't the only one who'd lost someone. He'd lost a brother he knew much longer than she didn't. And, his parents had lost a son too early. So many children had lost their father, so many wives had lost their husbands. So many sisters had lost their brother. She wasn't the only who'd lost someone.

Whoever that disgusting man was, who'd planned this event, would never life in peace. And, nor would that stupid, idiot, monkey, Bush. The county had been in crisis when his father was running it and it was still going thought them as he continued running it. She'd been shocked enough to know he'd won the elections from Kerry. She knew there was a scandal somewhere and he was involved with his relatives who were running Florida. And, curse those idiots who voted for him begin in Texas because he was from there. He wasn't winning a prize to know if his people loved him. He was going to rule the God dammed county for the next four full years. How she wished that plane would have attacked D.C. and killed him as well, she wouldn't be this sad now. Instead she would have been celebrating that he was gone never to come back. But he was still alive right now and eating somewhere while another man or woman died in Iraq because of him. That son of a….

The thought stopped when Angad moved his arms around her tighter. She moved, she had him there right now and it was more important then wasting her energy over someone as useless as Bush. If she was ever in need, she'd rather die than asking him for help or taking his.

Angad opened his eyes and looked at her somewhat angry face, "hello. You looked so lovely sleeping I feel asleep myself. You okay now?"

She nodded and rested her forehead against his chest. "We should call mom and dad," she whispered sadly.

"Don't be sad Kripa." He lifted her face to see tears again. "Nishant would kill me by haunting my dreams if he ever found out you were crying and I wasn't able to help you stop."

"He'd kill me in the same manner." She said with a smile. "You're amazing Angad Khanna, you really are." Leaving a peck on his cheek she turned around to the other side and closed her eyes. "But I want to be alone for some more time." Understanding he left her, assured she wouldn't cry now.

Kripa managed to get out of bed around two and went to take a shower. When got down stairs dressed in a black she found lunch ready for her. She frowned not to find Angad around, he must have gone to the office. She'd hadn't been going to the office for the past two days simply because Angad had never pressurized her. But talking to June, she knew he was having a hard time with certain things she had been handling in the past few days.

She sat down and nibbled her lunch slowly. When she was done she packed her and his cloths for the next Florida's trip. Angad was supposed to go shopping with June because Kripa needed made sure that was taken care of that before they left tomorrow. But obviously he hadn't been shopping with her.

She called him then, surprised when Viola picked up his cell phone. She wasn't angry thought. She wouldn't be anymore. If Viola was coming back to him let it be and more if he wanted that.

"Hi Viola, this is Kripa. Can you do me a favor?"

"Angad's-"

"Listen," she snapped shortly at the way she took his name. "Just take him shopping he needs new shirts. I would go but I can't. Bye." She slammed the phone and left the room.

Viola looked at the phone in confusion. When Angad walked into the cabin he saw his phone in her hand.

"Why do you have my phone, Miss. Love." He greeted politely. "Did someone call?'

"Yes." She leaned over and kissed him casually, just a peck on the cheek, like a friend. "You're wife. She asked me to take you shopping for shirts."

"Did she?" He looked at her. "Did she sound angry about it?"

"Not in the beginning, but she seemed upset about something and said she didn't have time to take you so I should do that for her."

"Alright." He nodded his head. "I'm sorry about the way I behaved a few days ago. The way Kripa had been-"

"No need for an explanation. I'm sure I would have been angry myself. Kripa's married to you after all." She turned around to hide the tears that were swelling in her eyes. "I finished the run through for our show and everything seems fine. We've put together a great show."

"I'm sure we have. We're leaving tomorrow at ten from the airport. Since the security has tightened make sure you're a little early. I'll see you tomorrow."

"And you're shopping?" she asked hoping he would agree.

"I think Kripa has the right to shop for her husband without worrying about how busy she is. Viola I meant it when I said I love Kripa."

"I know. I saw it in your eyes Angad, I see it in your eyes now."

"Good, I expect that anyone should be able to look at me and tell I love Kripa very much." He placed a kiss on her forehead, "I'm sure you'll do better than me. I'll see you later." He took his phone from her and left.

Kripa finished her own packing at home and Angad's as much at he could. She had spent the day crying first over Nishant's death, then when she'd called his parents in London afterwards, and then again thinking of Angad and Viola. Maybe things would get so much easier for them both if she simply told him she loved him and allow him to deal with the rest. At least then he would be guilty to be around that Viola Love, knowing he was married and his wife loved him very much.

She wiped her tears aside and went to open the door when the bell rang, but when the door opened with her standing in the staircase she looked at Angad. "Kripa!" He yelled, then looked at her in the staircase.

He was supposed to be shopping with Viola, she mused walking down the rest of the stairs to Angad. "You're back so early?"

He ignored the question. "Did you have lunch?"

She nodded and took his coat from him, so wifely, she thought disgusted at herself and gave it back to him. "Did you need something?"

He looked at her and then caught her chin in his hands, gently. "What makes you think I always need something when I come to you?"

"Why else would you come to me, Angad? I asked Viola to make sure you finished your shopping, did you?" She stepped back from his grip and turned. "If not you better because you'll need more than a few shirts in the next week."

"I know that." He caught her arm. "If you think you look decent in all black, cool. If not go change we have something to do."

"I will not go shopping with you Angad." She jerked her arm back again. "I don't want to go anywhere today."

"You know what then, you hotheaded idiot, you will. If I have to pick you up and take you I will. You're my wife and better start behaving like one in everyday."

She shot a angry look at him, jammed an angry fist into his chest. "You know what Angad Khanna, in that case you better start acting like a damned husband in every way yourself. Ninety percent of this wonderful world still thinks the very handsome Angad Khanna is still unattached. And if not then I'll be more than glad to leave you and free you from this embarrassment named Kripa Khanna. I'm sick and tired of living like this and I'm not going for another second. Either both of us will put our acts together or we will come back from Florida in six days and call of this marriage, end it."

He blinked, he knew exactly what she was trying to tell her. He took her face in his hands but she backed away.

"I don't want you around me for sometime, Angad. Unless you want me to go mad forever. I've packed half your stuff, finish it when you want, can. Or you can go tomorrow without shirts."

He didn't shop because he was determined that Kripa would do that with him or he would never. He could shop with her at Florida, there were some excellent shops there. He finished his packing alone, he didn't need to know Kripa was in love with him. It was obvious. And because she wasn't smart enough to look at him and see that he loved him as well and nor was she intelligent enough to confess her love, he was going to torture her for a few days before taking her all to himself.

Angad made sure that their seats were together for their flight, but Kripa in front of him, got her seat changed into another part of first class. She was at the end of her wits, that stupid lady, Angad thought with a smile as he watched her slim body strode away gracefully. She would make such a great model. Maybe he would hire her for their next venture just to keep her in the office if things didn't work out during this trip. That way she would get of her endless mode of, she's an embarrassment to him.

Idiot, they both thought about each other.

Because most of the first class was empty Angad was able to move his seat and sit on the chair across.

"Hello, Mrs. Khanna." He picked up the second empty glass of wine and poured himself some, sipped, put it down, noticed she was drinking coke in the wine glass. He smiled, maybe he could seduce her with wine again. But hence, the foolish woman would wake up angry that she got drunk again. There was a problem in everything.

"You know it's not very classy to drink coke in a wine glass."

She lifted a brow sharply and looked at him coolly. "It's not very classy for us to be sitting here right now as I would hate to start another conversation. An argument rather." "It's not very classy to start an argument with in one publicly."

"In that case it's not very classy for Angad Khanna to be sitting away from his seat talking to someone else when he could be conducting a busy something right now. Woo a another lady perhaps in this flight."

"In that case, I'm very classily wooing a woman right now and she seems to be enjoying flirting with her husband very much right now."

"I'm not flirting with you Angad." She tossed back, finished her glass of coke and set it aside. "Now leave."

"No." She had picked up a book and had already begun reading it. He snatched it away. "I've been thinking about ending our marriage, Kripa."

Her eyes froze in his and a lump formed in her throat.

"I'm sure I can give you a divorce and pacifying mom and dad will be completely my responsibility. I know I haven't been able to keep you happy in the past months now. I tried but I couldn't. You deserve to be with someone who loves you and who you love."

The first tear dropped from her eye to her cheek. She quickly wiped it, smiled. "I'm so happy to hear that I'm crying." She laughed looked at the ring in her finger, then at him. "I'm glad you could finalize a decision." Another tear fell, she wiped it. "I'm sure you'll be happier without me."

"Me too." He filled his glass of wine again and left her alone. Once her was gone, she pressed her face into her hands and cried again.

Angad watched her with a frown from his seat. He wanted to go to her and say sorry for playing such a cheap joke with her but he would play it longer. Just a little longer, he thought, it would be fun making it up to her with gifts and dinners later on.

"Hi Angad." Viola sat down in front of him and smiled. "Where's Kripa?"

"She's just a little angry with me, don't worry about her. Wine?"

Kripa frowned with the tears still streaming, he was celebrating their upcoming divorce with Viola. So would she. She searched around and when found June's seat, around Angad's went to sit with her. She was having tea and chatting with a new love interest online, ended the chat when Kripa got there.

"Hi Kripa."

"Hey June." She got herself another glass of coke and drank. Alcohol would do wonderfully indeed. Enough to go yell at that tramp Viola. And maybe to tell Angad that she loved him.

"You were crying?" Angad heard her ask Kripa.

"In happiness, yes. Don't ask why."

Angad rolled his eyes and looked back at Viola, when their bottle of wine arrived. He poured some for her and clicked his glass to hers. "So what have you been doing?"

"Nothing much," she eyes him curiously. "I've been handling Dad's assignments now that he's started to stay sick so often. I have a launch to plan with Grace once I'm done with you."

"They are a compatible company to work with. They outnumbered us last year with their launch in Florida. I was determined to do better this year."

"Angad Khanna still wraps himself in competition. That's good. Challenges are fun in life."

"They are." He glanced at Kripa. "They indeed are. How's your mother?" He looked back at her and smiled at her still confused look. "Don't be confused Viola. You're still a friend and I think I can sit and have a decent conversation with you."

"I guess." She shook her head. "Mom's great. You know the typical Indian mothers worried about their daughter's marriage. She's been bothering me. I was hoping to trap you again and keep you but it seems like I was seven months late."

"You were. How about that new friend you made, what was his name, Rahul?"

"Rahul. Yes, he's a sweetheart. Mom loves him herself but I doubt he loves me." She sighed, sipped. "No one loves me."

"Oh, don't say that. You just haven't found the right person."

She nodded. "I'm glad you found Kripa. I don't like her very much, as you all know. But I admire that she stands up for what's hers." But I won't let her take you away from me.

He rolled his eyes, my foot, he thought bitterly.

Kripa walked towards their room, arms folded, fifteen feet away from him. No physical contact what-so-ever. She wouldn't let him touch her, she couldn't in fact.

"Kripa, this way." Angad said opening the door as she continued walking forward. When they entered their bags were in the room already. And, boy was it a grand room- rather an apartment in itself. "Like it?"

She straightened her look and her spine, "I'm glad it consists of two rooms."

"Yes me too." He stretched and fell on the sofa. "Now if you don't mind, would you like to come with me so we could look at the horses?"

"No I think I should stay here Angad. I'm-"

"No." He shook his head, he had to tell her. It was rude and mean of him to play such a cruel trick on her. The poor lady was dieing within herself. "Kripa," he took both her hands. "I-"

"I'll go." She took her hands back and stepped back. "Let me change into something else."

He groaned when she left.

He'd rented a wonderful sports car for the days they were going to stay here for. That rich idiot, she thought looking at the wonderful car. He opened the door for her and she sat down, smoothing her skirt. He drove through the city in full speed and without having to worry about directions.

Kripa was in Florida for the first time and she wished right away she could stay forever. It was mid-September and the day was quite warm. But the breeze that blew her hair in that rich convertible car had her cool. She saw beaches and large palm tress. Tall buildings and sky-scrapers. Blabbing about the new things she spotted non-stop.

When Angad didn't pay to much attention or looked very amused by her discoveries she stopped blabbing. Traveling was professional for him, he didn't notice things like this when traveling professional. He's stopped a long time ago. Now, when Kripa mentioned the new things, he found himself noticing things he hadn't noticed in the past years he'd been here. And, it amused him to find such great pleasure to look around for once and answer her questions when he did. He knew he felt the same way when he'd been here for the very first time alone.

At the track, everyone greeted him, horses were been trained for the upcoming races. They both walked, holding hands surprisingly, across the green grass right to the stables that were Angad's to meet a young man there. She heard the horses in the background and smelled dirt being kicked of the track as the powerful horses ran around them freely.

"Hello Mr. Khanna, nice to see you again."

"Hey Paddy. You ready to run the horse today?" He shook his hand, that was callused and hard against his hands that were used to sing papers and not ditches digging. "And, how is my girl doing?" he asked looking into the stable.

Kripa followed her gaze and saw a large black mare looking at Angad and Paddy with joyous eyes. When his gaze shifted to Kripa she looked away and tugged back at Angad's hand. He was too busy talking to Paddy to notice her nervousness.

"Come on Kripa. Let's take a look at her." Taking her hand he dragged her into the stable. He left her hand and walked closer to the beauty and ran a hand on her nose. "How are you beautiful? You ready for your big race in less than three hours?"

When she nodded as a response to Angad's questions he merely laughed while Kripa was amazed at their connection.

"I was hoping the same." He gave a nice pat to her nose and looked back at Kripa. "Why are you standing far away Kripa. Come here."

"I just didn't want to disturb the reunion." Ignoring the knot in her stomach she moved forward nervously and stood so Angad's shoulder was blocking her a little. She was beautiful without a doubt, but the thought didn't put her at any calm. She took his sleeve when the mare's head tossed towards Angad, he laughed.

"Alright, let's take a good look at you." He walked to one side, picked up each hoof and gave a nod. "They've taken good care of you, darling." He ran a hand on her back, "I have confidence in you. You're going to win today, right."

Kripa was amused at the comfort he shared with the horse. The horse moved a little forward towards Kripa as Angad moved towards her as well.

"It's hard to keep him from running before the gun shot." With a sigh he walked towards Kripa, but stopped when the horse moved towards her. There was a cry somewhere around the track which startled the mare, and he lifted his feet and threw them back down. Kripa fainted dead away.

When she started to come back, an arm was supporting her and something cool and wet was being forced through her lips. She swallowed and opened her eyes. "What happened?"

"I should ask you that Kripa." His voice came to her angry at her state but a hand stroked her cheek.

"I don't know. I've never been in so much sun before, maybe that's why." She looked up at Angad's frowning face. He seemed to believe her.

"Just lay still." He held her shoulders down so her head fell back on his legs when she tried to sit up. "Thanks Paddy." He took the water from him and smiled. "I can handle it from here."

"Alright. You take care missy. And, Angad don't worry about it, just keep her away from the sun."

"Thank you." She said to Paddy, then noticed they were still in the stable, but far away from the horse. He was inside a stall again. "I'm sorry Angad I caused a scene."

"You were perfect and then just fell." And, nothing, absolutely nothing in his life had ever horrified him to this extent his heartbeat was yet to return to normal. "Let's go sit you in a shade somewhere else."

"Yes." She let out a breath, he would think of her to be a fool to be scared of a horse. With his help she stood up. After a few moments when she was stable again, the mare put his head out again and shook the stall door. With a muffled cry, Kripa threw her arms around Angad's neck and clung.

It took him a second to put it together, then he pulled her away. "For God's sake, Kripa, why didn't you tell me you were afraid of horses?"

"I'm not." She nodded her head.

"Oh shut-up." He scooped her up and people looked at him.

"Angad, don't carry me. We've both had enough embarrassment for a lifetime."

"Be quite," he ordered. When he thought they were far enough from the stables he set her down under a palm tree. "If you had enough brains to tell me that you were scared of horses, you wouldn't have shaved ten years off of my life." With a swear he sat down beside her and took out a packet of Marlboro Light.

"The last thing I need from you is a lecture." She looked at him in surprise. "You smoke?" She snatched the box from him and set it aside. "If you don't want me to kill you, you won't smoke again."

He warped his arm around her shoulder and kissed her temple. "Only if you tell me why you're scared of horses. And if you were, you should have told me. I wouldn't have forced you."

"I thought I was over the fear."

"Well you were wrong." He stroked her hair, then dropped it to take her hand. She would have taken it away, but like him, her heart was still to return to its normal rhythm. "Tell me about it."

"It's silly." She said with a nod.

"Tell me anyways."

"When I was around ten I wanted to learn how to ride a horse. So Dad found someone who would teach me in a small fee. I had learned and I could ride properly within enough time, but then one day I don't know what got into the horse, he threw me over and ran over me."

"Oh god." He simply tightened his finger over her hand.

"I was lucky then. Just a few broken ribs and all. I never went around one again. And, I made a million excuses with Nishant when he used to ask me out here. By now I thought I would have gotten over it. I was wrong." She sighed and looked at him, the patients eyes.

"It's better to tell one then stopping their hearts." He said in a murmur.

She looked up at him, "maybe." She plucked grass from the ground.

"More secrets?" With a sigh, he took her chin in his hand and turned her face to his. She was unable to resist at the moment when her cheeks were still pale, her hair flying, and her eyes moist with a sheen layer of tears. "You shouldn't think of what people thinking of you so much, Kripa. I know thing about you that others don't and I still like you."

"Yeah that's why you're calling our marriage off." She plucked another blade of grass from the ground with a frown.

"I'm not." He mumbled, turned her face. Unable to hold the desire within him any longer, lowered his mouth to hers. He tasted, he nibbled, he explored. She lifted a hand to his chest to stop him, but her finger curled into his shirt and she kept him there, pulled him closer.

She'd never known how peaceful and safe his kisses made her feel. This one was different from when she'd kissed him in the office. Was different from when he'd kissed her in the board room. She felt safe with him even as excitement over took her. She didn't know what it was that made her feel this way. The way his hand held her and his fingers caressed her. Or the way his lips held softly over hers.

He wanted to move her into his lap and cradle and sooth. Cuddle her against him and tell her over and over again that he loved her so dearly. He'd never had such a silly urge with any of the women he'd seen before. But then he'd never really loved anyone of them.

He drew her away, but kept her close. "I'll take you back to the hotel."

"Hotel?" She nodded her head and looked at him. "I promise I'll be fine. I want to see the races. I mean they won't hurt me from far away, would they?"

"No."

"I know!" She smiled and knew with Angad at her side she could face anything. "Come on we didn't drive so far to go back." She stood up and held out her hand, then took it back. "Make sure I don't see you smoking again. God I can't believe you smoke! Yuck!"

He rolled his eyes and stood up, jamming the box in his pocket for the moment. "I won't again."

"Good. Now let's go get seats." Taking his arm they walked away.

Hey,

Sorry about being late! I'll post two parts tomm for both FF's.

Hugs and Kisses,

Neha 😊