Hello everyone.. 😃 Me is back! Yeah, kya karoon. I'm possessed.. 🤪
Nah! Making up for delayed updates..
Next one on coming Sunday, if all goes well.. 😛 Toh, you know what to do, right?! 😉
@ Silent readers: Please don't ask for PM updates if you're not being regular here..
Warning: I know most of you are expecting a happywala reunion.. But well, had to get somethings out of the way.. The first of many to come..
Arohi/Rosy's POV on what happened in the past - Part 1.. 😉
Long Chapter hai.. (Darn! I should really stop saying that, now..)
Okay! And here's something special..
A VM dedicated to Arjun & Rosy by Tahi (despicable_me).. ❤️
It's gorgeous! 😳
PC, seksy.. I owe you one, behna.. Thanks a ton! 🤗
[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nvilp_2a23c[/YOUTUBE]
Read on..
Theme song for this one.. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQDumqrv9lY
Chapter 29
A little while later, Rosy walked to the door and stepped out towards a bench overlooking the tranquil night sea thinking back over Karan's question..
Who was Arjun to her? Did she really have a satisfactory answer to it? Perhaps not..
She hadn't been able to answer the question that had been bothering her for years..
Why had she given up on everything dear to her for the man she could never have? He was in love with and happily married to Roshni, why then had she failed to erase his memories from her heart?
The answers rang loud and clear in her head and a trail of tears trickled down her cheeks upon realising that she could never nail down what he meant to her.. Maybe it would have been easier 5 years ago, but after all she had been through, she knew she couldn't answer it, no matter how hard she tried.
And then inevitably, Rosy felt a familiar knot tightening in her chest as she recalled the traumatic experiences. Making those decisions had been excruciating but what had broken her later was the fact that they were all rendered futile in the end.
Paaya woh naa chaaha, chaaha woh naa paaya
Jiske peeche bhaage, woh saaya hai re saaya
Kya kya raste dhoonde! kya kya dukh na paaya!
Par saaya thehra saaya.. ke haathon mein na aaya..
Rosy looked at the starry sky's reflection falling on the dark waters ahead of her and drew her knees closer. She had tried everything within her capacity to move past him, to forget him and yet she still stood at the crossroads they had parted, 5 years ago.
Even today, every moment spent with him was fresh in her memory; every word exchanged with rang aloud in her ears. Their bittersweet relationship which was an inseparable part of her still possessed her heart.
Gin.ta rehta tare.. lotun main angaare..
Khud se ladhta phirta yeh jag ko thokar mare..
Kheenche-kheenche baithe, baithe-baithe bhaage
Na sunta khud ke aage, yeh pagal ho gaya re..
Her one rash decision had brought about her downfall and tonight, as always she reflected back upon it questioning herself. Maybe her life wouldn't be the way it was today; dark, gloomy, marred by tragedy and without a ray of hope had it not been for destiny's cruel games.
He was the best thing that had happened to her and she had been the unfortunate one to have to throw away her only salvation.
She put her head on her knees and sobbed silently. As lonely, aimless and wandering, her life was, he was all that had ever mattered to her; her heart's most coveted desire which had always been beyond her reach..
Paaya woh naa chaaha, chaaha woh naa paaya
Jiske peeche bhaage, woh saaya hai re saaya
Kya kya raste dhoonde! kya kya dukh na paaya!
Par saaya thehra saaya ke haathon mein na aaya..
He had walked into their lives, unannounced as the young boy who had slowly broken down her guard back when she was distraught over her parent's separation. He was the one who had often brought out the worst and best in her with his sarcastic taunts and unfaltering support. He was her pillar of strength and yet her worst critic when she did something to tick him off the wrong way.
Arjun had been her constant companion throughout her childhood and youth, with whom she had shared her life for nearly 10 years back then. And hence, though slightly taken aback at first with the new budding emotions for him, it had only seemed natural that she was falling for him.
She had hidden her newly discovered secret from him and everyone upon realising it. She wasn't sure how everyone would react to it; from her father and friends, Ayesha and Roshni who had been a part of her shared journey with Arjun right through their childhood.
Most of all, she feared his reaction to the disclosure.
The fear of rejection that usually troubles every budding virgin love had gripped her too. She was afraid of losing him, because no matter what, she couldn't imagine a life without him being by her side. The irony of the situation she had gotten herself into didn't let her sleep a wink for months tormenting her mind.
Finally mustering all courage she had, Arohi had finally decided to confront her feelings for him and reveal her well-kept secret to her best friend. To her disappointment, Arjun had to leave for an assignment to Mumbai for a couple of months urgently.
Those few days without him around had tested the depth of her newly formed feelings for him. On one hand she wished to spend the rest of her life with him. But the dark part of her, hidden deep within resurfaced right then compelling her to rethink her decision.
Just when she had been fighting her conflicting thoughts, her stepfather Edwin D'costa had paid the Gupte's a visit.
The naive and teenage Arohi who had once blamed him for her parent's separation was wheeled back into time and unfortunately, the dark and bitter side of her had rose to the surface.
Her mother had taken her along after her parent's divorce and she was forced to adjust to a new lifestyle, a new home and to a new father. Those were also the days, when Arohi was compelled to transform into Rosanna D'costa against her will.
Having lived amidst a family which was bound by affectionate relationships, she was suddenly left all alone. Without her aunts, uncle, Ayesha and her father around, the playful and chirpy Arohi had hidden herself behind a cold mask of indifference.
Since she was only a school going teenager back then, faced with the dilemma of having to adjust to a new family away from her dear father, the seeds of rebellion had begun sprouting then. Even after she was reconciled with her father, the dark and brooding Rosanna had refused to leave her alone.
During her stay with her mother and stepfather, her relationship with her mother was also severely affected. Initially she had even blamed her mother for taking her away from her father and his family.
However later, when she began to witness her mother's happiness and satisfaction as she engrossed herself in her work and new family, she found her resistance slowly melt away.
Her mother, being a theatre artist had given up her career and her passion to tend to her family. Though Arohi had reasoned with herself and convinced her that her mother had done the right thing back then by picking her family over her passion, her perceptions slowly began to change.
She watched on as her mother got herself involved in numerous social commitments and training batches of students in various arts, Arohi happened to realise that it was the real her..
Never before had she seen her mother being as happy and satisfied as she was then. The sudden and apparently pleasant changes in her mother's life life bothered her immensely.
It pained the teenage Arohi to accept that her mother's happiness lay in being away from her father and left a deep impact on her mind. Later, when she was reunited with her father, Arohi had also realised the adverse consequences of her mother's decision.
Her father often hid his loneliness and the hollow left behind by her mother's exit from his life, but she hadn't missed it. She had often seen him standing in front of her mother's picture wordlessly and it hurt her to watch him lead a despaired life without a life partner while her mother was happy and satisfied in her second marriage.
Years later, she grew up to be an independent young woman, capable of facing life head on, compassionate and rebellious, both at once. Her heart held a treasure of love for her dear ones, but she seldom displayed more than what was required.
The passing years had soured her, shaken her faith in love and commitments. And the more she thought upon it, she came to realise that she was very close to being an exact replica of her mother.
Her passion for work drove her to the extent of risking her life often, without bothering about her loved ones back at home. It wasn't that she didn't care about them, but there were times when she willingly ended up being reclusive and reckless, wanting to prove a point to herself and the others.
Due to the cultural differences in her upbringing, she had never really lived in a normal household. She hadn't had a mother who would take interest in her dreams, affirm her womanhood and discipline her when she wavered. Her life lacked the one individual whose hands would have molded and shaped her into being a better person.
Though her father's affection and Arjun's companionship had been the pillars of Arohi's strength, she had missed out on a mother's unconditional love and guidance all her life. And that had affected the very core of her existence.
****
Arohi had been stunned out her wits when her father had approached her with a marriage proposal, while Arjun was away. She had outrightly dismissed it, expressing her lack of interest in it. But realising that her reckless and partly selfish behaviour was affecting her father deeply, she knew it was time to make a decision.
She wasn't ready for a marriage and the mere thought of being with a stranger freaked her out. She tried reasoning with herself and came up with unsatisfactory answers each time. She couldn't break it to her father that she was afraid of abandoning her husband and family, the way her mother had.
After days and nights of contemplation on her part, despite all reasoning and her convictions, she couldn't prepare herself for a marital relationship.
With anyone, other than him..
It was only when she realised that she had inevitably involved Arjun into her thought process that she decided to face the truth for once.
Arjun was the only one, who probably knew her inside out, could handle her temper tantrums and tame her mind when she strayed. In those little moments she spent with him, all her insecurities and self deprecating thoughts would cease to exist. Their prolonged aimless conversations, his determined and inspirational outlook towards life and his unadulterated affection for her and her family stole a part of her heart each time.
She pushed all her wavering thoughts to the back of her mind and began counting days for him to get back home. She had to talk to him.
She needed her friend's views on a decision that was to alter her life. And she needed to know if the man she had fallen in love with was willing to make her a part of his life.
****
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Edited by _Mohabbatgirl_ - 11 years ago
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