CONGRATULATIONS!!!
M shattered dat its finishing...KDHI
Ne'er da unres!
Fineee I will UNRES, because:
1. This is your last thread (before da longish brake..KDHI)
2. I love shattered more dan ILUD, and my lazy behind would like to remind you just how much...
So a journey through Luna(tics) reasons for lau-ing Shattered:
1. Shattered gives me goosebumps, cause
M tink dis b da more scandalous den Scandalous, more sinful den Sins, and more secretive den Secrets.
(vachan hai mujhe no troll language until the end of the post, nau!)
And then there is that 1st promo.
So many expectation...such an un-spectacular performance. I love the photos in the banner (lol), him in the rain, that photograph. I feel this story will love up to all that and more.
2. I like that the sheesh mahal is back! And what an epic time of return 2 years anniversary ya?
3. In true expel style..the dhak dhaks are back..! The lady looks gorgeous even if she doesn't belong in her new "role" yet.
4. I love that the SKD's are back, the trust the belief, hard words to digest, now I get why this is probably not where it all began. There has to be a story, one thats creeping in the background.
5. It gives me the 1920s gatsby feel in the beginning, with all her statements about the high society..and their twisted way. Also that "he" has conveniently disappeared, and she is looking for him. And her playing an "integral" part in all this..what sort of alternative universe are we in?
6. I am trying not to take bait on all your clues, just cause I know you will LOL at my presumptions later. Its so freaking hard not to comment about it all though, when not only the ending but the whole chapter is a mashup of expel cliffhangers. But I think this has to be your best prologue yet. I was on the edge, and hooked. The beauty, the mystery..and the silent dhak dhaks. I dont know how you do it.
7. The whole her going through the various rooms trying to find him "cha kar bhi main tumse duur nahi ja sakti" but kya "Shayad mera dil tumhe pukarta hai" is happening also?
8. The man has broad shoulders! haha.
9. I think you having finally used Sheetal well! Enough trolling around, this seems like legit jealousy inducing business. LOVED IT! I wonder what it would be like if expel went awl "dark"? But thats not you..and I am grateful cause who else will serve me a hot platter of SKD's?
10. The eyes are back too and so is the staring wala looking. I wonder what emotion in "his" eyes can possibly justify this act to her..cause it clearly seems like the lady and the man have something going. "Inn ankhon me nafrat dikhai deti hai, kyun ki mohabbat inme dard ban kar rehti hai?"
11. I knew there was something about the word Shattered.
"Why else did she feel mortally wounded, even when there was no blood?"
"Until it finally lay there, broken into countless pieces."
"Shattered, just like her fragile dreams."
I cannot wait to read how these dreams came to be and how they were shattered.
And mostly "kash main tumse mohabbat kar pata" will be altered or not?
Who are we kidding this is an ArHi Story, I am sure no ramanchi in the prologue the lady = Khushi and the man = arnav.
12. I really enjoy your title-ation, so glad you are bringing it back.
13. Aman Mathur!! I want to be his chuddy buddy and get answers to all the how's and why's of ASR not wanting to work with KKG. He clearly knows a LOT more than most, so wonder if this is a final goodbye or we will be seeing more of him..
14. Your penchant for trying new stuff and always keeping it interesting: politics..minister for health and family welfare..principal secretary! Tumhe aise ideas aate kaha se hai?! LOL and here I was thinking of this AU to be all gatsbyesque, prediction failure dun.
15. Then there is juhi style of bringing AUs so much more closer to the reel life. Sheesh mahal attached to past memories that he wants to forget..
16. Active Risks, urf A.R. Seriously?! Where else can I see all my SKDs being fulfilled but your stories oh and the captain's OS's (captain, aman, nk, varun = dead thud). An Adventure Sport coordinating ASR. M dive into the gutterz with my scuba gear on ya?
17. There is a POOLSIDE somewhere. bas.
18. I like how I can hardly ever kostin your characters choices..like how easily you justify ASR's coming back to help out his only family. Or the way Khushi cannot leave her job. HM.
19. A mature KKG. Dont get me wrong I loved the KKG of scandalous, secrets and sins even..trying to find themselves in life and all. Par this one is different, and I couldn't be happier. (also you do write great khushi's)
20. What would be a Khushi who doesnt get flustered by half hidden meaningz by a certain ASR? Yet there is something different here..I have my guesses but I am not revealing dem ya?
21. The way you re-do those scenes and add meaning to them, the papers flying everywhere. Not just one scene, most of that promo being incorporated in just 1 chapter.
22. oops I forgot. Pale Lilac Sari. Beautiful and elegant.
23. Oh the new style of dishing good old challenges.
24. Their proximity also gives me the love scene 2, dori pulling pheelz..disconcerting and something more cant put a word to.
25. There are two things that stand out. How easily arnav suits a neta type role when we enter the press conference scenario. How Khushi's anger finally comes out near the end, boiling point reached.
26. Its always been the way hasn't it, when K confronts A about something, and he more or less runs away from it. Many a times that has seemed so un-justified and so weak of ASR's character, but I think the whole nafrat thing you are going with gives me the pheelz that for once there is a legit reason he keeps running away, I love how you showed that in the beginning.
27. I love the fiery KKG's you have always given, but this one is even more special, like I said more mature..more worldly. May it be admonishing him for his unprofessional behaviour or sticking up for her beliefs religious or fashion wale.
28. Vulnerability. due to his past...? I have a total soft corner and irrational wala heart pounding for a vulnerable ASR. Cannot wait. Waise even the eye wala looking is quite different here, its not quite rabba-veyish, more practical I think, more real? (ps. although I do love your version of the eye sax to infinity and beyond) Am I making any sense..?
29. THANK YOU! For making him object to "chote" seriously he was way too much of an ASR for that shizzle. And even a grown man like Arnav doesn't deserve that, bas. Unless ofcourse *jumps in the gutter*
30. Ok so there are very Arnav's I like from the beginning, and I do like this one. I like that he did come back for his family when they needed him but at the same time he is selfish/self-made person. The way you handle both his sides is phenomenal and by means not an easy task, I know he might have to take tough decisions in the future pertaining to nani's "mujhe pota-poti de do beta, aur apne liye ek house wife le lo!" haha kidding kidding.
31. Again A.R. makes so much sense, a perfect escape from the stifling atmosphere. You know as much as he suits the neta role, I think this is what he really wants to do..his calling. I dont think he will be able to give it up easily, in the end (today's convo ya?)
32. Sheetal seems nice enough, it is only natural to crush and care about someone as magnetic as ASR who can blame her. She doesn't sound super clingy or chasing him endlessly types, because they do seem to share a great professional relationship?
33. JUJU IS BACK -
She was definitely not an opinionated spitfire who dressed in muted sarees and never accepted her mistakes...
34. I like the subtle way you are describing things in this one..khushi's feelings. There is a 500things going on under the surface, I am not sure if she feels guilty yet, because what was with the questioning look in her eyes in the beginning, but she sure doesnt NAFRAT Arnav, yet.
35. I love that La and NK are already shipped. bas.
36. La and K are midnight calls wale buddies..not the same as 2am calls but yeh bhi chalega. I really do like La's understanding wali advice there are a lot of things on line for K, the new life she has built for her after that 10year old incident. But at the same time K's "We can't keep it from him forever, La. And I feel guilty about asking you to keep secrets from your own husband..." This is something TG once said to me, and it really stuck out! The conversations as usual are well thought out, rational and show all sides of the coin.
37. I really love your take on ASR the businessman to Netaji transition. Nailed It. His coming early to the office, his need to take action rather than just be a name head, his need to succeed in what he was doing..typical.
38. Sheesh mahal has HAPPY memories. oh the irony.
39. I think this was by far my favouritest God related scene in your stories, when Arnav enters K's cabin and finds her praying. That was a genius idea J!! I wonder if along with surnames, and changing names, and political backgrounds...religion will play a part in this. Or is it the same old case of belief vs non belief? Regardless you always do take a fresh perspective on that, I mean you brought in the Indian Constitution and all :P
40. I like this new way of changing feeling dynamics, without any rabba-veys or eye sax, just plain old introspection. It feels like you consciously want me to get something out of this more than a SKD haha. Now A's thoughts about getting adrenaline wali feelings with verbal combats with K makes me doubt my point 6 about him wanting to go back for AR.
41. The politics..are you sure you dont know much? As usual you go your Juju way of doing things..logically, almost see a ff-real life reflection in K and J yaaara! LOL. I cannot freaking way to see how they, if they, manage to bring about some change. This gives me such a kick!
42. From firing to assurance. I think it made complete freaking sense. You always have the tendency to change things up, but not abruptly and not just cause you want to or have to move to the next phase of their relationship.
43. I love the way he described her, what all of us have been saying all along. I think if rabba-vey does happen it will be on the merit of these things. I dont know if one of those happened in the past, because as she said this was the first time he smiled at her..ever! I
44. The nightmare and waking up from it well done, but no comments from me LOL.
45. The title for this one again, and it was so appropriate for the next "phase" of their relationship. Its stupid of me to even be surprised anymore at your perceptiveness. The poetry attached to both, perfect balance between SKD and AD!:
He had entered this place like the rays of sunshine behind him, dispelling the gloom of neglect and apathy that she had been trying to fight for years...
A pale crescent moon had risen in the sky behind her, and he thought about how similar they were.
She was cool, calm and collected, and always brought a serenity with her.
46. Your stressing on Arnav's nightmare, which probably means the past is no piece of cake either. It makes me not want to jump at his throat when he is being unnecessarily mean. I also get the feeling that she doesn't feature in this nightmare, she is an indirect cause of his past..because if she did, it would be hard for him to forget the "hatred".
47. That this ASR smiles. I don't know why thats important, but it just shows your characters are never one dimensional..yes there is the past, but he doesn't stop him from "living". J I think you have come a Long Way (please no gutterz yaara).
48. The intelligent bickering, is a nice twist on their so called baseless verbal lashings. I can understand how the intelligence both have can lead to mutual (secretive) admiration and even attraction..AND finally hatred forgetation! The non-rabba vey route you have taken here and yet made me pheel the pheelz, you do have magic J.
49. Him being the man of her dreamz 5real! Oh who can't relate to Khushi's dilemma "system ko badal ne jao..khud system tumhe badal deta hai" (yes i quote rang de basanti..not the most politically sound movie but still) And so when the chance doth come, as a man with a fresh perspective on politics, influenced by his penchant for business..and surprisingly uninfluenced by his family who would no doubt have some kind of rigid political ideologies..who wouldn't be swept away?!
50. For now, her reason to caution her heart is only because HE hates her and not because she feels responsible/guilty enough for it all
51. For a Fishy Shyam. And hey if KKG says he is fishy, he must be FISHY, no arguments there!
52. Mercurial Mood Swings (MMS). I love the fact that you have justified them heer so well though. I can understand his dilemma, even when I dont know the past.
53. The PHYSICAL ATTRACTION. Thank you. I expected this would happen..but the way it seems to flow from one phase to another..makes complete sense. Juhi this is the most subtle way in which you have reached this stage so far and I am so proud. Although at the same time I also love standing under waterfalls while reading with a tale of dancing on the edge, scandalous..but I like that yet again you are exploring a new way of doing things. Oh also it surprises me that they haven't shared any of these pheelings in the past, which makes me think their relationship (if any) must be limited to friendship..or even khushi somehow being subordinate to Arnav/his family..two reasons for the Sir Jibe?
54. The politics, the medical jargon..J you know your stuff, bas. It makes sense to a lay-woman like me..cause even if you are talking about these revolutionary ideas, you always keep it simple.
55. It never surprises me when KKG fights back in your stories, and the way she lives up to each and every challenge/curveball that ASR throws at her. However it is hard to make her fight back and at the same time make her sound relatable and not superwoman/wonderwoman prototype. You can strangely maintain that balance really well, J.
56. The rain scene was my favourite it reminded me of the the one in the banner..and promo. You managed to show both sides of the story of a man with a past, SO PERFECT & BEATUTIFUL J. FARAQ. I dont know how you do it..but @LetMeLoveYou
Appalled to realize that he was lusting after a woman who was responsible for destroying his past, and tainting his present.
57. An ungreedy ASR.
58. I love the last argument, such a J logical way to put it all.
59. This is the first time I have actually steeled myself to follow your S tales as you write and update them every three days, and its safe to say I am slowly going bald. Still I wouldn't have it any other way!
Shattered gives me the rush ya, just like ASR gets one when verbal hockeying with KKG.
Most of all, I can always trust you (after LLATW) to give me the best "what could have been scenario" if IPK had kept its promises.
I cannot even begin to imagine how HARD it is for someone as logical as you to have such an intense hateful past, and yet make them fall in love...
So when I saw this
this morning I thought of you and Shattered and how much I cannot wait to know what the past is going to be, and what the future holds.
60. San Francisco, because you always do things with a reason, choosing a place is no different. I love the difference that you try to show through ASR's character, the different elements of the city you incorporate throughout the story, makes it that much more real.
61. The A+K trip although you justify it, where Khushi is taking the bait, and arnav is throwing it..you also accept that its not reason enough, there was more at play unconsciously hamesha! That is such a J technique.
62. I am glad that K is not alone in the world, she has a support system out there (lava for now)..no matter how mature, worldly professional she is..I guess thats what makes her real and not superwoman. You did the same with the K+Payal relationship in Scandalous, well but that was a whole different scenario. Now about the past so I still feel Khushi was indirectly responsible for it, but it wasn't a misunderstanding, it was her fault, and this is the first time we are seeing signs of guilt, but as Lava said she clearly can't hold on to that, she has to move on in life..and thats what she has been doing so far. Lava's concern for her really hit home that her family is believes its important for Khushi's self-preservation to pretty much stay away from Arnav, cause all there would be is heartache. Wonder how long, K working for A will be a secret from the family? And why is the family such a secret too?! (so many kostins!)
63. The rabba-vey pheelz are back! Love that you decided to go through the motions first with ASR (we already know prologue is K pheeling it). I dont know how to say this but after the last update, I felt it would be more easy for Khushi to fall for him, almost in sort of he is Tony Stark and she is Pepper kind of way? But now I understand why he would fall for someone like K too! She stumps him with not only her smartness but also stands up and fights back, something ASR is probably not used to. So to me it was important to level the playing field and you did just that with this chapter. (n den confuse J dun)
64. An ASR that realises his shortcomings, even if they are only professional. There are more reasons then 1 to love this man, with a past.
65. The battle between CA vs Delhi, is not just about forgetting the past..it is also about the kind of work he does, he clearly doesn't believe its as revolutionary as K and doesn't get as much kick out of it as he does K. It is also the kostin of where he can be his real self, CA definitely wins...but then isn't he being himself with Khushi..? I dont know why this point struck me probably because you asked where A would end up in the end. I love that you keep it complex..with the million things going on in his head..without having to resort to million twists and turns, keeping it fairly unsoapy, and only natural (sorry had to compare!).
66. The Jealousy. PERFECT J. Perfect. Especially LOL'd at what A could have said! Bichara.
67. A glimpse of just how simple and easy going there relationship has a potential to be, with the casually sharing dinner.
68. There are two favourite parts in this chapter, the first is like I said before the journey of "what kind of pull was this anyway?" with A. That whole part his dilemma was so so so well done J. Totally lived up to my expectations of not only the promo, but also the dialogue I posted in the beginning on the thread.
69. Ah Sheetal, I feel sorry for her, she is well and truly going to have to go through the path of Lava..being used and then heartbreak. Although she did show them the right raasta..you know in my incessant spamming I was going to ask if sheetal is showing the raasta? And she actually is!
70. The one thing I find hard to understand in this story is the eye wala looking..the mystery and half hidden meaningz seem to be all in that! And since I am super bad at eye wala looking..dont quite understand the looks they are flashing each other..the burning questions? the sir jibe? At least I know I ain't over-reading it all. This brings me to how flawless your story telling is, every word here is well thought out..so even when I knit-pick its consistent, which is hard to achieve when there is such an overarching mystery involved.
71. Ah and then the ultimate challenge. How can someone like K really ignore that? Well well written, not even going to try decipher the hidden meanings..like why A is a coward?
72. From Arnav's dilemmas to Khushi's! What a transition and reminds me you have managed to show them both in their comfort zone and out of it, stressing again the polar opposites they are..
73. What follows after A glimmer of admiration?
74. The way you described the whole experience, have you done it before? If so I would be scared for your life..and glad you are safe now and I can 🤗 you. What brilliant writing J! I felt Khushi, I felt the caves..I felt like I was there doing just that..and den adrenaline rush dun. Hence this was my second favourite part..fighting the battle with her mind and heart..challenge borderlining on stupidity..most of all how I could Totally understand why she forgot her raasta!
75. As soon as I knew A +K were in the same place, signed up for the same adventure sport. I was in SKD heaven ya..with full symphony orchestra playing rabba-vey in background! But what I had in mind was something as cliche as them scuba diving together holding hands and looking at pretty fishes, or better yet jumping off a cliff together. So yup tad bit disappointed that didnt happen..but what did happen and when they did meet made it even MORE special! Such a J thing to do.
76. Khushi. Much like Khushi I could only focus on that too.
77. Khushi's breakdown. Arnav's lashing. You know your characters down to the s. Nothing more nothing less.
78. The last two lines strangely felt like I was back reading Tales..you know the one where he drops her from the office, in part 1. Although she doesnt scream Arnav. But you get my pheelz?
79. Intuition vs proof..oh the irony, boy am I glad it didnt require a forced marriage and kidnap track for A to believe it all!
80. I knew it would be Shyam! To be correct in a J cliffhanger, twice now..is just so much FUN :) The thing I like about this story is how plausible-y you have handled the political aspects, I really dont find much need to question it all, perhaps because I know very little. J I think you have maintained a perfect balance between research and telling a story. May it be this, or the spelunking. BTW speaking of..cannot believe you can drag us to caverns of CA adventure sporting one moment and the next we are in the middle of intense political drama, and all without blinking twice! Den Versatile Writer Award Dun.
81. The debate between AR vs a political career is finally out in the open, although I feel it doesn't hold as much weight as it might couple of chapters down? And yet I can't help take it all in like a hawk. One of the most amazing things about this story is that for the first time ever I finally understood what a "passionate" about his profession ASR is like! Thank you J. Also you kind of answered one of things that was bothering me, how does a scion of a political dynasty, not really have an opinion or is uninfluenced by his family when making a decision..I like your justification for Now, I am starting to think there is more to it in the past..was whatever happened influenced by a political catastrophe, or is it my 2am overactive imagination?
82. Trust. What a word. I think this is what cements a relationship doesn't it. I mean its what let KKG allow ASR to open that dori in the farm house SR in the show haha. I am so glad you brought this in..because all it took for him was to work closely with her and really get to know HER to develop that feeling. Also now the prologue scene and K's pheelingz make so much more sense!
83. The phone calls. J, you really do have a things for phones dont you? LOL. The normal way in which you showed the progress of their relationship..the whole first part was them really getting to know each other and opening up, what better way to do it then this!
84. You know just how much I love the photograph scene in the promo, and I was so happy that you decided to use that. Added it to the confusion bit..because how does it make sense for them to have each other's photos..at first I thought maybe you'd use it for the past. Par like the way you did, now the kostin is where is his photo of them?
85. THE ELEVATOR. Too much hyperventilation and nose block dun. Too much dhak dhak and chest infection dun. You write the best eye sax, without trying to even make a big deal out of it..I love how that brought the "physics" back into the playing field. J you have really really managed to create the multidimensional wala lau between them, its not just based on this attraction..there has been SO much more to it! No easy feet with all the hate that was also looming in the background..which again brings me to my whole iss pyaar ko kya naam doon pheelz theory. You have managed to create something so much deeper than the usual kind of lau and at the same time its as even more fragile because there is no name to it.
86. PM, Party, Proposal. Why do disastrous things happen in threes, must ask Ekta Kapoor. I love how you tied in the prologue to the story here. I could feel K's unease..and it was disconcerting. Its funny how lau can make you overcome things..for A isn't even thinking about the past anymore and K who has always feared it is ready to face it for him! I love this story dammit, dont mind my overanalysis...You know weirdly enough this chapter totally follows the show arc, doesnt it..where A does nothing but encourage the pipe dreams that K is building for them..and then in the next moment he goes and breaks them all.
87. PART 2. KYA BOLUN AB. THE WHOLE THING. THE WHOLE EFFING THING WAS BRILLIANT. Its Arnav to ASR. Mohabbat to Nafrat. Present to Past. The transition was so SMOOTH, and you managed to do it in just one part of a chapter. I bow down to thee! I have never got these many IPK pheelz before, not when A goes in mummy's garden instead of turning up for his wedding...not when A cries when he finds out about "shyam and Khushi". I really dont want to overanalyse this bit and ruin it. Also a total devil's advocate (or sheetal's) but I absolutely love the way he dealt with his hate here.
I have found it awfully hard to understand this:
"He might hate her with everything he had, but he had never stopped wanting Khushi."
And yet after this chapter is over, I get that COMPLETELY.
J you have always done a great job trying to explore your characters through the stories may it be LLATW or Tales..but this one of the BEST jobs you have done in exploring what Arnav/ASR has meant to me (yes I have read sins), the man with a facade that we kind of saw, but never got a chance to dig deep into.
88. I am SUPERDUPER tempted to leave a TFS and run, par you know I can't
chaa kar bhi main SHATTERED se duur kyu nahi reh sakti
Shayad Expel ki writing mujhe pukarti hai
And so a painful, teary
Try as I might to write you something, words really do fail me (and yet I wrote you 1000word essay!). Its not just that I am overwhelmed but nothing I say is going to live up to what you have delivered or the way I pheel now (shattered is one way to put it!).
89. Right from the well thought out title to the big mysterious past..you had it all covered from the beginning. That is something I love about your stories..you know where you are and where you are going. I also love how much of a genius you are with all the hints you dropped and how in this interlude finally nothing was mysterious and everything was very eloquently spelt out (even the eye wala looking!). Not over spelt-out might I add..somethings were still left for us to interpret...say the look that nani and anjali exchanged.
90. When you started this story as a way to deliver something the CVs completely forgot about, I didn't expect it to be the new and improved version of IPK, because you had already done a "dream" version through LLATW. Now I get to finally read an "asli duniya" rendition of how I wish IPK could have been, with Shattered. There are so many parallels in the show and this chapter, its ridiculous to list them all but here are a few..the bond that both leads share with their siblings, the pressure of feeling indebted to the family who have done so much for you and most importantly the opposites that are leads!
91. The adoption of kids orphaned during a traumatic communal riot by 2 intrinsically kind souls is one of the many reasons why I loved this interlude.
92. The way you actually created an epic heer-ranjha, a romeo-juliet type star-crossed lovers wali situation..was again so much more real, than just a dramatic play. A courtship that was cursed right from the beginning - age, religion, social standing, par "pyaar bas ho jaata hai"! Anjali's obligation to marry and NK's heartbreak that could cause him to do something drastic, that could happen to anyone let alone two individuals who have seen a LOT in their 20something years of life. I have never quite understood the need for people to kill two people in love, what is it to you?! And again with the communal riots haven't we seen it happening again and again..in different places all across the country. Thank you J! For even thinking about this..let alone writing it the way you did in your sensible J style, and yet I couldn't help the tears.
93. Trust a word that I said cemented relationships citing the permission to pull dori as prime example..is BACK again. To me its been so important to establish both Mohabbat as we saw the last 6 times, and now Nafrat! That phone conversation they did have (SO PERFECTLY WRITTEN J!), and the one never did..I dont know how to explain this..I didn't know how in the world you could make A hate K. Like really really really Nafrat K. But you did..so simply. GENIUS. GENIUS. GENIUS.
94. The tragedy was everyone's fault and then again no one's at all..I absolute-freaking-love you so so much for this. In just 1 chapter...5000ish words..you established every single character's point of view and made it sound rational, no one is the baddie! That is pure Juhiness and a reason why I like to come here broaden my perspectives and get so freaking attached to each and every character that I am left singing kyu dard hai itna, AWL the time! Also whats more we never really know who killed her, hindus/muslims..unbiased 3rd party rehna koi tumse seekhe bas! (Come to me if you ever want to quit being a D, M haf a list of things u can do instead!).
95. Finally to Arnav and Khushi.
I really do like the Arnav and Khushi you have written here..it explains why he is the way he is even in the past. With his need to move away from everything politics, thanks to his parents failed marriage. And yet I appreciate his kindness and politeness..he didn't just see khushi and throw her out. I understand his lack of faith. J your A's have always been a bit impulsive, doing without thinking like the show..but this ones a bit different. He always is never one to interfere, and accepts and supports his loved one, trusting them enough to be able to make their own decisions.
Whereas K is the opposite isn't she? She is the impulsive one, the one who as always can't see a tear in anyone's eyes..and interferes thinking it will make them happy. She is still young and innocent. I like her staunch faith in religion even after everything that had happened with losing her parents to now losing Anjali, maybe a way to deal with it. It is very very important to be unbiased and yet explain both sides well when writing 2 diametrically opposite characters, who have been dished out almost the same situation...sibling ke liye pyaar, bhayanak past and orphan-ed status etc. Maybe because of your sensible ways you write them SO WELL, and capture their essence..like no one else. (Speaking of.. I am totally a biased party..seeing as whatever knowledge/pheelz I have for the IPK characters stem from the way you have written them..and very little from the TV show!)
96. The nightmare scene, the chaos and the whirlwind that takes place in Sheesh Mahal on the day of the wedding..I cant even J. Just take a bow, and keep doing that 500times.
97. And then every single scene that follows, that tells us how they all dealt with it are dealing with it. Short, succinct and hits right home. I know everything is going to be just OK between them..but I cant not tear up at the A's anguish and K's guilt. Now I finally let myself come to the present. And its like I suddenly hold the password to dickode the last 6 chapters..and EVERYTHING falls into place.
98. I cant help feel proud of K, for where she is at now..for her struggles, and the way she has been masking her guilt. I feel like I am at Sins all over again..just in reverse. To forgive oneself is even harder than to be forgiven. Where will this take them now? 10 years ago feels like a different time all together..a different Arnav and Khushi! Will the glimpses of their past be more pronounced now in the present?
[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DR0S-ocAmvo[/YOUTUBE]
99. As always I loved the way you continued this from ateet to kash main tumse...
The way you really put the NAFRAT into context of Now.
100. This chapter was one of the most well-written..the dialogues but also the read between the lines. BEAUTIFUL. K's reason for going through hindu ritual's is one of the MANY reasons, why I am saying that. J..you are beautiful and a genius, the way you solve problems with the heart and mind in place.
101. I like that your writing touches so many people, intentionally/unintentionally..that sometimes it becomes bigger than just being a story, about two fictional characters who have long left our TV screen. The quality and quantity of arguments, thoughts and substance in shattered mixed with the pheelz and emotions..is so relatable and relevant. As a writer to be sensible and sensitive is your biggest strength.
102. I like the way this isn't just character development or growth for arnav and khushi. I like that Sheetal got something out of it too. Like the fact that she was blinded by the persona of "ASR" she felt dhak dhaks for him. But I love how you brought a change in her after this incident..There is something so so endearing about characters who aren't intrinsically evil, but may have lost their way, or have flaws that they work on. Same with say NK, we haven't really heard from him much..but whatever we have..I like that he has someone he got a chance to rebuilt his life with! His guilt and hurt is imperceptible by me..and especially to forgive Khushi his own sister, and to protect her the way he is.
103. I think I have said this before but I love the K here for her being a role model, but not to an extent where she becomes unrealistic. I like that you showed her flaws, and yet made her to be the strong woman she is now! This is what it means learning from your mistakes right? Its funny how I can feel so much sadness for her, even after knowing she might have been the prime reason for Anjali's demise. How do you write such characters?! HOW.
104. What do I even say about the Kaash main tumse moments...they hit the home run.
105. The different things A pheelz for K! J #let me love u
106. The whole first scene between A+P, the way he has to get the information out of her..the STAR WARS type force that motivated him to make that decision. Wonderful way to set the scene, a nice lead up to the final explanation..this is exactly why I was so so so "cliffhanging" when you hadn't posted part 2.
107. K being upset with her own self at refusing the proposal. It reminds me of the opposite time in scandalous when K did accept shyam's proposal! (I am weird.)
108. Lava is a total phanki in disguise, helping K sort out her emotions systematically..Even if they haven't shared much physical space in the story together, the phone conversations were enough to show the kind of bond they shared.
109. How much this reminds me of IPK! The way K would have felt after Diwali, when a hope she didnt know she harboured would have shattered. (I am weirder.)
110. The title.
"Why do I want to run away, and run towards him , all at once?"
"He should be pushing her away... far, far, away...instead, he was searching for reasons to pull her close."
111. The way Lava explains to K it wasn't her fault. The way Nani explains to A it wasn't her fault. The path of slowly reducing the guilt, the anguish within them...but approached in such different ways! This is what it means to really speak through your characters as TG would say..I bow to thee.
112. I second S in wanting to know Lava + NK's past, present and future tense...it is a Juhi style OS waiting to be written!!! (and read!)
113. K did NOT say no because of moral obligation to family or to exact revenge!!! I thought I'd never ever ever see this day. This was one of my favouritest bits (pliss not to misunderwear when I repeat this sentence again) of the chapter. The way you showed why K really would want to get married..by reminding us of that "glimpse" of K in Sheesh mahal, the one hoping, trusting, believing! And the way you filled in the gap when K suddenly made the "decision" in the rain that day outside Sheesh Mahal. This only affirms my faith that nothing in your story is written inconsequentially, everything comes back, ties itself to the plot.
114. The clothes, the physical appearance is all you have to describe for the sexual pheelz to rabba vey in the air. Aise kyu hota hai? (I am weirdest!)
115. The moment you described he pulled her in the room I went Hallelujah!! And as always I be wrong..and I realised what you were trying to do with this story. Usually (mostly!) the next step that cements the lau is dat first kiss, the touch and when they realise they have such combustible chemistry...they are like EFF IT ALL! But heer I lau that even though the sexual pheelz are important, the mohabbat is much more than that! The need the want to be together isn't limited to that. Kya bolun ab?
116. The Faraq Kostin was asked.
117. Million and 1 things he could have done to exact revenge, if he truly HATED her.
118. The past. The way he began discussing it, something that he couldnt even talk to his own Nani about! The way she replied, and the acceptance of a mistake and then an apology. We have come a full circle.
119. The honesty is such a refreshing change. I really do hope K can be that if she says no to his final kostin. Although in her case there is so much more at stake, and I can understand her need to deny and self-preserve instead of admit the truth. Because he is the one who has the mood swings dominated by the hate, and she will have to bare the brunt of it.
120. The reason for making out with Sheetal. I DIDNT SEE THAT COMING! HoliTellyTubbyLand. That is such an ASR from diwali flashback!! The last effort to fight the "dor" between them.
121. The way he reads into her, just by 1 single object..the self imposed punishment. Even us clue-finding phankis couldn't before you mentioned it in the interlude! And like S said he is always so perceptive when it comes to her, they are so attuned to each other..
122. The hate. You have really really really dwelled deep into that, without making it all dark and emo. Usually people really dwell deep into the love, and the hate only appears on the surface. I think you just explained to me how Nafrat and Mohabbat can exist between two people. J I dont even know how to articulate this point so I am going to leave you to telepathically understand me.
123. LASTLY. past vs future. hatred vs the force. The way you beautifully described that the force between them is beyond all the hatred by the Sheetal scene Or in case of Khushi even when she keeps seeing the constant hate in his eyes. How can you start a future with a person who is the strongest reminder of your hateful past? Well K+NK are still going strong..even if that relationship is different. So maybe just maybe there is a chance..Will the Force be strong enough to overcome all this? It clearly was did the spelunking chapters etc.
124. I like that you brought in other issues, apart from the whole past..I hadn't even thought about that much like A. Reminds me of 10 years ago and the similar predicament that Anjali and NK found themselves in.
125. The beautiful balance between wanting them to give it a go vs wanting them to part ways. Need I say more? You really should have written IPK dammit!
126. I love that Arnav is the one to fall in this first, almost thoughtlessly...but the beautiful thing is its not just that he wants her in the sexual pheelz way, because than we wouldn't be seeing him consciously and genuinely making subtle changes..oh how beautifully you described his conflict..NK vs K. The love does win..and it makes me hopeful. Although I am worried that he is just pushing this in the recess of his mind, rather than having dealt with it..would it come blow up later? Then there is him letting her pray, even if he is a bit uncomfortable..Then the finale with the trust, tum theek ho..And I am pretty sure he has ended up at her door in the end.
127. I love that you brought back together to the worst possible nightmarish place, and kept the nafrat real..but also the subtle care and love was palpable. Things have changed..and I think K is too afraid (understandably so) to give it another go, looking away because she thought she would see hatred.
128. TRUST. My favourite word..is heer. But as always I cannot for the life of me articulate. And also I just got this weird flashback for a second..its almost like the current A has become like K 10 years ago hopeful without a caution wanting to see this through and K on the other hand has become more guarded just like A was 10 years ago. I am freaking weird, and I blame you your story is taking over my life dammit.
129. K has a LOT on her plate, first her parents in communal riots and than the guilt over anjali. And now she is in yeh ishq hai with arnav..so really there isn't going to be any easy way to move on in life without him. Cant be with him and cant be without him. J, you made me cry again..just thinking about her situation. As always your K's are stubborn to jumping into the no-name relationships that A proposes..although the situation is a supremely complicated heer, I feel not much has changed. Because once K gives in, she is all in..there is no backing out no matter the hurt the pain. The scene in her apartment beautiful.
130. A full circle from K to A! - "What if I wasn't your boss? What if...we had never met before? What if there was no past between us?"
131. One way I see out of this if A accepts that the past isn't just HER fault! Anyhow wonder what he is upto now...leaving us on cliffs since 5eva, but dont worry I will keep calm and not predict!
132. This has to be my favouritest story dealing with A+K, it has kind of given me a closure that I didnt even know I wanted. I trusted you to do a good job, but didn't expect you to go as far as you did. You 5real kept all the promises..justified and answered all the kostins I have ever had about A+K being the way they were.
I guess what I am trying to say is you not only fulfilled "iss pyaar ko kya naam doon" criteria but went beyond it...I mean have you read chapter 10?!
133. The pace, is perhaps one of the most important things when dealing with a multitude of emotions. I have never once felt that this story was rushed, that the emotions and characters moved too fast, even if it is a SS. There were no so called fillers, I mean any sane writer would have let them be after chapter 9, and solved this dilemma first in their heads..instead of another confrontation. But you being you dealt with straightaway and convinced us, instead of letting us dwell in the abject misery of the situation..cause you knew something we didnt...what they shared was beyond all this hate, past and lau. So first off a big 👏 (non-sarcastic) for the pace of the story telling.
134. Keeping it real, it is so so easy to get carried away in grand melodramatic gestures when time comes for the real confrontation. But you kept it so natural, so simple..I have always loved the way your A+K understand and each other by reading eyes and expressions (makes me have more faith in eye wala looking, even though M perpetually myopic mixed with not ready to share my personal space!). I loved that all A needed was to see that look in her eye to understand, that he cant keep using his flirting tactics and the cat needed to be out of the bag! So he did bring it out..and she helped, and together they weaved through the past, but I as third party never forgetting just how hard it must be for BOTH of them (thanks to your flawless, unbiased writing!). I loved that you showed just why K was so so attached to NK and so desperate to do what she did 10 years ago. I love that the situation is more or less like sins again, however it wasn't completely her fault..and we can all see that, I am sure poojali could too if she was around...toh A kya cheez hai? Obviously things would shatter around him no? So it hit me, if they can speak like this about the past, what they share is much more real and potent and worthy to be given a chance..than walking away from. And whats more they both maintained their distance the physics only coming to play in the end, and that too so so beautifully. J all of this would be next to impossible if you hadn't kept this realistic, and wrote it the way you did with the beautiful J type logic and realisations! So second time 👏 (non-sarcastic) and I guess its part of the reason why I am so attached and spend way too many hours than necessary thinking about them!!
135. But what I liked the most about this chapter is that phone call. Even though they have buried the hatchet and kind of moved on and established whatever they have is worth a shot..they didnt JUMP ahead of themselves. I love the way you have paced their relationship. So when the kiss did come, it felt well deserved..and an action of deep lau rather than the reason for lau itself (yup time for looney theories, warned you about my overthinking ways!).
136. Then NK thanked K for not making the same mistakes as him. CAN I LOVE YOU ANYMORE J? CAN I? But wait him and ASR coming face to face..that sounds like a brutal blow..I hope K can be there for him through his nightmare..just the way he was for her.
137. The eye wala looking, was just faraqing faraqing amazing in this chapter..the best you have done so far..M haf partial amnesia whaat jaadu hai nasha hai? The way they talk with their eyes, the gift, the wearing the not wearing. Obviously there is a J type cliffhanger in that too! But patience is a virtue, didnt I learn after reading 6 chapters of this story!
138. Time for the REAL mystery though...who is this Pratap Singh? The man who kicked little Di and his chotte out of the sheesh mahal in the show? Are you going to close this loop too? Or are him and Nani involved, cause a birdy did tell me!
139. ALSO the last line. the last effing line. kya bolun ab? "mat jao" redun?
140. Oh before I forget. This ASR has really blown me over J. Usually K is the hero of your stories..but this man. I'd like him IN a nice hair cut! TFS. Also personal apologies to him, for not having enough faith in him! Pliss dont misunderwear ASR yaara, uss waqt halaat hi aise the..
141. At the same time though a commendable job on K. Her strength to move on with someone who is the key to her guilt..but now also her happiness. She made me cry..she is so real, beautiful and intrinsically K.
142. Lastly, it never fails to strike me just how well you created a substantial nafrat wala past without making your characters psychotic or the story itself dark. They did have their looney ways and mind sets of dealing with it...but nothing bat shit creeezy. That in itself makes it easy to fathom the love they can come to share. TFS dammit. TFS.
143. J the pheelz. The sexual pheelz. They seems so different heer, everything is magnified in this one, because love came first and well "want" was always running parallel but its finally in the foreground. Oh the things a post-rain scene can bring out..what I loved the most were the conversations in the middle of all this sexual tension!
144. A is mindful that this is a first date and that he is sticking to his every word..of taking things slow. That is a big change, from the ASRs who are always controlled by their "want" alone, and ready to jump K.
145. They might actually get to find out more about each other by dating (in a SKD beyond this SKD..because you are freaking ending this soon..KDHI!).
146. The way K brings up "past relationships" and just how committed A is to whatever is happening between them.
147. When A says "everything", again..this is really a different A, from the one we are used to. But the one that makes sense nonetheless. Likeable, even if he was controlled by a traumatic past.
148. What do I even say about the kangans. What a thoughtful, generous (in sentiment) and epic gesture! Its such a big deal for him, bigger than opening up the pandora's box (pun intended) of 10years ago..I keep getting this feeling that they are star-crossed lovers, and when they do see this through they would be one of the few successful ones, not succumbed by ill-fate. And dan dey be my favourite :') And whats more the A who can't bear K's tears is back! Oh and also I should have guessed they were kangans what with all the hand fiddles going on since chapter 1!!!
149. I knew you wouldn't just get them in an apartment almost shirtless and wet haired, if NK wasn't going to come in..cause its too soon for the butterflies to plateau. Again the way A+K read each other, holy shit. Wish there were more of those around..everywhere around me is all mars and venus!! I love that NK jumped to that conclusion..and I love that A does stand up for them, without K having to jump in...but the kostins, I have been waiting for them to pop-up, and I love the way you made A leave, even if it might seem kind of cowardly...they have only just started dealing with things, and all the "so-called" issues keep piling up! That man needs a breather..
150. WOW Akash is not the sweet mellow guy here! And what that means is that Payal has a chance to be feisty right back! LOVE. IT.
151. I effing love Nani heer. Especially the first paragraph, just cracked me up! ROFL. It takes a lot of integrity to own up to ones mistakes, mend ways and change perceptions especially at Nani's age. I love you for making me never jump to conclusions about any characters..making me love them all even with the flaws. Oh and can I phangirl over how much I loved A's last line to nani..love that it doesnt feel weird when he says it! YOU ARE BRIL. J!
152. Kissing nahi toh fiddles sahi! One thing I have learnt from this story is hands are important..bas. But seriously I do like how K is ever da vigilant, there is a lot more shit ready to hit the phan if people get an inkling of things between them. So one step at a time.
153. How the conversation went..everything and more I wanted to hear and again it was beautifully written. I can understand A's anger at K for losing hope, for running away at the first sign of distress. But I can also understand K's apprehensions, this is a person who has punished herself all her life..and now when life is punishing her..she probably thinks she deserves it.
154. I pheel NKs pheelz more DAN I should...thanks to your epic writing dammit, KDHI..."Why was this happening to her, of all people?"
155. I love A heer, just quietly. I love that he is mature rational even whilst being in love..
156. The phone calls are back LOL!! Although nothing like we have seen in the past..but something is better than nothing. A in his office reminds me of long ago..when he was missing her? Or thinking about her..and I almost thought that because K gives him the same thrills he would settle for being a minister. I dont think I see that happening now..not because of his ambition, but because that would entail them being in the public eye, he would still be her boss and 101problems they would take up.
157. And so K lets herself be punished..it makes me sad angry and teary all at once, much like Garima. That was a freaking freaking brilliant scene! With all the other high voltage drama I had forgotten about how Garima would feel about K living the way she has for all these past years! A mother..would hate to see her child suffer, let alone if the suffering was self-induced! Thank you for bringing her in!
158. A+K are funny. Talk about everything but the issues. dont say I miss you and let the person how much you hurt, until you have found a solution of your issues.
This is for J, who reads this and 4 threads worth of comments like these.. 👏 (non-sarcastic)! I wouldn't put half as much effort in, if you didnt come back to my scrapbook and make jokes about my looneyness, or laugh at all the fiddles..or ask me to sexplain da half hidden meaningz. Your story is only half as wonderful as you are...
luna
ps. dont know if I need 2 posts for this shizzle, dammit.
pps. YAY it worked!
ps. to you-know-who. Pliss dont misunderwear dis for da updex!!!
Edited by LooneyLuna - 12 years ago
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