SS: Its All Along YOU!!! Chapter 2- PG 6! - Page 4

"...unrequited love does not die; it's only beaten down to a secret place where it hides, curled and wounded. For some unfortunates, it turns bitter and mean, and those who come after pay the price for the hurt done by the one who came before."

"Because, if you could love someone, and keep loving them, without being loved back . . . then that love had to be real. It hurt too much to be anything else."

"One thing you can't hide - is when you're crippled inside."

So by now you got a short glimpse about what am saying.

Love- isn't this four letter word does magic in our Lives? For many its wonderful ,amazing feeling. Well it is when your love is reciprocated. You will feel top of the world. You feel like you have achieved everything,and there is nothing left behind. When some one near you falls in love , you feel happy for them. I want to experience same emotion, want to embrace the warmth too. But I'm not that fortunate to experience it.

In this world each of us have their own definitions for Love. But in actual how many are cherishing it? How many are feeling blessed to be loved? Strange world.

Some love money, some possessions, animals, materialistic things etc etc. but loving somebody truly gives you a pleasure,immense happiness which cannot be described in mere few words. If used then it is not worth!

There are various kinds of love. Before I give more info about love and its categories, I want to share my past with you. There is nothing much to say,except what I have lost and what am going to in future.

I was a blessed child. Dada and maa are the first lovers to me. They showered their unconditional love on me. I was a small kid so I didn't understand it much back then. I only know one thing and that was...they are MINE. They buy toys for me,fed me,played with me, made me sleep on their shoulders, sang lullabies,soothed me when I got hurt. They always smile when I smile, cry with me when I do. They do everything for my happiness. Parents never expect anything from their children. One will realize the fact only when one gets matured enough to understand what it is to be parent. If you have any opportunity to show how much you love your parents, do it immediately. No one knows what future holds for us!

I turned and took a glance towards love of my life who is lying on bed.

A short pang of pain shot through me. I took her hand in me " Please open your eyes jaan, just once. I will not leave you this time. Do you hear me "Ammulu" ? I am here. Please respond once. im dying jaan,please come back for your …."

She opened her eyes slowly. I was waiting for this moment with bated breathe. Finally it happened. Ecstatic joy filled me!

"Ammulu you okay? How are you feeling? Is it hurting still?" I bombarded her with my non stop questions. But she just stared at me.

She was staring at me as if she had seen me for the first time. She was confused, perplexed with the turn of events. I can just look at her eyes for rest of my life. But right now she is my priority. Confusion is etched on her face.

I called out for doctors .

All the time I was looking at her, my love,my life. Tears welled up in my eyes.

I want to get lost in those eyes,freeze the time and let her be in my arms. I wont let anyone snatch her from me again!

I will lock her in my embrace and never let any pain touch her.

Doctors came and checked those devices and metres. She was breathing normally. It was a miracle. I don't know what good deed I have done ,for once my wish is fulfilled. I was shouting on poor doctors who are equally surprised like me and taking all kinds of cautions.

I was calling out for her. "Jaan , look at me, it's me. Nothing will happen now. I will take care of everything. Just be with me ammulu….your…" as the words were out ,she closed her eyes.

Panic struck me. Is she going to leave me again? Leaving me in this dark world? How could I cope up now? No. I wont let her win this time. Enough! Now it's my turn.

Doc injected something and she very soon went into her dreamland. Her residence, from past few YEARS.

She won again. And I lost her again. She loved to win everytime. Each and every stage of life she won but only once she lost and from there I lost her forever. Is it a crime if nothing is expected in return? then why God ,why you've chosen me? I have never complained to you about anything anytime. Then why are you punishing me? Take my life ,not hers. It kills me with in to see her like this. Is this suffering not enough? What do you want to prove? This world is yours and you have built it. Why are you destroying my world? Don't do this. Please. Don't break me.

I don't know for how much time , I was crying holding her hand. No, I need to be strong not for myself,but for my love. Ammulu didn't like cowards.

Responsibilities, how I wish there would be some one who can take my burden. If duties are properly executed then you get praises,if not guilt will be additional bonus!

Life is simple if you do not expect anything ,but it's bland.

I got up from chair holding her hand. Threaded my fingers in her hair…and i said " I cannot stay in this world alone anymore ,because of you... all I want,is you all I need is you" I spoke in her ears and left the room.

I came out and looked at her through mirror. Doc insisted she needs rest and they are still in the room discussing.

There is a weird pleasure in loving someone who doesn't love You! Loving you is making me vulnerable, but if I do not love you it's miserable.

The corridor was silent as usual. Not many people will come around at this hour. The same corridor is looking different today, May be this is the last time i get to visit this place. The thought itself made my heart skip a beat. How on earth I could think like this? I sat on a couch and closed my eyes.

Memories haunt you,whether they're good or bad. They make you cry. One mistake and here I am. Going down the memory lane…I recollect one such moment where I felt like a jerk!

"How do you feel when your most precious thing is lost? How do you feel when your soul is about to depart from this world. Do you know that theory 1 ball 7 runs? Atleast there is a chance of no ball and can hope for it.

But how do you feel when there is no hope and its next to impossible to achieve it? When each and every door is closed and its keys are lost? Frustration, helplessness, pain, anguish everything I was suffering ".

Hi! I'm Jai and this is my story.

Please ,please leave ur comments😳...and yeshhh while writing this part..all i can hear is this voice and the anguish ..and pain in those lyrics.