Arhi OS... 'INCOMPLETE'

Incomplete

The smoke, the noise, the music… they were never her cup of tea. Yet she was here, looking at her surroundings with a slight frown caressed her face between her eyes, joining her thin brows. Hair tied in a high ponytail that swung on her right with comfortably loose kurti that revealed her curves in sensual manner, her eyes took in the commotion in front of her. She moved aside, disgust, when she felt men tripping over their steps in their drunken state. In the dark with flashing neon lights, the frown was deep and clear, the eyes molten brown, and the skin flawless – she was an epitome of beauty. Not giving a glance to people who were eyeing her, she walked over them all, quickly, to reach her friends who were weaving their hands at her.

His eyes followed her throughout the way, never leaving her. His eyes had been following her from past three and a half years, when she had walked through the door of their lecture hall on the first day of their university. She was his first friend he had made in there. She was his best friend later. She was the love of his life now. She had become his everything. As she joined her friends at a corner of the pub, he watched them pulling her into bear hug; she struggled to keep up with them while breathing. She laughed, her head throwing back as her hair fell back from her shoulder, revealing its length, just reaching her waistline. The speakers buzzed into the music familiar to him. The band, oddly, had a great importance in his love life. He was into soft music without lyrics, violin piece mostly, but he had been introduced to this band through her.

Empty spaces
fill me up with holes

Distant faces
with no place left to go

Without you within me
I can't find no rest

Where I'm going
is anybody's guess

A chuckle escaped his lips as the music hit him hard, bringing his numb mind alive once again. And he watched her eyes searching around her, for him. That simple gesture, to see him, skipped his heart, making him vulnerable, throwing all his resolutions out of the window of his heart and mind. And he fell in love with her, all over again. Her eyes met his, across the pub, just as the space between them filled with lyrics of their now-favorite band. Crowd, their shouts and roars, applause, or their dance, the noise, tinkling of glasses or ice pieces in it – everything faded away, in a rage speed, leaving her and him and their love.

I tried
To go on like I never knew you

I'm awake
but my world is half asleep

I pray
for this heart to be unbroken

But without you all I'm going to be is

Incomplete

His heart was singing it for her, and it reached to her heart. They held their gaze, looking into each other's eyes. He knew he needed to break the gaze. Being with her was a torture and now, when all he wanted to be in peace, he was with her, again. He shouldn't have come to the pub when he knew she would be. This was her party her friends asked for, her celebration for the wedding. Her wedding. He shut his eyes, and emptied the wine in his glass in a large gulp. He could feel her eyes on him, tears filled eyes on him. He wanted to wipe off his agony and make her smile, tell her that she would have a wonderful life ahead. But he was unable too. It was his own mistake that he lost her. He never intended to, but he lost her. Forever. She was someone else's. That thought killed him each passing second.

Someone pulled him towards the dance floor. He saw his friends – their friends – circled her, urging her to dance with them. He chuckled again, avoiding looking at her, as men asking for one last chance to dance with her. Everyone liked her. No. Everyone loved her. She was friendly, kind hearted and understandable. She was fun loving. She like to live her life at the moment and never bothered about her future. She was a girl-next-door. And she liked him, of all the people. She loved him as much he loved her. Even more. And his mistake, his cowardice resulted their separation. Pushing everything aside, he stepped towards her, pulled her by her waist. That was the only moment he would have with her. even if it were for few minutes, he would take those moments. Her hands fell on his chest, her right palm just on his heart, as her eyes locked his.

Voices tell me
I should carry on

But I am swimming
in an ocean all alone

Baby, my baby
it's written on your face

You still wonder
if we made a big mistake

A teardrop escaped from her eye and she didn't try to hide it as she always did. She showed her weakness to him. She showed her pain. He felt a slap on his heart to watch her in pain, inflicted by him. It was his actions that made her leave him. She had called before the night of her engagement, asked him, begged him to stop that. It was him who decided that she would be better off him in her life. And he did the same. Left her for her own happiness. The groom loved her with his heart and she would be happy with her fiance. He had nothing to offer except his soul to her, and he did the same. Now, he was a broken man, gazing in the eyes of the girl he loved, the girl who loved him, with nothing but agony.

"Are you fine?"

Her voice reached his ears, and he chuckled, again, nodding at her. He swung around with her, still chuckling. "My best friend is getting married," he whispered, his voice barely audible but he managed not to chock, "of course I am happy, Khushi."

She didn't buy his words. She knew him more than he knew himself. He could feel his body tense as he guessed what her words would be. Soon enough, he had heard her speak again, "your ex-girlfriend, or may I say, the girl you still are in love with, is getting married. Of course, you have the right to be happy. Right, Arnav."

He stopped at a corner of the floor, looked back over his shoulder to find their friends lost in the music and dance. He pinned her to the wall, his hands on her sides on the wall, trapping her. He managed as much distance between them as he could. "Are you willing to break your marriage and come to me if I say that I love you? Now? No, right. This is not going to happen, Khushi. Neither of our families is willing to give us a chance and we tried our best to make them see sense. Now, it is too late. He loves you."

"What about you?" she questioned him, her voice devoid with emotions. It was plain and clear, she was tired of her own emotions. "What about your love?"

He stepped back, took her wrist, walked up to their friends, and left her between them. Her single question made its worst in him. She questioned about his love but never said about her love. He could feel her love for him in her eyes. But he wanted to hear it from her. She had been trying hard to forget him and think about her fiance. She had put up a great show to make everyone around her believe that she was happy with the wedding. Only he knew what she was going through. And he had nothing to remove her pain. He had to answer her. He walked up to the local band who had been singing the song. Though the band didn't reach to the original, they did justice in their own way. He found himself positioning in front of the microphone, his right hand held the stand, and his sang his heart for her, his feelings and answers to her question… his eyes locked with hers.

"I tried
To go on like I never knew you

I'm awake
but my world is half asleep

I pray
for this heart to be unbroken

But without you all I'm going to be is

Incomplete"