**Writer [Reader] To Writer!**PG 76 - Page 36

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kautilya04 thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
@molten lava

I'm not a literature person myself :( but just thought of two options...mainly coz I'm trying to avoid some office work! Lol

Hmm...If you want the 'mould' aspect, maybe you could write 'two sculpted halves of a single, exquisite mould created by God/at the beginning of time'.

Or if you wanted something more dramatic, like I always do 😆, you could write 'like two opposing forces of darkness and light that collide only to discover that they are two elemental halves of a whole'

Yeah, I'm quite the drama lover 😆 😆
KaaliBilli thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago

Originally posted by: molten_lava

I need help. This is my first time asking for help.

The thing is I don't really know how to frame my question exactly. But I'll try :)

So I'm writing a scene where in my FF, Arnav pulls Khushi roughly against him to kiss her and I'm having trouble with the description part.

Here's what I have written.

His hands had glided up her back of their own accord, pulling her roughly against him, moulding his body completely with hers, every contour fitting perfectly, as if they were the alpha and the omega of the moulds that God created them with.

The alpha and the omega part were just filled in for time pass.😆 Now I want to know what are the exact words I can use there. I tried Google chacha, but when I don't know how to frame the question, and thus it was of no help to me.😆 Now I need the literature brains' help here :) What do you call the sides of a mould? Mould and anti mould?😆 I just need two words to fit in place of alpha and omega.

Alpha and omega means first and last and it may not be appropriate in this situation. Zenith and Nadir means topmost and bottom most. So I need couple words for this sentence, to describe Arnav and Khushi as opposites but yet fitting perfectly against each other.

Help me girls. I'm no literature student. So my brain has kind of stopped working right now and I love that sentence a lot to delete it from my final draft.😆



Hey..

I remember using the words: 'Cope' and 'Drag' in foundry lab. They are still used in sand casting. They are technically the top and bottom part of the sand mold- essentially the same thing you are looking for.

I believe you aren't looking for opposite like extreme [dark-light, matter-anti matter] but looking for symmetry which when put together would be whole. Something complementary, yeah?

And if you are looking for dramatization, then you can replace alpha-omega with sun-moon, soul-mind etc. But with this you might have to rephrase the sentence a bit.

Example:

His hands had glided up her back of their own accord, pulling her roughly against him, molding his body completely with hers, every contour fitting perfectly, - As if they were the last two pieces of Jigsaw puzzle of the life which God created for them.

Hope this helps.

RockBarbie
Fiza28 thumbnail
17th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 12 years ago

Originally posted by: Fiza28

need a hot n spicy scene for a date hehe ideas plzzz


n ff concept gil playing boy for revenge for what his bro did to her sis n boy playing girl for bet hehe but they both r attracted to one another

so hot n spicy scenes mature scenes not too mature but mature😳 ideas thanks

plzzz some help me 😕
Edited by Fiza28 - 12 years ago
molten_lava thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 6
Posted: 12 years ago

Originally posted by: KaaliBilli



Hey..

I remember using the words: 'Cope' and 'Drag' in foundry lab. They are still used in sand casting. They are technically the top and bottom part of the sand mold- essentially the same thing you are looking for.

I believe you aren't looking for opposite like extreme [dark-light, matter-anti matter] but looking for symmetry which when put together would be whole. Something complementary, yeah?

And if you are looking for dramatization, then you can replace alpha-omega with sun-moon, soul-mind etc. But with this you might have to rephrase the sentence a bit.

Example:

His hands had glided up her back of their own accord, pulling her roughly against him, molding his body completely with hers, every contour fitting perfectly, - As if they were the last two pieces of Jigsaw puzzle of the life which God created for them.

Hope this helps.

RockBarbie


Oh dear! Thank you so much. Yes, the cope and drag were the words I was looking for. I was so confused, I didn't even know whether such words existed.😆 Imagine me, staring at google and not knowing what to type.😆

The problem with jigsaw puzzle is that it is commonly used. I've read it in many FFs. So I wanted something different. Sun and moon, soul and mind again is something very common. I wanted to dramatise the entire sentence, because the imagery following before and after the sentence is also quite dramatic and visual.

Once again, thanks a lot.🤗
molten_lava thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 6
Posted: 12 years ago

Originally posted by: kautilya04

@molten lava

I'm not a literature person myself :( but just thought of two options...mainly coz I'm trying to avoid some office work! Lol

Hmm...If you want the 'mould' aspect, maybe you could write 'two sculpted halves of a single, exquisite mould created by God/at the beginning of time'.

Or if you wanted something more dramatic, like I always do 😆, you could write 'like two opposing forces of darkness and light that collide only to discover that they are two elemental halves of a whole'

Yeah, I'm quite the drama lover 😆 😆


@bold: Now that is quite dramatic. I instantly imagined Arnav and Khushi with some supernatural powers and featuring in Avengers or Xmen.😆
But it is beautiful.
reflorated thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 12 years ago

Originally posted by: molten_lava

I need help. This is my first time asking for help.

The thing is I don't really know how to frame my question exactly. But I'll try :)

So I'm writing a scene where in my FF, Arnav pulls Khushi roughly against him to kiss her and I'm having trouble with the description part.

Here's what I have written.

His hands had glided up her back of their own accord, pulling her roughly against him, moulding his body completely with hers, every contour fitting perfectly, as if they were the alpha and the omega of the moulds that God created them with.


The alpha and the omega part were just filled in for time pass.😆 Now I want to know what are the exact words I can use there. I tried Google chacha, but when I don't know how to frame the question, and thus it was of no help to me.😆 Now I need the literature brains' help here :) What do you call the sides of a mould? Mould and anti mould?😆 I just need two words to fit in place of alpha and omega.

Alpha and omega means first and last and it may not be appropriate in this situation. Zenith and Nadir means topmost and bottom most. So I need couple words for this sentence, to describe Arnav and Khushi as opposites but yet fitting perfectly against each other.

Help me girls. I'm no literature student. So my brain has kind of stopped working right now and I love that sentence a lot to delete it from my final draft.😆

You can use -
1)jigsaw puzzles
2)Music (Though I think you may have to rephrase that sentence - "they moulded together like soprano and bass, their tongues dancing to the music they created" This is just a vague example though)
3)Eve and her apple
4)Persephone and Hades
5)Sun and Moon
6)Lion and lioness
Lmao, I've run out of stuff to say now 😆
crazy2012 thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 12 years ago
I need one help again :D

how can I describe a dead scene?

one of the lead is crushed under wheel of a bus and other is seeing it, bt can't do anything, so how can i describe the pain so that readers also can feel the pain??

thanks
KaaliBilli thumbnail
Explorer Thumbnail Engager Level 1 Thumbnail Fascinator 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 12 years ago

Originally posted by: crazy2012

I need one help again :D

how can I describe a dead scene?

one of the lead is crushed under wheel of a bus and other is seeing it, bt can't do anything, so how can i describe the pain so that readers also can feel the pain??

thanks



Let me try.

It was a scene from a bad action movie where the scene slowed down to profound the effect of morbidity on the viewers. She could see him on the other side of the street in a hurry to get to her side. The right side. The other side. He didn't see it coming. No one ever does, probably. The bus moved in its own pace with a collective urgent needs of the men and women it carried in its belly. Did the driver take his eyes off the road for a second to shout at the passenger who climbed the moving bus? She didn't know. She only knows that the driver didn't stop. The man on the other side walking in a daze to get to the other side, her side, the right side, didn't see it coming.

Horror etched on faces. Everything in her world reduced to a blur when a splash of red decorated asphalt. Vehicles honked and tires screeched to halt. There is a scream - loud and blood curling. She realizes it's her own voice. Bones crack, the soft noise of pop-pop-pop thundering in her ears and shooting shrapnel on her skin. Her heart feels wretched as if someone has put their hands inside it and is squeezing it repeatedly. Her knees give away when a thin trail of blood sticks to her shoes. She collapses on the street and starts crawling on the tar ignoring the spectacle she was making. Her knees scrape and blood oozes. When her blood mingles with his, she finds a strange satisfaction in that. His hands are trembling. His eyes are closed and his breathing doesn't help the broken ribs.

She holds his bloodied hands in hers and then she let the gutting sobs out. Her wails brings tear or two in the eyes of bystanders. She holds his broken body in her arms and washes him with her tears.

molten_lava thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 6
Posted: 12 years ago

Originally posted by: crazy2012

I need one help again :D

how can I describe a dead scene?

one of the lead is crushed under wheel of a bus and other is seeing it, bt can't do anything, so how can i describe the pain so that readers also can feel the pain??

thanks


To make the scene more impactful, the scene of death should be sudden, unexpected without any signs of the event happening at all. And it also involves what do you want the surviving partner to feel? Do you want him/her to feel guilty? Or just shocked?
If you want to make the surviving partner feel guilty, make them fight just before the death. If not, write one of the most romantic scenes just before it and when death follows later, the shock hits the readers full on.

Now how do you describe it?
If I were you, I would make them kiss just before it. So it can be something like: (assuming the girl is dying)

"The soft touch of her lips still lingered on his, as he walked away from her with a silly smile on his face. Even without turning back to glance at her, he could visualize her cheeks blushing, nervously chewing her bottom lip. But he did turn around, just for the fun to see her flustered up once more with his gaze.

He did see her smile, melting his heart with love for her.

Only that he didn't know it would be the last time he would be rewarded with that warmth.

And before he could grasp what was happening, time froze and so did he, his arm outstretched to reach out for her, the blood draining right down his face, his mind freezing numb.

He saw the love of his life freeze with time, the smile dying with her, being crushed under the wheels of fate as the bus slammed right into her.

Her name just died midway as it escaped his lips.

But there was nothing he could do to save her. The road separated them at that moment, but now, death replaced it.

Ok, this was me being dramatic.😆 and it was drafted in three minutes. So it may not be exactly good. But I think you have got some idea now on how to proceed with it.
And to make it even more dramatic, stop the update right there. That is one way to leave the readers speechless.😆


RapChick101 thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 12 years ago
Okay, hi.

So basically I have just begun to write an ArHi SS and well I want to you know like want it to get a good response.
Any advertising or marketting suggestions, anyone?

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