Verbosity (Ansh/SagUn OS/FF thread) - New chap on page 9 - Page 2

OS: A new beginning

As the sun peeked out to greet the new day, its glow slowly but surely spread its aura across the deeply silent room, claiming its territory an inch at a time. The blissfully sleeping couple, entwined under a soft blue coverlet, remained unaware. As the sunrays crept up their bodies, reaching Anandi's torso, she just dug her head deeper into the firmest, most-comfortable pillow she had ever slept on. Hearing the soft purrs emanating from the crook of his shoulder, he cracked his eyes open, only to see the most fascinating sight he had ever seen in his life. His Anandi, fresh as a dewdrop, nestled into him, head resting on his shoulder, one slight arm thrown over his chest, fingers curled into the soft mat of hair on his chest. His lips curling into a smile as he recalled what had transpired last night. His deepest desires fulfilled, and that too so quickly. If he had not been there himself, he would never have believed it.

And Anandi, the original child bride, as innocent in the ways of love as a girl out of school. Had she ever been married? Didn't seem so. Shy, awkward, inhibited, yet, so eager to learn and to please. A study in contrasts ' shy, yet full of spunk; awkward, yet full of confidence; inhibited, yet oh so open to showering love. He watched awestruck as the beauty of a woman unfolded as the sunrays traveled up her body ' no one could be more beautiful than a woman first thing in the morning, without any makeup or adornment. As the sun reached her eyes, her nose twitched slightly, her eyes fluttered, and she tried to burrow even deeper into him, avoiding the sudden glare in her eyes. Raising his hand, he shielded her eyes from the sun, watching as she suddenly blinked them open to peer around like a sleepy kitten that had been rudely awakened.

As their eyes locked, he watched a wave of rose wash up her neck, suffusing her cheeks becomingly. Her eyes slammed shut again, even as she curled up even tighter against him. Holding her close, he brushed of errant strands of hair from her face, opening up his view. Seeing the slight scratches on her face and neck, he brushed gentle, soothing kisses across them. Squirming away from him, she put her hand over his lips to stop the onslaught. "Ouch! Shiv, aapko shave karne ki bahut zaroorat hai." "Kyon Anandiji, kal toh aap bilkul bura nahi maani..." he smirked. Flushing even deeper, and surprising him with her strength, she hopped out of bed, pulling the coverlet along with her. Tucking it safely around herself, she stuck her tongue out at him, saying, "Shiv, maa intezaar kar rahi hogi. Tayyar hona hai'" Propping himself up on his elbows, he watched as Anandi rushed around the place, picking and discarding clothes and jewelry, and making a dash for the bathroom. Picking up his jammies, he went to the window, waiting, for the first time in his life, for his wife to get ready.

"Shiv'" At the hesitant request in her voice, he turned, jaw almost crashing to the ground at the vision he saw. Anandi stood at the entrance to the dressing room, towel tucked under her chin. Her wet hair cascaded down her back. All she wore was a purple satin petticoat and a red silk blouse. As he walked slowly to her, almost in a trance, she turned slowly, presenting the unbuttoned back of her blouse. "Shiv, mere haath pahunch nahin rahe, doriyaan nahin hai na. Kya aap madad'" With shivering hands, he drew the two ends of the blouse together, shrouding the delicate pink skin and wrestling to get the first delicate hook slotted in. "Shiv!!! Blouse phat jaayega!! What are you doing??" Looking chagrined, he spun her around, "So, what can I do about this? It's not as if I have plenty of practice'" Anandi burst out laughing at his petulance, "Accha, theek hai baba' try to be gentle, that's it." Applying his attention to the task at hand, and completing it without mishap, he brushed a stray kiss over the nape of her neck, sending shivers down her spine. "Accha baba, can you go for a bath now, so I get ready?"

Almost pushing him into the bathroom, she quickly started draping her red and purple silk bandhni sari, brushing her hair out, applying makeup, and putting on her jewelry. Heaving a deep sigh, she realized that she better get used to an audience ' Shiv was watching her every step of the way, while brushing his teeth, while wiping his face, and while doing nothing at all.

"Anandi, aaj pehli baar maine aapko sari mein dekha hai' you are looking like a pocket-sized Apsara. And are you going to put your hair up?" At the shy shake of her head, he smiled adoringly at her. Breaking his trance, she held out the sindoordan to him. Walking slowly forward, getting as close as he could get to her, he adorned her with the vermilion that proclaimed her his, moving his hand gently over her head, almost as if blessing her for being what she was. She reached up on tiptoes to brush her lips over his chin, skipping out of his way as he reached out to grab her. Giggling her trademark giggle, which always made his heart ache for more, she almost ran to the door, "Shiv, main maa ke paas jaa rahi hoon. Come down quick' halwa chahiye na?"

Quickly peeking through the many doors of Kesar Bagh, she finally found the kitchen, where Ma and Choti Ma were already at work. Bending quickly to get their blessings, "Ma, sorry, late ho gaya na?" Ira smiled gently and caressed her new bahu's cheeks, "Koi baat nahin, beta. Come, today is your first day in this house. Would you like to make the sweet dish or something else?" "Maa, main halwa aur aloo puri bana leti hoon. Bahut jaldi nimat jaayega."

As she cooked up a storm in the kitchen, the rest of the family trailed downstairs. As she took the blessings of all the elders, Mahi stayed back to pull his bhabhi's legs. Sanchi had walked right past the kitchen, until Alok sent her back to greet her bhabhi. As the delicious aroma of the food wafted through the house, Shiv was drawn downstairs like a moth to the fire. Wearing a plain white shirt and fitted blue jeans, he stopped at the doorway to see his bride flitting about madly, while Mahi kept pace with her. Smiling wryly at his competition, Shiv stayed to silently enjoy the domesticity.

"Arre Mahi, hara dhaniya kahan hai? I need to garnish the aloo." Quickly beginning to chop the dhaniya, she suddenly dropped the knife as the tea began to boil over. Sauntering into the kitchen, Shiv picked up the knife, "Biwi, main madat kar doon?" As she spun around to stare at him, they lost themselves in each other's eyes again. "Ouch!" "Kya kar diya, bhaiyya?!!! Hamesha ki tarah dhyaan kahin aur and nazrein kahin aur!" Anandi rushed to Shiv's side and grabbed his hand. Seeing the furiously flowing blood, she popped his finger quickly into her mouth. Her eyes glared daggers at him. The pain quickly ebbed away as she suckled his finger like she would have done a child's. As if in a dream, he raised his hand to cup her face. "Ahem, main ab bhi yahin hoon, bhaiyya. Romance karne ka dil ho toh, should I go?"

Blushing tomato red, Anandi spit out his finger like it was a sour karela and Shiv stuck it behind his back. "Mahi! How can you say such things?? Kahin bhi, kuch bhi bolte ho!" Laughing out loud, Mahi said, "Bhaiyya, aur aap jo kahin bhi kuch bhi shuru kar dete ho, uska kya?" Walking backwards, Mahi beat a quick retreat, satisfied with his morning's work.

Letter to the viewers: Main Anandi Hoon

Dear viewers,

I hope you all are fine today, on this cold, yet pleasant, morning. I do appreciate all the love a vast majority of you shower on me. And I do understand that some of you hate me for what I am - everything that you are not.

I am God's favorite child, given that I have triumphed, inspite - or perhaps, because - of all the strife he has laid in my path.

Starting my life as a girl in rural Rajasthan was the first cross to bear. Bright beyond belief, in today's day and time, I became a child bride - a Balika Vadhu - at an age where other girls play with their dolls. Is that my fault?

I began life afresh, in a new house, with a new family that had ambiguous feelings about me. At an age where I did not understand the meaning of separation, I was asked to segregate my feelings into two - for my "old" family and for my "new." Is that my fault?

I was torn away from my favorite companions - my books - at a time I needed them most. I was told they interfered with my duties. Is that my fault?

I slowly forged my new relationships, against all odds. A new ma, a new bapusa, a new friend, a dadisa who saw strictness as the only way to break me in to my new life, a new village... I succeeded at some steps while failing at others. As a child struggling against all odds, was that my fault?

I grew up quickly, donning the "beendni" mantle, becoming the person everybody turned to for help and advise. I became way older than my age. Is that my fault?

I started looking at my best friend in a new light. The light I was supposed to look at him in. My husband, my caretaker, the only man I could talk to (openly). I fell in love with him, with the thought of him & I together. His aspirations became mine. His dreams were mine. I supported him in everything he did. Is that my fault?

I saved his life. I took a bullet for him. But, people started thinking I was losing myself. So, a new bride was found for him. It was a failed step, but it laid the path for our ultimate destruction. Is that my fault?

I sent him off to the big, bad city with a heavy heart. Go, live your dreams I said to him, in my heart of hearts. I cried silent tears each time he left, and each time I sat in isolation. Is that my fault?

He grew up. He grew away. His aspirations and dreams took him on a path different from mine. The distance between us grew. He thought I was to blame because I could not match him in his new-found coolness and status in life. Was that really my fault?

He came home with a new wife in tow. He celebrated his relationship, as if he had done something to be proud of. I reacted in the only way I knew - with calmness, acceptance, and a deep sorrow. I am sure you all know the famous quote "If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they're yours; if they don't they never were." So, I set him free. And he was not mine to keep. And he never was. Was that my fault?

I gained the title of divorcee. The world cannot be silenced. Of course, to some of it, I must be at fault. But, my family (and finally, dadisa) rallied around me. They lifted me up from the depths and brought me into the light. I gained an occupation. I got a title other than Mrs Jagdish Singh. I came into my own finally. I was independent in thought, finally. Is that my fault?

Then, another man came into my life. As a man who saved my life, as a colleague, as a strong individual who I respected and looked up to. And as a person who slowly became my friend. Is that my fault?

Then, dadisa started dreaming her own dreams. She saw a life partner for me in Shiv. She started plotting and planning to get us together. She convinced the rest of my family too. Shiv and I were thrown together at every opportunity. We progressed from friends to best friends. Was that my fault?

And then dadisa asked Shiv if he would marry me. He agreed. I was horrified. I fought. I didn't want this bane called marriage and all that it entailed - the trust, the love - all for one person. I couldn't face that pain again. Was that my fault?

The fates conspired against me. My mother bound my hands firmly with her deathbed vow. The deed was done. I was to be married. My best friend rallied around me, understood where I was coming from, and had no expectations, or so he said. Was that my fault?

We got engaged. I walked through that in a zombie-like state; my only thought that of my mother and her vow. Shiv was happy. I was neutral. Then, Jagya reappeared in our lives, in a condition that was unimaginable. My life went through many upheavals again. But, I was glad about one thing. My heart did not dance to his tune any longer. I only wanted what was best for my family. People misunderstood me again. Was that my fault?

Shiv was noble. He tried to hand me back to Jagya, like a toy that was being bartered. I was angry. I was hurt. But I could not break my vow. I refused to let Shiv back down. Was that my fault? Yes, it was. Because I was being selfish for the first time in my life. "I" considered what was best for me at that time.

But, I had told Shiv where he stood vis-a-vis me and my feelings. He was my Rock of Gibraltar, my one hope for the future, the one place where I felt safe. Was that my fault? For wanting to be safe, secure, and loved for the first time in my life?

So, the marriage proceeded as planned. Grand in its simplicity. Wonderful in the hope it brought to the lives of so many women who had lost hope. I went with the flow, loving the love I received from everyone, loving the adoration I saw in Shiv's eyes. I was sad about leaving my house but I was also excited about my new home and family. The Shekhars - how warm and loving they were. I could handle the small problems that existed. I was keen to begin a new life. Is that my fault?

And then my bubble burst. I realized just how much Shiv loved me - me, the unwanted castaway. I realized his expectations. Yes, I woke up late. I woke up to the awareness of all that a "real" marriage entailed. I realized I was capable of fear. Fear of myself and my failures. Fear of history repeating itself. Fear of happiness, which could never last forever, according to me. Life was a hard teacher. Is that fear my fault?

I discovered that I could try to deceive. I also discovered that that deceived knew me and my foibles too well. I discovered the power of true love. I discovered the depth of faith one could have. I discovered how I longed to be part of that love and faith. I discovered that I needed to open the doors of my closed heart and mind - as Shiv had once asked me too - to embrace life afresh. I discovered that I am human - full of insecurities, full of sorrow, and full of fear. Is that my fault or am I just human, finally?

So, viewers, I am human - just like you. I am scared of new challenges - just like you. I want to love and be loved - just like you. I am gathering up courage for my new start in life - just like some of you. I find it difficult to leave all old memories behind - perhaps like some of you.

I am struggling with my new identity, with my new life. I am in love - yes, I am. My mind knows it, but I have not accepted it yet. I will one day. And that day will be the day of my rebirth.

With a lot of love,

Yours (in hope),

Anandi

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Disclaimer:

This is Anandi talking from the viewpoint of the author - VerboseG (who tends to get carried away when she starts talking/writing). The views are solely mine.

This post is not meant to be pro Anandi, pro Shiv, pro/anti anybody. Kindly refrain from any kind of kabbadi on this thread.

Please also forgive any factual/typographical errors.

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Letter: Main Shiv Hoon

Good morning to all my beautiful viewers!

It is a cold and foggy day here in Jaitsar. As I sat enjoying my morning cup of coffee and reading my newspaper, I was wondering what all of you thought of me. I know that all of you seem to love my looks. But, what to do? I cannot take credit for that. Genetics plays a major role here. All I do is maintain myself by exercising as much as possible and eating the right food. I do have a fondness for sweets and the oily stuff that so makes up part of the daily Rajasthani diet. But, you must remember that our bodies are accustomed to that, and I do my utmost to work it off. The proof of the pudding is, as always, in the eating.

As I watch my beautiful wife skittering around, finishing off her early morning tasks, I am forced to recall the roller coaster I have ridden ever since I met her almost seven months ago. A posting to Jaitsar, which was just being converted from a village to a district was like a dream coming true. Though I was dissuaded by many from taking on this small posting, I decided to pursue my dream of doing something in rural India. Little did I know what a pivotal turning point this would be in my life.

Driving across the villages that constituted the district on the day of my swearing in, I chanced on a surreal sight. A runaway horse carriage with a girl shrieking for help! Was I in some sort of fairy tale? A man of action, I took charge, leaping from my car into the carriage, wrestling with the horse for control, and finally succeeding in stopping the horse, though it did succeed in tossing the both of us out on the rocks. As I dusted myself off, I looked around to see in the girl was OK. I had the breath knocked out of me, both literally and figuratively. There was this amazingly beautiful girl, face contorted in distress, hair flowing, clad in the traditional dress of the region. Spotting her odhni at some distance, I picked it up and approached her. Seeing her awkwardness, I softly draped it around her shoulders, watching as she hugged it close.

Imagine my shock when I dropped her back, only to realize that she was the sarpanch of Jaitsar - the acclaimed Anandiji, who I had read about and heard about. The lady sarpanch who was held in esteem by so many, and rightfully so, for all the work she had done. It would be my privilege and honor to work with her for the betterment of Jaitsar.

Little did I know how enthralled and fascinated I would get by Jaitsar, its denizens, its problems, and by Anandiji (and her family). Anandi and I didn't hit it off at first. She thought that I was a city boy who would not understand the realities of day-to-day village life. She was obtuse, opinionated, and came with a huge chip on her shoulder. We had our run-ins, and I often wondered why she was so revered. And then, I saw her working, mentally, physically, whole-heartedly, for Jaitsar. I realized that she had become one with the place she lived in. She was a mystery, one that I wanted to unravel.

I became close to her family, especially her Dadi sa, who welcomed me into her heart and home. I became a regular visitor there, enjoying the attention and warmth I so missed. I watched Anandi there too. I saw how much her family loved her, and how much she loved them. What I couldn't fathom was the deep sadness I saw lurking in the depths of her eyes when she thought no one was looking. I didn't understand till somebody told me that she was not the daughter, as I has thought so far, but the abandoned daughter-in-law. The mystery deepened.

As we worked together, I found a newfound respect for me in her eyes. I sometimes saw a spark of what she must have been before she was abandoned. I lived for those moments in time when her eyes lit up and she forgot who and what she was. I enjoyed being with her. I enjoyed our exchange of ideas. I wanted to know her better. I dug around to find out more about her, but the villagers seemed to have closed rank about her. My only hope was Dadisa, who did let bits and pieces of information drop. I craved for more. The biggest shocker for me was when Anandi announced during an interview that she herself was a Balika Vadhu (a child bride) and that was why she understood them and worked for their upliftment. No wonder she was the woman she was.

And then my best buddy arrived. Ashima - my one good friend with whom I could share everything. Ashima and Anandi became good friends. Anandi started accompanying us on our sightseeing trips. I looked at her in the rearview mirror and couldn't help reflecting on how her eyes sparkled with the joy of living and her cheeks glowed with good cheer. I enjoyed her closeness with Ashi, and I enjoyed the togetherness that all three of us share. But, I am dumb in some matters. I didn't realize that Ashi was in love with me. Even if I did, I burrowed the thought deep. I didn't want anything to rock the boat. But Anandi did realize what Ashi was going through. And Ashi realized something else. She nudged my thoughts until I realized that all the awe and respect I thought I felt for Anandi was something else altogether. Anandi was my ideal woman.

My birthday brought yet another turning point. I never expected that, in a place far away from my family, I would be surprised by the family to which I was getting very attached. What a lavish celebration it was. But, the icing on the cake was Anandi - glowing, ethereal, a pocket-sized princess. I couldn't take my eyes off her. And then, DS clutched at my arm, bringing me back to reality. "Will you marry my girl?" I seemed to have been waiting for those words all my life! Yes, yes, and yes, my heart screamed. My joy knew no bounds. I floated through the rest of that night and the next morning on a cloud of happiness.

Little did I expect the rude awakening that awaited me. She did not want to marry me. She told me off, she told her family off! She didn't want to marry me and had never seen me from that angle. It was a shocker. Here I was, this prime male specimen, chased after by countless girls, and she had not seen me at all. I was the collector, and that was it. Our budding friendship suffered. How I missed it. I wanted the familiar warmth of her laughter. Her tinkling voice. Her scolding. But, I had lost her, and with that, the world seemed less bright.

And then tragedy struck her (once again). Her beloved mother left her forever. But in that departure, she left a window of opportunity open for me. She made Anandi vow that she would marry me, and Anandi being who she is, had to see that promise through. I thought long and hard. I wanted to look after her. I wanted to be part of her life. But, did I want a marriage of obligation - I didn't. But, my heart crumbled when I heard her beg desperately, for me to marry her and help her fulfill her vow. I could not say no to the love of my life. I vowed to myself that I would make this work.

How my heart broke every day, when I saw her stoic, suffering face. I suffered along with her. I started making her take baby steps toward happiness again. She starting giving me fleeting glimpses of the girl she used to be. I slowly became the face she looked out for, her best friend. I was content. My plan was in place. I told her I loved her, but she was under no obligation to return that love.

My family fell in love with Anandi too. Well, all except one; but I guess that was expected. Anandi and I can handle her over time, and we will. Our engagement arrived, a day of great happiness, but it brought with itself Anand's biggest nemesis. Jagya. I didn't realize it then, but Anandi's self-esteem went on a downward spiral after that. Her memories were refreshed. And Jagya was soon up to his old tricks, trying to sow the seeds of doubt. That didn't work, but something else did. His pleas for Anandi did. And, I made my biggest error ever, I decided to hand her over to Jagya, just as if she was some toy. My love for her blinded me to my foolishness; I thought I was doing Anandi a favor by returning the love of her life to her. I hurt her deeply, making her return to Square A in our relationship.

But, I am thankful she is a fighter. She didn't allow me to back down. And our marriage preparations started. She started smiling at me again. She started glowing again. She started responding to me and my jokes. I was content. It was a beginning. Our marriage took place. We were the cause of 14 other beleaguered women getting a new start in life. I saw the joy of accomplishment in her eyes. I saw the hope, and I was hopeful. I saw her embrace my family, and I wanted her to embrace me.

We reached Kesar Bagh. Amidst all the teasing and jokes, I forgot for a while that she was not mentally prepared for the next stage. She was taking each day as it came. Not looking forward in hope, nor in despair. She was taking one step at a time, under the assumption that I was too. My hopes were up. I looked forward to the next step - the physical aspect of our relationship. I forgot. I forgot that I was dealing with a fragile butterfly called Anandi, who needed a lot more help to emerge from her cocoon. I scared her, by telling her my hopes, my dreams. She retreated further into her cocoon. She actually tried to deceive me.

That woke me up quick. I backed off, reassuring her that I was ready to wait. Reassuring her that she need not fear my touch. I realized, finally, that she was scared of intimacy, perhaps because the only time that she gave herself as a demonstration of her love, she was cruelly rejected. She feared that happening again. That would never, ever happen with me. I adore her, but being physically close is not my only aspiration. I want her totally - heart, body, and soul. No half measures. And, that will happen, and it will happen soon. But only when she come and says, "Shiv, I love you. Will you make me yours?"

And so, we wait. She, to reach that level of comfort. And I, to ensure that she does. In the meantime, I am enjoying our conversations, the nitty gritties of daily married life, the tug of war between our families, the slow immersion in each others' thoughts, and the light teasing that draws a smile and a laugh from her. I am a patient man, and this is my acid test. I will succeed.

So, viewers, I thank you for your time. I have rambled on, as usual. But, I felt like talking today. So, I did.

With a lot of love,

Yours (in confidence)

ShivRaj Shekhar

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Disclaimer:

This is Shiv talking from the viewpoint of the author - VerboseG (who tends to get carried away when she starts talking/writing). The views are solely mine.

This post is not meant to be pro Anandi, pro Shiv, pro/anti anybody. Kindly refrain from any kind of kabbadi on this thread.

Please also forgive any factual/typographical errors.

PS: Chi Shiv, tum kitna bolte ho!

Letter: Main Makhan Hoon

My dear viewers,

I am nodding off tonight. My day's work is done, and I am extremely tired. I want to sleep, but I so need to share my feelings with someone <sigh>.

I feel so unloved these days. Earlier, there was just me in the serial. I had the total limelight - being the do-all and know-it-all of the haveli and the serial. Ever since we began airing six days a week, I have competition - Nathu in Kesar Bagh and Pappu in Circuit House.

I haven't met Nathu yet, but that Pappu! What does he think of himself... grr!!! Comparing himself and me? Me, who has served for more than 18 years, without a break! And how I hate Dadisa for making us hug and become friends. As if I have no taste in friends!!! But what to do? It is a question of roti, kapda, aur makkan, so the pretence is on - khoob jamega rang, jab mil baithenge teen yaar - Nathu, Pappu, aur Makku!

And have you noticed how much work they make me do nowadays! Every time one of the denizens of the haveli or the Circuit House take a short break, I am recalled from my peaceful sleeping in the gaushala by someone or the other. Kitna kaam karoon? Cleaning, sweeping, swabbing, and now pulling the serial along on my frail shoulders. How much burden can I tote, and for how long?

Take yesterday, for example. I got up, looking forward to doing my day's work, as I am wont to do - with great verve and zeal, often unrecognized and unnoticed. I usually complete my work at rocket speed and reappear only if I am beckoned. But alas, the new apple of everyone's eye is eyeing my job. She gets up before me and completes my work for me. She is making me redundant! I hope I am not laid off in these times of recession.

I came to IF to take a break and relax my mind, but what do I see here?? You all want me to get married?? At this old age? And to whom? The heroine of the story?? You want me to be beaten up black and blue?

Quite apart, there are quite enough wives floating across the screen these days, and I see what a mess they create in everyone's lives!

Anandi bitiya played I love him, I love him not for so many days that Shiv bhaiyya put in a word with the CM to get a short break. Sumi bhabhisa is sleeping so much these days that Bhairon bhaisa has employed a brass band to wake her up. Gehna bhabhisa is already on bedrest - don't know which jhola chaap doctors she is visiting. Sugna bitiya is always absconding with her husband, leaving the upbringing of her children to her in-laws. Aur kaun kaun hai??

So, to conclude, I am happy as I am - status quo! Live and let live my friends...

"Aur bhi gham hai zamaane mein, mohabbat se sivaye."

With love,

Makhan Kaka

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NB: This is a fun post. Please take it in the spirit it is intended. In case you can't, please refrain from written kabbadi here.

Originally posted by: Vedo

MB, am so so so happy yo decided to do this!! 🥳

Will re-read each and every one of them and comment for sure!!!