IPKKND SS: Cracks in Perfection (Chapter 2, pg. 13)

srujie thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#1
Cracks in Perfection Index:
Prologue-pg. 1 (below)
The first paragraph is a general description and each of the following paragraphs is from a different point of view. Any guesses who's speaking?

Prologue

She was beautiful. She had long, silky hair which framed her flawless heart shaped face. Her skin was a delicate porcelain and her lips a rosy pink. But these were not the details that made her beautiful. It was her twinkling hazel eyes that shone mischievously and her infectious smile, the aura of joy that seemed to pervade the very picture frame. She was perfection.

She didn't know who the woman in the portrait was. But she was beautiful, despite her strange sense of fashion. But of course not everyone could grow up in a privileged household like she had. Not everyone had an uncle who owned one of the most successful businesses in the fashion enterprise. Maybe no one had told this woman that pom-poms were not very attractive on a salwar kameez, especially when the top half of the dress was velvet. But none of that mattered. Her odd clothing was forgotten soon enough in the face of her beautiful smile. She couldn't help staring at this woman's smile whenever she passed the portrait, which was situated right at the entrance of their house. No one smiled like this woman in her house. No one seemed to be capable of the happiness this woman managed to exude so effortlessly. If she had to make a dictionary with pictures to supplement the words, this woman's smile would define beautiful to perfection.

He missed her. She was eccentric, it was true, but that was just one of the things that made her the more endearing. She was absolutely crazy; she had the wildest ideas that she somehow made look like the most rational course of action. He was no less, he supposed. But without her there as his partner-in-crime, his own natural childishness had diminished considerably. He was not the man he had been ten years ago. He had been forced to mature and there were now lines of pain, of sorrow, of grief on his face, which had only ever been lined with laughter. He missed her laughter, the most beautiful sound he had ever heard. The picture was the first thing his eyes sought whenever he came back into this house, the house that was primarily associated with every horrible memory he possessed. The picture was all that remained of her. He could no longer hear her laughter echoing through the empty rooms of the mansion, but at least he still had her smile; the picture had captured that to perfection.

She tried not to look at the portrait for with the picture came the memories. The guilt was already an ever-present burden on her shoulders but the memories only added the weight of pain to her heavy heart. But her eyes were involuntarily drawn to the picture, hard as she tried to resist the temptation. But the smile always drew her in. The memories were painful, but they were bittersweet. She would never forget the happiness that had come into her home with this woman. But then they had forced her to leave with their mistrust, with their harsh words intended to drive her away. And she had left, taking away the happiness with her. Now all that remained was a house, a building which people inhabited. It had been a home for the short time she had been there. It had been perfection.

The portrait was a constant reminder of everything he had lost. He had wrenched her out of his barren life, which had briefly been filled with the warmth of her love. But the happiness had been ephemeral. He had managed to destroy it, as he did everything. He had crushed her faith in him, broken her trust. But this picture had captured her before he had shattered her beautiful, innocent world. This portrait was the image of the woman he had fallen in love with. He could finally acknowledge it now, that he had loved her all along. But it was too late. He had not been honest with himself when he had the chance of living in heaven. And now, he was left to burn in hell. All that was left of the beautiful memories was this portrait. All he had now were remnants of a shattered paradise, the cracks in perfection.

*THIS IS ENTIRELY MY OWN WORK. PLEASE DO NOT COPY OR REPRODUCE*

So what did you guys think? Please do like and comment!
For my other works, here is a link to my index:
Edited by srujie - 11 years ago

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A_R_S thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#2
Wow I can't believe. For the very first time I'm first in commenting. Prologue is superb.

First paragraph describes a picture of Khushi. Second tells the story from Arnav's niece pov, third from NK's one, fourth from Anjali's one and fifth from Arnav's pov.
Edited by A_R_S - 12 years ago
Downhill thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#3
sounds good...prologue looks really promising
P4rveen12 thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#4
Wow an amazing start, the prologue was written so beautifully and the whole update was so emotional and sad. So I'm assuming the portrait is khushi's and the two people's thoughts are Arnav and Anjali, so khushi left as they didn't trust her. Continue soon, eager to read next part and thanks for the PM xx
srujie thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#5

Originally posted by: P4rveen12

Wow an amazing start, the prologue was written so beautifully and the whole update was so emotional and sad. So I'm assuming the portrait is khushi's and the two people's thoughts are Arnav and Anjali, so khushi left as they didn't trust her. Continue soon, eager to read next part and thanks for the PM xx



arnav and anjali have their point of view but theres two more people involved.
P4rveen12 thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#6

Originally posted by: srujie



arnav and anjali have their point of view but theres two more people involved.


Yeah just read the story again, so its probably Arnav's niece and the other person is probably NK xx
yoga123 thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#7

Superb prologue...let me guess the POV of each person described in each paragraph in the following order starting from the second paragraph...Arnav's niece, NK's, Anjali's and last Arnav's...They all mistrusted her and she left them...very interesting story...very eager to know next part...Please continue...Thanks for the PM

malose thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#8
wow amezing cant wait to read the coming chapters
the 1 is arnavs nice and the 2 is Nk and the 3 is anjeli and the last one is arnav
bout i have to say i lovd the nk dialog
when is the 1 chapter coming?
shreyasonia thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#9
Wonderful...hmmm.. well I think a few other have guessed it as well...so its Arnav's niece, NK, Anjali and Arnav.Looking forward to more wonderful reading.😊
Snoowfall thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#10
Please continue, nice prologue...

First one general, as you mentioned, second one Arnav's niece, third NK, fourth Anjali, fifth Arnav...

My guess
Edited by arnkhunostalgic - 12 years ago

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