FF : FROZEN. . .Part 19 updated - Page 20

Arnav sat staring at Khushi...

Sadness pervaded his entire being.

What this woman had gone through because of a lie was a travesty, and what he had done to her was criminal.

And once again his memory demons rose up, reminding him of the numerous occasions over the last couple of months when Khushi looked so happy and he would do something to eradicate her smile, he pushed her away, his anger overriding everything...

He looked at his wife's beautiful face...

He hated seeing her here like this...

Seeing her cry gave his heart pain, but seeing her lay here after almost dying gave his heart lacerations...

He wanted to just pick her up and carry her safely home to his bed...

Tears sprang to his eyes and he fought them back, increasing the pounding in his sore head...she had never been in his bed...he made her sleep outside...

His heart plunged in pain again...

Khushi had suffered tremendous anguish already for his stupid mistakes.

He'd be damned if he was once again the cause of her pain...

His head was throbbing and he leant down to rest his head next to her...slowly falling asleep...

Arnav woke up an hour later...his mind groggy, trying to figure out where he was...he saw that he was slumped in a threadbare chair in the intensive care ward...all the events from hours before came screaming back to him...Without any thought, other than to see if she was alive as quickly as possible, Arnav grabbed her hand. His shaking fingers pressed against the pulse, and he collapsed against her body feeling the reassuringly faint beat...even though the monitors were beeping consistently, he needed to feel it coming from her...

Once he felt her flickering pulse he slightly calmed...only to realize his head was pounding like a jackhammer. But that pain was easy, compared to the pain in his heart...

"Khushi...can you hear me? Khushi i'm here...I'm here and i'm not leaving...I need you...I need you Khushi ...Wake up please..." his voice was coarse, tired from crying and screaming...

Khushi started regaining consciousness, she heard beeping...then she heard..."I need you, I need you Khushi...Wake up please..."

She gritted her teeth and then tried to force long, deep breaths through her body. Only to have intense pain spike through her chest...

Arnav heard her gasp and start to make choking sounds...that sent shivers of dread down his spine...

He rushed to the door screaming for the doctor...

Almost instantly the doctor was as her side...

"what's wrong...don't you dare let her go again...!!!!!!"

Arnav was trying to survive this right along with Khushi...when this was all over he'd hold her safe in his arms, then he would let his emotions go...but now he had to keep strong...

Fear kept his feet frozen to the floor. He was so afraid to move, breathe, or ask anything... If Khushi was fading again, he really, truly, did not want to know. If he stayed here, not knowing ' at least there was still hope.

The doctor brought her spluttering under control...and Khushi drifted back into her subconscious...

"she's stable again...her throat and chest muscle are probably in pain from the effect of the cold...she regained consciousness momentarily and tried to breathe on her own..."

"she woke up? She...she...are you saying..."

The doctor smiled briefly and nodded..."Yes, she woke up for a few seconds...keep talking to her...she can hear everything you say...since she has momentarily regained consciousness i should prepare you for when she fully wakes..."

Arnav became anxious..."prepare me? What do you mean?"

"we have no way of knowing how she will react when she awakes. She may be completely fine and just emotional over the ordeal, or she may experience some memory loss, disorientation, hypoglycemia...but the most common is Dysphoria ..."

Arnav was almost in tears again..."how much more is she going to have to take!!!" he thought...

"Dysphoria is a mental and emotional condition in which a person experiences intense feelings of depression, discontent and indifference to the world around them...if this occurs in a patient that is already emotionally hurt or depressed then the effects would only worsen..."

Now literally frightened, seeing as Khushi HAD been depressed and hurt already, Arnav asked, "worsen? Worsen how!?"

"well, like i said, a trauma like this would make the patient feel indifference...and this would heighten the risk of suicide..."

"WHAT!?"

"it's sad but true...the inner turmoil becomes too much...but Sir, i don't think i've ever seen such a loving and protective husband...your wife will be in safe hands no matter the outcome..." ...the doctor left quickly going to the next room...

Once again, Arnav was alone with his wife...

He just stared at her...

Shocked into immobility...

He now had a new fear to face...

Fiery streaks of guilt pumped through him...Khushi WAS already emotionally hurting...all her spirit had been beaten down...

He'd selfishly and cowardly denied her from love, played with her heart, he lied with every breath, he hurt her with his words, he married her just to keep his sister happy, which in turn brought out Shyam's psychotic behaviour... and now she was in serious condition and almost died because of all his stupid decisions...His heart plunged into darkness...

"I won't let anything happen to you sweetheart...I'm not ever going to leave your side...EVER...do you hear me Khushi!? When you wake up, no one, no matter who they are will dare hurt you...from this moment, you are first and foremost in my life...I am NOT going to lose you..."

He held her hand to his lips...her fingers were cold...he kissed almost every part of her hand letting his warm breath heat her skin...

Some doctors re-entered the room ... "Mr. Raizada, is there anyone else that you would like us to contact?"

"no."

"she has no other family?"

"she does...can you please wait until tomorrow to contact them...i just want to be to be with her at the moment..."

"ofcourse..also there was a man calling asking after her and yourself..."

This jerked arnav to attention...he tightened his grip on khushi's hand...he looked at the doctors saying, "What man..."

"he didnt leave his name...we aren't legally allowed to give him any information other than if a patient is here of not, so he knows your wife is here and he just told us to tell you that he'd be back soon to finish his job..."

"Arnav's hard eyes glared at the doctor..."do NOT let anyone, ANYONE into this room without my permission. I don't CARE who it is...her sister, my sister, her amma...I . DON'T . CARE . You will tell them to wait, and inform me FIRST. Have I made myself clear?"

"ofcourse...sir may i say, i really think she's drawing a lot of her strength from you...she's very lucky to have such a caring husband..." and the doctor left...

Arnav felt sick..." but I haven't been a caring husband..." he wept softly while clinging to Khushi's hand...he was scared to take his fingers off her pulse...

"Khushi, the doctors say you can hear me...my heart says you can hear me..." he took a deep shaky breath...

"I CAME FOR YOU KHUSHI...i was scared beyond belief when you weren't at your Buaji's house...I searched for you for hours...I'm so sorry for getting there too late...If i got to you sooner you wouldn't be laying here fighting to stay alive...If i hadn't have treated you so abominably you wouldn't be here...I'm so sorry Khushi...so so sorry...please forgive me...I...I can't...I can't be without you..."

The Doctors came in frequently to check on her...Asking Arnav if he needed anything...

All Arnav needed was Khushi..."I just need her to wake up...I just need her..."

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