SS/FF - With Or Without You - chp 38/pg144 - Page 5

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Jyo. thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#41
Vrush! I know I have a reserved spot but can I just comment here altogether? :P I simply adore your FF to bits! :) The best part is the nok-jhok between ArHi! Portrayed perfectly! :) Loving their banter! Have they met before? :S :S And jeez, Arnav is quite rude! Oh well, that's typical ASR right? :P I am looking forward to the next update.. Another ArHi encounter coming up? Would love to see some! :D

Continue soon

Jyotika
🤗
-RushTrip- thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#42
@nagz...
thanks...but somehow i feel..as it is not my imagination...in terms of characterisation, i am not sure..if i should work on this one...this then becomes like my wishful... where we cook up scenes rather than..a story...itself..

i am still iffy about it...pls..help!!

@jo..

yaar comment where you like...i am happy to have comments...

and thanks so much...i know you are a writer too..so happy to have someone...who writes..critique my work...

yep...my version is suppose is not going to be restricted to eye locks...

ask nagz!!
adits7 thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#43
w8in fr continuation...😳
-RushTrip- thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#44
Yeah i am working on it...

was busy!!

will try and do it today dits!!
lovetheserial thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#45
RUSH-TRIP
(CHAPTER 1)

Darling Vru, when I address you as above, "fading clouds revealing the ulitmate magic potion, faint mist revealing wild orchids, and a druid that was once worshipped for its innate ability to intellectual elements"; these run thru' my mind... Hey, u r always vamooshing by...like the ultimate invisible footsteps in the sand.

You have started off with the 3 vital ingredients for a winning story Vru.
(1) Kushi's ability to buy & sell the best with the right token of words and a smile. This helps her to set long-term goals and so will the story continue long-term...😊
(2) Her passion versus her family business for generations - which gives her the ability to think logically and stand on her own feet at any cost with no sign of helplessness. A platform for constructing her dreams with quiet ease...😊
(3) Her firebrand personality which would add fire and passion in anything she speaks or acts. Any man would eventually find a challenge in this personality and and add the much needed spice to turn on the romance..😍
Reading on, darling... Cheers.

Edited by lovetheserial - 13 years ago
-RushTrip- thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#46
hey Al,

thanks...for being such a faithful!!
lovetheserial thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#47
RUSH-TRIP (I love the feel of that PACE b'tween the RUSH & THE TRIP 😛)
(CHAPTER 2)
Now Vru, this is what I would call "sweet MarieLou" kinda music to my ears with fabulously recycled M&B. At the cost of sounding boastful for you my friend, the air in and around this story you've penned belongs to my genre. I can feel blindly the in-secure surroundings you are rhythmically exploring since Kushi is going to burst its seam for a new beginning, a frivolous and wild love that is going to settle like little sparkles of shiny sand with warm bearings in her heart. I can read through your mind and your lines and see the gradual aggressive romance hitting the stands, so to speak, rather unsettling Arnav.

I like the true excellence with which you brush your absolute authority and stroke with Kushi & Payal's tete-e-tete and taunting's at home in the warmth of their maika, a sneak peek into their comforting humble beginings, to the determination in Kushi to render services to her family thru the passion of chikan she has held close to her heart and making it work resourcefully to earn her wages and the final call as of an unbroken chord from eons or by a karmic past to stand before a future indulgence with Arnav that would throw her heart to skip a beat many a times ' that's your M&B style. Love it.

Reading on darling'.. Cheers Vru.

Edited by lovetheserial - 13 years ago
Hot_Indo_Chilly thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#48
Just caught up with the FF. Really nice. Howeve, had a question; Will Khushi always be getting monetary losses when she meets the mystery man.
-RushTrip- thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#49

Originally posted by: Hot_Indo_Chilly

Just caught up with the FF. Really nice. Howeve, had a question; Will Khushi always be getting monetary losses when she meets the mystery man.



no

its like this..small loss will lead to windfall gains?
--Magnificent-- thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#50
Res😊


Vrushy ...tuney kaha aur main start kar diya ...😃 me liking it and the characters are growing on me ...Arnie and Khushi seems straight out of M&B and me a sucker for M&B 😃 will read ahead and get back to u ...
Edited by Jes75 - 13 years ago

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