Napolean looked at his sister, he had brought chocolates for her today. He remembered how she always used to love chocolates. He did not cry, he had never cried once since that day and he had promised himself he never would until he punished Siddhant.
Siddhant Modi, he thought as he smiled. He smiled because he knew what lay ahead, and even the idea of Siddhant's suffering filled him with pleasure. Napolean was going to kill everyone Siddhant loved. Napolean had been with Siddhant for three years know, and there were only two things about which he was emotional; The company, and his fiancee. At first, Napolean had thought Siddhant loved his brother too, but soon he realised that it was a pretense and he was happy about that. He did not want to kill Armaan, he liked Armaan. He crossed out todays's date from the calender hung in Zubaida's room. Only five more dates were left, and each date had a goal. He gently kissed Zubaida on her forehead and walked out.
Today's date read: Riddhima's death.
Siddhant walked towards the room in a hurry; he was desperate. Magerrita had been haunting him since yesterday night. He just had to get her. Siddhant was a tall man, well built and had black eyes, which were empty. His eyes never betrayed him, he was a hard man to understand. He never got emotional, and that was not his fault. He had seen nothing but pain in his life, recognised nothing but hatred. The only jolly memories he had were those of his father and their family when he had been alive. But he loved his father, not Mr.Mallik.
Sunil Mallik, even the name set him boiling with hatred. This was the man who had killed his father because he had been in love with his mother. He remembered the day often, to rejuvenate his hatred.
His father had just died, he had been devastated. He had been sitting beside the fountain in the gardens of the Mallik mansion. His eyes reflected nothing but pain, he tried to convince himself his father was dead but he just couldnt bring his heart to believe it. He loved his father beyond what words could express. He felt empty, he felt betrayed. His most prized possession had been stolen from him. He hated God, he hated his mother for not even crying at her husband's death and marrying a monster immediately after her husband's death. What had he done to deserve this? He was five years old, and he was unusually bright for his age. All his teachers praised him. He was good at sports. He did everything he could to please his parents. He had had a perfect life.
In that killing silence, he felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned around, only to rest his eyes on his new father.
"Hello Son", there was a coldness in his eyes.
Siddhant did not answer, he was probably here to console him.
"Your father is dead", his tone was still the same. Cold. And Bitter.
Siddhant still did not answer.
"He is dead, and you are not getting him back. And I am not your father, I assure you that my wife will not be your mother from now on. You are not required here, I could as well just throw you out, but unfortunately Ananya loves you. But not for long. For the time that you are here, I want to tell you that this house is not yours. Keep your filthy hands away from everthing here, understand?"
By now, Siddhant had tears in his eyes. He felt so lonely, and humiliated.
"Another thing, I want you to hate me, you little piece of filth because that is exactly how I feel about you."
Siddhant did not need the advice, he already hated him.
Sunil turned to walk away, but then stopped, "If you say a word about our conversation to anyone, I'll shoot you. The way I shot your father."
The five year old innocent boy was dead. A new Siddhant watched him walk away, a new Siddhant who only knew how to hate. An emotionless Siddhant, a cruel Siddhant.
Five years later, on the same date, Sunil was found dead in his room. He had been shot.
Magerrita was on the streets, she was running, and car was following her. She was full of sweat, strands of her curls covering her face. She was wearing a thin nightgown, and she was on the receiving end of many inviting glances, but she did not care. She was running for her life.
Men, who were five times her age, had made love to her the entire night. Done all kinds of things with her. One of them had even beaten her up. She had not responded to anything. She just lay there, like a corpse. In the morning, when everyone had left, she felt revolted with herself. And with every man on the Earth. Without thinking of what she was doing, or what the repurcussions would be if she were caught, she just ran away. All she thought of was her escape. Her mistake, she should have thought of how predictable her action was and how Siddhant must have hired guards to prevent that. Running in the crowded market, she thought of nothing but her mistake.
"Riddhima, whats wrong", Armaan asked her. It was early in the morning, Riddhima had insisted that they first visit the beach. The beach was as beautiful as ever, the Sun was however, hiding behind the clouds, as though afraid to face this young lady who had taken a dislike for him. Riddhima had been sitting there for the past five minutes, with her eyes closed, answering Armaan in mono-syllabulles. Since the time Siddhant had left they had not exchanged much, but both felt something new and niether could explain what made them so comfortable with each othe, what made them know what the other was thinking, what set their heart on fire. All through the drive to the beach, Riddhima had just looked out of the window. Armaan knew something occupied her thoughts but he also knew that he occupied her heart and he was determined to have her talk to him. He knew this was love from the time he had set his eyes on her, and he knew that because he had been waiting for his love all his life. He had always been deprived of love, but he believed in God. Miserable things had happened to him, but he believed in God and therefore, he believed in love.
The two of them were sitting close to each other, and their was an unexplainable peace which filled them It did not feel awkward or out of place, it was as though they belonged there. With each other.
Riddhima sat next to Armaan, feeling the Sun, feeling the wind, feeling the waves, feeling the peace and feeling Armaan. She had not spoken to him much but she knew it was there, something, something that could not be separated from her, and something that Armaan had possessed.
Whats wrong with you Riddhima, this is the deamon's brother. He has the same blood as that devil. You are supposed to hate him, not fall for him. She jolted out of her thoughtsas she thought so, was she falling for him? Her heart skipped a beat as she contemplated the very idea.She could not possibly fall for him, his brother had destroyed her heart, all her emotions. She had left her job as an editor, ecause she had felt that the only aim of her life now was to kill Siddhant, to take her revenge, was her aim now a question? It could not be. She had to stop herself. She had to keep a check on her emotions.
She had a choice, whether to fall in love and forget whatever had happened, or to carry on with her plan, to destroy Siddhant. She went through whatever had happened in the last six months, and she made her choice.
What she did not realise was her choice did not matter, because she did not have one. Her heart had already made its decision.
"Whats wrong Riddhima?", Armaan asked her.
She kept silent for a second, then without opening her eyes, she answered, "What makes you think that something is wrong? Life is as good as it can get..." Riddhima did not open her eyes because she knew she could not trust them any longer. They had suddenly changed their alliance; they were narrating the wordless story of her life and his eyes understood everything. Everything.
Armaan knew she was lying, but he did not want to push her, "The waves are beautiful, aint they?" He said, looking at the waves.
"They have their own charm, their own shades and their own story; just like everything else. We all have a story, dont we?", Riddhima said, without opening her eyes again. She could feel the waves, she did not have to look at them and talk about them.
"Yes, but everything's and forgive me, but everyone's story is unique, isnt it? The waves have their own, unique story too. Their uniqueness is in their shades, in their communication. The waves dont have to change on anything's accord. They are for themselves. And only for themselves. They have a variety in their lives, they change." He said sadly, as he thought again of his own life.
Riddhima sensed the misery his words reflected, and she couldnt hold back her heart at this, she opened her eyes. She looked at Armaan, and on an instinct kept her hand on his shoulder, "Yes Armaan they have shades, but shades of one colour. They do what they have been doing for centuries, there is change, but not in them, in their nature. Maybe your life does not have shades but as long as the story of your life is coloured with bright rainbows, it is a beautiful story.."
"What is your story Riddhima?", Armaan looked at her and asked her.
She did not answer for a long time; they just kept looking at each other, "I'm like the waves, my life may have shades, moments of indecision, but it has chosen its colour."
"And what colour is that?", Armaan whispered.
Riddhima did not answer.
Did she have a story any longer? Was she still a normal human, who could love, who could care, who could feel? She had died with her sister, the ambition in her had died, the love in her had died, and only hatred had remained. But she did feel something in her heart when he looked at her didnt she, she felt something within her when he spoke to her, and her soul did feel something when he accidentally touched her... He was a deep man, deep as the ocean, as charis matic as the ocean, and as graceful as the ocean...But she was not supposed to think about him this way, was she? wasnt she betraying her sister? Her mother? Her father? Wasnt she betraying the promise she had made to herself and to each one of them? Wasnt this wrong? But then.. she did have a right to love, to be loved, didnt she? Thinking of all this she did not realise that she had caught hold of Armaan's hand and was clutching it tighter by the minute.
Armaan was mesmerised again, and now he was sure as ever that he was going to get Riddhima. It was not upto him, this was destined to be, and he could feel it. This was nothing he could do anything about...the peace he felt with her was no where else, it existed within their little bubble only... Yes, Siddhant was his brother, and he felt guilty about falling in love with his fiancee but this was natural..natural as the Sun's shine, as the Moon's glow, as the sea's depth. He did not care, not care about what happened next...It was for God to decide..He did not know what his future would be, how it would be, but Riddhima would definitely be a part of it. She was his, and only hiis. Without thinking about what he was doing, he placed his other hand on her cheek and rubbed it gently. She opened her eyes, and looked at him. He kept looking at her trying to decipher what her eyes told him. It was late in the morning, and the beach was unusually empty. The wind was ferocious and the waves had turned wild. The rain was on its way, but niether of them noticed anything, both of them were busy dealing with the storm that rose within themselves and the thunder of his touch that set both their hearts beating rapidly. Finally giving up on the eyes, he asked her again, "Whats your story Riddhima?"
Riddhima could feel colour in her cheeks, and this was definitely something she had felt after a long time. Was she actually blushing? Armaan touched her, looked at her, asked her as though he possessed her. It was apparent that he did... She was in love with him... She came back to the Earth when she thought so and she tore her gaze away from his, afraid by the intensity she felt.
Why was God doing this to her? He had given her a family, then taken it away from her. He had given her an ambition, then taken it away from her. He had then given her an aim, a goal, and now he was taking it away from her... Why was God torturung her?
"I told you Armaan, I dont have one.", she got up to leave but he held her forearm, as she tried walking away. As soon as he did that, the much awaited rain blessed the beach.
Riddhima did not protest, she wanted to, but she couldnt. Her heart did not allow her to. Without her permission, her heart had already given all its rights to him.
Armaan got up too and started drawing close to her, asking for the third time, "Whats your story Riddhima?"
She did not look up, their faces were inches apart and it was cold, the rain was untamed and rough. "I dont have one..", she whispered, a shiver running down her spine, it was a combination of the cold, the proximity and her raw emotions.
Armaan noticed her shiver, and he hugged her. Mostly because he wanted to warm her, and partly because he wanted to make it official. She did not push him away.
Riddhima felt the a warmth spread through her as he hugged her, it was not just physical, it was warming her hard, cold heart. All she could feel was that warmth, it was a warmth that his heart radiated, a warmth that her heart wasted no time in absorbing. There embrace was a silent song, a silent dance, a silent talk. It was silent, and that was because words and gestures were not required, both understood what the other felt. This relationship, or rather, the bond which had formed between them was different. It was not about hate, jealousy, attraction, smiles... It was just about love. Riddhima felt at peace, and this was after a long time, a very long time. Her heart had forgotten the meaning of feelings, and here he was reminding her of everything. Reminding her that she had a heart, that sometimes even she needed to be protected, that she was capable of loving, that she was beautiful, that love existed. She could not push him away, but she had made her choice... Love, yes she could love, but she could not betray herself, she could not betray the meaning her life had taken. She could not betray her aim, and her aim was to kill Siddhant Modi. She gently tried pushing him away but to no avail.
Armaan was adamant, he was not leaving Riddhima. He did not know what held her back, what bothered her, what was it which stopped her from loving him, because it did not matter. All that mattered was Riddhima and Armaan, and their love. He held her tighter, as she tried pushing him away. He could feel her softness, and it was not just her body, it was her soul. He could feel her soul, and her soul was soft, and gentle.
But Riddhima could not allow this, so fast , she had to do something before it got too late,"What the hell do you think you are doing?", she shouted. She was in her senses and this was so not happening. She could not afford to fall in love with a man she was to hate. The sole purpose of her existence was revenge and she could not let trivial issues as love affect her decision.
Armaan looked right into her eyes, he was sure about thi, "I love you Riddhima", said Armaan huskily and held her tighter.
Riddhima looked away, "Are you crazy..you..you barely even know me. Go have yourself checked. Besides, I am getting married to your brother. I am out of bounds, only to remind you.."
"Well, darling love recognizes no boundaries or limits. And we both cannot deny that something binds us together. Speaking of my love, I have never been more sure about anything in life Riddhima, I have waited to be loved all my life. All my life, sounds hard doesnt it? Its harder when you have to live through it and I have been doing exactly that for as long as I can remember. my mom died giving birth to me, my dad was a wonderful person, a great businessman, everything, but he never had time for me... never. And when I did fall in love with something, it did not work out. No, It did not. I fell in love with art, I fell in love with colours, I fell in love with canvas and easel, but it betrayed me too. Ionna rejected my paintings, my life has never ben about what I wanted, and I dont know what is holding you back, and I know something is there, but I am not gonna let you go too."
Riddhima smiled, "You think your life is difficult Armaan. These are mere problems, problems that exist in everyone's life. You are no different, you think your life is hard? Hard because some painting institute rejected your paintings? Hard because your dad was a businessman? Hard because you never fell in love.. That's not what hard is Armaan, destiny can be very cruel Armaan, very cruel and it hasn't shown you its worst colour. No it hasn't.. And you cant fall in love with me of all people in this world, understand? You just cannot, I don't have a heart. Somebody killed it. I have no love to give you Armaan, so don't even think about it."
She pushed him hard and tried walking away but Armaan was as determined as ever, he again held her forearm. By now, both of them were drenched in water, he came nearer, and whispered, "If there is no love in your heart, then why do your eyes speak otherwise, if there is no love in your heart then why does your heart beat erratically when I am near you, if there is no love in your heart Riddima then why cant you look away when I hold your gaze? Isnt that what love is all about Riddhima, there is love in your heart, And its only for me, I don't care about anything. Nothing, forget about what has happened in the past, forget about Siddhant, you guys are not meant to be, forget about everything. I will never ask you any questions, just take my hand and we will go off somewhere far. Somewhere where the ghosts of our pasts will not come to haunt us, where we can be alone, with the moon and the stars, just us."
She looked at the hand. She couldn't, she couldn't do this to her sister, her mother, her father, her broken dreams, her promise, and most of all Siddhant-she had to punish him for his deeds, she calmly looked into his eyes and adapted the expressionless, impassive face she had mastered in the past few years, "I love your brother Armaan, with my heart and soul, we are engaged to be married. You are reading too much into nothing. There can be no us, and Siddhant and I are meant to be. He deserves only what I can give him."
It stopped raining.
...
Siddhant sat behind his desk, thinking. He was frustrated, he wanted Maggerita but he knew that right now, the only thing she deserved was a punishment. He thought of various ways of punishing her; he could keep her without clothes in one of his freezing boxes, he could have her caned with hot iron, he could leave her in a room full of snakes, he could have her eat insects alive.. but he wanted to do something severe.. Something that would leave an impression on her mind.
The deadly silence encouraging his thoughts was broken by a knock on the door.
"Come in", said Siddhant shortly, he had been expecting Rick.
"Hello, Mr.Modi", said a tall, well-built man. Rick was an artist; he painted, he wrote, he cooked, he acted, and he murdered. The last was his area of expertise.
The earliest memories Rick had were those of his family. It had been his father, mother and elder brother. He had loved only his mother. But both his mother and father had loved his elder brother more. Initially, Rick had been very bitter towards his brother, but he slowly learnt to live with it. at the age of eight, he first fell in love.It was a senior girl, even she seemed to like him, she smiled at him alot and even agreed to date him once. Rick had been on top of the world. One day, while returning from the school, he caught a glimpse of his brother and the girl walking hand in hand. Rick followed them. His brother lead her towards the bushes.. Rick watched them make love. He felt betrayed and jealous, first his mother and now his love.. That night, Rick's brother was stabbed in his vertebral column while asleep. He never woke up.
Nobody suspected his innocent, meek, eight year old brother. Rick felt bad, not because he had stabbed his brother to death but because he had done it like a cheap, third grade criminal-without any style. That day, he discovered his passion.
Siddhant studied the eighteen year old boy in front of him. He was handsome, intelligent, mature, and good for the work he wanted him to do, Siddhant concluded.
"I want to have someone killed", said Siddhant slowly, "do you think you can manage?"
Rick looked at him coldly, what kind of a f**king question was that?
He nodded.
Siddhant took out his purse and extracted a photograph, "Do you think you can manage?", asked Siddhant again, giving him the photograph.
Rick sat on his seat; shocked, confused, and bewildered. He shifted his gaze back to Siddhant, "you sure", he asked uncertainly.
Siddhant repeated his question again, "do you think you can manage?"
Rick gulped, "you want me to do it now?"
"No. Later. I'll inform you.", said Siddhant Modi as he got up to leave.
Rick sat in Siddhant's cabin for half an hour after he had left, looking at the photograph.
The photograph was of Siddhant Modi.
Napolean looked at his watch, she'd be dead in two minutes. Exactly two minutes. Riddhima and Siddhant were going to meet at Emeralds' , one of the most famous restaurants of the world at six. He was in his car, outside the building, waiting with the patience of a vulture. He wiped the screen of his mobile with his thumb, waiting for it to ring. He had an excellent plan, which wouldn't, couldn't backfire. He had seen Armaan drop Riddhima to the building. She would go straight upto the second floor using elevator no.5. An elevator which was going to, accidently, break and Riddhima would die, accidently, of course.
He felt his phone vibrate.
"Done", was all the man on the other line said, before hanging up.
Napolean smiled, he was going to inform Siddhant himself.
Cricket
Anupamaa
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