SS charisma-updated---prt 8 pg 19 - Page 10

Originally posted by: Tomiko

thanx Nabz..=)

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Geet Dev Team

He told me clearly enough that I would never see him again, so I wait for nothing, knowing full well that I am waiting for nothing. But somehow I cannot help but wait. I dream of him : passionate, longing dreams, that wake me in the darkness, twisted up in the sheet, sweaty with desire. My father asks me why I am not eating. Deip shakes his head at me in mocking sorrow.

My mothers snaps up: ' she will eat.'

My sisters whisper to ask me if I am pinning for the handsome king, and I say sharply, ' there would be little point in that.'

I wait for another seven nights and another seven days, like a maiden in tower in a fairly tale.

My mother gives me a ring shaped like a miniature gold crown and adds ' take it dear, it is a blessing in disguise,' I look at my mother unable to read her thoughts. I look at the ring and place it on my palm where he left his kiss. I slip it on my right hand, I attempt no misfortune by putting it on my left. I smile at her thankfully and we both walk towards home. This is our routine.

Reaching home, there without warning, is a horse at the door. The man is talking to my father. ' tell his grace I shall be honoured. I will be there day after tomorrow.

The man bows in the saddle, wheels his horse and rides away.

'what is it?' I ask.

'we are all to go to war again,' he says grimly.

'not you!' I say in fear. 'not you. Not again.'

'no. the king commands me to provide ten men to march under his command. We are to change sides. That was an expensive dinner as it turned out.'

There is silence.

'did he say anything else?'

'this is a muster' my father says irritably. ' of course he didn't say anything except that they would be coming through the morning, the day after tomorrow.

My mother suggests at breakfast that my sisters and I, might like to watch the army go by. 'it looks well to show our support.' For once we think that our father will argue however, he laughs, ' god bless you, my spell binder,' he says unwillingly. 'you are right' she leans and kisses him on the cheek.

For the rest of the day, my sisters and cousins are in a frenzy, trying on clothes, washing their hair, exchanging ribbons and rehearsing their curtseys. My sisters are squealing with excitement. The king and the lords will go by, what an opportunity to make an impression on the men who will be the new masters of the country!

'what will you wear?' my sister Sasha asks me, seeing me aloof from the excitement.

' I shall wear my grey gown, and my grey veil.'

'that's not your best, its only what you wear on Sundays. Why wouldn't you wear your blue?'

I shrug. ' I am going since mother wants us to go,' I say. ' I don't expect anyone to look twice at us.' I take the dress from the cupboard and shake it out. It is slim cut with a little half train at the back. I wear it with a girdle of grey falling over my waist. I don't say anything to Sasha, but I know it is a better fit than my blue gown.

'when the king himself came to dinner at your invitation?' she exclaims. 'why wouldn't he look twice at you? He looked well enough the first time. He must like you- he gave your land back, he came to dinner. He walked in the garden with you. Why wouldn't he come to the house again? Why wouldn't he favour you?'

'because between then and now, I got what I wanted and he did not.' I say crudely, tossing the dress aside. 'and it turns out he is not as generous as those kings in the ballads. The price for his kindness was high, too high for me.'

'he never wanted to have you?'she whispers, appalled.

'exactly'

'oh my god, geet, what did you say? What did you do?'

I said no. but it was not easy.

She is deliciously scandalized. ' did he try to force you?'

'not much. It doesn't matter,' I mumble. 'and its not as if I was anything to him but a girl on the roadside.'

'perhaps you shouldn't come tomorrow' she suggests ' if he offended you. You can tell mother that youre ill. Ill tell her, if you like.'

In the morning I am not so brave. A sleepless night and a piece of bread and beef for breakfast does not help my looks. I am pale as marble, and though Sasha rubs red ochre into my lips I still look drawn, a ghostly beauty. Among my brightly dressed sisters and cousins, I, in my grey gown and headdress, stand out like a novice in a nunnery. But when my mother sees me, she nods, pleased. ' you look like a lady,' she says. ' not like some peasant girl tricked out in her best to go to a fair.'

As a reproof this was not successful. The girls are so delighted to be allowed to the muster at all that they don't in the least mind being reproached for looking too bright. We walk together down the road to grafton and see before us, at the side of the highway, a dozen armed men with staves, one or two with cudgels: father's recruits. He gave them all a badge of white rose and reminded them that they had shifted sides and that they were in support of the new king of England. They raise a ragged cheer for my father and pull off their hats with appreciative smiles for my sisters and me, and their wives and children bob curtseys as we come towards them.

There is a burst of trumpets, and every head turns towards the noise. Around the corner a steady trot, come the kings colours and trumpeters, behind them the heralds, behind them the yeomen of his household, and in the middle of all this bellow and waving pennants there he is.

For a moment I feel as if I will faint, but my mother's hand is firm under my arm, and I steady myself. He raises his hand in signal for halt and the cavalcade comes to a standstill. It is like a small town on the move, ready to do harm.

King Maan swings down from his horse and goes to my father, who bows low, 'all we could muster, Im afraid, your grace. But sworn to your service,' my father says. 'and this to help your cause.'

My mother steps forward and offers the purse of gold. King maan takes it weighs it in his hands and then kisses her heartily on both the cheeks. ' you are generous,' he says. ' and I will not forget your support.'

His gaze goes past her to me, where I stand with my sisters and we all curtsey together. When I come up he is still looking at me and there is a moment when all the noise of the army and the horses and the men falling in freezes into silence, and it is as if there is only he and I alone in the whole world. Without thinking what I am doing, as if he has wordlessly called me, I take a step toward him, and then another, until I have walked past my father and mother and am face to face with him, so close that he might kiss me, if he wished.

'I cant sleep' he says so quietly that only I can hear. 'I cant sleep. I cant sleep. I cant sleep'

'nor I'

'you neither?'

'no'

'truly?'

'yes.'

He sighs a deep sigh as if he is relieved. ' is this love then?'

'I suppose so.'

'I cant eat.'

'no'

'I cant think of anything but you. I cant go on another moment like this, I cant ride out into battle like this. I am as foolish as a boy. I am mad for you, like a boy. I cannot be without you, I will not be without you. Whaever it costs me.'

I can feel the colour rising like heat in my cheeks, and for the first time in days I can feel myself smile.'I cant think of anything but you.' I whisper. ' nothing, I thought I was sick.'

The ring like a crown is heavy in my pocket, my headdress is pulling at my hair, but I stand without awareness, seeing nothing but him, feeling nothing but his warm breath on my cheek and scenting the smell of his horse, the leather of his saddle, and the smell of him: spices, rose, water, sweat.

'I am mad for you,' he says

I feel my smile turn up my lips as I look into his face at last.

'and I for you.' I say quietly. 'truly.'

'well then, marry me?'

'what?'

Marry me. There's nothing else for it.'

I give a nervous little laugh. ' you are joking with me.'

'I mean it. I think I will die if I don't have you. Will you marry me?'

'yes,' I breathe.

'tomorrow morning. I will ride in early. Marry me tomorrow morning at your little chapel. I will bring my chaplain, you bring your witnesses. Choose someone you can trust. It will have to be a secret for a while. Do you want to?'

'yes'

For the first time he smiles, a warm beam that spreads across his fair broad face. ; good god, I could take you in my arms right now,' he says.

'tomorrow,' I whisper.

'at nine in the morning,' he says.

He turns to my father.

'can we offer you some refreshment?,' my father asks, looking from my flushed face to the smiling king.

'no, but I will take supper with you tomorrow, if I may,' he says. ' I will be hunting nearby and I hope to have a good day.'

He bows to my mother and to me, he throws a salute to my sisters and cousins, and he swings up into his saddle.

'fall in' he says to the men. ' be true to me and I will be a good lord to you. I have never lost a battle and you will be safe with me. I will take you out to great plunder and bring you safe home again.'

It is exactly the right thing to say to them. At once they look more cheerful and shuffle to the rear of the line, and my sisters wave their white budding roses, the trumpeters sound and the whole army goes forward again. He nods at me, unsmiling, and I raise my hand in farewell.

'tomorrow,' I whisper as he goes.

_________

Precap: 'wife,' he says with quiet satisfaction. 'to bed.'

hmmmm pehle mujhe maaf kardo coz of giving such a short update last time...