||AR-OS|| With Venom In Our Hearts - Page 3

AWESOME!!!!!

To all my readers

pehle toh i didnt understand it!!!!!!!

but my i lubed it wen i understud it!!!!

Hey Nahida,
Firstly thanks for the PM. Secondly as others have already mentioned your work was well somewhat 'baffling'. I'm not sure if that is the right term to describe my initial thoughts upon reading this OS but that's the closest I can get (sorry I'm not much of a writer hence the lack of words in my vocabulary).
Like quite a few others, I did read it again to confirm my thoughts about the OS. And thankfully I was right.

Okay so the OS:
It's FILLED with metaphors and symbolism. Others have given quite a few examples of it hence I don't need to be redundant.
One of my favourite parts from the OS is how you described the setting. I really feel that describing the setting is an essential part in any work of fiction since it allows the reader to understand your thoughts in a much better manner. Without the setting, the story reduces to mere characters in some white box. Anyways that is enough of my diatribe on the setting.
I like the fact that this OS is very different in its content and meaning. I know you said it is not embedded in romance, but I was honestly a bit taken back when I first read it.
The title? Hmm why the 'our'? Am I missing something here? Isn't it only Armaan? Wasn't he the one who had been poisoning her without her knowing so? This can't be a reference to Riddhima. If it is, then I definitely did not understand your OS completely.
Can I criticize a little? I hope you don't mind me saying so, and this is only because you asked for my opinion, but I thought a few sentences were a bit short and quite 'simple'. I thought there were quite a few those instances and they seemed quite contrasting when compared with some of your other lengthier sentences.
Okay moving on there are some stereotypes here. The colour green, witch doctor, dreams, etc. Again it's quite symbolic but also quite stereotypical. It's not a bad thing, but it's just an observation I made. Actually on second thought, because your work is somewhat confusing to understand initially, these literary devices are a big help.
I loved how you ended it. I mean if nothing, then the last sentence surely tells the reader alot. Lol somehow though I have a tough time imagining Armaan with a Cheshire cat smile (esp. not in the current DMG track!).
I like the whole colour theme you had going on. I know you talked about sunlight but for me the colour theme was mostly green and a little gray.
I know this is an OS and sometimes those do leave some unanswered questions in the reader's mind. But I would like to know why was Armaan poisoning her? Lol if it was to take the revenge of the past few months, then atta boy! But I'm quite sure that's not it.

All in all, it is quite a good read, albeit a bit 'baffling'. A very good first attempt and if your intent was to cause your reader to do some hard thinking than you're successful. Do write more, but I'd like to see you write some romance as well. I want to see how you would present that.
Thanks for the pm, and I was right, your writing is quite 'mature' 😉
Also I realize this is a bit of a rant, but hey you asked for it!

Hey Nahida,
I had read this OS the day you updated but I was like did really Armaan kill Ridhima... I was a bit confused but now reading it again with calm mind I realized that what I thought at first was right.
No doubt the story is written brilliantly, all the thing fits in brilliantly only the fact that Armaan is an evil just was unbelievable for me.
I loved this piece of writing, though I wonder why he did kill her but I guess this story was just mean to be like this :D.
Keep it up the great work, thanks for the PM :)

Luv u<333
Kashish

it definitely took me a while to understand, obviouslt this is something so nw, fresh but all i can say is BRAVO!

Ok now, this OS was something totally out of the blue.
Because wen it comes to AR every1 knows its only mushy romance and all.
but.. this was def intriguing.
I mean no one can ever think of such a diff concept.
And portraying AR with such concept is no easy task.
What really attracted me was the title "With Venom In Our Hearts".
It was wonderful reading this OS.
Do lemme know if u come up with some more writing pieces, or if you already have some.

Cheers,
Oochita =)

I'll be back.. :)

Here I come...

Originally posted by: Phatty16

So, being completely honest, I was dazzled for a few seconds. That was the idea teehee..

First of all, your writing manner is pure brilliance. Your words, and vocabulary is vast; it was intriguing to read your whole plot. I was honestly confused as to what happened - I had to re-read it, and get a confirmation from Adu to know what happened. Knowing what's occurred, and knowing the subtle hints you gave; the whole plot was so intertwined with such a vast vocabulary, I was flabbergasted.
I adore the perspective you wrote this OS from. This whole OS was so different; It's a much different concept than the usual ones I've come across, and have written myself, but you made this so intriguing, and so brilliant, I couldn't stop reading. I came to the end, and was like, "Wait, what? It's done? How!" and I went back to re-read it, and fully understand the depth of the OS.

With no dialogues at all, and only detail, I must say - you pulled it off REALLY well!

The whole concept of murder was taken to such a point where you think, what just happened? With your vocabulary, and sense of imagination - the whole plot and scenario was so different, it came across as something completely NEW. The whole thing was just "WOW" I honestly don't know HOW to describe what I'm feeling after reading this. Seriously, not even kidding. It was so... so... intriguing! The overall impression I have, is it was pure brilliance! everything overall was written with such intensity, it gave off a very amazing impact.

Nonetheless, I must say - the whole OS, overall was portrayed with such elegance, it was shocking to know there was a hidden writer! You write beautifully, Nahida! <333

I'm truly wanting MUCH more from you. Truly written like a professional writer! Oh my that is a HUGE compliment Fatima, thank you so much!
I want more, MUCH more! Promise? YAY!

Originally posted by: nandinidev

*Reserved*

Naaaaaadz...!! 🤗