**A Lone Star** (AR) Part 2 12/6

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simran1285

@simran1285

Inactive

+ 5

Posted: 16 years ago

#21

very interesting loved the beginning and the concept, so different! Keep it up

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Samira

@mishti4maan

Voyager

Posted: 16 years ago

#22

sounds really gd. continue soon!

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maryam

@mar-

Voyager

Posted: 16 years ago

#23

woow grt start pls continue sooon

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Robin

@Robin_M

Rocker

Posted: 16 years ago

#24

awsome start!!!!! love the concept already, and looking forward to more! please continue soon!

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*tiny*

@*tiny*

Explorer

Posted: 16 years ago

#25

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

this sounds soooooo interesting...is this your first?? i cant believe it...you read like a total pro , girl!!

amazing description really...it just flows.

do continue asap...and plz pm me if u can?

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pickytg

@pickytg

Dazzler

Posted: 16 years ago

#26

reserved for comment replies..get bck to it in a bit!!!!! **edite**

Originally posted by: anitamalik
Nij!

Man, you have a thing going on with this! I LOVE it! The details were wonderful...Like seriously, im in awe with the way you described everything!

I'm so looking forward to this FF and wanting to know why Ridz is leaving and all...

Loving it Nij! I told you that you have a way with words! = D

-Anita

yayyyyy!!! thx for readin ani...and sooo happy u like it!! :) haha n i still dunno why shes leavin...but ill tell you wen i find out :D ..thx again anita :D!!!!!

Originally posted by: xarmaanx
heya very nice concept plz cont soon cos i wud luv to read the next part luv sonia

thx ax! glad u like it..updated and will do another soon!! :)
nijal

Originally posted by: ttimpy
this is seeming osm....................lkg fwd to reading more..........

grt!! thanx a ton!!
nijal

Originally posted by: Jodubai
Hi Missy,

Nice intro.....very well penned down, Ridz's ordeal to get out of the place, she called home for 4 years....do continue soon

thx jodubai..dunno yur nme :D..bt glad u like!!! Updated!!
~nijal

Originally posted by: saridena
hey
nice part yaar

update sooooooooooooon

if u can pm me plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

luv soumya

thx soumya...glad u like!!
updated =)
nijal

Originally posted by: jia..
Wohaaaa missy, this was some wonderful start!!! Uff u given me complex yaar :).

Fabulous Nij, i simply loved the simply, subtle nature in which u painted this picture, introducing Ridz, her ordeal getting out of the place, Mrs Puri's character was one brilliantly sketched. Way to go. Looking forward to more!!

JJ!!
u read it tooo!!! awww!!:D m *blushin* now!!!
yaayyy!! sooo glad u like!! i updated n its sooo borin lol!!
but but wil wait for tem comments...!and dnt go all nice on tem...u all shd temme watz bad abt it!!!

Originally posted by: Robin_M
awsome start!!!!! love the concept already, and looking forward to more! please continue soon!

thx a ton!! updated and will do again soon!! :)
nijal

Originally posted by: *tiny*
ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

this sounds soooooo interesting...is this your first?? i cant believe it...you read like a total pro , girl!!

amazing description really...it just flows.

do continue asap...and plz pm me if u can?

haha yehh had 2 parts for another IF bt nt continuin dt 1!! glad u lke tis one though!!
updated :D
nijal

Originally posted by: ashluvdmg
hiya missy(i dnt no ur name,so thot of calin u missy)
hope u dnt mind...

it ws reli gud one..

boring??it ws emotional n all bt stil it ws so wel ritn...

borin no wy..it ws a gr8 start..

luking 4rwd 2 ur parts

hope u cont soon

thx a ton 4 de pm

luv u lts

ashu

its nijal :)!!
u liked....am glad! i thot it was really borin ahah!!
but defin update soon..=)

Edited by missypatel - 16 years ago

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pickytg

@pickytg

Dazzler

Posted: 16 years ago

#27

Part 1z up....not much to my liking...hope it didnt mke u all sleep..lol!!

ummm cheers! :D

nij

Edited by missypatel - 16 years ago

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@spln

Inactive

+ 5

Posted: 16 years ago

#28

reserved

*back n so soon lolzzz*

oki...boring it was only in ur dreams missy!!!i was stcuk to the screen, well either um right ur wrong, or i just have bad taste...i have personal conviction to believe its the former!!!...

my take...gosh wen she jolted out of her dream , so did i from like a reverie opf this scene i pictured in my mind, u know like thos wooden log houses in hill stations which are rooms of hotels, the mantles and the grandfather clocks, the fireplaces....the old fading portraits on the walls, the mist on the windows...n then as they bturn to bantering rain drops...gosh the feel of it...even the rare cobwebs fit in so well that u never want them to be removed, coz the whole look isnt eeire but warm n comforting in a way...lets say...in wa y old denims are??? like the rugged ones faded n weathering out compared to a new stiff one outa the store even if its super fashinable....oki....dont blame me, its was ur part....n my memories of many such huts in my years of growing up, living ina city like chandugarh has had advantages more than i can ever imagine, one was the beauty of life every moment!!!...i almost relived so much of it...*sigh*

oki jolted out fo the scene a second time...personally nij, i dont even think i read much of the dialogue like reading each word of it, i cud almost hear the conversation i thot....the bond is a beauty already, n only just budding so to say....n yeh yeh yeh...the one thing i wud have jumped at had i not been in the daze...SHE AN RJ,....wohoooo....theres something abt that profession i adore....u better capture it well...i know if someone can u will...lovya for the part hun update soon!!!

ps: i had to leave an essay, um hardly much of a poet!!!😆😆

Edited by spln - 16 years ago

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Hina

@hinz

Moderator

+ 9

Posted: 16 years ago

#29

reserved

edited*

ok me back with my comments

given em all on the chat but me will post them again

dont know what made u think it was boring

yar like i said before ,u need to get used to taking the praise

it was such a brilliant part

right from 'pu' 's solitude to the name relation

loved the way u made them bond ,there was so much depth in the whole scene

the way she is independant and makes her decisions and all fab👏

now me thinking of the whole RJ story u gonna bring in

the dream was a killer yar,her pain was ouch

me lovin it! not her pain obv lolz

nij u awsome with words in verses i know

but after reading this part me so sure u will rock at fics too

your first one still waiting for an update on that,dunno if u gonna cont

but this one i cant wait to read more

i know u will cont this soon,have a feeling u will

gud luck wid the exam tom and give us an update straight after that

Edited by hinanaziri - 16 years ago

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Qwerty123rty

@Qwerty123rty

Inactive

+ 3

Posted: 16 years ago

#30

The part was perfect Nij. The way you described their emotions...especially Riddhima's emotions....it was done so beautifully and i could feel every moment of it. But its sad how she never got any love...and Mrs. Puri, she too is a sweetheart but her granddaughter, daughter not living with her...humph...thats so mean...but yeyyy!!! now Rima and pu will live togethor..haha....and she working as a RJ...WOW....

So ya i loved the part and it was done perfectly (i sound repetitive, i know...told ya will learn some new words soon)...you described the emotions very well and anyone who would read this would be able to feel all the emotions come alive and am still curious to know as to why Riddz leaving...you are taking this brilliantly and am loving it.

Looking forward to more.

Love ya

Kratz

Edited by krati.mehra - 16 years ago