share jokessss....!!:D...

its very easy to make ppls cry but very difficult 2 make dem lauGh so plz guys share ur jokes may be it make some one lauGh in sorrow or backup neone's spoiled mood...!!😊

Angry sikh :-Oye mein is duniya ko mita dunga - mita dunga- mita dunga. Another sikh standing besides said mein tujhe rubber nahi dunga. 😆

One train which was going peacefully on the rail-tracks suddenly deviated from the tracks and went to the fields nearby and then came back on the tracks. The passengers were horrified. On the next Railway station the driver was caught : He was found to be a Sardar . He was questioned . He explained that there was a man standing on the tracks and he was not moving from there even after lots of honks etc . Then authorities questioned : Sardarji are you mad! just to save the life of one person you put the lives of so many passengers in danger. You should have run over that person . Sardar said : Exactly, that is what I also decided, but this idiot started running towards the field when the train came very close.😛
😆😆😆

Once Zail singh was relaxing in a park. Some kids playing nearby decided to pull his leg. Walking up to him they asked him,

"Sir are you relaxing?" Zail singh replied, "No, I am Zail Singh!"

The kids started laughing wildly and ran off. This terribly confused Zail Singh and he decided to check it out. He walked up to a guy who was relaxing on a bench near him and asked,

"Are you relaxing?" The man replied, "Yes, why do you ask?"
Zail Singh answered with satisfaction, "Then those kids are probably looking for you!"😆

HEAVEN IS WHEN YOU HAVE

An American Salary

A British Home

Chinese Food

A Pakistani/Indian Wife .......agree gals?😆😆😆

HELL IS WHEN YOU HAVE

An American Wife

British Food

A Chinese Home

A Pakistani Salary😛

Difference between boys and girls while using ATM
(Bank's cash dispenser machines)

Boys:

1. Drive to the bank, park and go to the Cash Dispenser.
2. Insert card
3. Dial code and desired amount
4. Take the cash, the card and the slip

Girls:

1. Drive to the bank
2. Engine stalled
3. Check make-up in the mirror
4. Apply perfume
5. Manually check haircut
6. Park the car - failure
7. Park the car - failure
8. Park the car - Success
9. Search for the card in the handbag
10. Insert card, rejected by the machine
11. Throw phone card back in handbag,
12. Look for bank card.
13. Insert Card
14. Look for Secret Box (where secret code is written)in Handbag
15. Enter code
16. Study instructions for 2 minutes
17. #Cancel#
18. Re-enter code
19. #Cancel#
20. Call Boyfriend/husband to get correct the code
21. Enter desired amount
22. #Error#
23. Enter bigger amount
24. #Error#
25. Enter maximum amount
26. Cross fingers
27. Take cash
28. Go back to the car
29. Check make up in rear mirror
30. Look for keys in handbag
31. Start car
32. Drive 50 meters
33. STOP
34. Drive back to bank machine
35. Go out of the car
36. Take card and ticket back from machine
37. Go back to the car
38. Throw card on passenger seat
39. Throw slip on the floor
40. Check make up in rear mirror
41. Manually check haircut
42. Go into roundabout - wrong way
43. BRAKE
44. Go into roundabout - right way
45. Drive 5 kilometers
46. Remove hand brake
47. Call boyfriend/husband to tell how miserable she was because of HIM

😆

My kids love going to the Web, and they keep track of their passwords by writing them on Post-it notes.

I noticed their Disney password was "MickeyMinnieGoofyPluto," and asked why it was so long.

"Because," my son explained, "they say it has to have at least four characters." 😆 😆

Two Sardars were walking together...

Pehla: Oye marr gaye. Meri biwi aur meri premika ek saath aa rahi hain..

Dusra: Oye main bhi yahi bolne wala tha.... 😆 😛

Pehla Pagal : Ager tum batao kay is Box mein kia hai tu ye anday tumhara
aur ager tum ye bata du kay ye kitnay anday hain tu 5 kay 5 tumharay aur
ager tum ye bata dogay ye kis kay anday hain tu wo morgi bhi tumhari.
Dosra Pagal : Yaar koi hint tu du.. 😆 😛 😆

😆

ONE FINE DAY A GIRL PROPOSED TO A SARDAR AND SARDAR DENIED
SIMPLY SAYING THAT IN OUR FAMILY,
WE MARRY ONLY OUR RELATIVES..
MY MOM MARRIED MY DAD,
MY BROTHER MARRIED MY BHABHI ,
MY UNCLE MARRIED MY AUNT AND SO ON.
SO PLEASE EXCUSE ME !!!!!
😛

A sardar was very fond of sensational and detective novels,
but he always started reading from the middle.
A friend of his asked why he did so?"
It'z doubly interesting", said the Sardar. "TO start from the
middle keeps one curious not only about its conclusion but also about its beginning 😆 😆 😛

Teacher : Which is more important to us, the sun
or the moon?
Pupil: Moon...
Teacher : Why?
Pupil : The moon gives us light at night when we
need it but the sun gives us light only in the day
time when we don't need it 😆 😆

Two engineers from every nation were invited to the States for presenting their plan on making an underwater road from New York to London.
Two sardars joined in to present their plan too. among all the members the sardars gave the cheapest offer and they were then asked to present in their plans.

Bush: "how are you going to start your construction ?"
Sardar: " i will start digging from newyork and my partner will start from london"
Bush: "and what if u both dont meet in the centre, then? "
Sardar: "then u should be more happy "
Bush: "why?"
Sardar:" u will get two tunnels constructed for the price of one"
😆 😆

1. Any similarity between you and a human is purely coincidental!
2. Are you always so stupid or is today a special occasion?
3. As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?
4. I'd like to kick you in the teeth, but why should I improve your looks?
5. At least there's one thing good about your body. It isn't as ugly as your face!
6. Brains aren't everything. In fact, in your case they're nothing
7. Careful now, don't let your brains go to your head!
8. I like you. People say I've no taste, but I like you.
9. Did your parents ever ask you to run away from home?
10. If I had a face like yours. I'd sue my parents!
11. Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent!
12. Don't get insulted, but is your job devoted to spreading ignorance?
13. Keep talking; someday you'll say something intelligent!
14. Don't you love nature, despite what it did to you?
15. Don't think, it may sprain your brain!
16. Fellows like you don't grow from trees; they swing from them.
17. He has a mechanical mind. Too bad he forgot to wind it up this morning.
18. He has a mind like a steel trap-always closed!
19. You are a man of the world-and you know what sad shape the world is in.
20. He is always lost in thought-it's unfamiliar territory.
21. He is dark and handsome. When it's dark, he's handsome.
22. He is known as a miracle comic. if he's funny, it's a miracle!
23. He is listed in Who's Who as What's That?
24. He is living proof that man can live without a brain!
25. He is so short, when it rains he is always the last one to know.
26. He is the kind of a man that you would use as a blueprint to
build an idiot.
27. How come you're here? I thought the zoo is closed at night!

😆 😆 😆