OS: "Breaking a Moke Wall"
Gunjan heard the women gossiping behind her back.. Kinne wadde ghar wich byaah hoe wala tha kudi da.. kinne khush the sab iss ki sagayi wich.. Inne wadde ghar k sath rishta toot gaya hai.. Bichari kay naseeb hi kharab hai.. kaun munda karega is se shaadi ab.. Kinne dukh ki baat hai kudi k liye sagayi ka tootna..
Gunjan gripped a toy-airplane she was holding more tightly. Her eyes burnt with unshed tears but she pushed them back. She wasn't going to cry this time. She wasn't going to shed a single tear on these people who knew nothing about her inner battle, the reason behind her fake pretence of i-m-the-most-happy & happening- kudi- of-the-pind'. Ever since her childhood, she was living with this false charade and no one ever cared enough to find out the Real Gunjan' and her desires'.. except HIM...He always knew everything about her.. about her pretense.. about the Real Gunjan'.. These did scare her.. This was the reason why she wanted to run far away from this Pind, this people.. and specially from HIM..
Gunjan kept walking & combating with inner turmoil of thoughts until her leg hit with something hard. She stumbled backward. She was about to hit the ground when a familiar hand grabbed her hand and her waist in a firm hold. A second ticked by, Gunjan's misty eyes met with gentle eyes of HIM.. Ranvi..
Ranvi held her gaze for a moment and Gunjan noticed indisputable concern & inadvertent plea in those beautiful eyes.. a plea' that she failed to understand and that unnerved her. Another reason why she had included his name' in the list of people from whom she wanted to run far away from this pind.. and HIM... Her eyes started getting cloudy again.
On the other hand, Ranvi noticed gloominess in her eyes and he felt a familiar pang at his heart. With a great effort, he pulled away his gaze and steadied her on her feet.
"Gunjan, tu thik hai na? Kahin lagi to nahi??" He asked tenderly.
Gunjan's heart felt an innocent flutter at his concern but as her brain registered the voice, distressing memories of yesterday's episode came in full force. Her nerves were already scraped raw and she stiffened in anger. Clenching her hands tight in the fist, she started moving away from him.
Ranvi noticed her body turned stiff as she started walking past him. Impulsively, he grabbed her wrist & stopped her in her track.
"Gunjan, me tenu kuchh puchh raha hu.. Tu thik hai na?" Ranvi asked again.
"Ranvi, chhad mera hath." Gunjan made a feeble attempt freeing her hand from his firm hold.
"chhad danga.. Pehle tu menu das, tu thik hai na?" He asked more concernedly.
"Tenu ki fark penda hai mai thik hu ya nahi.. Tenu aur Veera ko to khush hona chahiye ki.."
Ranvi gave her a little jerk so that she was facing him, again.. She stopped in mid-sentence as she saw firm determination on his face.
"Bas Gunjan. Bas bohot ho gaya.. Ek gal sun meri.. Menu ye achhe se pata hai ki tu bhi yeh achhe se janti hai ki veera ne job hi kiya hai who teri bhalayi kay vaastey kiya hai.. Aur menu yeh bhi achhe se pata hai ki tu yeh gusse aur narazgi kay pichhe kya chhupane ki koshish kar rahi hai.." He spoke coldly. Gunjan stared at him in disbelief. He exhaled deeply and when he spoke again his tone of voice held softness, " Gunjan, tu yeh jo Canada Jane wale sapne' kay tootne ki baat kar rahi hai na wo bhi galt (Galat) hai. Woh sapna tera kabhi tha hi nahi, Gunjan.. Sach toh yeh hai ki yeh sapna teri biji ka tha.. jise tune apni majboori bana diya hai.. aur ab wohi sapna teri kamzori ba gaya hai.. Tuje thoda sa bhi andaza hai ki...ki...agar teri shadi us farebi munde de naal ho gayi hoti toh..." His throat chocked as his heart ached. He couldn't complete the last sentence..
Gunjan stared him fretfully. There was undeniable aching his voice. His jaw was stiff but his eyes held the shattering tenderness. Whatever he said, was a blatant truth. She comprehended that last night but she wasn't letting herself to believe it. She wanted to blame everyone and everything for her shattered future.. And here he was doing that again...Reading her not-so-transparent' soul.. He was trying again to re-instate the-real-Gunjan-and-her-real-persona' that she had buried behind a false pretense for a very long time. She wasn't going to let him do that to her. She doesn't want to be that Gunjan' ever again.
"Ranvi, tenu ki lagda hai ki tuje mere bareme sab pata hota hai.. Par ye na teri sabse waddi wali galat fehmi hai." Gunjan retorted furiously.
Ranvi was watching her closely as many emotions passed over her face. He was aware of her inner turmoil. He ignored her retort completely, "Gunjan, aur ek gal sun meri. Jab rona aaye na toh ro lena chahiye.. Kaajal bachane wastey aannsu ko chhupana nahi chahiye." He tried to crack a joke with a faint smile to lighten the situation.
"Roye mere dushman, Ranvi.. Aur pure pind nu yeh pata hai kay Gunjan kabhi bhi roti nahi hai." Gunjan's eyes flashed a fresh anger.
Impulsively, leaving her wrist, he raised his hands to her face. Gunjan blinked her eyes in confusion. Ranvi caught a lonely tear that escaped from the corner of her right eye, "Toh aey ki hai, Gunjan?" He spoke warmly. His eyes looked so distressed that she felt a strange twinge at her heart. With an intense effort she pulled away her eyes and Ranvi took a step away from her. He picked up the toy-airplane which had fallen on the ground from Gunjan's hand just few minutes ago. He restored it in Gunjan's hand. When he spoke again his voice held an undeniable aching, "Menu fark penda hai Gunjan.. Tere se judi baat se, tere sapno k tootne se menu fark penda hai.. Agar menu kuchh fark nahi penda hota, toh dil wich patthr rakh ki tenu apne se...iss pind se inne dur jane dene kay liye itni asani se raazi nahi ho jata." He opened his mouth to say something more but words stayed inside his mouth only. Swallowing those words back, he gave her a last tender look and left.
Gunjan stood rooted to her spot and stared his back.. She felt few bricks fell from the wall that she had built around her heart.. And there was no pain.. Infact it felt so good.. For the first time in her life she felt alive..
Bade Achhe Lagte Hain
Anupamaa
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