Honest thoughts. - Page 2

Originally posted by: Chashmish786

I started watching DTHHJ on Friday after watching the wedding promo on youtube. After coming to the forum in hopes of discussing and enjoying fun threads, I realized I was one of the very, very few who are actually loving the drama. I'm eagerly waiting for their marriage and looking forward to how things unfold. As the saying goes, "each to their own", while many are disappointed with rocky's behavior, some others are enjoying it. It's just a fiction if you want to take it seriously then focus on the only good things it teaches us and ignore the bad ones.

P.S Ansh might be a look alike of Ian or varun but he's his own person and dayumn he HOT...

I am not from India and grew up in what I guess you would term a western environment . Anyway I stumbled across Indian soap operas about two and a half years ago when I was studying in another country. I really don't like any sort of soap operas or reality shows .I am more into content driven dramas, mysteries and comedies on tv . I am accustomed to looking at what you might term Western tv shows I also love movies ( foreign films or Hollywood) with strong storylines and well developed characters . I really don't care for chick flicks including romantic movies though a classic like Casablanca is one of the few exceptions. Also a romantic subplot in a tv show or movie is fine as long as it is not the main plot. That is one of the main reasons I don't like many Bollywood movies which I consider foreign films. I am curious why so many of them have to be romantic movies and so over the top in terms of sentimentality.

I have only looked at a few indian soap operas and I view them mostly as comedy or they irritate me so much I have to stop looking at them. It is like an alternative universe that has no connection to the real word -so regressive over the top .I am fascinated by so many things including why it is always only a romantic story and mainly focusses on one couple. The female lead basically never drinks , is vegetarian , only wears Indian wear and is dressed up even to sleep and never parties. She always has to suffer and convince the male lead she loves him or make him realize he loves her or sacrifice for him or his family or endure abuse from him or his family. There is an obsession with getting people married as quickly as possible . There is nothing like dating. The female lead must live under the same roof with the male lead and his family- no house of their own , and if she had a job before she does not work anymore. By contrast the male lead is free to drink, party and dress in western wear as are the negative female characters. I find this to be sexist and also extremely judgmental. Just because someone drinks socially and in moderation , wears western clothes and goes to parties and clubs does not make them morally inferior to others. I do all these things but I have been brought up with strong values which I will not compromise. These are life style choices and do not reflect on your morality. Although in India I understand this may be done for religious or cultural reasons though this should never be used as an excuse to judge oppress or control others which unfortunately it sometimes is

Anyway I and many people I assume look at tv or movies to be entertained. Whether it is to make us laugh ,cry , inspire us, enlighten us educate us , cause our imaginations to soar or even disturb us. Basically to experience the spectrum of human emotion. Every genre does one or more of these things. While a documentary may educate us a comedy makes us laugh. The point is everyone has different tastes and there are shows to suit everyone . Short of some protections like ratings for shows or movies to indicate only those of a certain age should view them or the show has coarse language or sexual content that may offend some viewers and indicating what is not suitable for children, you are free to watch what you want or switch the channel

I don't understand why tv shows need to be morally correct. There is creativity and freedom of expression once it does not violate any laws and the purpose should be to portray the human experience in all its beauty as well as its sordidness There should be guidlines in place to protect children and warn those who might be offended and finally freedom of choice on the part of the viewer to view it or not . Lust sex obsession cheating adultery breakups abuse and forced marriages unfortunately happen in some parts the real world

Anyway instead of being morally outraged at what is being shown I would say the story is so badly written it really does come across as cringe worthy unrealistic and blatantly tries to manipulate the audience's emotions in the name of drama What is disturbing is why so many indian soap operas need to show such disturbing violence against women time and time again and justify it with some superficial reason like the character had a bad childhood and then to add insult to injury eventually make the abuser and the victim fall in love The victim being female has to endure and sacrifice though she may fight back a bit and then redeem the male lead I mean one or two of these shows with a strong backstory like the abuser is a psychopath has control anger issues is a misogynist in the larger context of a show about physical and other forms of violence is okay but to show this time and time again in multiple shows with some flimsy backstory and say that is a love story is really twisted and not how most love stories exist in the real world

Someone in another forum mentioned a turkish drama where the wife was in love with a man other than her husband and was having an extra marital affair I also saw the finite indian soap Aade Adhoori ( not sure of the spelling) where a woman developed a relationship with her brother in law while her husband was away.Both shows were so well written and the actors portrayed the complexity of emotions with such subtlety that these show were well received even though they were not morally acceptable. On western tv there is a show with Gyweneth Paltrow where is is abused by her husband It has once many awards because it realistically portrays abuse control and manipulation It does not have a flimsy backstory justifying abuse purely for drama and as a segway into a love story That is an insult to real women who are victims of domestic violence .I don't think tv and movies need to be morally appropriate but barring some creative license , somewhat realistically portray all human emotions and experiences whether good or bad unless it is some sort of supernateral show etc which does not need to be realistic.

The argument that this is the culture in India or people take guidance from these shows does not seem valid. Clearly modern India has modern educated women who drink party work date have pre marital sex and like anywhere in the world people probably also cheat or break relations and even have purely sexual relationships and there is abuse . Also just because some people might be influenced by these shows does not mean it needs to be morally appropriate otherwise they would be corrupted. First of all children should not be looking at soap operas and teenagers and those older should be able to take responsibility for their own lives snd look to their family teachers spiritual leaders and use plain common sense to not be influenced by tv shows and movies and distinguish between reel and real Just because it is common that people are influenced by tv shows does not mean it is acceptable and the entertainment indistry should cater to this.

But at the same time all these shows can't show the same twisted stories all the time and call them love stories That is just plain bad manipulative writing and bad tv

People have the naive concept that fiction does not influence reality and that people do not romanticize violent and heinous behaviour. Let me tell you a real life example - there are women who write love letters to convicted criminals like Ted Bundy, there are women who romanticize psychopaths and this is not a behaviour to be encouraged or supported.

Rocky as a villain is by all means acceptable. He behaves exactly how a psychopath would behave and the actor does a good job of it. The only problem majority of us have is with him being forced into a marriage with Happy. This is an all too real scenario where women are being forced to marry their abusers and rapists and it's not acceptable.

If the story was to take a track where Happy would find her own foot-hold, take actions against Rocky or even as someone else mentioned if the show was to portray abuse and torture for what it is rather making Happy and Rocky fall in love (unless they are planning to portray Stockholm Syndrome, in which case again that's okay) , then it would be okay.

There men and women who take cues and lessons from books and movies. Apart from not so good romance novels , most books which depict abuse and violence do not glorify it. They show it for what it is. Indian television does not and Indian society is already riddled with problems without media adding to it.

Yes, he is similar to Ted Bundy - a psychopath but it is not ok to admire such monsters!

Originally posted by: Chashmish786

<font face="Times New Roman, Times, serif" size="3">I started watching DTHHJ on Friday after watching the wedding promo on youtube. After coming to the forum in hopes of discussing and enjoying fun threads, I realized I was one of the very, very few who are actually loving the drama. I'm eagerly waiting for their marriage and looking forward to how things unfold. As the saying goes, "each to their own", while many are disappointed with rocky's behavior, some others are enjoying it. It's just a fiction if you want to take it seriously then focus on the only good things it teaches us and ignore the bad ones.</font>

<font face="Times New Roman, Times, serif" size="3">P.S Ansh might be a look alike of Ian or varun but he's his own person and dayumn he HOT...</font>

you aren't one of the fews! I like them too. Here I only find negativities, that's why I have stopped coming here. When people know the leading pair that has been fixed prior to the serial being launched, then why to have expectations on changing the leads? There are many people who are loving the serial outside of this site. Moreover, I do agree that violence against any woman is outright horrible and shouldn't be ok. But talking about actors looks and how he shouldn't be the lead is equally degrading. The story has barely started. Characters need time to develop and so does the story. People should give them some space! I enjoy Happy and Rocky, excluding the violence part. Other than that, they are a normal couple who are meant to have twists and turns in their story.

Its a gul khan show . I didnt know . From the beginning , i was not interested in the story , it looked too boring and contrived to me . Rocky is this that and that but why ? There is no clear reason behind his extreme hatred towards happy . Except that she took a panga with him and she lied to the police about the accident . Thats how it started correct ? From whatever i saw , happy did nothing to invite this outrageous behavior from him . Why is he after her life ? Isnt everything happening too quick ? I dont like the actors too so in future no chance of liking them either . Why would rocky "marry" happy now ? He has already created havoc in her life without marriage . This is the most absurd of all reasonings. Everything is forced only to show an angry young man . He isnt imo . He is on a different level , n how does he get away with these gun trotting antics ? Are civilians allowed to carry guns like that ?this is how they create fear for the hero? All the more sick is the women of his house suppporting him and asking him to ruin happys life. But why? Bec chintu fell for her ?

Wait so let me get this straight because some people in Indian society who are adults will get influenced by a tv show depicting abuse violence or any kind of immoral behaviour there should be a censorship on such shows to protect them . Doesn't that tell you something is fundamentally wrong with the society and the mentality regressive narrow minded misognyistic thinking in the name of religion tradition and culture needs to change as opposed to coddling such mindsets Too repressive or conservative a culture often breeds extreme behaviour As I said I am not Indian When I was in law school in Canada some male Saudi exchange students were staying at the same residence as me for the summer They would blatantly stare at girls in sun dresses short skirts shorts etc Should we have changed what we wear to not titilate or influence them Of course not Complaints were discretely made and they were told in the west it is not appropriate to stare at women in this way . If they lived in a more multi cultural and diverse society may they would have learnt to act more appropriately growing up instead of sexualizing women who dressed this way and thinking they had no morals Likewise society needs to be educated about abuse etc from parents in schools ( sex ed classes) from spiritual leaders and maybe not so much segregation of the sexes so they are not repressed and treat each other nomally but it is not the entertainment industry's job to teach them this or to be censored to such a degree that they cannot show the full spectrum of human experiences because adults will think it is okay to abuse and stay in abuse relationships or do other morally reprehensible things The problem I have with show and most indian how is the romantiscism of abuse violence etc in almost all ahows There is no valid backstory and it is over the top and unrelalistic just for drama and people still lap it up

Originally posted by: contentdriven

Wait so let me get this straight because some people in Indian society who are adults will get influenced by a tv show depicting abuse violence or any kind of immoral behaviour there should be a censorship on such shows to protect them . Doesn't that tell you something is fundamentally wrong with the society and the mentality regressive narrow minded misognyistic thinking in the name of religion tradition and culture needs to change as opposed to coddling such mindsets Too repressive or conservative a culture often breeds extreme behaviour As I said I am not Indian When I was in law school in Canada some male Saudi exchange students were staying at the same residence as me for the summer They would blatantly stare at girls in sun dresses short skirts shorts etc Should we have changed what we wear to not titilate or influence them Of course not Complaints were discretely made and they were told in the west it is not appropriate to stare at women in this way . If they lived in a more multi cultural and diverse society may they would have learnt to act more appropriately growing up instead of sexualizing women who dressed this way and thinking they had no morals Likewise society needs to be educated about abuse etc from parents in schools ( sex ed classes) from spiritual leaders and maybe not so much segregation of the sexes so they are not repressed and treat each other nomally but it is not the entertainment industry's job to teach them this or to be censored to such a degree that they cannot show the full spectrum of human experiences because adults will think it is okay to abuse and stay in abuse relationships or do other morally reprehensible things The problem I have with show and most indian how is the romantiscism of abuse violence etc in almost all ahows There is no valid backstory and it is over the top and unrelalistic just for drama and people still lap it up

This was not meant to be an argument about east vs west . I am well aware India hs diverse religions such as Christian Judaism Islam Hinduism Sikhism and Jainism for example and various ethnicities like Hindus Muslims Jewish people Italians Chinese etc . The point is the major ethnicity is still people of India descent who are of one or two major religions . The people who give trps are the audience in India . International viewers do not count . I am curious as to why Indian tv producers and writers keep writing soap operas again and again with disturbing levels of violence again and again especial against women in the name of a love story and these shows gain Trps from the Indian audience Does that not tell you about the mindset of the audience GENERALLY . Everywhere in the world including the west has it's problems . Some problems are more prevalent than others within certain communities/ countries etc That is not denigrating the society or saying one us superior to another - that is just stating facts . For example among black americans in inner cities in the United States there are higher levels of gun violence than in the general population . Among the Sihk community in Vancouver there are higher than normal levels of domestic violence against women and drug use among male youth who feel marginalized and disenfranchised and activists within their own community are trying to addres this Only in the ladt few years in Saudi Arabia were women allowed to drive .Likewise recent human rights reports have placed India as one of the countries with the highest rate of violence against women so what is the issue ? Even in a place with diverse cultures how much deep interactions are there between cultures ? The point is some posters think shows which show morally reprehensible things including violence against women should be banned as some people would be influenced by it for example to continue to abuse or to stay in abusive relationships That is a deeper family society and institutional problem I don't think tv should cater to that Some shows can be educational inspirational promote social change but entertainment should show the full spectrum provided there is a strong backstory

You comment the show shows a bit of REALITY that boys are brought up showing that they can get away with lot's of things is perhaps the reality of the society that you live in but that is not the reality of the society I live in My brother male cousins male friends and acquaintances don't have this mindset The few people I have heard of that due were brought up in a culture that promotes that so again it comes back to that Some latino guys are still brought up in a machismo culture and some indian guys are still brought up favoured over female children It point is individuals , families of course may be different but there are some prevailing cultural norms traditions
that many precribe to and that needs to change