Originally posted by: ShinyMishka
I agree it's wrong to make children suffer because of a break up. However, if Abhay's memories are anything to go by Vinayak was very toxic as a father, and he doesn't seem to have changed much. It's easy to blame Girija for separating a father and son, but how hard did Vinayak try to maintain a relationship with Abhay? We have courts and laws... or he could've simply tried harder to convince Girija. He didn't care to see how his son was living? How can we even know the truth as Girija is not in a state to defend herself. I do appreciate that the show is showing that everyone is flawed, however, some people are not as much deserving of sympathy.
Hey you have raised valid points here and I would like to explain myself better so that you can see where I am coming from.
Firstly Vinayak is flawed - He is an entitled male child of our society, he's had an extra marital affair, not been very mature and responsible with his breakup which has suffered irreparable consequences. To your point, the FBs do show him to be a toxic parent, but that doesn't give Girija the clean chit - thats all I am saying. If Vinayak decided to stay with Girija, she would have allowed Abhay to endure that bad parenting. Thus my point that if she couldn't have Vinayak, she will let no one have him and this was her way of revenge and dealing with her hurt - which is wrong on any child! She prevented Abhay from having an equal chance with his other parents - thats what was proven from yesterday's episode bringing me to my next point....
Can we trust Vinayak - Maybe we shouldn't and i wouldn't if he wasn't my parent and if he didn't define a very integral part of my identity but for Abhay - he is! Abhay has all his life held a grudge against him for deserting him. There is a reason he calls him his "ex" father and not his mother's "ex" husband. Yesterday Abhay got to know that there is a possibility that the narrative he was fed for the last 18 years was flawed and all he did was acknowledge that maturely. And honestly what option does he have, he can never completely know the truth. Is he really expected to hold onto a grudge (which could be for wrong reasons) for the rest of his life? He isn't being all melodramatic and saying I love you dad and all and he isn't pissed off at his mum. All he is doing is letting go of a grudge he held all his life - its hard to hold onto grudges, especially against parents - its tiring and consuming. All he did was lighten his shoulders.
Why Vinayak didn't try harder - This could be for 2 reasons:
1) He believed he caused Girija enough remorse and didn't want to make her life more miserable. We all know who would have won if he went to court.
2) He was never emotionally attached to Abhay, he was merely his provider. Hence when it came to choosing between his love and his responsibility, he chose his love. Men in India are brought up to be providers, its the mother you cares for you emotionally. As previously said, Vinayak is a typical entitled male in our society. He wanting to provide for Abhay was his guilt of not doing his "role" as a father. He and Vikrant are honestly not every different. Many people on the forum believe that Vikrant wouldn't approach Deepika if he had a kid with Aditti - I disagree. Vikrant's problem is he never gave his marriage a genuine chance - hence when he came in contact with Deepika he has lost his marbles. When you just want one thing - you run after it to make it happen. Even if in the process you lose other things but I am sure Vikrant would equally be guilty if his child had to suffer the consequences of his actions.
Also as you grow older, you become the more sensitive version of yourself - you realize the gaps in your life and can have regrets. I have always wondered why everyone is talking about the "beta" transfer of legacy, why can't it be a girl? But that's Vinayak - he is archaic and believes in bloodline getting carried forward. He can't take failures but this his biggest failure - that he has a son and he can't really transfer his legacy. He understands this isn't a fair punishment but has accepted it...but that doesn't mean he can't get emotional seeing his son all grown up....becoming such a competitive surgeon ( a secret dream maybe!)
Lastly I am NOT sympathetic towards Vinayak but that doesn't mean I can't be objective and support him in his redemption story! I will do the same Vikrant has his :)
I know this is long....but I hope I have gotten closer to you hearing me :)
Cheers!