How do you handle it? - Page 2

Originally posted by: xobile

Very good topic Tulip!

I think the key cause of tension in such cases is not a lack of knowledge but a large ego. Most people are not experts on most things, but discussions are only enjoyable when more people join in. Problems arise when someone with an incomplete understanding of the subject is too arrogant to accept that he might be wrong. When you start prioritising your ego over the truth in this way, you have taken the debate too personally. Debating requires a certain degree of aloofness so as not to see a counterargument as a personal jab or a putdown.

When I fall into a discussion with someone who is not willing to have a reasoned debate, it is very frustrating because it seems like a waste of time and energy. The best solution is to be dishonest and agree with him or to try and change the topic.

Originally posted by: Simi_PagalLadki

Basically everyone already said about what I was gonna say!
Good luck with that Varsha! 😆

Originally posted by: return_to_hades

Two rules -
1) You cannot argue faith
2) Sometimes, Ignorance and stupidity cannot be cured

If someone has a strong perception about something, if they just don't know; it can be frustrating and even futile to debate.

Things that can be done are
- Ask questions to expose holes or chinks in their thought process. The ultimate goal is to get them to question themselves
- Introduce facts slowly one by one, make sure you just don't state something is a fact, but have a source preferably a source that your opponent would trust.

However, if people are stubborn or not open to those means. Simply set a distinction between arguing facts and arguing opinions - and remember there is no right and wrong in opinions. This does not need to be verbally established really, but firmly in your mind. You will have an easier time digesting someones warped opinions, knowing they are warped opinions. You will find it easier also to put in alternate perceptions and opinions.

If all else fails, just agree to disagree or smile and nod your head. There will always be some people who never lose an argument, no matter how wrong or irrational they are. Sometimes these people even win an argument over people who were on their side, supporting them. No point wasting your time.

Originally posted by: CZ..

I know how it feels. my family is full of such obnoxious uncles who have nothing better to do than to sit down with a cup of tea and whine about something irrelevant and make it look like a 'debate' 😆

I used to try to debate with them before but then I gradually realized that I could never win, so I simply gave up. now I just sit in the room and listen to them sprouting nonsense. recently, I was at my cousin's house and basically it was a huge get together in the evening. all my uncles got drunk and started talking about global warming. one of them claimed that global warming doesn't exist and it's a non-issue that the media is thriving upon.

basically, just laugh out loud and screw it? 😆

Originally posted by: tulipbaby53

Anyways, the purpose of my topic is: How do you debate with someone who doesn't know what they're talking about?

In essence, what i want to press on is-- don't let off people as being stupid too soon. Often ,in my opinion, when people say something which you are not accustomed to hearing or feel irrational, instead of responding with an argument , if you just ask them to "Tell me more about it" , you'll benefit more.

But that all is idealistic. You can make fun of them at times and chuckle to yourself(for them not understanding) if you have some evil humour in you.😆

Originally posted by: Mindbender

Don't debate with them if you 'think' that they are not worth it. Instead try to find out where they are coming from. It will be learning experience. You might learn that there is some emotional belief which is holding them from being rational or perhaps, they were right and your thinking was wrong.

In essence, what i want to press on is-- don't let off people as being stupid too soon. Often ,in my opinion, when people say something which you are not accustomed to hearing or feel irrational, instead of responding with an argument , if you just ask them to "Tell me more about it" , you'll benefit more.

But that all is idealistic. You can make fun of them at times and chuckle to yourself(for them not understanding) if you have some evil humour in you.😆

Originally posted by: Mindbender

Don't debate with them if you 'think' that they are not worth it. Instead try to find out where they are coming from. It will be learning experience. You might learn that there is some emotional belief which is holding them from being rational or perhaps, they were right and your thinking was wrong.

In essence, what i want to press on is-- don't let off people as being stupid too soon. Often ,in my opinion, when people say something which you are not accustomed to hearing or feel irrational, instead of responding with an argument , if you just ask them to "Tell me more about it" , you'll benefit more.

But that all is idealistic. You can make fun of them at times and chuckle to yourself(for them not understanding) if you have some evil humour in you.😆

Originally posted by: Summer3

Or perhaps if she were to put herself in their shoes she may see it better😆

But sometimes they may not be all wrong, but may have a small point.

So you can tell them "You do have a small point "😆

rather than "You talk rubbish"