Cheating is healthy for married couples - Page 5

Originally posted by: Steff_DMG

There have been cases where wives/husbands complain about such stuff,go ask them how they fantasize about others, I have no idea how such insane stuff come on their mind, Ok its insane to me but may be human to some😕 some fantasize about celebrities, mediocre, honestly !! 🤢

For me is simply unfortunate.

Originally posted by: return_to_hades

Yeah, I guess that's what is implied. I like to complicate matters as you know it.

As I said, to me cheating (both kinds) after marriage is wrong. Better end than cheat, according to me. I don't get people who want open marriages. Anyway, miya biwi ke beech, main kaun bolne waali. I'll worry about my relationships only.

How to realise when one is cheating when that person is emotionally involved with someone and has not gotten sexually involved? Indeed that proves that that person is actually loyal- he feels loved with another person yet has resisted the temptation ,to give due respect to marriage.

Actually, that brings another question to my mind- does marriage mean not involving with another person only sexually?

Originally posted by: *Woh Ajnabee*

Okay. Angelina ka dimaag abhi kharab hua hai ya pehle se kharab tha? Dimag kabhi tha bhi ke nahi? 😆

Kya Cloddy, lagta hai kuch zyaada hi strong breakfast karke aaye ho. Itni lambi posts and full debate waala mood? Aise kaise? 😆

😆 Just 1 paratha and makhan.😆

Originally posted by: clodpolish

😆 Just 1 paratha and makhan.😆

And how many calories was that? Are you sure you mom didn't mix something else in it as well? 😆

Originally posted by: clodpolish

How to realise when one is cheating when that person is emotionally involved with someone and has not gotten sexually involved? Indeed that proves that that person is actually loyal- he feels loved with another person yet has resisted the temptation ,to give due respect to marriage.

Actually, that brings another question to my mind- does marriage mean not involving with another person only sexually?

I think you can resist physical temptations, but how do you resist emotional ones? If you feel attached to someone else emotionally, but still continue your marriage with your partner, simply out of respect and loyalty, you are still only pretending that the love is there, when obviously it isn't. What is the point of that kind of marriage, then? Its unfair to both people.

Absolutely not - marriage, or rather commitment, means being involved with only one person physically and emotionally.

Originally posted by: clodpolish

How to realise when one is cheating when that person is emotionally involved with someone and has not gotten sexually involved? Indeed that proves that that person is actually loyal- he feels loved with another person yet has resisted the temptation ,to give due respect to marriage.

Actually, that brings another question to my mind- does marriage mean not involving with another person only sexually?

To me marriage means sexual and emotional fidelity. Just as one can experience lust and act on it, emotions are strong too and someone can fall in love outside marriage too. I think people are aware of their physical desires as well as their emotions and know - when the marriage has reached the stage when it needs to be ended.

Originally posted by: *Woh Ajnabee*

I think you can resist physical temptations, but how do you resist emotional ones? If you feel attached to someone else emotionally, but still continue your marriage with your partner, simply out of respect and loyalty, you are still only pretending that the love is there, when obviously it isn't. What is the point of that kind of marriage, then? Its unfair to both people.

Ok let's complicate it a bit- the other person loves the one who is emotionally bonded to someone else. And the one who is now emotionally bonded to someone else thought initially that she loves the person whom she/he is married to . Out of respect for all the commitments made at that time and also because of the fact that the partner loves him, she/he is continuing with the marriage.He/she also realises that ending the marriage would mean problems for the other person who hails from a culture where divorce is really looked down upon.

Absolutely not - marriage, or rather commitment, means being involved with only one person physically and emotionally.

How to stop yourself from being emotionally bonded with someone?Is emotional bonding =love?

Originally posted by: return_to_hades

To me marriage means sexual and emotional fidelity. Just as one can experience lust and act on it, emotions are strong too and someone can fall in love outside marriage too. I think people are aware of their physical desires as well as their emotions and know - when the marriage has reached the stage when it needs to be ended.

I like the way you never forget words like "to me","i feel"- you always are ready for other views. :)

Just a small question- is it not possible for one to be emotionally bonded to more than one person?

Originally posted by: clodpolish

How to stop yourself from being emotionally bonded with someone?Is emotional bonding =love?

Ok the blue part was too complicated for me.

There are many emotional bonds. Sometimes it is just friendship or simple affection. That is all fine. It is ok to have best friends outside marriage

However, there are times when the emotional bond is too deep to be simple friendship. There is an undercurrent of attraction. Even the emotional bonding on its own at an emotional level has an electrifying appeal. You fall in love outside marriage. You stop seeing your spouse with the same affection and compassion and emotionally crave for someone else. Slowly, the physical need to fulfill that emotion also creeps in.

I think with pure lust, one can sleep around and forget about it. The person was just a means for satisfaction. Falling in love outside marriage is a more challenging cross to bear. You simply are incapable of giving the marriage the love it needs.

Originally posted by: clodpolish

How to stop yourself from being emotionally bonded with someone?Is emotional bonding =love?

I think you are bringing in too many ifs and buts into the situation. If you are emotionally attached to someone else, or emotionally bonding with someone else, but continuing your marriage, then you are ultimately cheating on your partner. You continue the marriage because your partner loves you and because you care for him/her. But is it not unfair to your partner that you do not love them back the same way that they love you? What have they done wrong to get the lesser end of the bargain here?

Society may look down upon divorce, but that's a decision you have to make. Sometimes a married couple continues a marriage afraid of what society will say or how it will adversely effect their children, but that is their decision, a conscious decision. Here, one partner is totally clueless as to the other partner's dilemma.

Emotional bonding may not be love, but it definitely has the potential to eventually become love. When you fall in love with someone, I think the first step really is that you're emotionally attached to them. As to how you control yourself from being emotionally attached - well its like love, how do you stop yourself from falling in love? I think we're taking the meaning of emotional attachment too lightly here. Sexual infidelity doesn't take much time or effort (not my best wording here 😆), but emotional bonding has to occur over a time period. You have to get to know someone before you actually become attached to them in that way.