What's your take on men crying. Getting too soft?

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hindu4lyf

@hindu4lyf

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 15 years ago

#31

Originally posted by: Summer3

yes better to cry then be cruel.

Buy crying about the smallest things does not make sense. Even Federer cried in public when he lost . He can be disappointed yes, but there is no need to cry as the best man won. There will always be a chance to fight again.

I don't think it's right to comment on Federer crying in public like that. I mean c'mon it's not just about the best man winning. All those months of hard work go down the drain because when the actual time came, he wasn't able to perform as well. (Still a great show by Feddie though! =] )

Yes, he has a lot of other titles to his name too but hey, we're humans and humans have a tendency to be selfish.

I don't think one should be penalised for 'crying for the smallest of things' cos some are more emotional than others. Also, what is 'small' to you could be of huge importance to someone else.

Plus, like someone said, I like men who aren't afraid to express their emotions.😊

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hindu4lyf

@hindu4lyf

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 15 years ago

#32

Originally posted by: return_to_hades
To date, I have not met a single guy who did not cry at the end of Notebook. Personally, I love my boys to be a bit emo. It makes them edgy. No wonder I am in love with Gabe Saporta.

Haha the complete opposite of what I like for my boys to be like.

I stay away from emos as much as possible, they usually get on my last nerve!

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Summer3

@Summer3

Trailblazer

+ 2

Posted: 15 years ago

#33

Originally posted by: crazy_sunny

no wonder now we hav females pilots too 😆 Not all females R cry babies & not all men R macho. Some expres their feelings more readily than others. Crying helps to relieve stress.

Yes bring in the females, no wonder we have female terrorists as well to do a man's job.😆

Sunny you should write a book and advise when a man is allowed to cry:

1. If someone close passes away all of a sudden

2. If he is an actor in a sad movie

3. If he sees the suffering of others ( not himself)

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Megha

@MeghaSRKLover

Sparkler

Posted: 15 years ago

#34

everyone has the right to express thier emotions, its the same for men and women

to me if a man never cried that would be so inhuman

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Believe

@-Believe-

Stunner

+ 2

Posted: 15 years ago

#35

Originally posted by: Midnight_Shade

Crying is a part of feminine qualities ONLY? Oh yeah? 😳
Look at the two underlined statements you've written and see how they contradict with each other. How can crying be a basic human nature and only meant for females at the same time? Should I conclude that you're chronically confused or should I ask you to enlighten me more with your muft ki gyaan you keep providing people about women?

I think you miss to read my thrid page post!

Originally posted by: Believe

Love, trust, beauty, sincerity, truthfulness, authenticity -- these are all feminine qualities, n they are far gr8r than any qualities that man has....Thre is no need to feel yourself weak because of your feminine qualities. U should feel grateful to existence tht what man has to earn, you have been given by nature as a gift. Man has to learn how to love......Man has to learn how to let the heart be the master and the mind be just an obedient servant. Man has to learn these things.........The woman brings these things with her, but we condemn all these qualities as weaknesses.😊

.

I would like the whole world to be full of feminine qualities. Thn only can wars disappear. Then only can marriage disappear....Thn only can nations disappear....Thn only can we have one world....a loving, a peaceful, a silent and beautiful world.😊

.

Science says...whether man or womn, is born of a father n of a mother. Half of his being is contributed by man and half by woman, so everybody is both. If u are a man, then the man is on top and underneath it, hidden, are all the feminine qualities, the contribution from your mother. If you are a woman, then your feminine qualities are on top and your male qualities are underneath it😊

So keep your feminine qualities...dont loose it!!😊

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438673

Hibernated

Posted: 15 years ago

#36

Originally posted by: Believe

I think you miss to read my thrid page post!

Yeah, i've already read it. Thanks for quoting it again. You're STILL saying that crying is only a feminine quality whatsoever. Okay, agreed that you have that kind of mindset and perhaps you live among distraught ladies who keep bothering you with their weepy drama.......soo much that now you think that crying is only a female quality.
But dude, are you kiddin me? You really think you can go around telling people that crying is only a girl's job without getting called a psyche? Why are you dragging all the women of the world to the particular weepy group of women you've been living with all this time?
Men cry too, not coz women rubbed off on them but coz they are gifted with the tear ducts too. Or is it like when women cry, it's crying but when men cry, it's only ventilating their eyes?😛
I really have no idea what weakness or strength you're talking about. You took my post in a wrong way. I never said that crying is a weakness, so your explanation on that was not needed at all. Nevertheless, thank you.
Both men and women have things to learn from each other. Why are you saying that only women know how to love, be authentic and truthful? Have you had some horrible experiences with men in the past or what? On what basis are you categorizing these abstract and ethical qualities into two genders? I'm really curious.

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Ajnabee

@*Woh Ajnabee*

Stunner

Posted: 15 years ago

#37

Originally posted by: Believe

There are plenty of men in the world possess the so-called "feminine" qualities of love, trust, sincerity, authenticity, etc etc. I'm not sure what you're trying to say. Granted there are apparent differences between the two genders, but you're speaking of personality characteristics, which doesn't make any sense to me. How did this go from men crying to what science says about a woman?

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Summer3

@Summer3

Trailblazer

+ 2

Posted: 15 years ago

#38

OKay let us see what a Sufi has to say about male and female qualities.
Both male and female physical bodies are made of the 5 elements. But the Sufi then clarifies further to say that all creation is the female aspect and the formless God is the male aspect.

Essential Difference Between Male and Female

A man asked a Sufi, "People talk about male and female, but what is the essential difference between the two?"

The Sufi replied, "O man, both are formed of the five elements. The concept of male and female applies to the body. The Artist who created the male and female merely decorated them differently. The body is a cage, a house in which either can dwell, but you are deceived by the decorations.

"If you think of this with wisdom, you will see that womanly qualities are soft and delicate. In the decorations of womanliness, there is a beauty that is like gold, a beauty that attracts. The energy in their faces and bodies is like a magnet. The male has a similar magnetic energy, but his is on the inside. Though men lack the gentleness and outer softness which attracts externally, they have the strong inner magnetic energy which is attracted by, and connects to, the outer magnetism residing in the face and form of a woman.

"The world says male and female, but if you reflect with your wisdom, you will realize that male and female are like two kinds of breath, like the sun and the moon. The two breaths are called the art of the sun's heat, which is the male, and the art of the moon's coolness, which is the female.

"In the sky, the moon is lower and the sun is higher. The moon takes in the light of the sun and sends it out as cool yellow rays in the night.

"But the original light must be understood. The power which is neither male nor female is light, and that is the point which both male and female must reach. You can understand this through the example of the sun and the moon in the sky and through the example of male and female on earth.

"Your understanding will be contained in two words: la ilaha, there is nothing other than You'the outgoing breath, on the left side; illallahu, You are Allah'the incoming breath, on the right side. These two breaths meet in Allah.

"In the same way, the soul which came from God must return to its source. You must return to Him in the same form in which you came from Him. This is the only state God will accept.

"The five parts called earth, fire, water, air, and ether cannot reach Him; they belong to the world. Do not be enamored with them, thinking of them as male and female. Discard them and say la ilaha on the left, and illallahu on the right. There is nothing other than God. If there is nothing else, then there is no male or female. When there is no male or female, there is only light. You must attain that light. That is divine wisdom, or gnanam.

"When God is the power and you are the light, the power is male and you are female. You must reach that power. Everything you see and desire will change. Everything you see in form or without form will change. The changeless power is the only male. God is the power, you are the ray. When this male and female merge, it is called gnanam and resplendence, light and completeness, Nur and Allah, insan kamil and wisdom.

"Both male and female qualities exist in the body. The male qualities are arrogance, strength, egoism, and fanaticism while the qualities of humility, reverence, devotion to God, beauty, and grace are the qualities of womanliness, the beautiful qualities. They male's arrogant qualities want to control the beautiful female qualities and get on top of them.

"If man destroys the arrogant qualities of his ego, if he cherishes the womanly qualities and behaves as a woman toward God, he will be able to establish a connection with God.

"If men would have the qualities of women, the peace and tranquility of womanliness, then in the same way that women are beautiful, God's beauty would enter them. Male qualities are the qualities of a male lion, a beast. If the male lion would change into a beautiful and gentle woman, it would no longer be male or female and it would receive the beauty of God's qualities. Those qualities would fall in love with God, winning the light of God and receiving His beauty."

Muhaiyaddeen, M.R. Bawa. The Golden Words of a Sufi Sheikh. Philadelphia: Fellowship Press, 1981, 2006. 147-149.

Bawa Muhaiyaddeen for over 50 years selflessly shared his knowledge with people of every race, religion'from all parts of the world. Before Bawa's passing in 1986 he wrote "Peace and the Mind" and requested that everyone in the world receive a copy. If you would like your FREE copy please Click Here! www.onegodonly.com

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return_to_hades

@return_to_hades

Stunner

+ 6

Posted: 15 years ago

#39

Originally posted by: hindu4lyf

Haha the complete opposite of what I like for my boys to be like.

I stay away from emos as much as possible, they usually get on my last nerve!

I have to clarify its a "bit" emo, not completely emo. Personally, I feel the whole 'emo' movement is the other extreme of sensitivity .

Gabe is no weepy guy. He's a cool hilarious dude.

Has anyone seen the web series 'Hope is Emo' or the song 'Emo Kid'? Awesome parodies of the emo movement. 😆

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438673

Hibernated

Posted: 15 years ago

#40

Originally posted by: Summer3

"Both male and female qualities exist in the body. The male qualities are arrogance, strength, egoism, and fanaticism while the qualities of humility, reverence, devotion to God, beauty, and grace are the qualities of womanliness, the beautiful qualities. They male's arrogant qualities want to control the beautiful female qualities and get on top of them.

Muhaiyaddeen, M.R. Bawa. The Golden Words of a Sufi Sheikh. Philadelphia: Fellowship Press, 1981, 2006. 147-149.

Well, that might be one of the million ways of looking at human traits.....the bible says something else though.....it says that Adam ( a man) was created by God as his look alike...and then he later created Eve from one of Adam's ribs....they say that Eve ( a woman) was responsible for making Adam eat the apple and upset God...so, basically, they blame women for the bad things happening in the world....same goes to Pandora's box.....Pandora made the other dude (can't remember his name) open that box full of negativites...jealousy, envy, etc ...thus, making Pandora (a girl) responsible for the bad things happening today....Basically, we can't rely on a single source to define human characteristics.
.......but seriously, I wasn't aware that qualities like empathy, truthfulness, deception, arrogance, etc could ever be put down as "male" and "female" qualities. I thought those qualities depended on how people conduct themselves and how they were brought up. Too bad there are also gender biases in human conscience and morality, though it doesn't make any sense to me whatsoever.

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