my WRONG punch... BOOBY TRAP!!!

gadhadada thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#1


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visrom thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#2
Please....stop saying sorry and putting 😭 smileys along with every post and PMs.
Please delete this 'ABHIJEET CENTRIC STORY…. BUT!!! I say SORRY to HIM as well…. Its really IMPOSSIBLE to convert his AMAZING XPRESSIVE XPRESSIONS into DIALOGUES…. frankly GALS/GUYS its an INSULT for his XPRESSIONS…. It's the MOST DIFFICULT work… I DID🤢…. Tum log mujhay jitna bhi BURA kaho… KUM hay…. I felt a BIG GUILT on myself😡….. plz BEAR…. I m so SORRY PPL…. Cry '
I am pleading with you.......!!!!!!!!!!
LavenderCrystal thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#3
really nice story😊.........very nicely written.😊............loved it😃
Edited by nimi697 - 14 years ago
Bhavanab thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#4
please as Vis said remove that starting message for readers. that itself puts us down. I thought of reading but the message itself stopped me from doing so
neeme thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#5
Gadhadada, Dont post These kinds of messges with Smilies like 😭😭..........U have no need to say Sorry....It is Upto readers to like the Story or not....If u really feel that u r going to do Somethng Wrong then just dont do it...But Dont Post these kinds of messges in the Start or end of ur Story..Just Post ur Story.....Its My Advice...
Now, Lets move to ur Story..i like ur Story..I feel Ur main Efforts was to show Duo Frendshp....Which was truly showing in ur Story..But i have one Question....I cannot ask Question from FW but i can Ask it from u atleast abt ur story😆....
MANAGER: Sir humaray COLLEGE mein tou aisay CHARITY PLAYS hotay rehtay hain…. kal PREETY meray pass aayii thi… wo COLLEGE kay TRUSTY ki beti aur buhat achi student bhi thi… us nay kaha kay wo CID kay Sr Ins ABHIJEET ko PLAY per kaam karnay per raazi ker chuki hay aur wo bhi aaj subah aayein gay…. phir Ins ABHIJEET aayey aur hum nay in ko ORGANISER aur PLAY DIRECTOR say milwa diya….
Manger was answring to Abhijeet, then how can he is not recongnizing Abhijeet ????????😕
debasree04 thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#6
Gadhadada.....Plz dnt post these kind of messages in the start as well as end.....it's a request....& plz delete this.......it creates a very bad impression on readers.....& dnt say sorry each & every time...u write a story acc to ur imagination & it is upto readers whether it is good or not.....& frankly speaking u r a good writer & so just dnt worry.....write stories & post it without any hesitation.....
Ur story is good....I like it.....duo friendship is very well written 👏👏
I have some question.....Abhijit is under arrest & he is investigating as Sr Ins Daya but nobody cant recognize him as he going such places where everybody knows him.....how is it possible????? Is he in disguise....then u should mention it.....
cid_duo thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#7

nice story.....intersting plot with great detection........

very funny scene😆😆

"On next day…. DAYA and ABHIJEET moving out from bearue…. ABHIJEET had a WATER bottle in his hand… he saw DIG moved upstair of bearue in quick mode…. he open the bottle and suddenly hit his shoulder to DIG shoulder just show its an unintentional act…. DIG slipped with the water spills and moved in high speed from 28 stair so quickly to the end… ABHIJEET gripped DAYA's hand so tightly… everyone stunned… his GUARDS and DRIVER moved to stand him…. a SMILE comes on ABHIJEET lips…

ABHIJEET: tum nay hath lagany say mana kiya tha… (smile) dhakka denay say tou nahi….."


and very sweet words for me😊

.

"""""ABHIJEET (forcefully): DAYA kay sath koi zyadti ho jayey aur ABHIJEET usay chor day…. aisa ho hee nahi sakta… kabhi sochna bhi nahi… samjhay…..""""""


gadhadada thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#8


SO SORRY TO ALL.... AB IS KAY ILAWA KOI AUR CHEEZ NAHI HAY MERAY PASS KEHNAY KO.... yaar main... acha choro..... kahir....
ya thoray say LOOP HOLES thay jo main nay SET ker diyey....
ya DEBA n NEEME DII.... arry main nay pehlay hee bata diya hay kay ABHIJEET Sir DISGUISE hulyey mein thay........ before entering on LAB 2nd time and before meeting to COLLEGE MANAGEMENT n ORGANISER or iis kay baad wo MAKEUP mein hee thay....
gadhadada thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#9

hey buddies.... yahan wo lines QUOTE nahi ho rahi hain.... but dekho...

"

ABHIJEET: oh my GOD…. ye tou meri GUN hay…. tou wo!!!!

He checked the NUMBER….. and then remembered that on previous day… DAYA shuffled his cloths while he was lying on his bed with all his personals and in that shuffling…. the GUN wrapped in cloths and DAYA placed the bunch on wardrobe without second look….. ABHIJEET called to SALUNKHY and told him the latest …. SALUNKHY advised him to be in DISGUISE and told him to be at LAB early with the GUN…. after moved out from room…. someone place hand on FREDDIE shoulder…. FREDDIE moves….

FREDDIE (in scare): kau… kaun……

ABHIJEET: tumhari aatma…. chalo.. "


ye wo LINES hain... where i mentioned about his DISGUISE....

ab yaar itna tou FW ka asar nahi hua hay.... thora mera apna DIMAGH tou chal rah hay......😉😆


gadhadada thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#10

ya more....

BUNDLEZ of THANX to VISROM DII.... BHAVNAB DII.... NEEME DII.... SAMEEN.... CHAMP.... DEBA and obviously SHIVANI.... to like the story!!!

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