STORY CONTEST 3 - RESULTS ON PAGE 10

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Menrva

@Minionite

Channel Moderator

+ 45

Team Silver Trio

Posted: 14 years ago

#51

Originally posted by: bhinder.kamboj
@dr. Fahmi well some don't have murder included..... and yes, just finished by reading comments .. what does dragging means ?

Actually dragging is a term used in writing a lot. It means that a scene is being forced to continue even though it should end. I've used the term in my reviews as well. I'm posting them in a little while.

For example, if CID caught a criminal and the criminal confessed, unnecessary dragging would happen if CID continued to question the criminal and the criminal kept repeating what he or she had said before.

Edited by luv_cid_shreya - 14 years ago

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Menrva

@Minionite

Channel Moderator

+ 45

Team Silver Trio

Posted: 14 years ago

#52

Story 1	I really liked the story. I've never been to Rajasthan, but the way you described everything made me feel as if I knew exactly how Maharajas and Maharanis are. You did deviate from the plot though and missed parts of the plot all together. Nevertheless, the way you handled the theft case was very good. It was quite CID centric. 👏👍🏼
Story 2	I liked the casual start to the story. However, the point of the gold being used for research was missing. I really liked the way you used each CID officer, especially Daya, who was very sweet. I just want to make one suggestion to you. I noticed that you capitalized each name, but you could do without that. It makes the story look very messed up. The team was well used and everyone played an important part. I felt that the duo scene in the end was too far stretched and used words that were a bit hard to imagine. Nevertheless, I liked the investigation. 👏👍🏼
Story 3	The cake scene in the beginning was very interesting and good. Again, I liked the whole investigation portion of your story. You also used simple clues and many investigation tools such as fingerprinting to solve the case. However, at many points throughout the story there were problems with connectivity. The scenes simply did not flow from one to the next. Apart from that, a nice attempt. 👏👍🏼
Story 4	Great story. It was thorough and compact. There were no unnecessary scenes or lines. The team was well used and everyone was present. Again, the only slight problem I had was with a bit of the connectivity, but otherwise, very nice. 👏👍🏼
Story 5	Another great story. The whole investigation portion was good, but your story was pretty long. It took a long time for me to finish the stories and in parts it felt like the story was dragging. Otherwise, very good. 👏👍🏼
Story 6	Again, this was another very long story. If you had written your story in dialogue form instead of narration form, then it would have helped a lot and decreased the length. Another great investigation. The team was distributed well and everyone had their own portion. On the whole, it was a very good story. 👏👍🏼
Story 7	A good story. It was short and kept the pace well. The suspense was well built and team distribution and storyline were good. There was no unnecessary dragging. Nice story. 👏👍🏼
Story 8	This story was really too good. I liked all the twists and turns you used in your story. The forensic scene in the night was very good. It gave me the feel as if I was actually watching this story. Overall very good. 👏👍🏼
Story 9	This story was good, but it seemed to be dragging a lot. You kept losing pace, but the flow was good. The ending was very nice. The only other problem I had was with the trio. They didn't seem like themselves or the way I've seen them throughout CID. Nonetheless, a good attempt. 👏👍🏼
Story 10	I don't have much to say about this story. It was short and simple. I liked it and especially liked the way you maintained the continuity. Keep up the good work. 👏👍🏼
Story 11	The storyline and the team distribution were good. Again, there was some dragging in places, but that wasn't a problem because the pace was well kept. Good work. 👏👍🏼

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dr.fahmi

@dr.fahmi

Inactive

Posted: 14 years ago

#53

Originally posted by: bhinder.kamboj
@dr. Fahmi well some don't have murder included..... and yes, just finished by reading comments .. what does dragging means ?

yep u r right, some of them dont have murder included😊

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m_kal2011

@m_kal2011

Rocker

Posted: 14 years ago

#54

I was going through the reviews of the story. I found that many have mentioned that in the given plot the gold was for research, but here is the plot where there is no mention of research. Does project always mean research only?
There is a top secret project which a company is working on. They need 100 gold bars for the manufacture of some components. A guy, Raghu goes to the bank to get the gold bars. He puts the gold bars in his briefcase, which also contains some top secret documents. He puts the briefcase in the back seat of his car. There's a plainclothes cop with a gun along with him in the left side seat. The car is locked, the windows are shut, A/C is on. Raghu drives straight from the bank to his office, which is 10 kms away from the bank. Traffic is heavy, it's broad daylight. When he reaches his destination, the briefcase is gone. No damage to the car, no locks broken, no windows broken.

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visrom

@visrom

Stunner

+ 4

Posted: 14 years ago

#55

It can mean anything m_kal....I meant that I wanted to see a bit more of non-jewellery stuff and going on to something more dangerous.

I had something else in mind....forget it...the stories so far are good and I am yet to read 7 more.

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Bhavanab

@Bhavanab

Stunner

+ 2

Posted: 14 years ago

#56

Ok I've read the stories and sent in my scores !!! Have guessed very less people this time as only 2 or 3 of regular writers were there and mostly new !!! One thing I want to say is that almost everyone has done a great job !! It was indeed tough giving scores !! And really I wasn't expecting such lovely ways of writing about the theft !!

Well as Visrom has said earlier I was expecting some innovative interpretation of the terms 'GOLD' and 'Secret Documents' in the stories !! Some stories gave that some didn't !! I wanted to see some mystery regarding the documents and what is it in that which can be turned to something dangerous !!! Yes I agree I missed some stories a lot like Suhaani dii's , Sunny's and others but seriously everyone has done a lovely job !! Above all what I want to say is the way you've done with investigation parts and the way the theft happens I loved them !!! Regarding my story I felt it could have been better hadn't I been in my dreamland till 5-6 hours before the deadline 😛 but still all in all I want to say Good Job everyone !!! Reading such lovely stories make me wish if we all were the creative dept. of the show !!! A simple theft plot has been written in such a good way !! So Pat on your backs ! Finish reading stories,send your scores and write reviews 😛

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m_kal2011

@m_kal2011

Rocker

Posted: 14 years ago

#57

Originally posted by: visrom
It can mean anything m_kal....I meant that I wanted to see a bit more of non-jewellery stuff and going on to something more dangerous.
I had something else in mind....forget it...the stories so far are good and I am yet to read 7 more.

It's all right. I found some were talking about research, that's why I asked.

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Bhavanab

@Bhavanab

Stunner

+ 2

Posted: 14 years ago

#58

yaar !! You'll laugh at this but don't know why i want you all to finish reading these stories and results to be out soon !! 😛 has someone guessed mine ?? Only one has guessed me correct till now !! Have I written such a different story kya ??? 5 mein se just one right guess 😛

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SAGNIKA

@Shagnika

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 14 years ago

#59

I final;ly managed to read the stories and also review them !! I am quite surprised how I managed !! 😆 I must say.. a BIG round of applause for all the writers. We all did a decent job considering the mental state we all are in . handling a plot like this, that too differently is a tough job. Most of us did manage to keep in mind the characters that we know well... Good job.. Much better than some FW writers would have done. Proud to be among such lovely writers !! I am glad that new people joined in this time. Thanks a lot for participation and hoping to read more from you all. Missed some awesome writers of the forum this time. Anyways, Visrom, thanks a lot for organising the contest so nicely and giving us such a lovely plot...👏.. here goes my review. A frank onw, so please dont mind !!!

Story 1- Well, the plot said about "secret project" of a company. Apart from that the story was well written. The descriptions were very clear and nice. It was good to see the team in a royal palace ! The poem in the painting was quite simple and good. Overall, a good story, well written. Slightly drifted from the plot though. Would like to read some more from you !

Story 2- Sachin got scolded.. Thats funny to see how we end up landing Sachin in troublesome situations in our stories and make ACP scold him!
Jokes apart, it was a good attempt. The casual scenes became over the top... And as a result a little out of characters. The "sunglass" clue was different and good. Rest, it was a nice attempt. Good job.

Story 3- Nice story. Plot handled quite well. Well done. Mystery was nicely maintained and news about fake Raghu was nicely given. Famous concept of Plastic surgery was used. Quite similar to FW tacticts but handled in a much much better way.

Story 4- A very nicely scripted and planned story! Dialogues were so familiar that I could actually hear them speaking. Every clue is very well handled..! Well done! Looking forward for more from the writer.

Story 5- A nicely described story. But so many murders inspite of CID investigating the case is something i dont like much. 2 guys died in front of CID after giving some clue. That was a good luck of the team ! Anyways, a good story, with lots of twists and turns !! there were quite a number of characters, which added to the interest.

Story 6 – Very nice story. Quite long but interesting. The narrations were really good. I am sure, dialogues would have made it sound even better! Never mind.. its still very good. Want more from this writer..All the BEST.

Story 7 – A Very nicely written story. Good and simple !! The pace was well maintained. Team was well distributed. A nice story to read!! Good job. Looking forward for more from you.

Story 8 – Nice attempt. A bit long but interesting. High on drama. It could have been better if that was slight less. But nice friendship and light moments. The suspense about Abhijeet's Jaipur visit was well built up. Overall, a good job. Will be expecting more from this writer !

Story 9 – Nice ending !! Interesting ! The characters seemed out of themselves at times. The pace could have been better. But I liked the story considering the end ! Good job.

Story 10 - Reading this takes me to many of old cases of of CID and also of IF writers! This must be an old writer of our forum! Short and simple story. Made proper use of the characters. The TRIO specially! A nice way of using Abhi's "memory" issue. Although we are already tired of Abhi's memory issue thanks to AKAKR, but this one was surely different from present situation! Reminds me lot about "Abhijeet in Danger" and "Traitors in CID" and some others from IF.! Overall, a decebt job!

Story 11 – I liked the story. The writing style was very clear and I am sure this one too is from an old writer of our forum. I seriously feel that !! Abhi-Daya argument issue was well handled. Perfectly in sync with the characters. A little dragging in the sense, when shown on TV, the descriptions are necessary, but when written on paper, that becomes lengthy. Such details need not be given dialogues at times. Just narration would have done the job at certain points. The concept of the entire car being replaced was good. Salunke's detection was also praiseworthy. Overall, a nice story. Keep it up !

Will be sending in the marks by tonight...😊

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dr.fahmi

@dr.fahmi

Inactive

Posted: 14 years ago

#60

Originally posted by: Shagnika
Sachin got scolded.. Thats funny to see how we end up landing Sachin in troublesome situations in our stories and make ACP scold him!

i remember when plot was given, and members asked if cop in plain clothes can be one from CID, i feared that sachin was going to be in trouble, but i m glad i was wrong, only 2 stories had sachin as that cop, and i liked how duo were there to support him in both😊 ACP sir se tu dant parh he jati hai😆

Edited by dr.fahmi - 14 years ago

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STORY CONTEST 3 - RESULTS ON PAGE 10 - Page 6

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