Teekhi Mirchi's CC Thread 3--invite Only - Page 8

I am going to have a general discussion here and no, I am not going to talk here about just these fictional characters or how Riddz should be with Armaan or how Sid and Riddz are being forced or emotionally blackmailed into this marriage . No , it is NOT about DMG. It is a societal discussion.

This post is about how we as a society have not changed - how nobody believes a man and a woman when they say nothing happened between them - how the society is a gold medalist in distributing gold medals and character certificates. And how this 'fear' of the typical 'Log Kya Kahenge' and 'Tumse shaadi kaun karega' attitude suffocates half the young generation even when they have not done anything.

Riddhima and Sid already have a shady impression of something brewing between them , thanks to that tamaasha of the photographs that happened in front of the whole hospital. Sid tried to explain but Keerti said that it would not change anything - the damage was done.

And then that damned body heat incident which resulted in Riddhima believing that Sid had slept with her...

The judgmental idiot that she is - she screamed in front of everyone - every single staffer of Sanjivani that Sid had apparently 'Raped' her ( somebody spank this woman.)...in front of her father who listens to her horrified ... and so does the whole world.

So , the typical conservative society that we are - there and then , a character certificate must have been given to both Sid and Riddhima.

I don't know what triggers what but in the promo , we see a broken Shanky asking Riddhima to marry Siddhant. ...

Forget even thinking about it , these two people are not on even civil terms because of Riddhima's prejudiced hatred and Sid's reticent silence.

The decision is WRONG and will only make life worse for both Sid and Riddz. Life has been such a whiirlwind for them ever since they have met each-other that they have never had the chance to even think of what is between them. Riddhima is madly in love with Armaan and Sid , recovering from Tammz' heartbreak is in the middle of nowhere.

Now...let's talk about it.

Like numerous Ekta and non-Ekta shows , this show is also a reflection of how water-tight the minds of our society are.

Shanky knows that he is putting both Sid and Riddz's life at stake but he is still asking them to get married. Because a father knows that once a daughter's honour is lost and that too as badly as Riddhima's because of her stupid stupid stupid outburst , it is not coming back. Nobody will look at Riddhima in the same way as before - she is pristine but nobody will believe that. Family's honour will also fade . As a father , the first question that comes into his mind is - who will marry my daughter? Who will respect her?...

No... these thoughts are not inborn... our stone age society drives all this nonsense into their heads. Don't we see all this crap around us all the freakin' time ?


- Uski shaadi toot gayee, ab usse kaun shaadi karega?

- She has had three affairs. Which decent man will marry her?

- You have to retain family honour. Don't tell your husband about your past love life!

The fact is that a woman's honour is as sensitive as a lamp flame that simply needs to be fed by the oil of approval from the society. Nobody is going to believe women if they say they did nothing standing next to a man. We live in that world , where if a girl talks to a boy in Block A ...everybody in Block Z will know about it and aunties and uncles will instantly get down to the task of giving character certificates.

Women have it really hard. Seriously. Sometimes you think whether it is a crime that you are a woman.

If this was a real life situation, even if Sid -Riddz screamed from the rooftops that nothing happened between them , nobody would believe them and they would forever be labeled a ' Shameful Liaison'. It is the same - from a rural village to Colaba in Mumbai and Greater Kailash in Delhi.

A man and woman are looked in just one way in certain societies and we are a part of it.

So many times, we hear of rape cases being withdrawn because the rapist agrees to marry the victim. So many times, we come to know of rushed marriages done for the sake of a girl's honour and it is a crime to be a woman whose engagement has broken and even worse if she is divorced.

Shanky is acting no different. He is thinking of Riddhima's future like a typical father who wonders 'Meri beti ka kya hoga' .

Riddhima and Siddhant have done nothing that they need to be ashamed of , but amidst those bitching swords and giggles, nobody is going to listen to their voices... not even Shashank.

Gauri-Pratham in Kutumb, Kajal-Arjun in KDMH , Kanwaljeet-Shraddha Nigam in Waaris, the lead couple in Colors' forthcoming 'Aise na karo Vida' , Sumit-Kumkum in Kumkum , Amitabh-Jaya in Silsila... they all got married in the name of HONOUR , reflecting that no matter how much we progress and evolve... we will forever belong in the stone age where a man is needed to cover a woman's body and protect her honour - her innocence notwithstanding.

In the serial, it is a very typical but unexpected twist. But in real life it is very typical and expected solution when a sword hangs over your head only because you are a woman and your honour is at stake. Humph.

I did not watch the episode fully due to workie-workie and deadline ki talwaar hanging on my head but whatever I caught of it - I have just two things to say.

1. Riddhima can never ever repay the goodness, kindness and compassion of Shashank and Sid. The least I say about her and her treatment of the two , the better it is.

2. Sid-Yuvi-Naina -JP-Jiggy. My post is about them and a small effort to understand the clay feet of human relationships when the time comes to rise to the occasion.

So, today , like always both in reel life and real life - a group of friends refused to even listen , forget believing that what their ostracized friend had to say.

Riddhima accused Sid of rape on All India Radio and all eyes narrowed in his direction in a disgusting fashion. It is alright. Expected. Human beings are human beings, victims of the shortcomings of mortal nature - so it was okay if they doubted Sid. It is a natural reaction seeing a woman go so hysterical and shattered over a sexual attack even if it is hallucinated.

But wait a minute.

When we are accused and blamed for something that we have not even done , who is the first person you expect to come running and envelope you into a bear hug? Who is the first person you want to throw your arms around and cry that 'I didn't do it, please believe me.' ? Who is the first person you believe will make everything okay by taking your hand and saying that they understand? - Your family and friends.

Sid is all alone . He has no family here and the only people he can fall back on are Yuvi, Naina , JP and Jiggy - his friends, the only people he gathers in a group hug. Today , they let him down - a second time round. Again. I don't expect anything from Riddhima and the likes as far as fair justice for this man is concerned because she is an outsider who doesn't know what kind of a man Sid is... but his friends? They have been with him for so long - seen him , known him , been with him - don't they know what Sid is made of?

And I guess... Real Life relationships are no different either.

Our friends - most of them and most of the time end up letting us down when we need them the most. They punch us in the gut when we least expect them to . They fall short of our humble human expectations and as we look at them in shock , they either hang their heads in embarrassed helplessness or just look away saying that they are sorry - they couldn't be there for you. It hurts and it is terrible - I have known people who have married twice over but... but never made a friend again in life after being betrayed once. That is the extent upto which a man or a woman has a capability of hurting you.

It is not that all your friends out there are vile cobras who live only to play kitchen politics with you and demolish you. No. It is just that they end up being victims of mortal nature - sometimes due to a behavioural drawback , a basic humane courage deficiency , insensitivity , lack of both IQ and EQ, inferior love and trust , our friends fail in their basic moral duty towards us.

We get hurt - confront them , fight with them , pack our bags and go out of their lives. And in case we don't tell them what paper roses they have been , we continue paralysed friendships , clinking champagne glasses , getting pictures clicked but there is NO HEART in those friendships. You stop caring from within and you will never go running to wipe their tears at 3.30am ever again.

Faith , love and healing are an emotional need of any relationship and it evolves the most beautifully in friendship because friends are those kinds of people - whom you accept and hug as they are without setting red lines like in other bonds. And the day you realize that your friends did not stand by you because their suspicion won over their faith in you , their impulsive emotional reaction won over their love for you - you are shattered and you never smile at a stranger again.

Yuvi, Naina, JP and Jigster should not have believed everything in case Sid told them what happened - that would have been blind faith. But that they did not listen to him at all , did not shake him up and ask him what happened - that is being BLIND. This is just a serial- tomorrow they all will be partying again. But if it was real life , then, Sid would have never believed in friendship again , no matter what.

We may forget what our friends said or even what they did - but we will never forget how they made us feel at that heartbreaking moment.

The best thing is to be emotionally independent and understand that everything is rosy today - these are my friends, i love them- but tomorrow can be different - they can hurt me, I can hurt them - not that we are fickle , it is just that we are mortal. At the end of the day... I am my own friend. Rest is just a walk in the clouds and am smiling through as long as it lasts.

Dearest Sid-Riddhima,

I really don't want to know where to start or what to say to both of you. I am still reeling under a strange mixed feeling of shock , guilt , numbness and ... i don't know what, really. I had just come to the terms with the reality that you are married Riddhima , that you are Mrs.Riddhima Siddhanth Modi ... that you are married to this lovely sweetheart of a guy called Siddhanth...and then, you and Siddhanth punched me in the gut again and it is still paining. I mean... there is a strange guilt and it is funny because i know i meant no harm and i know that i have not done anything intentionally to hurt you or harm either of you.

Sid, the sight of the divorce papers in Riddhima's hands and her ceaseless sobbing doesn't leave my eyes. Riddhima , your heart-piercing scream - Siddhanth Modi wants to divorce me keeps echoing in my ears. In a way you both pulled out my heart with bare hands - Sid , you hurt me by sending divorce papers to Riddhima inspite if my conversation with you which i deemed sensible - Riddhima , you hurt me my suggesting in a twisted way in your agony that I am trying to snatch Sid away from you by my sheer presence. As it is , it is an emotional upheaval for me to deal with reailty , to deal with the realization that what both of you mean to each-other - then , why are you both making it so difficult for me to even breathe with Sid thinking that I am Riddhima's happiness and pushing her away with full force and with Riddhima thinking that i am a danger to her marriage and that it is because of me that Sid is receding away?

No. It is not my fault ... i just don't want to think it is my fault because it really isn't . The fault is with BOTH OF YOU! Is it my fault that you both have individual thinking zones where you both cook up your own reality and then vent out everything on me? NO.

Riddhima, instead of screaming your lungs out at me and ruing over Siddhanth , did you make any effort to confront your husband whom you don't want to leave? No.You didn't.

Siddhanth, instead of deciding on your own where Riddhima's happiness is whether and why she wants to be with you , did you make any effort to ask Riddhima how she feels about you? No. You didn't. It is you and Riddhima who have put me between your blossoming marriage by your sheer goodness and vulnerability that edges on being CERTIFIED FOOLISHNESS.

And i refuse to feel guilty, Mrs. and Mr. Siddhanth Modi.

I am the reason that you both are ripping each-other apart? NO. You both are hurting each-other because of each-other and yet you both don't let go of that small hope of healing. Otherwise, Riddhima , you would have never pleaded with your father to stop Sid from leaving you ... otherwise, Sid, you wouldn't have turned on my footsteps with that strange but pensive smile on your face thinking me to be your wife Riddhima...

I am sorry Sid for what i did to you - for provoking you in the locker room - for saying all the harsh words that i pricked into you - for pushing you to the limits of your emotional cliff and your mental patience - for raising my hand at you ... but what can i do? Riddhima doesn't want this divorce - you don't want this divorce and i had to find out why! ...And when you finally let go of your pretentious hostility and your numbness ( which i have always found very disturbing) ...and when you screamed at me that you love Riddhima... it was a strange feeling - it stabbed my heart to hear those words for Riddhima from another man's mouth but at the same time , i felt a balmy feeling of relief - of a happiness that i didn't know but i felt for Riddhima. For myself , a relief on that stupid stupid guilt that i had taken you away from Riddhima... no, i have not. She is still there in your heart... you love her ,Sid and Armaan Malik doesn't hate you for saying that. I can't explain how it felt hearing those words from you... but for a few seconds, i was somewhere else . Somewhere else.

I don't know what will happen next, Sid. I don't know how I will feel tomorrow or how am i ever going to thread you and Riddhima back together... will i do that at all? Will i be able to do that at all? No idea.

But tonight when i go to sleep, i have your emotionally wrought face and your poignant confession in my mind - Kyunki main usse pyaar karta hoon...the echo is still throbbing in my head and trust me , when you said you love Riddhima, you shook my heart and then... you seeped down to my bones...