why can't Men do Household Chores like Us??: Vidya Balan

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bips

@bips

Sparkler

+ 8

Posted: 7 years ago

#21

Originally posted by: Parvati..

I wanted to give the original poster a piece of my mind for bringing my mom into the discussion but decided against it coz her intention wasn't wrong.

I'll kindly ask you to f**k off.

I won't argue with your viewpoint as it's obvious that we are on completely different pages

I just want to apologize if you felt even for a second that i brought your mom into the conversation... That wasn't what i was aiming for.. Families should not be dragged into a debate..My mom (and for that matter all the moms i have seen in any family) work tirelessly... So I just meant generally ask moms how they feel about this... Peace.

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709927

Hibernated

Posted: 7 years ago

#22

Also Vidya:

"I am a boring eater. I want variety in my films, not in food. It makes for an interesting headline but you wonder how the conversation will proceed over food. But when you are with Vidya Balan, nothing can be tedious. "I have no interest in cooking. My mother used to say, seekh lo' and I would confidently respond that I will earn enough money to hire a cook. Before marriage also, she persisted, if the cook didn't turn up some day', I said, order karoongi!, she laughs filling the air at the quiet Shang Palace in Shangri-La Eros Hotel with oodles of energy. With twice cooked tofu and pineapple in Yunnan sauce and wok tossed lotus root, water chestnuts in XO sauce for company, she gets talking. After marriage, she continues, "When some nosy neighbours came and said, Oh! you don't cook, I said, yes, Siddharth (Roy Kapur), also doesn't cook. Very bad!

A complete vegetarian, over the years, Vidya's understanding of what goes into what has improved and now she can instinctively give suggestions on what works. "My father-in-law is a great cook and he explains to me the hows and whys of cooking. Earlier I had understanding of South Indian food, with him I am trying to unravel Punjabi cuisine.

It is difficult because before marriage just the sight of oil on top of a dish was enough to "kill her. "After marriage, I realised that my in-laws believe that rich food is the only food. On the first Sunday lunch after marriage, I was shocked how rich that food was in terms of ghee and nuts. I wondered how much of it was going to be wasted. Nothing was wasted! All was polished off. Now, he gives me stuff with less oil but it is still more than what I can handle, she gushes.

However, when Vidya is in kitchen, even tea is not a safe bet. "My water and milk remain separate, she grins. "Once I tried omelette to impress Siddharth and it ended in burji. My dosas don't take shape either. So she was not asked to prepare a traditional meal after marriage? "No way. They couldn't risk it. They told me we will cook for you.

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Aisha

@MOTHERHOOD

Stunner

+ 10

Posted: 7 years ago

#23

Originally posted by: Parvati..

Yes
My dad makes enough so my mom doesn't have to go out and do other people's chores. She is happy sorting her own house.
It just works fine with us.
I guess you don't like it and wanna advice me on why it's not right way to run a family?

Go on tell me how your family is run and how it's so perfect compared to mine.😆

Cleaning your own house is nothing to be ashamed of. Anyone can do it. Be it man or woman.

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Erika

@roni_berna

Stunner

+ 6

Posted: 7 years ago

#24

I had an office colleague who used to get up at 4:00 a.m. everyday, make breakfast for her in-laws, husband and daughter, make afternoon lunch, reach office then at 9 and leave at 4 to reach home and again make dinner and do all the other housework. It was compulsory for her while her husband used to do work on Sunday if he wishes. I found it odd and she kept telling that he works a lot but I couldn't understand that why her in-laws gave her so much work to do when she was working as well. It happens in every household I guess but making lunch and dinner as well as working is a bit too much.

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Jaitreya23

@Jaitreya23

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

#25

It seems to emanate from evolution perhaps. The men used to hunt and women used to cook. Perhaps its the physical strength thing. But now we have evolved and technology helps us in making life simpler. I guess its the way stereotypes are ingrained worldwide by women and men that generations over the same still exist. I think more than man or woman doing it, it should be a choice who wants to do it rather than who has to do it. If a woman chooses, its fine and if a man chooses its still fine.

Coercion never works and only cultivates resentment which in turn will breed contempt. Not a nice thing in a relationship.

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Pirated_Fun

@Pirated_Fun

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 7 years ago

#26

I stay alone far away from my hometown, I manage my IT job and household work and I do it quite well. But lot of the time, people say , Only you can manage it , I can not do it . Even those who don't have any house help or have them , their houses are so dirty and clumsy.

I agree change is coming, But it seems like it is coming in a very lethargic way , I have to blame the women too , specially those mothers who always say , My Raja beta can not do anything or They don't let their sons to entire kitchen forget other works,

In a very small section of society , few men know all household work, Most proudly show that they can not do anything .

Why don't people get it , your sexism will not feed you when you are hungry .

In our family I have seen all men from My Father or Cousins all can do all work, It came naturally to me But How many household that happens?

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JustMySelf

@JustMySelf

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

#27

Originally posted by: Pirated_Fun
I stay alone far away from my hometown, I manage my IT job and household work and I do it quite well. But lot of the time, people say , Only you can manage it , I can not do it . Even those who don't have any house help or have them , their houses are so dirty and clumsy.

I agree change is coming, But it seems like it is coming in a very lethargic way , I have to blame the women too , specially those mothers who always say , My Raja beta can not do anything or They don't let their sons to entire kitchen forget other works,

In a very small section of society , few men know all household work, Most proudly show that they can not do anything .

Why don't people get it , your sexism will not feed you when you are hungry .

In our family I have seen all men from My Father or Cousins all can do all work, It came naturally to me But How many household that happens?

honestly replying to how many house it happens then answer is wherever
there is love all those houses has both man n woman helping each other
n not thinking who will do n who will not..
ask any man any woman if they truly love each other they help their partners
seeing they are tired it comes as instinct to help out each other n give some
relief to the partner..
it is only in those house where man n woman are living the farce of marriage
that the man says why will i do n the woman complains why should i do..
coz it does not come naturally to them to love n care for each other selflessly..
to give each other bit relaxation ..

all these big talks of men do not help in household chores is only limited to those
houses where love is long dead..n the couple is living only a dead marriage..
without feeling for each others pain or sufferings ..
n to those who are carrying the corpse of the so called marriage its better to
separate than grind daily..n sulk oh what a life i have ..

Edited by JustMySelf - 7 years ago

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chocodilla

@chocodilla

Voyager

Posted: 7 years ago

#28

Originally posted by: Parvati..

I wouldn't want to see my dad do household chores.EVER. No girl with a little respect for her dad would like to see their dad with broom or rag in his hand cleaning house. It's disgusting to make him do all that. Feminists are pathetic humans anyway. Sane people should avoid listening their crap.

But if you feel happy seeing your dad in that condition good for you. I am happy with my family set up. To each their own.

@bold Sure, to each their own!

@red but who gave you the right to decide this, if I may ask? My parents are doctors with hectic schedules, and I want both of them to be equal partners and share the household chores.

My husband and I work in IT with hectic schedules. Both of us clean our house on weekends, with a 'dirty rag' in hand, mind you! Oops, looks like I lack respect for my dad and husband 🤢

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Aisha

@MOTHERHOOD

Stunner

+ 10

Posted: 7 years ago

#29

Originally posted by: chocodilla

@bold Sure, to each their own!

@red but who gave you the right to decide this, if I may ask? My parents are doctors with hectic schedules, and I want both of them to be equal partners and share the household chores.

My husband and I work in IT with hectic schedules. Both of us clean our house on weekends, with a 'dirty rag' in hand, mind you! Oops, looks like I lack respect for my dad and husband 🤢

YOU ARE ARGUING WITH A WALL.

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1127649

Suspended

Posted: 7 years ago

#30

Originally posted by: chocodilla

@bold Sure, to each their own!

@red but who gave you the right to decide this, if I may ask? My parents are doctors with hectic schedules, and I want both of them to be equal partners and share the household chores.

My husband and I work in IT with hectic schedules. Both of us clean our house on weekends, with a 'dirty rag' in hand, mind you! Oops, looks like I lack respect for my dad and husband 🤢

Nice story.

@bold

Good for you.

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