The ten worst Hindi films of 2005

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sheetal

@sheetald

Rocker

Posted: 19 years ago

Contrary to popular belief, this was a hard list to compile.

As opposed to the Best Films list, nominees for this one kept suggesting themselves, and for a while it looked like we were going to do a 50 Worst Films feature. But better sense (and a lack of patience) prevailed, and we decided to go with the year's biggest disappointments -- the films we expected something from, the ones that let us down. There are a couple of hundred awful films, but they're the films we knew would be awful. This bunch is groanworthy stuff that had (some kind of) potential, at least on paper.

These are the movies that betrayed us. And we were nice. While a few films definitely qualify for this year's crop of turkeys, we chose not to include movies with even a single redeeming virtue. Which basically means a lot of really bad films were saved merely by the cinematographer.

2005

10. Waqt Director: Vipul Shah
Cast: Akshay Kumar, Amitabh Bachchan, Priyanka Chopra, Shefali Shah
The review Why the axe: A father-son story gone unwatchably wrong, Waqt had the Big B hamming with intense melodrama, and Akshay trying hard to keep a straight face.

9. Padmashree Laloo Prasad Yadav Director:Mahesh Manjrekar
Cast: Sunil Shetty, Mahesh Manjrekar, Johnny Lever, Masumeh
The review Why the axe: This disastrous A Fish Called Wanda rehash makes it to the list because it brought forth a couple of home truths: that restaurateur Sunil Shetty should not act, and that Mahesh Manjrekar should not direct, a fact also highlighted by his product-placement epic, Viruddh.

8. Kaal Director: Soham Shah
Cast: John Abraham, Viveik Oberoi, Ajay Devgan, Lara Dutta, Esha Deol
The review Why the axe: Despite the cringe-inducing cast, we were intrigued by Soham's 'young genius' hype before the film, and the songs were good. Unfortunately, too many of us ended up actually watching the movie before we knew how bad it was. Another of Ajay's mistakes in a year littered with them.

7. Bewafaa Director: Dharmesh Darshan
Cast: Akshay Kumar, Kareena Kapoor, Anil Kapoor
The review

Why the axe: Taking a good cast and making them all look bad is a pretty tough ask, but Darshan handles it with ease. With Akshay playing ridiculously named popstar 'Indian Raja', the insufferable film dragged on even as audiences wisely exited the theatre early.

6. Neal 'N' Nikki Director: Arjun Sablok
Cast: Uday Chopra, Tanissha
The review Why the axe: We grinned affectionately at Arjun Sablok in DDLJ, where he played SRK's openmouthed second-string sidekick Rocky. Making movies is a different ballgame, however, and this knickers-and-nonsense attempt at cool might just be the most unwatchable thing to ever come out of the hallowed Yashraj stables.

5. Bachke Rehna Re Baba Director: Govind Menon
Cast: Mallika Sherawat, Rekha, Satish Shah, Paresh Rawal
The review Why the axe: After all of Mallika's dress-bursting Cannes photo-ops this year, we wanted to see how she'd outdo original seductress Rekha in this evidently well-cast Heartbreakers remake. The result is painful, the film and Mallika pushed-up to the extreme, and Rekha exhibiting a strong case for long overdue retirement.

4. Home Delivery Sujoy Ghosh
Cast: Viveik Oberoi, Ayesha Takia, Boman Irani
The review Why the axe: Because we loved the promos. Because the songs were nice. Because we genuinely like Boman. Because most of us were mad over Jhankaar Beats. Because if this is the most 'original' film in Bollywood, we're better off remaking Sholay.

3. Mr Ya Miss Director: Antara Mali, Sachin Puranik
Cast: Antara Mali, Ritesh Deshmukh, Aftab Shivdasani
The review Why the axe: Antara, where do we begin? A premise that doesn't deserve to be borrowed, brutally bad performances, and a ludicrously unappealing look. Why an attractive woman should showcase herself thus, we'll never know. A doomed, misguided attempt at direction. Tsk tsk.

2. Shaadi No 1 Director: David Dhawan
Cast: Fardeen Khan, Ayesha Takia, Zayed Khan, Sanjay Dutt
The review Why the axe: There was a time when David Dhawan's movies used to be genuinely funny. If nothing, they had a couple of chuckle-provoking moments. Now, with films like Maine Pyaar Kyun Kiya, he's pushing the envelope and trying to get away with an absolute lack of mirth.

1. Mangal Pandey Director: Ketan Mehta
Cast: Aamir Khan, Toby Stephens, Rani Mukerji, Amisha Patel
The review 'Why?' is exactly what anyone who sat through this monstrosity wants to ask Ketan. A ridiculous mix of irrelevant nautch girls and satis, full with homoerotic man-on-man mudwrestling 'subtext', mars the tale of a controversial yet iconic Indian hero. With hype bubbling in a four-year cauldron, this had to be the disappointment of the year. Sigh. O Aamir, how we used to love ya.