Updated FanFiction - Part 7 page 7! - Page 4

Zain looked up to find the crowd attentively waiting for him to continue, he gave the counselor a blank look when she gestured for him to go on.

"Is that all you have to say?" she asked uncertainly.

"Yeah" Zain replied with equal uncertainty. He hadn't planned on giving them a verbal biography of himself so he thought all he said was sufficient. Unfortunately, the counselor didn't seem to agree.

"Zain, could you tell us more about why you chose alcohol as a means of recovery from your broken relationship?" the counselor probbed when Zain stubbornly refused to acknowledge her silent gestures.

"Well for one, alcohol didn't have the tendency to ask when someone is clearly unwilling to answer" Zain replied with annoyance clear on his face and voice. He knew he was being unreasonably rude but he couldn't help it. There were things he didn't want to talk about and sadly, his father paid a huge chunk of cash just so he'd sit with strangers and talk about those exact things.

"So did alcohol keep you away from answering just others or yourself aswell?" the counselor carried on completely missing his obvious hint but maybe she didn't miss it, maybe she just chose to ignore it. Zain took a deep breath as he tried to calm his growing annoyance which made no sense to him because even he realised the counselor was only doing her job.

"There was nothing to answer to myself. My girlfriend left me. What's there to question? She didn't love me like I loved her. Period" Zain replied, his hurried tone displaying his anger.

"Well, we'll stop here for short break. Let's get back after a while" the counselor wisely chose not to probe for more answers. Zain got up to help himself to the refreshments laid out passing the teacher's pet who had her head bent furiously writing down notes from the session. What caught Zain's attention was what was her observation of his behavior.

Zain Abdullah - unwilling, angry and confused.

"Unwilling and angry, I understand but confused?" Zain questioned as he stood above her. From his viewpoint, he couldn't see her face, just her bright yellow scarf. She looked up with wide eyes. Momentarily Zain thought she had pretty eyes but brushed the thought aside.

'A day without alcohol and I'm thinking this, after a week I would probably find beauty in caterpillars' Zain thought crossly.

"You weren't supposed to see that" she said as she flipped her notepad shut.

"Well, damn me to hell because I just did" Zain replied sarcastically.

"It's just my observation and I'm not a qualified counselor so it means nothing" teacher's pet tried to push the matter under the carpet. Well, that's just her bad luck because Zain wasn't letting it go. He felt like a timebomb; every little thing pushing him over the edge. Little Miss. Sunshine could dream Zain was letting go of this.

"Well there must be a reason for you to think I'm confused? Right?" he asked with agitation.

"I just feel you're confused about what you want at this point and even if you figure it out, how to get there would be abother confusing question" she spoke with genuine concern and for unfathamoble reasons even her concern rubbed Zain in the wrong way.

"So that's your expert opinion based on the three sentences I spoke? That I can't decide on whether I want recovery or not? What do you think I came to do here? Play poker?" Zain taunted.

"I... I didn't mean to offend" she began backpedalling while Zain cut in.

"And for God's sake, could you not try and replace the sun with that cursed scarf of yours. I'm having hard time keeping my eye intact" Zain remarked in anger as he strode to the exit. He didn't understand and nor was willing to understand what angered him. It definitely wasn't what the portable sun wrote about him. He was in a bad mood and without a logical reason.

Alia stared at the slammed door as she tried to understand where she went wrong. She wasn't a professional at the job, she just volunteered to help her professor with odd jobs like note taking,etc. As she turned around, she found her professor standing behind her with understanding eyes.

"It's not your fault. He's just recently given up alcohol so it's very hard for him to adjust"

Aliyah nodded but still couldn't rid herself of the guilt. Alcoholics, just as any other addicts, were often sensitive regarding their addiction. She should have been more careful with her observations.

The rest of the day was uneventful. Aliyah went from work to home and vice versa. A week had passed and Zain hadn't returned to the sessions, needless to say, Aliyah's guilt increased.

Zain was lying on his bed. Since his last disastrous visit to the sessions, he hadn't returned. He stayed home and his resolve to abstain from alcohol had weakened over the week, it had pretty much broken on the first day itself but he wouldn't let himself admit it. He would drink alcoholic drinks but not alcohol; cocktails and other drinks with a touch of alcohol. He would sometimes break the rule and take a sip, all the while consoling himself that an occasional drink isn't all that bad. He looked up when the door to his room opened. His mother stood with a pile of clothing in her hand and a bright smile on her face.

"What's that with you, mom?" Zain asked as his mother strode to his closet.

"Your clothes from the laundry basket. I thought I should put them here" his mother said as she opened his closet. Zain just smiled knowing exactly why his mother came personally instead of a servant.

"Are you up for a wedding celebration?" Suraiya asked as she rummaged through his closet when she could simply lay the clothes in a rack meant for them.

"Not really" Zain replied his voice sounding thick even to his own ears. He knew his mother was looking for alcohol in his closet.

"It's a family friend's wedding Zain" his mother replied still facing the closet.

Zain swallowed, "There must be some excuse we haven't used already"

"You need to get out Zain" Suraiya tried keeping the conversation alive while she looked for any hidden bottles.

"Someday maybe I will" he joked as he swallowed against the lump in his throat. It wasn't that he blamed his mother for the mistrust but just the fact that his personal space needed to be intruded in order to make sure he wasn't doing anything that put his health at risk was overwhelming.

"Well I'll head out to get ready" his mother said when her scrutiny was done and Zain just smiled and nodded in response.

Zain rubbed his face with both his hands. He wasn't back to square one but Zain could feel himself slipping again. Although this time around his family made a conscious effort of keeping drinks away from, Zain was finding his resolve slipping. He threaded his fingers through his hair as he grudgingly admitted to sun's ambassador being right. He was in a confused state. He was well over his 'majnoo' phase and wanted to end the alcohol chapter but then there were times when drinking didn't seem so bad. Zain didn't like where he brought his life to. He felt like he was standing a crossroad and needed to shift lanes to go the right direction but shifting the lane wasn't as easy as he initially thought it'd be. Zain slipped his hand under his bed and pulled the bottle his mother was after, out. He put the bottle against his forehead and sighed in frustration.

"I wish you weren't so tempting", Zain spoke with evident dejection.

"Do you have even an inkling of how badly you've screwed my life over?" Zain said as he held the bottle further away from his face.

"Do even realise how bloody dependant I am on you?" Zain asked as though expecting the bottle to justify it's stance in their addictive relationship.

"It's so hard trying to rid my need of you!" Zain complained as his grip got tighter on the neck of the bottle.

"You're a bloody addictive little thing you know that?" Zain released the bottle and placed on the side table.

"Sometimes I wonder who has more control over me"

Aliyah smiled as she wore an ankle length anarkali with a dupatta on her shoulder and a hijab of the same color over her head. She walked into where the function was being held and found her brother standing awkwardly at the entrance.

"You look like you're having wedding jitters and the sad part is it's not even your wedding" Aliyah joked and Walid turned around.

"Can we run away? My car is just around the corner" her brother said with a smile.

"Only people with sufficient finance should runaway. I have a non-feasible career and you have no degree so let's not consider what we can't survive" Aliyah replied with a smile.

"Let's face the music then"

Zain huffed as he entered the hall. His mother was adamant he accompany them. Zain suspected her insistence had little to do with his dislike for social life and more to do with like for alcohol but Zain didn't comment on itand agreed to coming without even asking for the name of family holding the affair. What difference would make? Zain was moving away from the crowd to the back end of the hall when he collided with someone.

"I.. I.. I'm sorry" the guy stuttered. He looked younger than Zain, somewhere in his early twenties.

"It's alright. Not like you broke a bone or something so it's all good" Zain felt like reassuring the guy because he'd never seen a guy more nervous than the one in front of him. He wouldn't look him in the eye.

"I guess.. yeah" the nervous wreck thankfully managed without stuttering and Zain just nodded and moved ahead.

He was utterly bored out of his mind in the first half an hour, making conversations with random people and complementing women who seriously should consider going for a circus advertisement with the amount of color on their face. Currently, he was stuck with a girl who was pretty as long as she didn't speak but unfortunately she liked speaking - a lot. Zain was hoping for a tornado to hit the hall and put him out of his misery.

"Walid, you can't go on like this forever! Standing in a corner. How are you ever going to get ahead in life with this sort of attitude? You can't honestly expect get ahead in life with this socially reclusive attitude!" Zain heard the angry whispers from behind him. He looked up to find Barbie was still narrating the tragic tale of how no one understood her. He politely excused himself to greet a friend when in reality he wanted to get away from her and the only opening was the guy being admonished by his Gabbar like father.

"Arrey I've looking all over for you" Zain exclaimed when he approached the father-son duo.

"I'm sorry?" the father spoke as he addressed Zain.

"Oh sorry uncle, I meant him" Zain slapped the guy in the back in an overly friendly fashion as the guy looked up with wide eyes. Zain silently hoped that the lachaar bahu like beta would follow through with Zain's lie.

"You know each other?" father Gabbar asked incredulously and Zain smiled with ease.

"Of course. We just met at the entrance and he said he'd show me around but then got lost himself. By the way, it's Zain Abdullah" Zain lied through his teeth with an assured smile as he extended his hand for a hand shake.

"Any relation to Usman Abdullah?" Gabbar Daddy asked as he returned the handshake.

"That would be my father, sir" Zain replied.

"Ahh enjoy the party, both of you" Zain sighed of relief when Gabbar left most probably to pinpoint someone else's shortcoming in life.

"Thanks a lot" the stuttering wreck managed.

"Don't worry about it" Zain replied with a smile, "besides I'm not Mother Theresa here, I was bored of the only option of company I had so by helping you, I helped both of us"

"Oh.. I'm Walid by the way" Zain didn't mention that he'd already heard the name being said in a very sour tone and accepted the handshake.

"Zain Abdullah"

"I know.. I mean you just told my father so I know because of that" Walid blubbered and Zain wondered if leaving the company of Barbie for Blubber Machine was a wise choice.

"Yeah that's pretty obvious. So you're from the groom side or the bride?" Zain asked as he looked around the wedding hall.

"Bride"

There was an awkward silence where Walid was thinking of several different topics to make conversation but finding it hard to settle for one and Zain wondered if that was all Walid had to say.

"So.. where are you from?" in a bout of nervousness Walid asked the question which even he realized the stupidity of after it tumbled out of his mouth.

"Uganda" Zain replied in good humor. Walid laughed feeling a little at ease.

"I'm weirdly nervous around people I meet if you haven't already guessed"

"Pretty obvious" Zain replied as he picked a glass of cocktail from a passing waiter. He took a sip and almost spat it out - all fruit.

"Don't you have something to drink around here?" Zain asked.

"I dunno. You could ask the waiter?"

"No, I mean the real drinks"

"Well, the one you're holding isn't exactly a virtual image" Walid replied while Zain laughed.

"I mean with a little touch of alcohol" Zain clarified while Walid coughed on his drink.

"You okay?" Zain asked while Walid laughed.

"Alcohol? Forget finding alcohol in here, you wouldn't find it in fifty mile radius around the house" Walid replied, making sure Zain got the idea. Zain absorbed the information with raised eyebrows.

"Oh"

"Yeah oh" Walid answered, still laughing.

"Well... what's there to do?" Zain asked desperately trying to keep alcohol off his mind.

"Enjoy the party" Walid replied in a flat tone.

"Just the way you're enjoying it?"

"I'm suggesting what's been suggested to me countless of times" Walid offered in a bored tone.

"Yeah.. well" before Zain could formulate a reply, his eye caught the sight of someone. He swung his gaze back and right across him, teacher's pet was standing animatedly chatting with someone. Zain swore under his breath. It completely slipped his mind to let his father know that Aliyah Haider was an assistant to his counselor. Of all the coincidences that could occur!

Zain panicked as he scanned the room for an exit. He needed to be out of the hall before the religious hermit recognized him and everyone found out about his shameful addiction. Zain said a quick bye to Walid and made a hurried exit out of the hall. He took a breath of fresh air once he was outside. Zain was making his way out when he spotted something that made his heart beat faster. He saw a small carton filled with his only vice. He took in a deep breath as he began to argue with himself. Zain was divided in half. Half of him wanted to grab a bottle before anyone noticed while the reasonable half argued that this was not the place nor the time. Zain took a painful step away thinking of his father. He began to walk away but against his will looked back longingly at the carton.

"Hey man, you want a bottle?" a twenty something guy asked him as he picked a bottle and offered him, "courtesy of the groom's family" the guy continued oblivious to the inner turmoil he just thrust Zain into. Unfortunately, Zain realized it was his favorite brand.

"Just one sip" Zain silently promised himself as he accepted the bottle from the guy who playfully winked him.

Zain went around the building to find a peaceful spot where he could enjoy his drink. He didn't want to be caught by his family members. He sat in the quieter corner of the garden outside the hall. Just as he opened the lid, he heard his mother calling out his name. He immediately jumped up headed to the huge dumpsters to discard the drink but as he reached out to throw the drink in, his hand felt immobile. He knew his mother would see him with it but for some reason he couldn't chuck the bottle into the bin. He felt as though he was ridding himself of a limb instead of a beer bottle.

"Curse you to hell and back" Zain whispered in frustration as he ducked and fitted himself in between the foul smelling dumpsters. He sat there waiting for his mother to pass the dimly lit area. He hugged his bottle while trying to hold his breath because the limited supply of air smelt of dead dogs. He sat huddled with the beer bottle when a blob of something slimy dropped on his shoulder, he looked at it but ignored it since there wasn't anything he could do about it. Zain feeling the coast was clear, straightened out his legs and arms to hoist himself up but then heard the sound of bangles and quickly ducked into the narrow space between the bins. He sat there with his legs curled and his arms protectively encircling the bottle. To Zain's despair, the person decided to take a tour of the dumpster area. He then heard bottles breaking and figured someone was discarding bottles. Zain patiently waited for the person to get done with her task when suddenly his phone started to vibrate which wouldn't have been an issue under normal circumstances but in this case it kept vibrating against the metal dumpster which resonated its sound in the very empty and ridiculously silent alleyway. Zain thought of getting up but before he could, the girl walked up to where he was. Zain looked up to find Aliyah Haider peering curiously at his crouched position. He saw recognition dawn into her eyes as she took in his features. He tried to explain but she saw the bottle tilt in the cradle of his arms and if disappointment were an expression then Zain would've sworn she was wearing it. Before Zain could think of a blatant and convincing lie, Aliyah swiftly turned around but before she walked he heard her say,

"If it's worth all this hiding, embarrassment and shame then drink it without a second thought"

While she left, Zain stopped in the awkward position to digest what she had said. He looked at the bottle and for the first time took in his surroundings. He was sitting in between two piles of waste in a secluded corner of a wedding hall with a blob of something suspiciously smelly sitting comfortably on his shoulder, all for a sip of alcohol. Zain couldn't remember the last he felt shame but at that moment he wanted nothing more than just to disappear. He fell back with the bottle in hand, frustrated with the whole situation. He wanted to be the better man who saw alcohol for what it's worth and walked away from the addiction but it wasn't that easy. It was a goddamn need! How do you get rid of a need?

Zain got up in anger and left the area, the bottle completely forgotten in his hand when he crashed into someone. He realized it was the same guy who offered him in the first place. Zain felt an entirely unjustified need to bury his fist in the guy's face but knew he was just looking to blame someone for his own shortcomings.

"Hey man! The bride's family is pretty tight on alcohol prohibition. You don't wanna get caught with that" Zain saw the guy look at his bottle with temptation and he almost laughed at the desperation there but the thought that his desperation was far worse than the guy's stopped him. Zain went to hand him the bottle but then stopped.

"You don't want it, man?" the guy asked eagerly.

"No" Zain replied and let the bottle fall to the ground, breaking into pieces while he walked away.

"What the hell dude!" Zain didn't bother to reply or give an explanation as he made his way back to the hall after chucking his soiled jacket in the dustbin.

"Ahh Zain come here son" Usman Abdullah called him as he entered the hall. Zain swallowed nervously as he made his way to his father.

'He doesn't know what you were up to so calm the hell down' Zain mentally chastised himself as he stood in front of his father.

"Meet Mr. Ghulam Haider"

"We've already met. Zain is my son's friend" Zain smiled with recognition as Gabbar uncle recalled the incident.

"Ahh well I'm glad that he's got some good friends in the circle. If I'm not wrong you have a daughter aswell" His father joked and Zain laughed awkwardly.

"Yes, Aliyah" Zain's head shot up at the mention of the name.

'It cannot possibly be her. My fate cannot be that messed up' Zain thought as his eye widened when the religious hermit joined their circle as she gazed with the admiration of five year old at Gabbar uncle.

"Yes Abbu?" Zain wanted to silently excuse himself before she saw him but his father's arm on his shoulder restricted him. Never had his father's arm felt as heavy as it did in that moment.

"Meet Mr. Abdullah and his son" Gabbar uncle said affectionately as he gestured towards them. Zain silently waited for the moment of gruesome truth as Aliyah looked towards them. She smiled politely and introduced herself and during the entire conversation, she did not once mention or hint at Zain's addiction. Zain stood at apprehension waiting for her to make a reference but the conversation ended with smile on his father's face as she left. Zain let out a sigh of relief at the momentary turn of fate. His eyes followed Aliyah around the room making rounds. He had a nagging feeling that she might discuss his addiction with someone. There was a bolt of anxiety every time he saw Aliyah and a guest laughing, thinking that maybe they were laughing at him. He stood rooted to his spot beside his father as the night progressed. It was time for dinner and Zain felt nervous as he made his way to the buffet. Every time someone whispered, he'd feel as though he was being discussed. Every time someone looked his way, he'd think it was a suspicious glance. Zain silently waited for the moment his father would express his immense disappointment at his careless behavior. He had noticed a girl from Aliyah's crowd of friends continuously throw him looks and every one of them put Zain over the edge with anxiety.

Doesn't the religious hermit know of sins of backbiting? Bloody hypocrite' Zain thought angrily as the girl threw him another glance over her shoulder.

'Is she printing to memory what an alcoholic looks like?' Zain thought with frustration as he moved out of her line of vision.

"Hey" Zain looked around to find Walid with a platter of food in his hand.

"Ey"

"Why don't you have food?" Walid asked when he saw Zain was just standing staring at the other guests but not helping himself to the buffet.

"Yeah... I was just getting to that" Zain replied with a smile he was far from feeling. He moved to the dinner table when he saw the same girl look at him and whisper something to her friend and then laugh. Zain's grip on the empty plate tightened as his paranoia increased.

"Don't mind Rukhsar" he heard Walid say as they stood in line for the buffet.

"Who?" Zain asked, puzzled.

"The girl who's staring at you. She makes people uncomfortable with her blatant flirting"

"Flirting?" Zain's head swung on its own accord to take a look at Walid behind him. Was Walid mentally challenged in addition to being verbally challenged?

"Yeah... why do you think she's waving at you?" Walid asked as Zain looked back at Rukhsar and sure enough she was waving at him. He looked at her with wide eyes and then Zain laughed. He laughed with all his heart. There was mirth, joy but most of all relief in his laughter. He continued laughing while Walid silently concluded that the one friend he was able to make had obvious mental issues to sort.

"I'm sorry... I just" Zain couldn't explain to Walid the reason for his delirious happiness. He just couldn't believe his level of paranoia to mistake a flirtatious looks for suspicious ones.

"You okay?" Walid asked unable to hold back his curiosity.

"Good as can be" Zain replied with ease and a smile. "Let me grab something to eat"

Walid watched as Zain made his way through the crowd with extra vigor in his steps. Before he knew it, Zain was back with his plate of food.

"So you seem to be quite familiar with Rukhsar's flirtatious nature" Zain commented slyly as he bit into his chicken piece.

"Unfortunately it's not from personal experience, I've just noticed her around here and there so I know" Walid replied and Zain laughed.

"You know the wedding isn't so bad"

"No?" Walid asked in disbelief.

"So you have a few overly flirtatious friends who don't pay you much attention but that doesn't mean you hate on the whole tradition" Zain teased.

"Since when did you become such a fan?" Walid asked feeling slightly annoyed.

"Since I realized I had a fan following" Zain replied in a self assured tone.

"Yeah yeah" Walid replied dismissively.

The rest of the night progressed smoothly and Zain began to loosen up. He started to let himself enjoy the night and against better judgment flirted around a bit but that was second nature to Zain. He wouldn't be able to hold a conversation without compliments flowing out his mouth. But as the night went on something subtle yet significant began developing with Zain. He was feeling something akin to respect for a certain religious hermit. They didn't speak nor did they exchange glances. Zain knew she had kept his secret without knowing him or he asking her to and that little fact made Zain admire her. This was new for Zain; respect was usually in built in him. It was an emotion reserved for the people he was taught to respect, he never felt the emotion on his own. As Zain walked out at end of the night, as smile tugged on his lips. A possibly disastrous night turned out into a not so bad experience.