is it really always anandi's fault? - Page 2

Agree with you TM

Originally posted by: aparnauma

People put the responsibility entirely on her and then blame her afterwards.

She has been conditioned by her mother from childhood that she has to behave in a way that is pleasing to her sasra and her life depended on earning their affcetion.

Her mother had told her that her maika is not her home her parents are not her people and she belonged with her sasrewasle and this conditioning happened right from the time she was old enough to listen and understand spoken word.

Soon after her marriage when she entered her sasre wale DS may be a loving affectionate person but her methods of grooming Anandi as a bahu can never be defended.She was the one who drilled into her head that a woman's place should be at a lower level than her man's.She got scolded for doing better than Jagya during the short period she went to school.DS clipped her wings by making her burn her books and forcing her to discontinue her education and silencing her when ever she voiced an opinion.She was the one who drilled into her head that she should never interfere when elders talk.and the decisions should be left to elders.

Only after Jagya left her and ruined her life did DS change her behaviour towards her and allowed her to be more vocal about her opinions because she learnt that ANandi had been right and she was wrong.

Coming to her relationship with Jagya she was younger than him but more mature than him and he completely depended on her and her wisdom from that age and used to make decisions after consulting her.His parents did not do much to decrease the dependancy and instead they encouraged it.When he went to Mumbai he was so lost when he was on his own that he latched on to Gauri and his downfall started.By the time he realised that his downfall was due to lack of Anandi's wise counsel he went back and tried to grab her back from Shiv when he realised that he lost her forever he still looked upto her for advice and guidance and she couldn't ignore that.

That was the reason she black mailed into agreeing for a marriage because then he would have acompanion and would stop looking at the past and look into future.But he wanted a partner of her choice because he had more faith in her judgement than his.

Then the Sanchi mess happened.Anandi was against the match but no one listened to her.

Singhs thought Sanchi is a good choice and also keeping in mind Anandi's welfare they agreed Jagya believed that Sanchi was Anandi's choice because of mis/noncommunication and Anandi believed that he has chosen Sanchi even after knowing her brattiness for the sake of the family and then proceeded to help Sanchi become an ideal partner for Jagya where she failed miserably it was no fault of her but it was Sanchi who cheated her and everybody.

Now she got to know that Sanchi has not changed and told why Jagya broke off the engagement they want her to go and talk with Singhs and convince them to give another chance.She herself cannot say no because she has not given up on Sanchi yet and still confused about Sanchi's motives.They put her in a position where she feels compelled to go and talk to Singhs.

This mission will fail bigtime when Jagya walks in with Ganga.Again she will be blamed for keeping quiet about growing bond between Jagya and Ganga.The fact that she raised this question with Jagya six months ago as well as tried to raise her doubts with her husband will conveniently be ignored and she will be criticised for this.

She felt Sanchi and Jagya were not suitable even when Ganga was not in picture and even today she feels the same whether Ganga or no Ganga but people will criticise her for not talking about jagya ganga when it is not her place to speak about them in the first place.

She will be criticised for what ever she does or say or did not do or did not say.

She is very vocal about raising her voice against social injustices because that is her basic nature and it is instictive .In front of the family it is Anandi who has been systematically suppressed from her childhood days who has been conditioned to keep quiet.So it will be difficult for her to find voice.She may be older and understands better but conditiong makes her hesitant to voice her opinions.

Originally posted by: hisusmita

Agree with you TM

From that tender age that little girl has been taught this. Otherwise in that age she was so outspoken, always raised her voice against wrong, But her parents and after marriage her sasrewala in the process of making a perfect bahu of BH made her change her nature of being vocal. She is always good at heart and will remain so. But from that childhood she has seen raising voice results in so much of torture, problems, Slowly she moulded herself as the beendni of BH the way DS wanted her to be. DS burnt her books, stopped her studying , making that 8 year old girl do all the household works and always think herself less than her grandson.

In Childhood Jagya always used to take her advice and he has seen those have done good for him, That became Jagya's habit and their parents supported that.

When Jagya left her too she never wanted him back, Yes she pinned for him but never interfered herself. Its Jagya when realized his sachha payar is actually not sachha came running after her again and again for his every problem. And she being his friend cant ognore him to provide the help as she cant see anyone in pain, Also she never learnt to ignore , disobey, disrespect the elders.

After change when Jagya went to CH to tell her to convince BH wale about his mumbai visit.

So when DS told her to tell Jagya to get married , she cant say no. Then Jagya told her to find her bride. She cant say no to her friend.

Now in Sanchi case from the begining she was saying no, no one listened to her.when she asked both Jagya and Ganga , No one told her clearly about their feelings. She tried to tell Shiv about her doubt. He told Jagya has assured him so he trust Jagya.

Now again Shiv is requesting her to talk to BH.

Everytime she will be dragged in everything and she being to good at heart cant say no and people find fault with her.

IMO its not her fault, till date she has never did anything with bad intention, Its only how she has been taught and treated since childhood which shaped her personality