What is Jagya's love for Ganga? - Page 3

@shankythebest

Originally posted by: sectoreight

Just curious, how do you gals make a man feel 'looked up to' ... without necessarily having to become a victim needing rehabilitation.

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<div>If you were just equals with your husband/fiance/lovers... how do you make him feel looked up to?

Actually there is nothing wrong in being a strong assertive woman. Some men love that and are attracted by it.

Personally, I feel sincerety is key. If there is truth in the praise it cannot really be termed just 'stroking the ego'.

'Stroking the ego' generally has a negative connotation. But if one is honest in praise the the negative connotation falls away (most of the time). One doesn't have to look hard to find positives. One just needs to have the right outlook.

Originally posted by: sectoreight

you are right Picasso, it would indeed invalidate the original argument.

So continuing further, I want to ask you how come the dynamic is different between shiv and anandi.

Is it that shiv already feels like a man without anandi's validation? 😆

If so what is the quality you think that shiv has that does not require his ego to be massaged?

Bingo! Yes. Shiv and Anandi's relationship is more mature and also started off more formal. The mutual respect and admiration for professional accomplishments EACH has is also quite prevalent. Shiv did not have to lean on Anandi for achieving his professional goals so that confidence and self assurance is already inherent in him. Plus his personality is more stable, thoughtful and cautious. He is as independent as Anandi so he doesn't need to constantly seek approval. Also I think the way Shekhars raised him, plays a factor. I don't think they coddled him to distraction. So that shaped his personality too.

Originally posted by: sectoreight

@vasiraju,

excellent points!! This is what has been bothering me which started my other thread should jagya cut off relationship with ganga.

I too feel that he is not a man new to love. He has been through it too many times to not recognize the feeling of love. Though it started with humanitarian aspects, he was smart enough to know that he loves her.

Originally posted by: sectoreight

@vasiraju,

excellent points!! This is what has been bothering me which started my other thread should jagya cut off relationship with ganga.

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I too feel that he is not a man new to love. He has been through it too many times to not recognize the feeling of love. Though it started with humanitarian aspects, he was smart enough to know that he loves her.

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Jagya is not new to infatuation but love is a different ball game. Consciously he knows he has been committed to Saanchi now so the thought may have not occurred to him that what he feels for Ganga could be love.

The man has taken a beating with regards to affairs of the heart. Give him a break. His confide ce in the area of love is zero. He is focused for on e on everything and everyone but himself for once in his life. It's obvious he will have self doubt. Not too long ago he thought he still loved Anandi, that itself would steer him clear of any such thoughts for Ganga. Yeah, subconsciously it's there but his consciousness is blocking it. It can happen. It his coping skills, its his minds ways if protecting itself. Call it what you will, but it can happen.

We say that hindsight is 20/20. Later he will say, I probably always loved you but but never knew it until you went away. Cliched, yes but can also be true.

I also want to add that when people search for bride and bridegrooms the first thing which is kept in mind is the boy should earn a decent money.The boy should be better than the girl who can actually afford that girl.Girls earning more than man only happens in love marriages not in arrange marriages,mostly and its a fact.Most of the girls will themselves not like that her husband earns lesser than her.And its a fact that a doctor can never marry a rickshaw puller this is not a case of demeaning the rickshaw puller,its just a natural thing that the man will always feel inferior and the wife will feel insulted.And if the wife is like gauri then she will never left a chance to show how she earn more than her husband.So better to ignore such marriages.

Originally posted by: sectoreight

hey yanks,

good addendum.

Yes, ganga and manu definitely gave him a sense of purpose and a sense of contributing something which is so important for every human being. 👍🏼

So does that mean that ganga is nothing special compared to anandi per se, but just that she entered his life at the right time in the right place ... and anandi was in his life at the wrong time and wrong place?

No i never said that, and I dont think that's what it means ...that she is nothing special compared to Anandi...that's unfair...Anandi si a closed chapter, sorry...she's married to Shiv now. Ganga is special because she is right for Jagya...his feelings for her make her special...if a person is tall, short, educated, uneducated, older or younger than you...or if a person is beautiful or not...doesn't matter, once you fall in love with them, they become the most special person int he world. He wasn't right for anyone at that time of his life, he needed to learn several lessons...and so did his family. Child marriages are wrong even if the person you're married to is right...and this show taught that...but they did it using Jagya, they butchered him.

Originally posted by: yanks28

...his feelings for her make her special...

@yanks,

Originally posted by: sectoreight

@yanks,

I get your point ... but my intention was not to trash anandi, or to suggest that he pursue anandi even after being married to shiv.

I was just puzzled that ganga is more or less cut in the mold of anandi -- but he had so many, many problems with anandi, and he was so critical of her all the time... that it surprised me that he would fall in love with ganga who embodied everything that he once criticized.

I agree that people evolve and change their thoughts etc. as they evolve and grow, but I have never seen someone go for such a 360 degree change.

I understand that it is not an external checklist that Jagya is looking at, because by terms of external checklists both anandi and ganga are the same... it is something internal that Jagya has found in ganga.

The essence of ganga is something that appeals to Jagya more than the essence of anandi.

I was inquiring about the difference in the essence between the two (as perceived by Jagya)... and I think Picasso gave a definitive reply. Ganga makes him feel like a man, when anandi did not.

well I dont think you trashed Anandi.

as for Jagya changing...if he was going to be fully redeemed, it had to go in this direction...the sanskars he previously avoided and ran from are what he holds most dear to him now.

Yeah, Anandi and Ganga have similarities ...they believe in doing the same right and think many of the same things are wrong, but everyone has their own personality...their own behaviors, traits, peculiarities...something that makes them different. The feelings of being a man might have come out and been aided by Ganga but the main reason I feel the came out is because Jagya was finally ready to be a real man...he went through that change, he saw himself in the mirror and he fell to his knees and realized all his mistakes...and along came Ganga, someone who needed Jagya and someone with whom Jagya could be himself completely. I guess while Ganga is strong, wants to change and become educated...at the same time there are other things about her which Jagya could be attracted to. One time in a scene he laughed and told Mannu "tumhari maa pagal hai..." he finds vulnerability in her behind all her toughness...that's attractive too because that's what Jagya is like...on the cover he's a serious man now with very few things that interest him...deep down he's very emotional and loving, just see how he connects with Mannu...and mannu is now JaGan's uniting factor too.