is Shiv a perfect husband\fren? :( - Page 2

Does have to be about physical intimacy? Maybe shiv wants to just hold her, talk to her.. He really don't seem like the guy that will force her to be intimate. Both, anandi and shiv are right in their respective thoughts. For shiv there is nothing wrong in wanting to be near a person he loves. She is his wife, he not being close with a stranger. For anandi or anyone being intimate is not an easy thing. Being intimate is only physical it has many layers.

Speaking from experience, I am divorced myself. When I first met my current husband, who was never married before it took me while for me to open up to him, share my fears and aspirations with him. We dated a year but in the beginning it was a lot if effort on my part and lot of patience on his part.

I feel anandi needs to be given the benefit of the doubt but at the same she needs to put some effort move forward. They both need to the adult they are and communicate. I'm sure shiv will understand her.

Originally posted by: Bhumika18

Does have to be about physical intimacy? Maybe shiv wants to just hold her, talk to her.. He really don't seem like the guy that will force her to be intimate. Both, anandi and shiv are right in their respective thoughts. For shiv there is nothing wrong in wanting to be near a person he loves. She is his wife, he not being close with a stranger. For anandi or anyone being intimate is not an easy thing. Being intimate is only physical it has many layers.

Speaking from experience, I am divorced myself. When I first met my current husband, who was never married before it took me while for me to open up to him, share my fears and aspirations with him. We dated a year but in the beginning it was a lot if effort on my part and lot of patience on his part.

I feel anandi needs to be given the benefit of the doubt but at the same she needs to put some effort move forward. They both need to the adult they are and communicate. I'm sure shiv will understand her.

"perfect" word is only in dictionary...spl with human being...neither it's possiable there is no black and white in human charector, it's always grey...and i m really happy to see shiv a normal human being...atleast he didn't show that he is mahan...he allways been honest with her regarding his feeling...and he said that to anandi...without hididng it...when he felt he loves her he told her that and same with SR...atleast he didn't pretend that it doesn't matter to him anadi come close to him or not...and it is not possiable either...coz when u love some one u wanna hold her. hug her kiss her... and anandi without giving him chance started to think that he wanted to consumet...but may be possiable he just wanted to be clos to her...hold her tight.kiss her...and spend time with her... anyway we only do one thing now either to find out the reason who is right who is wrong or just we can wait

Mona Yaar I so happy to see you. saaret I stop commenting because thse anti A ppl r too much. khud hee problems sochte hqin aur khud hee Ako kostein hain. But ur post is a fresh air in this forum. Bahut saare log toh sachmuch hindi nahee jante aur khud hee matlab nikaltein hai., Eki azrse ke baad achcha thread diha. Thank you darling. As Suchi said they don't consider that Anandi is notfromUS, UKor a citigirl. She is from a village jahan abhi bhi pati ko parmeshwar hee mana jata hai.

All of you did a great job gyz who post the comment to this thread.👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼

Lets face the truth. No human being can read minds. Like the wise people say, talking is the key to a healthy relationship. Shiv is assuming Anandi is ready to take it to the next level which is why he didnt ask. When he mentioned it to her, she didn't say anything that would suggest that she didn't agree with him. All she had to do was say that she is not ready and Shiv would have understood. Simple as that.


Now there is absolutely nothing wrong with Anandi wanting to wait. Women have the right to say no even in marriage! So she can and should take as long as she wants to more comfortable; however, we can't blame Shiv for not understanding. In fact, it's actually nice to see Shiv so straight forward and not so all knowing. Lets face it...nobody knows what their is spouse is thinking or feeling ALL the time.

Originally posted by: Suchi-Virmanian

Not to mention that A has been brought with the mindset that the men can do what ever they want and they have the right to do so. So she is feeling guilty to even say anything.

She does not think its her right to so do. She thinks if she says then she is betraying him...but she is sooo not ready. Her body physically and mentally is just not prepared to have sex. I do not understand why people blame her!?

as a village girl... she does not know how to say no. But I think with shiv's help she will at least try to learn that , she can say .. no. She can ask him to wait.

To be honest, I think that is what Shiv is trying to do. I think that he's finally figured that she's insecure, and uncomfortable, but he wants Anandi to voice it. Yes, he's still getting intimate, but no where has he hinted that he's going to force himself on her. A hug, a kiss on the forehead, I'm sorry but can you really blame the guy whose madly in love? He loves her, and he wants to show that, but not at the cost of hurting her, but I think he's going to push the limit a little, until Anandi is able to either clearly back off, or voice that she's uncomfortable. First step on the path of recovery, is acceptance. Once she is able to openly accept that she has intimacy issues, only then will she be able to start closing that wound, and accept Shiv. When she is able to disassociate physical intimacy from her past experiences of being a wife, and thrown away for another woman, will she be able to have faith that this will not happen to her again, if she gives herself to Shiv. She's scared. Anyone who is married, knows the emotional attachment a wife will have with her husband due to that intimacy. It is hard to let go, get over, and move on. People who are bashing either Anandi, or Shiv, or even both, really need to calm down. Understand the depths of what this serial has been showing. It shows depth in every aspect, from the mental implications of marrying at the raw age of 10, to being left for another woman.

Shiv is a normal human being who has very carefully and gradually taken steps in his relationship. He has given Anandi support, time and space at every stage. And he has always given her options to make choices.

Originally posted by: Bhumika18

Does have to be about physical intimacy? Maybe shiv wants to just hold her, talk to her.. He really don't seem like the guy that will force her to be intimate. Both, anandi and shiv are right in their respective thoughts. For shiv there is nothing wrong in wanting to be near a person he loves. She is his wife, he not being close with a stranger. For anandi or anyone being intimate is not an easy thing. Being intimate is only physical it has many layers.

Speaking from experience, I am divorced myself. When I first met my current husband, who was never married before it took me while for me to open up to him, share my fears and aspirations with him. We dated a year but in the beginning it was a lot if effort on my part and lot of patience on his part.

I feel anandi needs to be given the benefit of the doubt but at the same she needs to put some effort move forward. They both need to the adult they are and communicate. I'm sure shiv will understand her.

Bhumika, thank you for sharing your personal experience.

yesterday episode proves that shiv is very understanding perfect husband .anyways i dont know this behaviour of anandi can make her selfish pshyco character .if u stop child marriage of jyoti apply mehndi on widow it does not make u brave good person only satisfying husband physical needs make u strong and good woman

Its amazing that everyone seems to think shiv should ask and make queries on Anandi';s state of mind regarding getting intimate...I can't seem to comprehend this mindset...I am sure a normal man will not marry a women in anticipation that in an unknown date he would be getting intimate with his wife...its ludicrous...she is a divorcee...big deal...its a given that getting intimate with your chosen partner is a part of being married...I would have found it weird if shiv had thoughts of cajoling his reluctant wife to get intimate ... comeon! was he seeking a glorified servant to look after his family's needs of a life partner? 😕